Longing for Love (35 page)

He thrust up and into her, stealing every thought from her mind that wasn’t about ultimate pleasure. After the last orgasmic frenzy, she would’ve bet her life she couldn’t do it again. She would’ve been dead wrong because once again she was climbing as he kept up the steady and relentless pace. She was supposed to be riding him, but he’d taken control of her mind, her body and her heart. To deny that would be foolish. She loved him. How could she not? But she couldn’t tell him. Not yet. Not until she was absolutely certain he wouldn’t leave.

He stole the last remaining thoughts from her mind with a mighty thrust that sent them both into release. For the longest time, she lay on top of him, pulsating with aftershocks. With his strong arms tight around her, she felt safe and adored. And loved.
 

Chapter 20

“Are you going to tell me why you were crying before?”

As Tiffany shook her head, a tear escaped from the corner of her eye.

Blaine used the tip of his index finger to brush it away. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Tiffany…”

After the intense way he’d loved her, she couldn’t possibly tell him she’d been planning to leave him.

“Are you still upset about what my mother said? I told you, it doesn’t matter. I don’t care what anyone thinks.”

“I’m afraid that eventually people like your mother will convince you I’m not worth the aggravation—”

“Stop. Please don’t do this. Don’t be driven by fear or worries about what other people might say. I’m not Jim. I’m not your dad. It’s not fair to expect me to do the same thing they did.”

How did he do that? How did he zero in on her deepest fears and allay them so effortlessly?

“Do you think I don’t understand?” He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Your father left you, your husband left you, so naturally, if you let yourself have feelings for me, I will, too, right?”

Tiffany’s throat tightened with emotion. “Maybe.”

“Please don’t worry about that. I’m right where I want to be. I waited so damned long to be able to hold you and kiss you and make love with you. I thought I’d go crazy waiting for you.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“I don’t want you to lose your job because of me.”

“If I lose my job, it’ll be because of me, not you. I’ve been pushing the mayor’s buttons since the day I got here. He’s up my ass all the time about everything, including the length of my hair.”

“I like the length of your hair,” she said, running her fingers through it.

“All the more reason not to cut it,” he said, holding her still for his kiss. “Why are your brows still furrowed?”

Once again, she was unsettled by the intense way he paid attention to her. “Are they?”

He ran a finger from one eyebrow to the other. “Uh-huh.”

“What your mother said—”

“I told you not to pay any attention to her.”

“I was wondering how you lost your last job.”

After a long pause, he said, “I don’t like to talk about that.”

“You don’t like to talk about anything.”

The fingers that had been combing through her hair stilled. “That’s not true.”

“I don’t know anything about you other than what you do for work and who some of your friends are.”

“What do you want to know?”

Tiffany tried to think of some innocuous questions she could ask to work up to what she really wanted to know. “Do you have siblings?”

“Two brothers, two sisters.”

“Where are they?”

“My younger brother is in college, but the others are scattered around New England.”

“Are you close to them?”

“I talk to them all just about every week. Does that count as close?”

Tiffany, who used to yearn for a big family, would’ve loved to have four siblings she talked to every week. She’d often been envious of the closeness she’d witnessed among Mac and his siblings. “Yes, that counts. Are you the oldest?”

“Second oldest. What else do you want to know?”

“I want to know everything. I’ve told you about my bad stuff. Are you going to tell me about yours?”

“I hate to think about it, let alone talk about it. It’s all in the past. I’d like to leave it there.”

Tiffany started to protest but thought better of it. Despite his tender care and intense lovemaking, she felt stung by his unwillingness to share his past with her.

He kissed the top of her head and squeezed her tightly. “Do you remember the first time we met?”

The abrupt shift in the conversation caught her off guard.

“In Maddie’s hospital room after the accident at the marina,” he said. “Remember?”

“Yes,” she said with a secretive smile.

“What?”

“I thought you were hot and said as much to Maddie.”

“Funny, I thought the same about you—that day and every time I ran into you afterward. When I saw Mac, the first thing I asked was if you were single. I thought I’d
die
when he said you were married.”

“Is that so?”

Nodding, he traced the outline of her lips with the tip of his index finger. “But then he said your marriage was on the rocks, and I was filled with foolish hope. The night you handcuffed yourself to Jim, and he called the police… Seeing you…naked…” His finger moved in a tantalizing path over her chin to her chest, between her breasts and back up to circle her nipple. “It was all I could do to function professionally when I wanted to unlock those cuffs and drag you away from him. I wanted you all to myself, which is why I acted so unprofessionally when I took you home that night.”

“Is that what you call it? Unprofessional?” she asked with a laugh, remembering the earth-shattering minutes in her kitchen.

“What would you call it?”

“Incredible. Amazing. Life changing.”

He brought her hand to his lips, and she suddenly realized she was no longer thinking about how to leave him. Rather, she was thinking about how she might try to keep him forever. “It was all those things for me and so much more. I thought about you all the time. I had no idea divorces could take so long.”

Tiffany’s mind raced as she tried to process what he’d said. He’d thought about her all the time. Her heart stood up to do a happy little dance at that news.
 

For a long time, he was silent, and then he curled a lock of her hair around his finger. “I know I’m not the easiest guy in the world to be with, but I hope you’ll be patient with me and give me a chance. I waited so long for you.”

While he hadn’t given her what she wanted, he gave her something else she hadn’t known she needed—hope.

“I’m not ready to go home yet,” Dan said as he drove Kara back to North Harbor.

“What do you want to do?”

“What is there to do around here?”

“Not much.” Kara was quiet for a minute before she said, “I know something we can do.”

“Sounds promising,” he said in his best suggestive tone. Dan knew it wasn’t wise to needle her, but he couldn’t seem to help it.

“Not
that
.”

“Oh, damn. Can’t blame a guy for being hopeful. What, then?”

“How about a ride on the Salt Pond?”

“In the dark?”

“You’re not afraid, are you?”

“Of course not, but how will you be able to see where we’re going?”

“I have exceptional night vision.”

“This I have to see.” A few minutes later, Dan parked in the lot at McCarthy’s and followed Kara to the floating dock where he got on first and held out a hand to help her aboard.
 

“I’m only allowing you to help me because I’m wearing a dress.”

“I’m only helping you because you’re wearing a dress.”

She tried to hold back a smile and failed, shaking her head at him.

Under the bright lights from the main pier, he watched her unlock the console and start the boat. After letting it warm up, she cast off the bowline and gestured for him to get the stern. The night was clear and very dark. Dan gazed up at a star-filled sky that got more spectacular the farther they got from the lighted docks.

“It’s quite something, huh?” she said from her post at the helm.

“Indeed. Something tells me this isn’t the first time you’ve been out here late at night.”

She shrugged. “I don’t sleep very well, so it’s something to do.”

Without thinking through the implications, he came up behind her and sat on the seat, urging her to lean back against him.

She immediately went rigid. “Um…”

“Relax,” he said. “I only want to keep you warm.”

“I’m not cold.”

Behind her, he smiled. He expected nothing less from her. “This way, you won’t get cold.”

She remained stiff and unyielding for several minutes before she gave in and leaned back against him.

Dan celebrated the victory silently as her hair whipped around his face. He gathered it into a ponytail and held back the urge to kiss the sweet curve of her neck where the straps of her dress came together in a single button that would be so easy to release.
 

“You’re getting awfully familiar,” she said.

The scent of her hair was driving him crazy. “Am I?”

“You know you are.”

“Is that so bad?”

“I haven’t decided yet.”

“Let me know when you make up your mind.”

“Dan—”

“Shhh. I’m trying to enjoy the ride.”

Even though he knew she had plenty to say, she stayed quiet as she navigated the boat to the far side of the vast pond. He was intrigued to realize it was rather easy to see once his eyes became accustomed to the dark. It took about twenty minutes to travel around the anchorage.

“Isn’t that your friend what’s-his-name’s boat?” Dan asked.

“Do you mean
Robert
?”

“So now you actually know his name?” He couldn’t believe how furious that made him.
 

“Of course I know his name. He asked me out.”

“You…he…he did?” Kara laughed softly, and he tugged on her hair. “Don’t laugh at me.”

“Why not? You’re funny.”

“So…what did you say?”

“To what?”

Dan wanted to growl with exasperation, but then he realized she was enjoying playing with him. He liked her playfulness, even if it was at his expense. “When he asked you out.”

“I told him I’d let him know.”

“What does that mean?”

“I wanted to see how tonight went before I gave him an answer.”

Dan reached around her and turned off the engine.
 

“Hey!” She turned to him, as he’d hoped she would. “You can’t do that!”

Remaining seated, Dan released her hair and reached up to put both hands on her face. When she tried to turn away from him, he resisted. “Don’t.”

For a charged moment, they stared at each other in the darkness, and then he drew her down to him, slowly but purposefully.

“Dan—”

“Shhh. I had no idea there was so much riding on this date. I have to make sure you don’t want to go out with anyone else.”

Their lips met softly, tentatively. He was careful to go slow when every cell in his body was urging haste. This, he reminded himself in a final moment of clarity, was her first kiss in years. He couldn’t screw it up by demanding too much too soon. For the longest time, he thought she wouldn’t respond, and then her lips moved against his. When it dawned on him that she was kissing him back, he slid one hand around to the back of her neck to keep her anchored as he tipped his head to the right to better align their lips.

She was so sweet, so careful and so wounded. He couldn’t forget that last part as he stood and drew her in closer to him. And then her arms came up to encircle his neck, and he wanted to whoop with joy. Rather than do that, he painted her bottom lip with gentle brushes of his tongue, hoping she’d take the hint and let him in.
 

As the water lapped against the hull of the boat, he teased and cajoled until her mouth opened and her tongue pressed against his. He wasn’t proud of the growl that escaped from him as he took her up on the invitation for more. As the kiss deepened, she pressed herself against him, making the small space between the seat and the console too tight to hide his growing arousal. Without breaking the kiss, he eased her out of the confined area and backed her up to the center seating area that also served as a cover for the boat’s life jackets.

She shocked the shit out of him when she tugged him down on top of her. Who was this girl and what had she done with shy, reserved Kara? Not that he was complaining, but he couldn’t help but wonder what had gotten into her.

With their bodies now tightly aligned, Dan could no longer hide the proof of what her sweet kisses were doing to him. He pressed against her and waited for her to push him away. Instead, her arms tightened around his neck and her lips became greedier.