Lorraine Heath (18 page)

Handing him the soap, she got up and without looking back went straight to bed. She lay on her side, watching the moonbeams ease in through the tiny cracks in the closed shutters. She pulled the covers up more closely about her, trying to stave off the chill of the room. She listened to Jake’s movements, tempted to roll over and watch him. She heard his wet feet hit the floor, conscious of his rapid movements as he dried off and slipped on his long Johns.

The bed dipped with his weight. She rolled over, snuggling up against him, his body bringing her warmth. There were moments when she was nestled within his embrace that she wanted more than his arms around her, craved more than the idle movements of his fingers up and down her back. His fingers stilled and she heard his deep rhythmic breathing. She closed her eyes until her breathing matched his.

The loud clamoring of iron against iron brought Rebecca and Jake out of a sound sleep and the words “Fire!” brought Jake out of bed. He threw his pants on.

“Stay put!” he shouted, pointing a finger at Rebecca. He grabbed his jacket and shoved his arms into it before he rushed out.

She slipped her feet out of the warm bed and set them on the icy floor. Her body swayed from side to side as she moved to the front door. She opened the door, fully intending to just stand there and watch, but then she saw the fire consuming the barn and Jake rushing in behind Zach to save the stock trapped inside. She released a bloodcurdling scream and tore out into the yard.

Someone stayed her progress, and she sought to control her panic by issuing orders to anyone within hearing distance. She had the men form a line and buckets of water were sent uselessly down it. She heaved the buckets alongside them, her eyes never leaving the barn as flames licked at the structure and shot upward towards the black heavens. The horses began galloping out. As far away from the structure
as she was, she could still feel the heat emanating from its core, searing anyone that came too close. She saw Jake and Zach both run out, wrapping water-drenched blankets around themselves and shouting directions to each other before storming back into the inferno.

The red-hot flames surrounded the two men as they huddled together trying to determine if any animals were left trapped inside the barn. A frantic neighing was heard in the distance, and Jake ran a quick list through his mind of all the animals he and Zach had released. Then without thought, he headed towards the rear of the barn. Abruptly, he was halted and spun around.

He felt as though his skin was blistering, his eyes were watering, and he knew he and Zach couldn’t stay inside much longer.

“Where are you going?” Zach shouted over the roar of the fire.

“Reb’s horse is the only one left! He’s in the back stall!”

“I’ll get him!” Zach said. “You head back out!” “It’s my responsibility!”

Zach jerked Jake until his head snapped. “Dammit! I don’t know why you don’t think she loves you! But she does and she needs you a hell of a lot more than she needs a damn horse! You never learned growing up that you have to obey your older brother, so you’re gonna learn now! Get the hell out of here, little brother, or I’ll carry you out and the horse can stay!”

Jake stared into eyes of brown, emotions running through him that conflicted with everything he’d known growing up.

“Leave the horse!” he yelled as he grabbed onto Zach’s coat. “Let’s just get the hell out of here!”

The roof to the barn began caving in, and burning beams began falling around them. Jake ducked down, throwing his arms over his head. When he stood back up, Zach was gone.

Jake stumbled out of the burning building. Bending at
the waist, bracing his arms against his knees, he inhaled deeply of the outside air, trying to force the smoky air out of his aching lungs.

When he straightened, he saw Reb coming towards him. Then she doubled over, and screamed. Jake ran towards her, catching her before she hit the ground. Another pain hit her before the first one left and she lifted fear-filled eyes up to his.

“Oh, God! The baby’s coming! He’s coming now!” she cried.

Jake scanned the area for someone he could trust.

“Frank! Make sure Zach got out!” he yelled. Then the barn, the fire, everything else was forgotten as he carried Rebecca into the house.

Gently, Jake laid Rebecca down on the bed as she doubled up, another pain hitting her. She grabbed his hand, squeezing hard.

“They’re coming so fast! Oh, God! It hurts!”

“Reb, honey, I gotta go scrub up. I’ll be right back. Just try to relax, honey.”

“But it’s too soon, Jake. After all this, I’m going to lose him.”

“No, you won’t. I promise, Reb. Everything’s going to be all right.”

He pulled his hand free and turned to go, stopping and rubbing her back as she doubled over on her side when the onslaught of pain caught her again. As soon as her breathing started slowing, he ran to the bowl of water and began to scrub his burned hands. Dammit! They thought they had three more weeks to get ready!

He pulled a sheet out of the chest and ripped it into pieces, tying one piece on each end of the bed, handing the cloths to her.

“Just pull on these when the pain comes,” he ordered. Then he lifted her gown and laid batting under her. He watched in wonder as her muscles visibly tightened and she clenched her jaw.

“Reb, honey, don’t hold it in. Scream. Scream all you want. I gotta see if his head is down. It might hurt, honey.”

“It hurts now, Jake.” And then she filled the house with a scream that escaped out into the night and startled the men who were still battling the fire.

“I can feel his head. He’s real low down. Next time, just push, honey. Bear down and push. It’s going to be all right, Reb.”

His voice was soothing and calm, his hands gently rubbing her stomach, and for a minute she almost believed him. Then an unbearably hard contraction hit her, followed rapidly by another. When she thought she could stand it no longer, it subsided. She opened her tear-filled eyes and between the valley of her raised knees, she saw Jake smiling.

“What the hell are you smiling at, Burnett?” she snarled.

He looked at her with innocence. “I can see his head. He’s got black hair.”

“Black hair?” she asked in a softened tone.

“He’s almost here, honey.”

Then the pain gripped her again, even more intense than before, and she slipped into blissful blackness. She felt as though she were swimming through a dark tunnel, and at the end a tiny wailing sound was calling her. Painstakingly, she opened her eyes. Jake was hovering over her, cradling a tiny bundle in his strong, protective arms.

“We have a son, Reb,” he said in a quiet voice as he laid the child on her chest.

Her fingers lightly brushed the dark hair as she studied the crinkled face. How odd, she thought, that we start life so wrinkled and end it the same way.

In wonder she said, “He looks just like—” She stopped herself from saying Brett, for the boy did look just like his father. “Just perfect,” she amended.

“I’ll clean him up as soon as I’ve taken care of you,” Jake said. Her body expelled the afterbirth. He washed her, padded her, and changed the bedding without moving her from the bed. The entire time, she admired her perfect son, touched the five tiny fingers on each of his hands, his ten curled-up toes, the faint brows over his eyes, the hair that already promised to be thick and full. Jake helped her slip into a clean, soft gown, and then he took the baby to clean
him up. Rebecca closed her eyes, Jake’s words echoing through her mind, “We have a son.”

He brought the clean, sleeping infant back to her. “He’s more presentable now, but he fell asleep. Guess it was hard work for him, too. Do you want to hold him?”

She reached out her arms. “Just for a minute.”

He gave the sleeping child to his mother and Rebecca’s eyes fell on Jake’s hands.

“Oh! Your hands!”

“Bad night to have a fire.”

“Bring me the salve and dressing.”

“I’ll be all right.”

“Do it, Jake Burnett!”

It hurt like hell to carry the jar of salve and the dressing to her. She sat up and laid the baby down on the bed, gently taking Jake’s hand in her own.

“How in the world did you manage to deliver a baby?” she wailed.

“Actually, they didn’t start hurting until I stopped.”

She applied the salve and lightly wrapped his hands, wincing as she did so, knowing he was doing the same. She wondered how the hell he could not help feeling pain while he was delivering the baby. And how many times had she squeezed his hand?

When she was done, he laid the baby in his cradle and tucked Rebecca into bed before returning outside to herald the good news and assess the damages done by the fire.

Rebecca was surprised she couldn’t sleep. After all she’d been through, she thought she’d fall into a deep slumber and never wake up. From time to time, her eyes caressed the sleeping infant, finding it difficult to believe the little mound that had been her belly was that beautiful child who was now part of her world. Already, she could not remember what it was like not to have him in her life. She heard the door open and waited for Jake to come to her. When he didn’t, she eased herself out of the bed. He was sitting on the couch, head back, eyes closed.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

His eyes snapped open. “You should be in bed.”

“So should you.”

“I thought you’d be more comfortable if I slept here,” he said.

“Well, you thought wrong. Come to bed.” “In a while.”

The woefulness in his voice caused her to sit down. “What happened?”

Jake sighed. How could he tell her? How could he explain not only what had happened but how he was feeling about it? He released a ragged sigh, sorrow-filled eyes turned her way. “Zach didn’t make it out.”

Raising herself up onto her knees, she drew him against her bosom, her arms encircling him, tears filling her eyes.

“I’m so sorry, Jake,” she said quietly. “It wasn’t your fault. When you came out of the barn, the flames were already too high for anyone else to go back in.”

His arms came around her, squeezing tightly. “I didn’t want to like him, Reb. But I did. We were just beginning to know each other, to come to an understanding about the past.”

“How do you think the fire got started?”

“I’d bet my life Ethan started it.”

“Life’s little ironies. He started it to destroy one brother and ended up destroying the other.” She raked her fingers through his hair. “Come to bed, hold me, let me hold you.”

They lay in each other’s arms, mindful not to hurt each other, listening to the soft breathing of their son.

“What do you think I should name him?” Rebecca asked in the stillness of the night.

“Thought you might want to name him after his father.”

“I’d like that,” she said, as tears of happiness mingled with the tears of sadness brought on by Zach’s death. Jake Burnett was the most unselfish man she had ever known. “We’ll call him Jacob. Jacob Burnett.”

Jake was hurting, emotionally and physically, and he was exhausted. He stared at her in wonder.

“You’re going to name him after me?”

“I don’t see any other father in this house.”

Ignoring the pain throbbing in his hands, he drew her
close, holding onto her tightly. It was the most precious gift she could have given him.

The meager group of scruffy men looked up from the campfire they were huddled around, the overcast sky adding to the dreariness. Ethan unfolded his body and sauntered confidently over to the rider who had dared to enter their midst.

“Where’s your men? Or did you come to your senses and decide to leave this state?”

Jake studied the man. As much as he disliked him, he took no pleasure in bringing him the news.

“Someone torched our barn last night.”

Ethan gave the man a knowing sneer, pleased to take note of the burns on his hands. “And I guess you came to accuse me of the wrongdoing?”

Jake shook his head and sighed. “No. I came to tell you that Zach died helping me get the livestock out of the barn.”

Ethan stumbled back as though someone had rammed a hardened fist into his chest.

“I’ve set aside some land. Thought we’d bury him there tomorrow. Seemed appropriate since your father bought the land. If you prefer to bury him somewhere else—”

Ethan turned away, walking past his men and the fire, walking until he was surrounded by emptiness. Then he dropped to his knees and railed against the forces that had destroyed the only person left in the world who he had loved.

The small, somber group gathered around the grave, the men standing with their hats in their hands, giving the only thing they had left to give, their deepest respect.

Ethan rode up and without a word dismounted and took his place opposite Jake. His eyes bore into Jake during the minister’s recitation. When the minister closed his Bible, he looked between the two men, wondering who would throw the handful of dirt onto the wooden casket that had been lowered into the cold ground.

“You do it,” Ethan snarled. “You’re the reason he’s dead.”

Before anyone could respond to the accusation, Rebecca stepped forward, picked up a handful of dirt and dropped it on the casket. “Good-bye, Zach,” she whispered. “I’m glad Jake had you.” Then she stepped back and slipped her arm around Jake, leading him away, the other mourners following, leaving Ethan to bear his grief alone beside the gaping hole.

The bunkhouse had been cleared to provide room for all the food the thoughtful neighbors had brought. Rebecca and Jake walked to the house where someone had offered to watch the sleeping babe while they attended the funeral. When they entered, they saw that the woman had been replaced by Carrie. A large smile crossed her face as she turned to them. She immediately trudged over to Jake and threw her arms around him.

“I know this is a sad occasion, but there’s still reason for rejoicing. You done good, boy. You got one handsome son.”

Jake worked his way out of Carrie’s embrace. “We’re proud of him,” he said. “And with good reason.”

Jake left to accept condolences from the mourners, and Rebecca picked up her son. Carrie watched her as she sat down to nurse him.