Lost Her (Lost #1) (4 page)

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Authors: Ginger Sharp

BOOK: Lost Her (Lost #1)
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We started dating and sealed my fate with marriage to her about 3 years later since she became pregnant. We shared an apartment together at law school and we were very rarely ever apart. It was the right choice; she was the right choice.

 

Then my memories brought me back to that day when I arrived to the hospital for Briar’s accident. I see Livi sitting in a closed off waiting room through the glass on the door. Again covered in blood with a blank stare with small sobs and a nurse grabbed me by my arm.

“I am sorry, we had to sedate her. She would not let go of the body,” the nurse said sternly as if Livi was a problem. Then it dawned on me that Briar is gone. I was so bitterly angry with Livi and her defying my rules. I just left her at the hospital without even going to her. I drove for hours until I ran out of gas. I wish I could take it all back; she was not as strong as I thought. She needed me, but I just could not get over my arrogant self. I have a lot to make up for.

 

All those months of fighting and counseling could not help us until I said those words to her. That I wanted a divorce, completely out of anger, but my words hit her like shard
s of glass falling on her, piercing through her. I left the house in fear that more garbage would come out of my mouth that Christmas night. I knew I need to cool down, but when I came back home a few days later she was gone. Now I was feeling more pain than just a loss of a child, but my love had left me and I was to blame.

 

I hear snap of fingers and then Rosalie’s voice, “Ryan, are you a daydreamer because you were just missing in action.”

I snap my head to look at her, “Nah, I was just thinking is all.”

“Well you should head for the beach. The children will be playing fútbol soon,” she spoke with that wise old owl smirk on her straight lips.

“Ah yes, thank you,” as I run off toward the beach. Once I get to the water’s edge, I walk back a few feet and take off my shirt and slip off my flip flops. I place the shirt on my flip flops and run toward the water
diving in to cool down. The water is so warm and blue. All I need is my floaty tube and a cold beer, just like when we go on vacation. Livi always packs me a floatation device of some sort for vacations that she purchases on clearance from Wal-Mart and stock piles them in the dining room closet. She is always thinking ahead and now I wonder if she has any of the rafts floats at her house. If I am here for a few weeks, I might as well enjoy myself. If I am going to stay permanently, I have to figure out how to get internet to Livi’s house and maybe the Cantina too. We need to be better able to communicate with family if Katie needs us.

 

My thoughts come back to me again as I keep swimming and diving down to pick up shells and rocks. I come up to the surface and I can hear children’s laughter, so the kids must be outside playing soccer or whatever they call it here. I decide to stay in the water a little longer since it is so refreshing. I am treading water, looking toward the beach when I see a soccer ball coming rolling down to the water’s edge. I guess that is my cue to get out and go see my wife. I come out of the water and bend over to pick up the soccer ball. I am heading up the embankment toward the makeshift soccer field and I see Surfer Boy running up to me for the ball.

“Ay man, I see you are all wit and you have my fútbol,” he says with a smile.

“What is wit and yes, I have your soccer ball,” I spoke in a correcting manner.

“Wit, you know from the water,” he chuckled back to
me.

“Oh wet, I got you now,” I laughed back at him.

“You need lotion, you be turning all rit,” and I look at him all confused and he continued to speak, “All rit, your burning and I have lotion up here. Come follow.” Gosh, I think to myself what a confusing guy. I do better with the Spanish then I do with the Surfer Boy’s accent from where ever he is from. “Olivia tells me you were some Fútbol star goal tender back home and it helped you go to school for free. Totally wicked man and if you are willing maybe you can assist the wee ones with their skill drills,” he looks at me with a smile.

“Yes, I was on a special soccer, hockey and academic scholarship and I sure can help out,” I replied back to him thinking to myself that I love hearing the fact that Livi was bragging about her athletic husband.

 

Livi
- I see Ryan following behind Parker up from the beach. It looks like they are both smiling. Ah, maybe the tension will release if these guys could get along. Parker cornered me today for a brief moment while the students were grabbing their lunches from the cubbies and wanted to know what this meant with Ryan tracking me down.

“Did he tell you why he came last night?” Parker looks at me with a cautious smile.

“No, he was too drunk to get anything out of him last night,” I grin back at him before turning back into my classroom to have lunch with my students.

 

I was happy, no, extremely thrilled to see Ryan making an effort to fit in. He has some skills that I think the children would enjoy learning as I watched him set up cones with Parker. Some male bonding time for those two men while they co-coached the children would be great. I think to myself to see if I can get away and grade some papers over at the Cantina. I call out to the guys while I start hugging my students’ goodbye, “Would you mind if I took off? I had to attend to someone’s drunken state last night and I am behind on grading papers. When you are done, just head over to the Cantina,” I yelled out and waved. I got the return wave from Parker with a nod.

 

I run back into the school and grab my work. I head over to the Cantina. Once I walk up the steps I take notice that there is no Señor Marquis sitting at the bar. Wow, I find that extremely odd. I pull out a bar stool and plant myself on the seat. Rosalie appears from the back kitchen with her welcoming smile. I jump to the question, “Where is Señor Marquis?”

Rosalie smiles as she hands me an Imperial beer of which she knows I have become really fond. “Silly man took a job from your cocky scowling man doing a project.”

I look at her concerned at first, but knowing Ryan he most likely threw some money at him to make him stop bothering him, “Yes, cocky sounds like Ryan and you need to add arrogant to the description,” I chuckle out.

“I must ask, where he is,” Rosalie said hesitantly as she looks back toward the beach.

I laugh at her concern and offer the answer, “Parker and Ryan are teaching the children fútbol skills.”

She looks wearily at me and nods with a smile, “I guess that man did listen to my warning and is depositing his jealously in the garbage.” I nod in agreement with her and she continues to tell me, “Ryan is getting up early tomorrow and going to the market with me. It will be
nice to have muscle other than Señor Marquis. You know Señor runs off to talk to the pretty ladies and leaves me to load the truck.”

We are both laughing and I have to confirm what I heard, “So Ryan has offered to go to market with you? That is a step I never thought he would do, shopping. Maybe it is better than him waiting around all day for me, so he can see the country. That really sounds good.”

“Since he took Señor Marquis from me, I need the muscle and you know it is not best to drive alone,” she replied with a huge smile and she continued, “Since it is Parker’s birthday, would you like me to pick him up something for you? I know you will not being able to get him anything before the trip this weekend to National Park. He has been so excited and has been rambling about it all week.”

I place my hand over my mouth in disbelief that I forgot and what am I going to do with Ryan. I still have not discussed anything with Ryan as why he is here and what his plans are being here in Costa Rica. I felt panic wash over me since I do not like making Ryan angry nor do I like to let my friends down. Rosalie looks at me, “Did you forget?”

“Yes, I completely have forgotten my plans. I am overcome with Ryan showing up. What am I going to do now?” I say in a state of confusion.

Rosalie offers up a solution, “Buy Parker a few shots tonight and I will plant a seed in his head to invite Ryan for Saturday.” I laugh at her solution and it does seem logical. I now am more than sure she does not know about that small moment Parker and I had the other night. Then Rosalie looks at me, “I hope you are not
confused.” Shit, she knows.

Damn Parker with his chatter box mouth and I reply, “No, I love Ryan. If he wants to adapt to my new life that I have made for myself like he was saying all slurring out last night when he was drunk. Then yes, I will have him back. Or I mean he takes me back.”

She smiles at me brightly, “I really do not think you will have a problem with him reconciling. Maybe adapting.” We both let out laughs that we stifle back when we see Ryan and Parker climbing the stairs to the bar.

I turn back to Rosalie and whisper, “Señor Marquis fixed the steps. I did not even hear them coming up the steps.”

“No,” Rosalie points to Ryan, “He fixed them, he was bored.” I smile at her and then back at Ryan for his willingness to stepping up to help Rosalie with some of her Cantina maintenance issues.

 

Ryan saunters over to the bar and sits next to me. He reaches over to grab the back on my bar stool and pulls me closer to him. I was startled by his action, but I do not know why. He has been doing that to me since the first day I went for pizza with him at college. My mind drifts back to when we went to Brother Bruno’s and sat at a table. Instead of moving his chair closer to me, he pulls my chair over to him. I always remembering that I found it odd and rude, but over the years I got used to that as well as him taking food off my plate without asking. This man has always been quirky and never really polite, just arrogant! He has always acted like he was God’s gift to all and most people agreed with his attitude. The only time Ryan was not cocky was around my family. With them he acted like a studious athlete with the utmost politeness. I think he was afraid that my father and brothers would take him out back and shoot him if he screwed up with me.

 

Now, I think about Rosalie’s idea to get Parker buzzed to invite Ryan to his get together this weekend. Rosalie is a smart woman and I love her for always watching out for me. She has always been welcoming to me and she just took me under her wing when I arrived. I only know a little about her. I know that she is from Brazil and she married an American. Moved to the States where she attended college, achieved a PhD and then divorced. Then, she married a Costa Rican Fútbol star who died in a high speed crash in California. She traveled the world on his life insurance payout and then settled here to be near his family. Rosalie never had children of her own, but she sure makes every child in this town feel like they have a second mother. She is truly a Mother Teresa.

 

I come out of thought by Ryan snapping his fingers in front of my face. Typical Ryan, I think to myself. “What? What,” I ask looking at him as if he just shook me awake. He puts his elbows on the bar and leans in to me looking at me with concern in his eyes, “Are you doing alright in that mind of yours?”

I knew exactly where he was going with that question, “I am fine. I am doing just great!” I smile back at him to give him reassurance that I was not digressing back into my grief stricken self. He looks me right in the eyes with his perfect green eyes as if he was trying to read my thoughts.

“Good, I see you were drinking beers and I know how sometimes the alcohol does not play nice with your emotions. Makes you think too much, you know!” I just nod yes while I am still engaged in a stare into his eyes. I always loved his long shimmering black eye lashes against those perfect green eyes; they would send shivers down to my heart and warm the depths of my stomach.

 

I look up to Rosalie with a big smile, “Shots for the bar.” She nods and starts pouring.

“Do you think that is a good idea after the state I was in yesterday?” Ryan whispers in my ear.

I look at him and wink, “Rosalie, vodka for this one here since tequila is not very nice to him.” Rosalie then takes Ryan’s tequila shot pushing it in front of Parker.

“Whoa, I got two. I must have been a very good boy,” Parker says with a nod. Rosalie put Ryan’s shot down in front of him.

I lift up my glass, “To the almost birthday boy, my friend Parker.” We all swig back our shots. Ryan looks at me with a grimace. I wonder what that is about. Then I see Rosalie lean into Parker speaking with him about his birthday weekend and friends that will soon be arriving. I look over to see Parker getting all excited speaking about the details as Rosalie pours him another shot of tequila. I was smiling big at Parker about to join in with questioning him about the plans when I see Ryan staring at me with piercing eyes. I laugh out at Ryan who has this jealous glare and I touch his knee running my finger in a circle. Ryan’s glare softened up. I lean with one elbow on the bar and speak over to Parker. “What time is everyone leaving on Saturday to go up to the park? I just can’t wait; it will be some much fun.” Ryan grabs my hand still from circling on my knee and squeezes it pretty hard. I do not even offer any emotion or play into Ryan being mad.

Parker speaks up after downing another shot, “What time do you think you and Ryan will be ready to roll?” Bingo, there is the inclusion that we needed and I wink at Rosalie.

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