Love and Decay, Kane's Law (7 page)

She whirled around and pinned me with a
glare, “If you hurt them, I will kill you.”

I felt that annoying need to smile again, so
I deflected with some sarcastic humor, “So many threats.” I lifted
my gaze from her wiggling fingers and fell into the dark brown
depths of her rich, enchanting eyes. In that moment there was a
transfer of power so affecting I felt my knees buckle. She held it
all, she’d taken it from me… stolen it. I knew that I was a
possessive person, plagued by the need to control, the overwhelming
desire to govern everything around me. But now, in this infinite
minute while Reagan held me in her gaze, it was her that possessed
me. And not the other way around.

When I came back to myself, regained some of
my scattered senses and shook off the perplexity of this girl, I
felt the immediate need to raise my defenses and protect what was
left of me. “If you hurt me, I will kill them,” I told her. She
blanched at my threat but even I didn’t understand everything it
encompassed. Hurt me how? Physically, of course. Emotionally? Did
she hold that power? Yes. She did. And if she could wound me deeper
than the skin, than how strong was her reign over me. I’d known her
a few hours.

I’d spoken with her barely at all.

This couldn’t be healthy.

But I hadn’t been healthy for years now. I
could be honest with myself about that. And instead of her feeding
the sickness that coiled around my bones and sunk into my nerves
and veins, she seemed to soothe those dark pieces of me, heal the
damaged, suffocating parts that I wanted to pretend didn’t
exist.

“Why are you doing this?” she asked- sounding
truly scared for the first time today.

My jaw clenched in frustration and I
swallowed back a biting remark. I was experiencing something real
and authentic between us and she cowered in fear of me? Didn’t she
understand what it meant for us to meet each other? Didn’t she
understand that both of our lives had collided into this necessary
moment in time and now our paths were drastically altered? Couldn’t
she see what I offered her? How much I would give up to keep her
safe? To keep her with me?

I stalked past her, too angry to give her a
calm answer. “You need to stay by my side,” I threw over my
shoulder. With her I knew I needed to hammer in the point, so I
added, “At all times.”

She hurried to catch up with me and her
immediate obedience soothed some of my furious edges.

I led her through town, knowing the sight of
a functioning society would be a shock to her. But I hoped it also
quieted some of her fears. This place was not just better than the
road, it was better than anything else out there. We weren’t the
society we’d left behind before the infection, but we managed. And
lived like kings compared to the rest of the world. She’d be a fool
not to see that.

I noticed her gawking at the rooftop guards.
“If you try to run, Reagan, they will shoot you.” She needed to
understand our settlement and what we expected of her. Although, I
left out what my father would do to her if they didn’t shoot her,
if they caught her instead and my father had time to pass judgment
on her. She would view the hallway trophy cases in an entirely
different light then. I decided one scary revelation at a time.

“The threat against my friends was clear
enough, Kane.”

I liked that. “We have men everywhere, all
over the town and all over the surrounding forests. We live in
relative peace and quiet here because we exterminate the threat of
Zombies before they ever reach us. Our people live in houses and
participate in civilized society. My father is reclaiming this
country for us. Every day we clear more land, claim more property
for humanity.”

She seemed to absorb that information and let
it roll around her head. Finally she asked, “Do you use
currency?”

“We trade work for necessities,” I told her.
“Work earns you credits, credits buy you whatever you need or want.
The more you work, the more you have. The same goes for housing.
The job you choose determines the kind of housing you own. It
determines your status in the community. It decides how much
influence you have in meetings.”

Reagan fell silent then, no doubt
contemplating our society. I offered the obligatory greeting to
everyone we came into contact with but didn’t offer to introduce
Reagan. A bizarre kind of greed had settled over me and I hated the
idea of sharing her with anyone- even random citizens on the
street. I knew they would never take her from me. I had the second
highest level of respect in our community- maybe third, if you
counted my mother. But, still, some quiet whisper of instinct urged
me to keep her tucked close to my side, keep an ever watchful eye
on this impulsive girl.

When we neared my house, she asked, “What’s
top of the food chain?”

“I don’t know what you mean.” I looked down
at her and couldn’t help but smile. We were almost home.

“Best job, what is it? Who gets the best
house? The most food? The most votes?” Her eyes were inquisitive
but her jawline still hard. I wanted to ease her agitation, take
away some of her apprehension.

Confidently, I said, “My father.”

That didn’t make her happy. “And then?” she
pressed.

“Soldiers.” I wondered if that would make her
feel more protected. “Anyone who patrols gets the best of
everything. We risk our lives to keep peace.”

“Well, that’s what I want to be then.” Her
rich brown eyes were intent with her decision. She was serious.

Ridiculous but serious.

She’d been given too much freedom, kept too
loosely. She was an asset here, a precious commodity. We didn’t
need her to be a disposable soldier, we had plenty of them. I
needed her in my home, keeping my house, making my meals and
warming my bed. Was that sexist? Sure. Fine, absolutely. But we all
had our strengths. I played to mine every single day. Risked my
life to give people like her safety and security. Now,
specifically, I would do those things for
her
. She had a
different role to play.

But her part was invaluable in my life.
Absolutely vital now that I found her.

“You can’t be a soldier, Reagan. Only our men
fill those rolls.”

“And then women remain co-dependent on their
protection and abundant supplies? I forgot that you own your women
here; they are as much property as they are people, right?” Her
tone was biting, ripping into me with her sharp teeth and
unforgiving tongue.

“It doesn’t have to be that way,” I assured
her. But what I didn’t say was that the co-dependency went both
ways. She would be reliant on me to provide for her, to keep her
safe. And I would be bound to her because of the way she brought
light into my life, stroked my soul with her grace and warmth,
slowed the demons that hunted my mind, nipping at my ankles with
their forked tongues, licking my back with the burning whip of
their claws. She took all of that away and brought me peace. In the
first moment I saw her that was true. We were far beyond a
one-sided relationship. I needed her as much as she would need
me.

More so.

We’d stopped in front of my house and I was
anxious to show her inside. I was proud of my place. As unforgiving
and ugly as this world could be, this was my home- the only
sanctuary I could truly be myself.

She wasn’t ready to let this go though. “But
it is,” she argued with me. “This is your house. I’m your
ration?”

I turned toward her, needing her to see the
truth in my words. “Prize,” I promised her. “You’re my prize.”

Tears welled in her eyes and for some reason
that made me feel like the worst kind of bastard. “You’re crazy if
you think I would ever go along with this.”

Crazy.

I
hated
that word.

It should make me angry, furious with her…
But instead I felt oddly vulnerable. My chest ached unexplainably,
my gut twisted and worst of all my confidence failed me. I had to
look away from her piercing gaze. She saw too much of me.

I reached for her hand, not trusting my voice
to explain. I tugged her up the neat walkway and the idyllic little
stairs. I unlocked my door and led her inside the home I’d
carefully built.

Of course, it had been here since the
beginning of the infection, but ever since it had been given to me
I’d worked hard to make it my own.

I watched Reagan take in my space with an
excitement that was new to me. I studied her eyes as they grew big
with wonder and her lips as they relaxed for the first time all
day. Her shoulders lost their tension and her fingers stopped
wiggling. She liked my home. I could feel it; I could see it in her
face.

A quiet, unfamiliar feeling unfurled inside
my chest. The emotion grew slowly, spreading out through my legs
and arms, wrapping around my heart and lungs and sliding up my
throat and to my head, making me feel dizzy with the increasing
intensity of the moment.

Hope.

Reagan’s reaction had made me feel hope.

And then a cold kind of panic flashed in her
bright eyes and I immediately sought to erase it. “It will be
easier for you if you stop fighting this,” I promised her, hoping
to draw out those feelings of belonging she’d felt only moments
ago.

She whirled on me. “I’m not sleeping with
you.”

Not yet, I thought.

“Nobody said you had to. You can stop
believing I’m a monster, Reagan. I’m not.”
Please stop thinking
I’m a monster. Please see something that nobody else sees.
The
desperation in my own thoughts shocked me and then Reagan’s next
words nearly shattered me.

“Then let me go,” she demanded levelly.

Didn’t she know that I couldn’t? I was in too
deep. “I won’t do that.”

“Wont?” She raised one eyebrow and pinned me
with a disbelieving glare.
“I won’t let you go,” I confessed. I still felt the sting of her
hatred and it made me open up in ways I usually guarded myself
from. Truth fell from my lips before I could stop myself, “You’re
perfect for me. And you’re mine now. I won’t lose you.”

She shook her head, her lush, dark hair
bounced around her shoulders. “You don’t even know me. I’m a raging
bitch.”

I shrugged. That was part of her appeal. I
loved her spunk, her feistiness.

“I would make a terrible wife… uh, partner,
um, possession. I won’t ever be submissive; I won’t ever
not
fight you.”

But that’s what I was counting on. “You’re
jumping to conclusions.” I smirked at her. I needed her boldness,
her defiance. She would keep me entertained, keep me from growing
bored. She was my ultimate challenge. “Don’t you want to get
settled before you warn me off?”

“No. I want you out of my life today.”

“Not happening. This is the best thing that
could have happened to you. Stop looking at this like a tragedy and
recognize your good fortune.” I was starting to lose my patience. I
wanted her to accept her situation and then fight me. She could
argue and sass but after she realized she was staying with me.
Permanently.

“And my friends?” she demanded.

What I wanted to do was scream at her to
forget her friends! Instead, I said, “Will be safe and taken care
of as long as you remember your place.”

She made a laughing sound that didn’t sound
amused. “And if I don’t?”

That made me angrier than anything else. All
of my good humor drained from my body. “Don’t find out.”

We stared at each other for only a moment,
while the intensity and fierce emotions rushed around us in a
hypnotizing pull. A knock on my door ripped us from our mutual
stupor and I left the depth of her eyes as if it were a different
realm entirely. I sighed, frustrated with the intruder’s timing,
but left Reagan to recover from our interaction.

I knew I was getting to her. I could feel her
resolve fading into the promise of a new life with me.

I peered through the blurred glass pane into
the distorted profile of my sister on the other side.

Tyler.

What did she want?

I pulled the door open and stared her down
through the screen door. She stared back, as ever, unafraid of my
position here or my reputation. She was a force of her own.
Reckless, impetuous, hotheaded, spoiled and unfeeling.

The list could go on, but I had the
unsettling feeling she could read my thoughts as she stared up at
me. Her expression was nothing but cold indifference and boredom.
If anyone could go against my father and win, it was my little
sister.

But she never would.

Not head to head anyway.

She would rip his heart out when she
abandoned his idea of utopia though. He trusted her to get her shit
together before she did something stupid, like leave this Colony
with notions of living out there on her own- or worse, with Miller.
But I knew better.

My sister was minutes from bolting. I could
see it in her flighty eyes, in her jumpiness, in the way her hands
trembled slightly when she thought no one was paying attention to
her.

She was as good as gone.

“Tyler,” I sighed. “What do you want?”

“Just stopped by to meet your new pet.” She
sounded like her old self- the one that was cheer captain of our
high school and organized her junior prom all on her own. Something
was most definitely up with her.

I leaned into the door, not entirely sure I
wanted to share this time with Reagan. I understood Tyler’s
curiosity, but these first few moments were vital to establishing a
relationship with Reagan. I felt reluctant to give those up.

“She’s not a pet,” I said.

“Really?” Tyler laughed but there was no
humor in it. Her eyes narrowed and her lips pursed. Here we go…
“Let’s see, you went hunting in the forest this morning and then
returned with a creature that you’re keeping locked in your house.
If she’s not a pet, then what is she?”