Love Inspired Suspense January 2014 (72 page)

The hum of her cell phone vibrated from the deck rail.

Josh nodded slowly, then braced his hands on his chair and heaved himself up. “You're right.” He took a deep breath. “You should answer that.” He passed her phone to her as he went back to his grill.

Andrea watched him go, then brushed her fingers across the screen. What little warmth Josh had left with her vanished when she saw what was there. “Josh.”

He was by her side before her next breath, and she turned the screen to face him so he could see it.

The picture of them, through the same rifle scope, embracing not five minutes ago. A text followed.

Nowhere is safe until you stop talking.

EIGHT

J
osh shoved away from his kitchen table and stretched, rubbing the back of his neck as he yawned. His navy blue T-shirt stretched tight across his abs.

Andrea caught herself looking and turned her gaze back to the contents of the folder spread out on the table in front of her. The police had, once again, come and gone, with the official word that the cell phone being used to taunt her was a prepaid bought with cash in Atlanta. The MAC address of the machine that had pinged her printer was a dead end, as well. Far from being afraid, Andrea was weary with watching over her shoulder.

Fighting the urge to look twice at the man on the other side of the table, she kept unseeing eyes fastened on the page before her. Exhaustion and stress didn't make for a very sound mind, and Andrea wasn't sure she'd be able to control the filter on her mouth if she let her thoughts wander to past feelings. The way he'd backed off after their talk on the deck hadn't cooled that kiss. Neither had that photo.

Oblivious to her thoughts, Josh stood, snagging his mug on his index finger and reaching for hers. “Want a refill?”

“It's getting too late for caffeine.”

“You've had four cups and another stalker photo. You really think one more cup is going to tip the scale?”

Andrea bit back a smile as she pulled a piece of paper from the scattered stack in front of her and held it up. The edges fluttered as though a breeze blew through the room, betraying her shaking fingers. “Does it look like I need more stimulants?”

“Water it is. No wonder you left the army. You couldn't keep up with the caffeine intake.”

“My discharge papers indicate failure to raise my blood pressure to unsafe levels.” Light conversation felt so much better than drugs and threats. She wanted to hug him for playing along.

Josh disappeared behind her as she bent her head over the pages. Her focus vanished as she listened to him refill the coffeepot. Just knowing he was there did something to her heart rate that she couldn't blame on caffeine. Sleep had to come soon. Otherwise, she'd spill out every daydream she'd ever had about him.

The thud of glass on wood raised her head. “Thanks.”

“Sure thing.” He settled into his chair, the remains of the last pot of coffee nearly spilling over as he took a cautious sip. “So...” He set down his mug and motioned toward the papers he'd read. “I've got nothin'.”

She agreed. “There's nothing in my files but notes about sessions. To anyone but me, these are worthless.”

“Talk to me about Cameron.” Josh slid his coffee mug back and forth between his hands, absorbed in the motion. “Maybe hearing it out loud will help.”

It seemed like a waste of time, but what else did they have? Andrea sat back and tilted her head from side to side, stretching too-tight neck muscles. “To be honest, he was a textbook case.” She looked up to find Josh studying her with an unreadable look. It took a minute for her flustered mind to draw back to the conversation. “Terrible childhood. Dad drank. Mom did drugs. Wade was taken out of the home when he was in first grade. He bounced around in the foster system until he joined the army.”

“Where are his parents?”

“Dad was killed in a car accident. Mom is in prison in Nevada. He tried to see her before he deployed but she refused. She blames him for the family being torn apart.”

Josh sniffed and set his coffee cup on the table so hard the dark liquid sloshed over the edge. “Spoken like a true addict. It's everyone else's fault.” He swiped at the dark drops on the wood tabletop. “At least Wade learned to take responsibility for his actions. I've never once heard that kid blame anyone else for his troubles.”

“Until last night.” The voice that squeaked from Andrea's throat was meek. Stealing drugs was stupid, but it didn't cut Andrea like his relapse did.

Josh drummed his finger against the edge of the table. The tapping continued until Andrea wanted to slap her hand down over his, but just when she was about to give in to the urge, he stopped. “Maybe we're coming at this from the wrong direction.”

“Meaning?”

“He said he put something in, not that he said something to you. Besides, I think you'd remember Cameron saying, ‘Hey, Doc, I stole drugs from some guys and here are their names.'”

“The bad guys don't know that. I'm sure they think he's done just that and I hold the proof. And him putting something in a file wouldn't have them pushing me to close my doors.”

“Okay, how about this.” He sat up like he'd suddenly thought of the answer. “Who has access to your files?”

“Just me. And Grace. Even though we have release forms like the one Wade signed for you, I've never had anyone ask.” She slid the file closer and shut it to look at the outside, then flipped it open again, the attached patient data sheets flopping against the cover. “It's a pretty simple system. Grace keys the patient data into the computer and passes everything back to me. Unless there's a change, it never—” Andrea stopped, eyes narrowing as she stared at the pages attached to the folder.

“What?”

“We're looking at this all wrong.” She flattened her palm against Wade's handwriting on the patient information page, which was clipped securely into the front of the folder. “You're right. He said it was something he did.”

Eyebrow arched, Josh leaned closer.

“We thought it was weird he changed the forms so you could see his file.” She flipped sheets until she found the one she was looking for.

Josh got up and came around the table, slipping into the seat next to hers.

With effort, she focused on the page and not on his arm brushing hers. “He crossed out his foster father's name and wrote yours. Why didn't Grace give him a clean sheet to fill out? Based on the fact he scratched this out and wrote your name in, she handed him the entire folder.” She reached for her phone, which lay beneath a stack of session notes. “I'm calling her. Maybe she remembers—”

“Andrea.” Josh pressed her hand against the table. “It's after two. Grace is on vacation and would probably appreciate it if you waited a few hours to make that call.”

Heat raced up her arm. For the smallest moment, she let herself enjoy the contact, then slipped her hand from beneath his. “Not quite thinking clearly.”

Josh didn't respond for a second, then reached over and slid the folder closer. He flipped through each sheet, mumbling. “Name, address, medical history... My guess is your hulking friend is scared you know something you don't.”

“Well, leave no stone unturned.” Andrea popped the metal brackets and slipped the papers free. “You take the top three and I'll take...” The thought died as she caught sight of scrawled words between the brackets, where the sheets had been clamped to the folder. “Found it.”

Josh laid an arm across the back of her chair and leaned near to read over her shoulder.

She swallowed hard against the closeness and read the scrawled words out loud. “Third wall locker from showers. Bottom panel loose. Don't talk. Office bugs.” She stiffened her neck to avoid meeting Josh's gaze way too close to hers. “He left a maintenance request in his file?”

Josh took the folder from her. “That kid is a genius.”

“What?” Andrea knew she was tired, but now she felt like she was having a riddle-filled conversation with the Cheshire Cat. Sure enough, a slow smile spread across Josh's face.

“He's smarter than we've been giving him credit for.” Josh slipped his arm from her chair and paced to the window, staring out into the darkness. “Nobody's using those wall lockers in the unit. He's just blessed we haven't ripped them out since he wrote this. Whatever is going on, this is his insurance.”

Light dawned, and Andrea had to admit Josh was right. She'd always known Wade was a smart kid, but the genius label might just work. “He changed his file because he knew you'd eventually see it. You're one of the only people he knows who'd understand what it meant.”

“Yep.” Josh turned around to lean against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest.

“But why not just tell you? And why not tell you last night?”

“If anything happened to him, he knew somebody would look into his file and call me. My guess is he didn't know he was in trouble until he got to your place, and then it was too late to tell me. He just had to hope his plan worked.” He scratched the darkening stubble on his chin. “None of this explains why he acted like he did last night. He didn't mention any of it, then bolted when we asked him. He could have said it while we were sitting there with no one to hear or see. He's not bipolar or something, is he?”

Andrea arched an eyebrow. “First off, bipolar wouldn't make you forget you wanted to tell your first sergeant something. Second, he's never displayed any mental illness. Outside of addiction, he's as healthy as he can be.”

“So why was he acting like that last night?”

“Stress can do crazy things to the mind.” Andrea turned in her seat to look at Josh. “Maybe he's manifesting a panic disorder. Especially with him talking about bugs in your office.”

“
My
office? There are no bugs in my office.”

“Okay...”

“They're in yours.”

This was ridiculous. Clearly, the loopiness of the late hour had laid claim to Josh's sanity. “Josh, there's no reason for him to be worried about—” The hard expression he directed at her slashed through the thought. “No.” She gripped the edge of the table, nausea roiling in her gut. Somebody had been listening to her sessions, to her phone calls, to her patients...and for who knew how long. Even with all that had already happened, this far surpassed her worst nightmares. This was so much more personal, so much more intrusive. “They've been listening? And that's why he wanted to get out of my office so badly last night?”

“Based on Cameron's behavior, it's probably more than listening.” Josh slipped into the chair beside hers and pressed his hands onto the table, studying his fingers. “He kept saying they knew everything.”

Andrea's eyes slipped shut. Too much stimuli assaulted her at once. “Explain.”

“If it was just a listening device, he would have risked writing what he wanted to say. He was afraid somebody could not only hear us, but see us, and he didn't want to risk anyone knowing his secrets.”

The feeling of being exposed sent spidery tingles running up her arms, like invisible gazes brushing her skin even as she sat in Josh's dining room. “How did they get access to my office?”

“Have you had any work done lately?”

“None that... Yes. A couple of weeks ago, we switched to cable internet. Not too long after, a couple of guys showed up and said the initial installation crew was from a new subcontractor and they needed to verify the work.”

“That's it, then.”

“And that's when they got access to my printer, too.” Andrea looked away, trying to hide her fear. “But why? Wade wasn't even seeing me at that point.”

“I have no idea.”

“This all feels like a puzzle that's missing pieces.”

“Well, I know where one of those pieces is.” Josh shoved the chair from the table and snatched his keys from the bar that edged the dining area. “We've got a wall locker to check out.”

NINE

J
osh had been at the building that housed his infantry unit at all hours of the day and night, but his workplace had never felt shadowy and dark the way it did in the predawn with Andrea beside him. He knew the place better than his own house, but things felt different tonight. He should have taken her home and come alone instead of exposing her to possible danger. As he suspected, with another picture sitting on Andrea's phone, the guys in the Muscogee County Jail weren't the only ones involved. What if someone else had discovered Wade Cameron's hiding place? The chances that someone would randomly get the message at the same time as they did were incredible, but he'd seen crazier coincidences enough times to know that anything was possible.

Josh tried not to telegraph his concern to Andrea as he switched off the truck and scanned the shadows at the edges of the buildings, where streetlights didn't quite cut the thick darkness. “Ready?”

Andrea didn't look ready. It wouldn't surprise him if she had the ability to read his mind and knew exactly where his concerns lay. He could see her eyes in the dim light. She took in everything. Finally, she took a deep breath, seemed to remember he was there and to draw some sense of peace from his presence. “Let's rock and roll.”

The door locks popped open, and they climbed out and met at the front of the truck. She lifted a hand toward him, then dropped it to her side. “Are you sure nobody's watching us?”

That possibility had circled his head more than once and had finally been dismissed. “Whoever this is has proven they know how to get on post, but nobody followed us out here, not unless they were driving without headlights. Around here, that's a good way to hit an armadillo.”

“Or a wild boar.” She relaxed the slightest bit. “What do you think he's hidden in there?”

“Who knows?” Josh dropped his cell into the cargo pocket of his shorts and jingled the keys in his hand. “He said he hid their drugs. Depending on the amount, they could be in there.” His feet slid to a halt as he stopped walking and stared at the building. “Although that would be exceptionally stupid.”

“In an unused wall locker, how would anybody know who they belonged to or how long they'd been there? I'd say it's pretty smart.”

Josh reached for her elbow and guided her forward, still surveilling the area. Nothing moved outside of a slight breeze in the tops of the trees, though the air in the parking lot was heavy and still. “This is true, but it would also invite a one hundred percent drug test for the entire battalion. Since there's no way to know if or when they'd be found, it's asking for trouble if somebody gets caught in that test and they're using. Anybody who came up hot would be out for blood.”

“Then again, maybe he wants anybody using to get caught and forced into getting help.”

“Spoken like a true head doctor.” Josh let his hand slide down her arm but stopped just short of taking her hand. Until he told her the truth, she was off-limits in nearly every way. His job was to protect her, to make amends for what he'd already made wrong in her family. Josh let go of her arm and placed his palm against her back, desperate to shield her even if he couldn't have her.

“Occupational hazard. Everyone gets psychoanalyzed.”

“Going to take another crack at figuring me out?” Josh kept his tone light, but it mattered what she thought about him and how well she could see through the facade he'd erected so long ago.

They stopped at the entrance to the company and she turned to face him, leaning her shoulder on the doorjamb. “Do you really want me to answer that? Here? Now?”

“You think I can't handle it?” The lock stuck as he turned the key and the door gave resistance as he pushed it open. He made one last survey of the parking lot as he ushered her inside. “I'm a company first sergeant in an infantry unit. I pass down the info guys don't want to hear and hold them to the standards they don't always want to be held to. There's nothing you can say as bad as what some of them have spouted behind my back. Or as bad as some of their wives have screamed in my face.”

“I can imagine.” Her chuckle sounded forced, echoing off the walls as she stepped into the building ahead of him. “I can remember how I felt about some of my first sergeants. Now that I'm older, the things they were doing back then make more sense.”

“Does this mean I'll get about a thousand apology letters from these guys in a decade or so?”

“Only if those wild hogs around here sprout wings. But I'll guarantee you they'll never forget you. Just like you've never forgotten any of your old first sergeants. You knew who cared and who didn't, even if you didn't always want to admit it, right?”

“Spot on.” Inside, he didn't flip on the lights. Instead, he let the darkness settle around them as the door thudded shut. “And now that you've nailed that one, you can tell me what your psychoanalysis of this old first sergeant is.” His voice dropped huskier than he meant, but it was too late to take the words back.

The change in Andrea's breathing was audible in the darkness. “I don't think anything.”

He caught her hand. As his eyes adjusted, Josh could make out the faint outline of her. “No. You don't have to censor yourself.” Knowing how Andrea saw him mattered more than anything Wade Cameron could have hidden in the base of a busted wall locker.

“Okay.” She pulled in a deep breath. “You're hiding something.”

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

“You do.”

The false anonymity of the dark room loosened his inhibitions and made him want to spill everything. In spite of the sense of danger that refused to be shaken, there was safety here between them, safety he wasn't sure he wanted to shatter by telling her about the night her brother died. Spilling his guts onto the floor could be more dangerous than anything Andrea had faced in the past couple of days.

That feeling made him doubly sure he shouldn't have kissed her earlier. It had been monumentally unfair to her. The look on her face if she found out who he really was would be more than he could bear. “Sorry, Doc. You missed that one completely.” He dropped her hand in a vain effort to break the connection that grew stronger every second.

“I don't know what it is,” she whispered, “but there's more to the story than you're telling.” Her fingers brushed the scar on his arm, tightening his stomach. “You weren't alone in that car wreck.”

Adrenaline jolted his heart out of rhythm. “What makes you say that?”

“The things you don't say when you talk about the wreck. This sort of overinflated protector streak you have. Who was she?”

The air hung heavy with an intimacy he'd never felt before. Half of him wanted to reach out and pull her to him, to spill everything and hold on tight to what existed here and now so the bad couldn't beat its way in. The other half wanted to shove her aside and run until no one ever found him again. When her fingers tightened on his biceps, his mouth made the choice to tell her about the accident, even if he still buried everything that happened before it. “Blind date. Lauren. I barely even knew her.” Even now, he couldn't recall her face, which only amped the wattage of his guilt.

“Was the wreck your fault?” She swallowed so hard he could hear it. “Were you drinking?”

The urge to smile at her assumption was trumped by how close to the truth the question was. “Not that night. Fortunately. And never again after.” Not after what he'd seen happen to Brendan that same night.

Josh leaned a shoulder against the door, hoping it was strong enough to hold up the weight of his mistakes. “I lost control of my SUV when a tire blew and it rolled.” His voice sounded too big for the small space between them.

Andrea's touch trailed down his arm, raising goose bumps in its wake. She gripped his fingers, pulling them from the door handle and lacing them with her own. He hadn't realized he was gripping so tightly until she touched him.

“Like an idiot, I wasn't wearing a seat belt and got thrown from the vehicle. Oddly enough, that's probably what saved my life.” He swallowed an all-too familiar nausea.

“She died.” There was a knowing, like she'd heard the story before and was hoping the ending would change.

The pity didn't anger him as it had from so many others in the past. From Andrea, it was sincere, almost like she wished she could make the outcome different. “Vehicle caught fire. I tried to get to her, but...” The memory shot phantom pain through his scarred arm. “I was too far away. The injuries to my knee and arm made me too slow.” He dragged his sight back from the nightmare of the past to the darkened silhouette of the woman in front of him. “I tried. And I couldn't. The pain took me out. When I came around, the EMTs were there and it was over. Everybody told me she died before the fire, but that never stopped the nightmares.”

Andrea squeezed his hand in a way that made him want to connect. The urge to close the distance between them and kiss her, to feel alive and grounded in a completely different kind of moment nearly overwhelmed him.

“Nightmares aren't uncommon after trauma.”

The matter-of-fact statement dashed cold reality all over his emotions. Her interest in him was strictly clinical, and she was a threat to his sanity, ripping open boxes of memories he'd sealed shut. He had to find a switch and throw light between them. Fast.

Josh yanked his hand from hers and backed away. “Know what? I never should have said anything.”

“Josh...”

“Forget it.” His fingers brushed the plate below the switch. “It's better if—”

The sound of a door opening somewhere in the building cut off the rest of his words.

Beside him, Andrea gasped.

He grabbed her wrist, grateful he hadn't given away their position by flipping a light switch. Much longer and he'd have exposed them to whoever lurked nearby. Intuition had told him the danger wasn't over, yet he'd dropped every guard he had. Now Andrea might pay the price.

Without a word, he pulled her through the small room lined with wall lockers until they reached the bathroom. The sickly sweet smell of old shampoo and sweaty gym clothes weighed heavily in the stale air. Amazing it had never seemed so strong before, but in the dark, looking for a position from which he could protect Andrea, it was almost more than his stomach could handle.

For the first time ever, Josh was grateful for every minute he'd spent in this building. By instinct, he knew exactly where to turn. Within seconds, they stood in the far corner of the room, away from the door. The only flaw with the plan was there was no way out if someone found them.

He gripped Andrea's shoulders as though he could look her in the eye if he tried hard enough in the blackness. “Don't move.”

“How'd they find us?” Far from the frightened utterance he'd expected to hear, her voice was level and calm.

“I don't know.” He wanted to tell her she shouldn't worry, that he'd protect her, but it felt too much like lying. Instead, he pressed his lips to her forehead and whispered, “Wait here.” He squeezed her shoulders one more time then inched toward the door, unarmed, listening to footsteps that drew closer with each breath.

* * *

Numb. That's all she was. It felt like she was watching herself on a movie screen instead of existing in this moment. Disassociation could happen under stress, but Andrea had never known it to this degree. Terror ought to have her plastered to the floor, but all she could muster was a cold resignation that scared her even more. They were backed into a corner. If the rest of her life was going to be spent hiding in shadows, it might be better to step out now and let the insanity end tonight. Stark defeat had never been part of her makeup, but she couldn't handle being stalked at every move, couldn't live with the uncertainty of the whole situation. Whatever Wade had gotten into, it was bigger than she'd imagined.

From across the room, she could hear Josh breathe. Even though his shape was difficult to discern, it was impossible to ignore his presence. This wasn't his fight, yet there he stood, on the front lines, willing to protect her to the end.

The idea caught her in the chest and stole her next breath. He'd been there from the first moment she'd stepped into this nightmare, walking beside her, never once hesitating to come to her defense. There wasn't a thing she could offer him in return, not one reason for his involvement. After the story he'd just told her, it was beyond belief he hadn't run fast in the other direction when faced with her mounting problems. Andrea blinked long and slow, then opened her eyes again, allowing herself to surrender to someone else's help for the first time in her memory.
God, I don't know why he's here...but thank You.

Voices drifted to her tiny corner, though her ears buzzed too much from a surge of adrenaline to make out the words.

Josh chuckled, the sound as out of place as a lake in the desert. “Stay here,” he whispered as he stepped closer. “Whatever you do, don't come out.”

When he left the room, he took all of the air with him. Andrea pressed her back against the cool wall, trying to shrink as small as possible. What was he doing? He couldn't confront those guys head-on and unarmed.

She blinked against light that suddenly flooded in from the hallway.

“This is First Sergeant Walker.” Josh's commanding voice barged into the room and pounded in her ears.

Was he crazy? The bad guys weren't going to care who he was. Shock fused her spine to the cinder block wall.

Laughter came into the room next, followed by more voices. Even though Andrea figured they were both insane, the sound of Josh's shared laughter washed over her and ebbed the tide of terror. Things were going to be okay.

This time.

Josh reappeared, silhouetted in the doorway. She'd missed it before, how broad his shoulders were, how his waist narrowed at his hips and cut a figure that spoke of strength and assurance.