Love Love (21 page)

***

It’s
Saturday night, and the Sky Bar is packed like sardines in a can,
and it almost smells the same. The music is blaring. People are
practically having sex on the dance floor.
Get a room
. I get on my tippy toes
and try to spot Fran and Kyle, but it’s hard to see over all the
giant heads. I hear a voice calling me and follow the direction of
the sound. I think I see Fran and Kyle at a table near the bar,
holding hands casually and scanning the room for me. Bumping into
some guy on the way over to the table, he spills his drink, and I
hear him mutter a curse at me.

“
Watch where you’re going.”
Like I can even see where I’m going.

I finally make it over to the table
and Fran grabs me and plants a big kiss on my cheek, then I hug
Kyle. “Let’s sit closer to the door, otherwise Dane won’t be able
to find us.” That’s assuming he doesn’t stand me up
again.

Fran, of course, eyes him the moment
he walks in the door, and elbows me-hard. Watching Dane’s eyes scan
the room is like watching a wild animal searching for its next
meal. His eyes finally settle on me and he gives me that
panty-dropping smile. Unfortunately for him, I don’t want to drop
my panties anymore. He reaches me quickly, and when he does, pulls
me into a kiss. A long, deep kiss. The kind of kiss that other
people shouldn’t be seeing; the kind that I’m trying to avoid. I
make to pull away from him quickly and notice Fran appears to be
gasping for air, while Kyle looks turned on. They’ll be rushing
home for hot sex in a minute, I just know it.

“
Dane, you already know
Fran. This is Fran’s boyfriend, Kyle.”

He greets Kyle in his all-business
demeanor. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Kyle eyes Dane up and down,
protectively, taking in his finely-tailored suit and tie and his
outrageously expensive Berluti leather shoes.
“Likewise.”

Dane goes to the bar to get a round of
drinks for all of us. Kyle looks over to me with a huge grin.
“Gabby, have you seen this girl play Scrabble? She beat the pants
off of us again last night.”

Interesting choice of words. “I heard
something about that, Kyle, and you must have some sort of magic up
your sleeve, because I’ve never been able to get her to play
Scrabble in the entire fifteen years we’ve been
friends.”

Kyle and Fran make googly eyes at each
other and kiss. I’m a bit jealous.

Dane returns with our drinks; martinis
for Fran and I, and gin and tonics for the guys. The conversation
is flowing freely and everyone’s getting along. I know Dane and I
need to talk, but I’m not ready to do it just yet. I need to get a
buzz on to calm my nerves; I might even need to get trashed. Kyle
and Dane seem to be hitting it off, which is great because Fran and
I have a chance to talk. At some point during our conversation,
Fran motions over her shoulder and I wonder what she’s staring at.
I follow her gaze and see Brad standing at the bar with a woman.
What’s he doing here, and who the hell is that?

“
Gabby, Brad’s here. He’s
been here for a while.”

“
I know, I see him.” My
stomach flips. I eye the girl. She looks vaguely familiar, with
long auburn hair, blue eyes, a tight-fitting dress and a figure to
die for.

“
Who’s that chick he’s
with? She’s pretty hot.”

“
How the hell should I
know?” My tone is biting and I immediately regret it. Fran can pick
up the jealousy scent a mile away.

“
Whoa, Gabby. Get a grip.
You’re not dating or anything.”

A knot forms in my stomach and I need
to find the bathroom, fast. I might just throw up again. This is
becoming a habit around Brad. It’s so freaking crowded in here and
I have to push through a maze of intoxication, sweat, and ass
grabbing to get there. Thankfully my legs are moving quickly and
I’ve almost reached my destination when I feel a hand catch my
elbow. I spin around like a top and practically knock someone
over.

“
Gabby. Hey.”

Just that simple touch makes me
tremble. “Hey, Brad. I’m in a hurry, what do you want?” I feel my
whole body tense up at my harsh words.

Brad looks slightly offended and I
suddenly feel bad. “I just wanted to say hi. I had the night off
tonight so I came out for some drinks.”

Even though I already know the answer,
I ask the question. “You here by yourself?”

“
No, I’m here with Erica
from work.” He waves a hand at her standing at the other side of
the bar, and then eyes me curiously. A bead of sweat forms at the
corner of his brow and he reaches up to swipe it away. The touch of
his fingers causes his hair to sway. And there it is, a crinkle.
Right smack in the middle of his damn forehead.

I don’t know how I never noticed it
before. My breathing picks up, and suddenly the walls are closing
in. I'm pushing against them with all my might, but they won't
move, so I need to. “Let me go, Brad.”

"Gabby, what is it? What’s
wrong?"

"Nothing. Just let me go.”

I’m feeling the need to stomp my feet,
cry, or hit something. I crash into several people on the way to
the bathroom, but I don’t care. Pushing open the door, I scan the
room and am relieved to find it empty. I pace the length of the
pee-stained tile floor; back and forth, back and forth. He has a
freaking crinkle on his forehead! What the hell?! I suppose he also
enjoys picking up super absorbent tampons in his spare time, too. I
kick my heel firmly into the back of the stall door.
Damnit!

I have to get out of here now; I can
hardly breathe and I need air desperately. I finally find a path
back to the table and lean over to Fran. “Hey, I’m
leaving.”

“
Are you okay?” Fran
whispers, making to stand.

“
Yeah, I’m fine.” I know I
sound less than convincing.

I hear her mutter under her breath and
she pulls me away from the table; away from Kyle and Dane, who
didn’t even notice I was gone. “The hell you are. Talk to me,
Gabby. Is this about Brad?”

“
I just want to go, Fran.”
I’m edgy, bordering on whiny.

“
Gabby, listen to me.
Brad’s been staring at you all night. He hasn’t taken his eyes off
of you. He may be here with someone else, but he’s barely noticed
her. You may not want to hear this, but I think he’s into you. I
saw the way he was looking at you at his shop. It couldn’t be more
obvious.”

“
What are you talking
about?”

“
Come on, Gabby. This is me
you’re talking to, and you can’t pull this shit with me. I see the
way he looks at you, and that’s not how you look at a friend. It’s
not just that, either. You’ve been different, too.” She sighs and
puts her hands on either side of my face, forcing me to look in her
eyes. “It’s okay, you know. It’s okay to let yourself be
happy.”

I shake her hands away and
then, slowly and
very
casually, look over my shoulder. Our eyes meet. Brad’s been
watching me. Immediately, I look away and resume my conversation
with Fran. Somewhere, deep down, I know she’s right. I’ve been
trying to ignore it, but it’s becoming impossible.

I can’t stay here. “Fran, I want to
go.”

“
Kyle and I will come with
you if you want, and I mean that.”

“
No, you guys stay. I’ll be
fine. I’ll see you later.” I give Fran and Kyle each a hug, and
walk over to Dane. He’s been practically ignoring me anyway, first
talking to Kyle and now to his female colleague from the ad agency,
who’s apparently joined our table.

I place one hand on my hip. “Dane, I’m
leaving.”

“
What? We just got here.”
He’s caught completely off guard.

I breathe deeply. “I just want to
go.”

“
Okay, then I’m coming with
you.”

Really? Why bother? My panties are off
limits. “Fine.”

Dane says his goodbyes to his
colleagues and follows me out of the bar. I feel him trying to keep
up with me as my feet hit the pavement with long, quick strides.
When I look over at him, confusion covers his face. The same
confusion that I feel.

He stops suddenly, grabs my shoulders,
and turns me around. “What’s going on, Gabby? What’s wrong? I don’t
understand. The nights we’ve spent together over the last several
months have been…well, amazing. But the past couple of weeks, you
seem distant and distracted. You ignored my calls all weekend, and
tonight we’ve barely spoken at all.”

Unsure of what to say, I just lift my
shoulder and stare at him blankly. I know it’s not good enough.
It’s also not fair to Dane. “I’m just tired, and I want to go
home.”

Hesitantly, Dane reaches for my hand.
“Can I come with you?”

I really don’t want to hurt his
feelings, but that’s the last thing I want. I need to be alone.
“Can we talk tomorrow, Dane? Right now I want to go home. I just
want some time to myself.”

Dane nods with understanding, and at
that moment, I see a flicker of something I can appreciate about
him. “Let me at least hail you a cab.”

I’m in no mood to fight with him. He
gives me a chaste kiss on the lips and helps me into the
taxi.

My mind is racing and so is my heart.
If I was in a cartoon, steam would be leaving my head right now.
Picking at the dirty leather on the seat of the taxi, I just keep
shaking my head. It’s all I can do. It feels like someone’s playing
a cruel joke on me, only the problem is, it doesn’t feel so cruel.
It kind of feels like fate.

My phone buzzes, and it startles me. I
don’t want to answer it, but when I see it’s Brad, I can’t help but
smile. Why the hell am I smiling? I’m mad at him!

“
Gabby? It’s
Brad.”

“
I know who it is,” I reply
with a bit more anger than I’d intended.

“
Are you okay?”

He sounds genuinely concerned, which
only increases my guilt. “Yes, I’m fine, why?”

“
You seemed upset with me
earlier. Did I do something? You left without even saying goodbye,
and before…” His voice trails off, and he sounds hesitant, as if
weighing something over in his mind.

“
Before what?”

“
Before I could ask you to
dance.”

Did he say dance? “What?”

“
I wanted to dance with
you.”

“
With me? What about
your
date
?” I
can’t help the sarcastic drip in my voice.

“
Erica wasn’t my date.
She’s my friend. She works with me at the shop.”

“
She’s pretty,” I say
reluctantly, because it’s true.

“
Yes, she is; very. But
she’s just a friend.”

A temporary feeling of relief floods
my body.

“
Where are you?” he asks,
his voice anxious and demanding at the same time. A side of him I
haven’t seen.

“
I told you, I’m in a cab
on my way home.”

“
Yeah, but
where?”

I peek out the window. “We’re on
Broadway, about to pass Bloomingdale’s.”

“
Okay, can you get out at
Bloomingdale’s? I’m on my way there.”

“
What? Wait!” Too late; he
already hung up. “Stop the cab!” I’ve always wanted to say
that.

I fumble with my fingers. What am I
doing? I’m standing in front of Bloomingdale’s waiting for Brad,
that’s what I’m doing. Just when I change my mind and decide to
leave, I see him jogging towards me. He’s breathing heavily, his
cheeks flushed and muscles flexing underneath his shirt, his wavy
brown hair blowing in the breeze. I’m not going
anywhere.

When he finally reaches me, he’s
completely breathless. “Thanks for waiting for me.”

“
Brad, what on earth are
you doing here?”

He grabs my hand, his touch making me
tremble. “I told you. I want to dance with you.”

“
Here?” I gesture to the
crowded New York sidewalk.

“
Why not?”

It’s confirmed, he’s absolutely
insane. “Okay, now I know you’re certifiable.”