Love of Her Lives (18 page)

The creature’s eyes widened and seemed to flare with gold fire. It sent a hissing sound that blew Beth’s bangs off her face. Sweet? Apparently not. Finn disappeared then suddenly reappeared behind her. Startled, she stood perfectly still while he circled her.

“You know …” She swallowed. “Bethia is just fine. As a matter of fact I quite like the name — means life, or so I’ve been told.”

Finn came to a stop in front of her, a blatant invasion of her personal space. “Good, Bethia. I know what you want, and I’m going to grant it, but first I want to talk about you and Calum.

“Okay.” Like she had a choice.

“He may not know it, but I’ve a fondness for the human.”

“Calum?”

“Yes,” Finn said with a nod and amiable demeanour. “You know why he’s here, don’t you? To save you, Bethia. He’d give his life for yours without thinking. He has before. Now, you may not consider it a great sacrifice, thinking he carried the knowledge of life–after–life, but he did it without that wisdom. Do you think it a great sacrifice?”

“Dying for me? Yes, I guess that qualifies.”

“How generous of you to say so. You’ve a sympathetic heart to be sure. That’s why I want you to know that Calum has a problem.”

Her heart pumped a shot of alarm through her body. “He does?”

Finn nodded again, his thin lips pressed in a tight curve. “You see, ideally, Calum walks the earth and you find him, but you’re too disconnected in this life. It’s the Old Ones doing, they like to manipulate you poor souls while keeping you in the dark.”

What was he talking about?

“Irregardless, Calum found you, but he paid a price, Bethia. Something vital was taken from him.”

Finn looked quite compassionate. It must be something terrible. What had Calum sacrificed to rescue her? “What was taken?”

“Calum is a man of great passion, Bethia.”

“I’d be hard–pressed not to have noticed that.”

“Good. Did you know that energy from passionate people such as Calum is fodder for the universe, so to speak.”

“Fodder?”

“Yes, and the world is in need of that kind of energy. There’s an imbalance — too many are driven by greed — it’s abhorrent and it pains me.”

What was this goblin getting at? He started to hover off the ground, floating back and forth in front of her.

“Could you perhaps stay rooted to the ground?”

Finn ignored that request. “I want to see Calum restored. Would you help?”

She felt sick to know he’d suffered a terrible affliction to come to her aid and without one complaint. The man defined gallant. “I’ll do whatever I can.”

A wide smile swept over his face. “There should be more humans like you — and Calum, of course — willing to sacrifice for others.”

She stiffened. “What kind of sacrifice?”

Finn made a dismissive gesture. “Oh meager, Bethia, quite meager. As I was saying, Calum thought nothing of himself when he perceived your crisis, and granting him a human form was truly my gift. Calum is a man of great passion — ”

“Yes, yes, you said that. The man is passionate, the world needs more like him, and he sacrificed. I get that. What was taken from him?”

“Impatience is not attractive, Bethia.” Finn held her eyes and drew a slow breath before continuing. “They took a vital thing, that which means the most to him, besides you of course — they stripped from him the vehicle to express his passion fully.”

What vehicle? “You’re going to have to be more specific.”

A slight smile played on his lips. “He is unable to raise the flag, if you catch my meaning.” The trickster glanced at his own groin and grimaced at Beth. “Impotent. Can’t perform.”

A laugh burst from her throat. “Right. There is no way that man can’t perform.”

“It’s quite true.”

“You don’t understand. Calum never stops performing. The man is turned on every moment of every day.”

“I know. His arousal never ceases. It’s quite a pity. All that passion going to waste.”

“You know, Finn, I could believe anything else, but not that.”

His iridescent eyes narrowed as he swooped in close to her face. “I may pick and choose what I reveal, all in good sport, but I don’t fabricate.”

“Okay, okay, it’s just …”

“I know. It’s just that he wants you so badly, dear Bethia. He suffers day and night knowing he can’t please you.”

Could that possibly be true? Beth took a nervous step back and tripped over her feet.

“It was terribly unfair, don’t you think?” He continued. “You must understand that Calum is bound only to you, and wants desperately to renew the union with his only true love. He feels every desire to do so, every aching need, but alas, he cannot.”

She was painfully aware of the aching need feeling. “That is rather awful.”

“Yes. But, you could help him, sweet Bethia.”

Here it comes. “How’s that?”

“If you were to become the seducer, if you allowed your passion to grow with his, if you freed your soul to feel for Calum, then I can assure you, he will regain his ability, and you will not be left wanting in any way. You will never know satisfaction of a greater kind.”

“You want me to have sex with him?”

“Sex won’t work. You have to make love, let your passion for Calum free, feel it, and want him, Bethia.”

A sudden thought occurred to her. “Did he put you up to this?”

“Calum must never know we had this talk or everything will be lost. Everything he came here to put right.”

“But, I have a, uh, a mantra, and — ”

“You must let it go. Have I not made myself clear? You will not be left wanting in
any
way. You have my word. If you see Calum for the man he is, then the beliefs that hold you back cease to exist.”

“You promised to grant my wish. I wished to go home.”

“I know.” The immortal held up his hand and a crimson key appeared between his thumb and forefinger. “When you want to leave the mountain, this key will let you out. Using it brings an end to the game. All you need do is put it in your ignition and drive. But, Bethia, if you tell Calum that I’ve talked with you or show him the key, it won’t work.”

Game? “What game?” Calum said the trickster liked to play games.

“Now, you choose.” Finn placed the key in her hand and floated backwards. “You either put your trust in the man who spanned worlds to get to you, or put your trust in the rest of the world.”

Finn vanished in a gust of wind.

Beth sat in the car outside their rustic retreat running her fingers through the silver tassel tied to the end of the key clutched in her hand. When given the choice to leave Calum and go back to the real world, she’d not had to think hard. She would stay. It wasn’t because Finn emphasized Calum’s great sacrifice. It wasn’t because she feared the immortal and didn’t want to be in his disfavour. It wasn’t even because Calum needed her to solve his “problem.” It was simpler than that. Neither her mind, nor her body, nor perhaps her soul wanted to leave him. Whether they’d been together for a thousand years or five days, it wasn’t nearly enough. And that had not come clear until she’d had to choose.

With that decision made, she moved on to the conundrum that followed in its wake. Calum unable to perform? She would never have believed it if not for his behaviour yesterday. When she’d become aggressive, he’d fled the cabin with important things to do. Right. His behaviour didn’t add up. The man was atomic energy when
he
had the upper hand, when he thought she would stay above board, keep to her beliefs. What would Calum do if she didn’t back off?

All her life she’d been fueled by feelings of inadequacy and abandonment. She’d used self–control to feel empowered. But she didn’t feel inadequate or abandoned any longer. If Calum and Finn spoke the truth, she’d sustained the love of the most upright man she’d ever known for lifetimes. She was certainly adequate in Calum’s eyes.

If you were to become the seducer, if you allowed your passion to grow with his, if you freed your soul to feel for Calum, then I can assure you, he will regain his ability, and you will not be left wanting in any way.

So what if it was true? No room there for abandonment. Calum said he was hers — 100 percent committed. It sounded like her quota was filled. Beth stuffed the elf’s crimson key into the back of the glove box and headed for the cabin.

As she stood in the doorway watching him, Calum turned from the stove. There was nothing sexier than a man cooking dinner.

“Hi,” she said. “That smells good.”

“Ah, you’re much better, I see.” He flicked his head, tossing a long strand of crème–caramel hair from his face and sent her a breathtaking smile as he regarded her change in mood. Okay, that was sexy too. Not to mention that he’d read her from a mere glance.

She tossed her purse on the table and came to peer in the pot. He had one hand on the handle, stirring with the other.

“Stew.”

His hands were occupied, so Beth wrapped hers around him, resting her cheek on his back. She felt him rumble with pleasure.

“You’ve forgiven me for stranding you just a wee bit off Earth?”

“You were right, Calum. We should make the best of it. This is paradise, and who am I to scoff at pleasure and decadence.”

“You’re no imbecile that I’ve noticed.”

“Gee thanks.” She swatted the back of his head. “I’m going to make us a toasty fire to snuggle by.” And then, she was going to light a different kind of fire, in the pit of Calum.

Ten minutes later the flames were a warm glow. She plopped down on the sheep’s wool rug, her back against the couch, her legs stretched out.

“So you are fine with this now?” Calum asked, hanging the ax in place.

“Being here with you? Or did you mean my fire?”

“The with me
part.”

Slow and purposely, she swept him from top to toes with her gaze. The man was beautiful. Cutting wood, he’d handled that ax like he was slicing bread. She had nearly drooled watching the muscles flex in his graceful arms.

“Come here, and I’ll whisper it in your ear.”

He hesitated.
There he goes again.
Or, maybe not. Calum sauntered over and straddled her, a knee on each side, his forearms resting on the couch aside her head.

“Tell me,
m’eudail.
Why?”

Beth smiled into those eyes of blue. “Well, it’s not because you’re a lightweight.” She bumped his butt with her knee. He didn’t budge. “Though you are a good cook, and I can’t tell you what a turn–on that is.”

“That’s where you’re wrong. Tell me everything that turns you on.”

She glanced to the hearth. “You know how to start my fire.”

He smiled. “I plan to keep it burning.”

“Good, we’ll get on that as soon as I’m finished.”

His biceps were solid under her hand. “You’re strong — certainly comes in handy.” She ran her hands over those muscles a few more times. “Actually you’ve got nice arms, and your shoulders aren’t bad either. And that back of yours, well, let’s just say you’re a fine specimen of perfect physical attributes.”

“You love me for my body?” With her head cradled in his big hands, he began to move his thumbs up and down the sides of her head across the sensitive skin behind her ear.

“Every time you touch me I feel like melting. For such a powerful man, you are very gentle.”

His gaze softened as his thumbs started to twirl circles on her neck.

“No, Calum, it’s not just your physical appeal. You’re considerate and chivalrous, yet sensitive too. You’re kind and fun–loving, and oh wait, persistent, let’s not forget that one. But the thing I like most about you is you make me feel treasured, as if there’s nothing you want more than me.”

He laughed softly.

“What’s so funny?”

“It’s not that,
m’eudail.
Do you know what it means?
M’eudail?
”

“I hope it’s something nice since you keep calling me that.”

“It means
my treasure
.”

“Oh,” she said faintly. “You’re making me melt again.”

“Before you turn to mush … thank you for what you said. I wasn’t expecting that. You make my insides weak too, Bethia.”

“You’re doing it again, dipping my name in chocolate, and if you’re about to dissolve, maybe you should lift off me.”

“Hell no. I love having you in this position.” He eased off a touch by leaning forward to bite her jaw.

“You have a real need to dominate, Mister I’m-About-To-Dissolve.”

“Yes, and still you let me get you into this position.” He held her hands tight to the floor. “You are the first course,
m’eudail
, and you’re not getting the second course till I’m done with you.”

The man had a way about him, and Beth didn’t know whether to be infuriated or infatuated.
She
was supposed to play dominant tonight — rather difficult considering she couldn’t move.

“Close your eyes,” came his seductive demand.

“Oh,” she moaned weakly as her eyes fluttered shut. Calum’s hot mouth closed over hers in a savage claim. Dominant, he would be, over and over until she had given him everything. He rasped her cheek with his jaw, bit her neck with his teeth, and ravaged her mouth with his tongue. With her eyes closed she could do nothing but feel, immobilized by his body. It was incredibly sensual. She arched and leaned her head back on the couch, not knowing where his mouth would tantalize her next. Her eyelids, her earlobe, her mouth, her neck. With each placement of his lips, he savoured her as though she was his last supper.

“Take whatever you want,” she offered. “Just don’t stop.”

He made a low sound in his throat as he travelled down her neck with his lips, leaving her trembling in anticipation. He released her hands, only to grab her by the hips and pull her flat. When she reached up to touch his face, he smiled mischievously, took both her hands in his and raised them over her head.

“Keep them there. Don’t touch me,
m’eudail
, or I will stop.”

Long strands of hair brushed his cheekbones as he unbuttoned her blouse, grazing her skin with the backs of his fingers, holding her still as his gaze slid over her like a torch — daring her to move. She didn’t.