Love, Rosie (241 page)

Ruby:

Rosie:

Ruby:

Rosie:

Ruby:

But
doesn’t
what
you
don’t
know
make
you
even
the
teeny
tiniest
bit

curious?

No.
I
have
a
shit
job
with
shit
pay,
a
shit
flat
with
shit
rent.
I
have

no
time
for
shit
sex
with
a
shit
man.

Rosie!

What?
I’m
serious.

I
just
cannot
believe
my
ears.
I’m
flabbergasted
by
this
news.
OK

I’m
taking
you
out
clubbing
at
the
weekend.

356

Rosie:

Cecelia
Ahern

Clubbing?
Do
you
really
think
bringing
me
to
a
place
where
I
am
10

years
older
than
everyone
is
really
going
to
make
me
feel
better?
You

think
young
hot-blooded
males
are
interested
in
36-year-old,
out
of

shape,
single
mothers
these
days?
I
don’t
think
so.
I
think
they’re

interested
in
women
with
breasts
resting
above
their
belly
buttons.

Ruby:

Oh
don’t
exaggerate.
You’re
36
not
96!
And
I
met
my
Teddy
in
a

nightclub
and
he
may
not
be
Brad
Pitt
but
what
he
lacks
in
looks
he

makes
up
for
in
the
bedroom
department.

Rosie:

Ruby:

Rosie:

Ruby:

Rosie:

Really?
You
mean
to
tell
me
that
sex
is
good
with
Teddy?

Well
I’m
not
with
the
man
for
conversation
am
I?

Of
course
not,
I’m
not
that
stupid.
I
knew
there
was
something

keeping
you
two
together,
but
sex
was
the
last
thing
on
my
mind.

Well
all
that’s
going
to
change
now,
so
come
on
let’s
go
out
and

have
a
good
time.

Honestly
Ruby,
thanks
but
no
thanks.
I
really
have
no
interest
in

meeting
anyone.
And
if
I
did
what
would
I
do,
bring
him
home
to

meet
my
grieving
mother
sleeping
in
the
room
next
door?

Ruby:

I
suppose
you
have
a
point,
but
I’m
not
letting
you
get
away
with

this
for
much
longer.
Sooner
or
later
you’re
going
to
have
to
start

enjoying
yourself
again.
You
recognize
that
word,
Rosie?
Enjoy.
To

have
fun.

Rosie:

Ruby:

Rosie:

Ruby:

Rosie:

Ruby:

Rosie:

Never
heard
of
it.

Fine
then,
we’ll
go
to
the
pub
again
this
weekend
but
after
that
I’m

putting
you
back
on
the
market.

OK
but
trust
me
when
I
say
I’m
only
going
for
full
asking
price.

And
if
no
one’s
interested
in
buying
I’m
not
taking
on
any
renters.

What
about
squatters?

Ha
ha
ha.
All
trespassers
will
be
prosecuted.

I
can
just
picture
you
standing
there
with
a
shotgun
in
hand
order-

ing
men
off
your
land.

Now
you’re
getting
the
picture.

chapter
44

k

Dear
Mum,