Lover of My Dreams (25 page)

“Don’t worry, Rachel,” Gwen told her reassuringly. “We were married nearly two years before I was lucky enough to find myself with child. I thought I would never have any children but, thankfully, it finally happened. We have seven children now. Every one of them is a source of joy. I’m sure you’ll be just as blessed someday.”

“We’ll work on it, won’t we, honey,” Sam told her, smiling and winking at her.

Rachel blushed hotly in embarrassment. “Please excuse me,” she said quietly, trying to remove herself from the table.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Sam asked her seriously, all teasing gone from his voice. He refused to move from his seat, preventing Rachel from going anywhere.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” she told him slowly, enunciating each word and blushing in embarrassment as she spoke.

“I’ll go with you,” Gwen offered, extending her hand to help.

Rachel looked across the table to the kind, elderly woman and smiled gently, ignoring her anger at Sam for the moment. She reached her hand out and took Gwen’s hand in her own.

“If you don’t mind helping me, I would really appreciate it,” she told her sincerely.

Gwen stood and waited while Sam helped Rachel out of the seat and lifted her out of the camper to place her gently on the ground. He handed her the same bent stick she had used before and made sure that she was holding on to Gwen for support before he removed his hand from her elbow. He watched them as they slowly made their way toward the bathrooms before turning to go back into the camper and sit with Stan.

Stan smiled as Sam entered the camper. He had watched the way Sam had helped Rachel and was touched by the concern that Sam had shown his young wife.

“I bet they’re a lot alike, Sam,” Stan told him quietly.

“Think so?” Sam asked, sitting back down at the table to face him.

“Seems to me that they’re independent, proud, and loving women,” he said thoughtfully. “Ease off on your wife a little.”

“What do you mean?” Sam asked, totally baffled.

“It makes a difference how you talk to your woman,” he explained patiently. “Especially if they’re used to doing things for themselves like my wife is. You’ll be surprised at how much can be accomplished with tenderness. A lot can be decided in the wee hours of the morning when you two are snuggling in bed. A quiet word, a gentle touch. You’ll both be part of the decisions, and they’ll be reached together in a pretty enjoyable way.” Stan winked at Sam and smiled. “Course, all that talking and touching will probably lead to other things. And that’s pretty necessary if you want to have some children.”

Sam couldn’t help but laugh softly. He leaned back, content with the thoughts that filled his head and not afraid to admit it to himself.

“Thanks, Stan,” he said, offering his hand to shake the elder’s hand. “You’ve just made my day.”

Gwen helped Rachel hobble across the campground toward the bathrooms. They traveled in silence as Rachel struggled to hop without losing her balance because of her weakened state.

“I twisted my ankle the other day,” Rachel explained quietly. “I’ve also had a fever, so I’m a little weak. I really appreciate that you’re helping me. I hope I’m not too heavy for you.”

“Oh no, my dear,” Gwen protested even though she was, herself, a small woman. “You’re just a little slip of a thing. You won’t be a burden even when you’re heavy with child.”

Rachel stopped and looked down at Gwen in embarrassment. “Gwen, I don’t…” she began, trying to explain the misunderstanding.

“Don’t worry, Rachel,” Gwen stopped her. “I’m sure Sam will be very good to you—especially when you find out you’re going to have his baby. Men are all bushy and strong and all that, but when it comes right down to it, they’re just as cuddly and as gentle as they can be. You’ll see. Stan and I have been married for over forty years, and he’s gentler with me every day.”

Rachel looked into the older woman’s hazel eyes, unable to speak. All her frustration and loneliness rushed forth. Before she could stop herself, she threw her arms around Gwen’s shoulders and broke down into tears. Gwen put her arms around Rachel and held her gently while she cried.

“There, there, honey,” she soothed her. “Don’t get so upset. Time has a way of making things work out. You’ll see.”

“I’m sorry,” Rachel apologized between sniffs. “I just can’t help it.”

“That’s all right, dear. You go on and have yourself a good cry if you need to. You’ll feel better.” She patted her back reassuringly, holding her until she calmed down before letting go.

“It’s been a rough couple of weeks,” Rachel told Gwen, smiling sadly. “It’s probably better if I stay angry. It’ll keep me strong.”

“Sometimes it’s better to cry, honey,” Gwen offered.

Rachel nodded. Gwen was right. But she couldn’t give in to her tears right then. She needed to stay strong. It was the only way she would be able to survive.

* * * *

Stan and Sam were standing beside the small truck that the Fletchers drove when Gwen and Rachel returned. Sam watched them as they made their way toward the camper and couldn’t help but smile at the sight they made. Gwen barely came up to Rachel’s shoulder, yet she held her firmly and supported her while she hobbled her way back to the camper.

“Ready to go, Gwen?” Stan asked her, smiling lovingly at his wife.

“Ready, Stan. Now you take care of yourself, Rachel,” she said, turning to embrace the young woman and give her a kiss on her cheek. “I hope you and Sam are very happy.” She whispered the words against Rachel’s temple so that only Rachel could hear her.

“Thank you, Gwen,” Rachel whispered back, hugging her tightly. “Take care of yourself.”

“Bye, Stan,” Sam said, shaking hands with the elder man. “And thanks for the advice.”

Stan nodded and smiled. “Maybe we’ll be back this way to set up camp. We have to stock up on supplies and then decide where we’ll be camping for a while.”

“If you’re coming back to this campground, try to get here early,” Sam suggested as he opened the passenger door for Gwen. “The camp usually fills up pretty quickly and there’s supposed to be some rain tonight.”

“Thanks for everything,” Stan told him, climbing in behind the steering wheel. “I hope we see you again. Good-bye, Rachel.”

Sam and Rachel waved as the SUV pulled away. She turned to face him and saw that he was staring down at her.

“They’re nice people,” she said quietly, averting her face so that he couldn’t see that she had been crying.

She started to walk past him when he put his hand under her elbow to steady her as she hobbled along. She hesitated a moment but decided to say nothing and allow him help her back into the camper. She really wasn’t feeling well at all at the moment.

Once inside and seated at the table she turned to face him. “Would you mind telling me why you told them that we were married?” she asked him quietly.

“I didn’t,” Sam denied as he stood before her. “They assumed that the woman sleeping in
my
bed in
my
camper was
my
wife. A logical assumption, don’t you think?”

“Maybe so, but you could have told them the truth,” she pointed out, getting a little angry.

“What should I have said? That a woman from the campground is sleeping with me?” he teased.

“You’re an ass!” she stammered in frustration, her anger building. She stood and made an attempt to leave.

Sam blocked her path immediately. “You’re not going anywhere, Rachel. You’re sick,” he told her angrily.

“You’re sick if you think I’m going to stay within fifty miles of you,” she yelled at him, pushing at his chest in an attempt to get him out of her way. “Telling those sweet old people that we’re married, and trying to have a baby no less!”

“Rachel, stop and let’s talk about this, please,” he said calmly, concerned that his teasing had upset her this much. “I’m sorry, honey. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

She struggled in his arms for a moment then looked up at him with wide eyes. He looked back at her in silence and couldn’t help but feel bad that life had been so rough for her. She stopped struggling abruptly and leaned against his chest for support.

“Sam,” she said suddenly, very quietly.

“What?”

“I think I’m going to faint.”

She barely got out the words when her knees buckled beneath her and she sagged against his body as the blackness engulfed her.

Sam’s arms were quick to encircle Rachel’s body as she lost consciousness. He lifted her easily and turned to gently place her on the bed that she had occupied the night before. He checked her pulse then quickly covered her with the blankets that were beside her.

He left her for a moment to dampen a cloth with cold water from the pitcher on the table and then returned to her. Gently placing the cloth on her face, he wiped her forehead and tenderly passed its coolness across her eyes. He lifted her head carefully to place the cold cloth behind her neck. It was only a moment later that her eyes fluttered lightly and then opened.

His face was close to hers and she found herself looking up into two beautiful but worried blue eyes. She closed her eyes for a moment and felt him moving back away from her.

“Are you okay?” he asked her quietly.

Rachel opened her eyes and nodded slowly. “Just a little weak. Sorry about fainting.”

“Don’t apologize for something you have no control over,” he told her, his voice quiet. “Do you want a drink?”

“No, thank you,” she refused politely, very aware of how close his body was to hers and remembering how good it felt to lie next to him.

She looked up at him and knew that she had to distance her feelings from him. He was dangerously close to her in more ways than one, and she didn’t like the feeling she was having of wanting him to be closer.

“Why did you have to tell them that we were married?” she asked finally.

“I didn’t tell them we were married,” he told her again quietly. “I let them assume that we were married.”

He stood and looked down at her in silence. His whole body seemed to be weighed down. He no longer stood as tall or as strong as she remembered.

“If I had known that the very idea would repulse you, I would have told them that you were my sister.”

His gaze moved away from her slowly, silently looking out the window at the campground beyond. Rachel watched him, pain gripping at her heart. She knew without a doubt that she had hurt him deeply.

“I have some work to do,” he said finally. “Please stay in bed and rest until I get back. You’re still not strong enough to be up on your own.”

He left the camper without even looking at her again. Rachel’s eyes followed him as he left then closed in frustration at the situation. She truly hadn’t meant to hurt him.

He had taken care of her through her sickness and had lost sleep because of her. She knew that he was concerned about her health and was only trying to help her. It was her own fears and insecurities that were making the situation unacceptable. Worse than anything else, she worried that she had damaged their friendship.

She couldn’t understand why she was being such a baby about things. She couldn’t help it. Whether she wanted to admit to it or not, Richard had done more than assault her. He had affected her in ways that she was only beginning to experience and was struggling to understand.

She turned onto her left side to face the center of the camper and drew the blanket up to her chin. She knew that she had to apologize. Sam didn’t deserve the way that she had treated him.

* * * *

Sam returned to the camper about an hour later. When he stepped up inside, Rachel’s eyes quickly searched his and was saddened to see the distance that he had put between them. He showed no outward sign of emotion but she knew that he was upset.

“Sam,” she called to him quietly.

He looked at her silently and waited for her to speak. She looked like she had something to say, but he wasn’t sure if he was up to another attack. He was too tired of all the crap that life had brought him to this point.

“I’m sorry,” she said finally, slowly sitting up to face him squarely. She noted the way his eyebrows rose and wondered if it was because he was surprised, or because he didn’t believe her. She couldn’t blame him either way.

“Forget it,” he said abruptly, dismissing it.

“No,” she stopped him. “I was wrong to question you. I know you were only trying to protect my reputation. You’ve always been so good to me and have always helped me. I shouldn’t have been so awful to you. You don’t deserve it. I can never thank you enough for helping me out. You really are a good doctor.” She looked up at him and hesitated, not sure if her words were good enough to express what she was feeling.

“Thanks,” he said dryly, shrugging off the compliment.

“Sam, I was not repulsed by the idea of being your wife,” she told him finally, knowing that he needed to hear it and that she needed to say it. “I was just surprised by the possibility that someone might consider me someone’s wife. It’s my problem and it doesn’t have anything to do with you.” She looked down at her hands for a moment and took a steadying breath before looking up to face him again.