Luathara - Book Three of the Otherworld Trilogy (45 page)

I bit my lip in order to keep it from trembling.  Carefully, I extracted myself from Cade's embrace so as not to wake him.  Once I was free, I studied his face in the soft light of the dying fire in the hearth.  When he was asleep, all the strain of this whole mess disappeared from his features.  I felt tears prick at my eyes.  It was all because of me and my family.  He despised his mother more than anything, but because of me and Aiden and Danua, he
would confront her once again.

Pain and anger shot through me then.  Danua and I had been near enemies up until a few days ago and now I was on the verge of losing the family I had always wondered about.  The family I belonged to.  But the Morrigan had my little brother.  Aiden, who had been so helpless in the mortal world, must be terrified and so confused.  How
powerless
must he be here, in Eil
e
?  He must think he’s in a living nightmare, and he couldn’t let anyone know, not with his autism . . .
B
ut, my mother had said something about that earlier.  Aiden wasn’t autistic
after all
. 
In the mortal world, his
magic
had been
suppressed, so much so that he couldn't even communicate properly with us.

Frustrated, I shoved my face into my pillow and let loose a silent scream
.
A
ll the events of the past several weeks went swirling through my mind, as if a tornado had picked them up.  Returning to Eile, the attack on Luathara, my
four
weeks in the Weald, learning about my magic with Enorah, Cernunnos's strange visit and the
impart
ing
of his magic, the
Lughnasadh
party at the Dagda's, the council with the Tuatha De, news of Aiden's kidnapping, the draining of the Cauldron's magic, the parley with the Morrigan and then her insufferable arrogance in my nightmare . . .

Around and around the thoughts went, scratching at the edges of my sanity until I wanted
to
tear out my hair.  Gradually, the phrases of my memories became single words;
Magic, Cauldron, Cade, Aiden, Secret, Sacrifice, Cernunnos, War
, and the one that repeated itself the most:
Morrigan
.

Suddenly, my pain and anger honed themselves into a sharp point, one aimed directly
at
the goddess
's heart
.  She had been controlling Cade’s life, my life, for far too long.  And then, in a powerful wave of realization strong enough to
sweep the frantic tornado in my mind off course and force the air from my lungs, I understood what I needed to do.  As the storm of confusion
in my brain lost its bluster,
a few words lingered before disappearing completely.  It was something Cernunnos had said to me on that balcony the night he told me I had all of his magic
, and then repeated at the council meeting with the Tuatha De
:
You must first visit the lair of the Morrigan
before you can use my magic
. . .

Hissing in a breath, I slowly sat up in bed, my eyes wide and my mind working once again.  Only, this time I had full control of my thoughts.  For several minutes I
merely
sat there, thinking hard, and finally, a plan began to form.  It was as insane as it was brilliant; reckless, crazy, and dangerous as hell.  But if I was right and it worked out, then I could save both Aiden and my new found family.  Only problem was, there was a good chance I might not be around to enjoy those I hoped to save . . .

I looked over at Cade, his face relaxed in sleep.  Tears spilled from my eyes when I thought about how
my plan could go wrong.  This c
ould be the last time I ever saw
him
. 
No Meghan, if you are to do this you must be strong, you must be willing to let him go.

Silently, I crept out of bed
, threw on a robe,
and took up residence in the tall, stuffed chair closest to the fireplace.  Three hours, the Morrigan was giving me three hours to hand myself over.  Although I had already decided what to do, I needed some time to get the details straight in my mind.  As the middle hours of the night slipped away, I fine-tuned my plan, going over every possible detail and outcome.

An hour and a half after waking from my terrible dream, I felt there was nothing else to consider; no stones left unturned.  I just needed to
remain patient and follow the script
I'd so painstakingly put together in my head.  Digging deep into the recesses of my memory, I collected the ancient words Enorah had
given
me when I'd created my little spider.  I was going to need another one, one that would hide every thought connected to my plan.  When I had accomplished that, I gathered up my courage and recalled another spell Enorah had taught me, the one that encouraged deep sleep, and padded silently back over to the bed
.  I leaned forward and pressed my mouth against Cade's ear and focused a small cloud of my magic into a tiny pebble.  I took a breath, drawing the speck of
power
up into my throat.  As I exhaled, I spoke the ancient word that went along with the spell:
codladh . . .
sleep
.  I could feel the glamour traveling over my tongue, flowing into Cade's ear so that it could take hold and keep him unconscious longer than what was natural.  I hated to do it, but it was the only way
to
guarantee
my
getting out of the room without waking him.

As the tension eased out of
Cade'
s body and his breathing grew deeper, I leaned away from him.  I sighed and ran my hand through
his
hair, down his perfect face, and over his shoulders.  I studied his skin with my fingertips, memorizing every detail because I would need them to give me strength as I put my plan into motion.  I counted his ribs, one at a time, and traced the dark ink of his tattoos.  I felt fresh tears pool in my eyes when my fingertips lingered on the scars left by the C
u
morrig that had killed him.  I pulled my hand back and leaned forward, kissing him once on the mouth, just as I had done before leaving him in the Dagda's care those many months ago.

"I love you," I murmured.

His eyelids flickered, and for a moment I thought the spell hadn't taken hold.  I released a breath of relief when he settled back against the mattress.  If Cade knew what I was about to do, he'd tie me to a chair and lock me in Danua's dungeon until the battle with the Morrigan was over.

With careful movements, I crawled out of bed. 
Cade'
s arms crept forward as I stepped away, his fingers seeking mine, but the spell held strong.  I released the breath I'd been holding and quickly found my clothes and my warm cloak, pulling them on as swiftly and as silently as I could in the dark.  Fumbling through my bags, I also pulled out Enorah's dagger and some of the hawthorn arrows from my quiver.  Pausing and glancing back at Cade, I quickly snapped a few in half, shoving the broken shafts down my boots.  They might come in handy later.

When I was ready, I turned and glanced back at Cade.  His huge frame took up most of the bed now that I was gone, his face turned towards me.  Unconsciously, I reached my hand up to my throat and brushed my fingers over the torque that had been there since spring, the mistletoe
bead
on its leather string just below it.  The torque and the charm could not protect me against the Morrigan, but they would bring me comfort because they had been gifts from Cade.

Last chance to change your mind Meghan
, my conscience told me.

Oh, how was I tempted to listen to it, but I knew that if I wanted to save Cade and my brother and everyone else I loved, I had to do this.  With one last silent pray
er
sent to whoever might be listening, I squeezed
out
the door and crept through the
dark
castle.

Luck was with me in those early morning hours because no one was awake, not even the guards posted at the kitchen door where I slipped out
,
or in the stables where I managed to saddle up Lasair in record time.  At dawn the
fortress
would be alive with activity, my mother and the other gods getting their troops and all those willing to fight ready to march against the Morrigan.  I would not be with them when they did.

As I led the red stallion through the dark city, a sleepy Meridian clinging to my shoulder and my heart pounding in my throat, I thought about my plan.  So many unknown factors relied on its success, and I only hoped that my instincts proved correct.  One thing I was count
ing on was the Morrigan's greed and cunning
.  If the Morrigan wanted to take Aiden's power, it would be easier to do so if he didn't know how to use it.  Since this was his first trip into Eile, I was betting on this
fact
and the
remote chance the Morrigan hadn't tried to get at it yet.  After all, she needed Aiden whole and healthy in order to entice me and my mother into making a trade, and something told me that stripping him of his glamour would do far too much damage
. 
Yet, i
f
Aiden still retained all of his power and if
I could somehow find a way to be alone with
him
,
then
perhaps I could teach him about his magic and then we could pool our resources and . . .

My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the grating caw of a raven.  Instantly, my senses came to life as Lasair whickered nervously and side-stepped on the road.  Meridian clenched down with her cla
w
s.

Danger
, she whispered in
to
my mind.

Yes, I know
, I returned, my head swiveling on my shoulders as I scanned our surroundings for a large, dark raven.  I had been so caught up in my contemplation that I hadn't noticed we'd reached the edge of the city.  Ahead of us stretched the hilly, wooded farmlands of Erintara, behind us
,
my mother's castle and Cade.
  Of course, t
he entire landscape was
currently
cloaked in darkness, but I could just make out the
vague
shapes of trees, hills and buildings.

The raven cawed again, snapping my
attention
forward.  When I finally spotted it sitting in a nearby oak
tree, I released a soft gasp.
  The bird was large, but not nearly as large as the Morrigan was in her raven form. 
And it was pure white. 
Nervous, I clicked Lasair closer, and the stallion obeyed me without any trouble.

Now that I was sitting just below
the giant bird
, I could see it better. 
The creature was blind in one eye, a great scar running down the side of its face, so it tilted its head to study me.  That's when I noticed the
feathers covering its ears. 
Despite the darkness, I could tell t
hey were red, just like Meridian's.  A spirit guide.  And not just any spirit guide, the Morrigan's spirit guide.

Fighting back the urge to blast it with my magic, I took a deep breath and said
with a shaky voice
, "Tell your m
aster
I've decided to hand myself over to her.  I'm heading to the dolmarehn that will take me to her realm right now."

The creature shook out its ghostly feathers and groaned out a long croak before flapping its wings and heading east
, its pale form
a stark contrast
against the black sky
.  I heaved a deep breath and thought once more about what I was doing.

Once you step through that dolmarehn, there's no turning back
, my conscience told me.

I clicked my tongue and tapped Lasair with my heels.  “Come on,” I murmured as a shiver
shot
through me, "I have a job to do.”

* * *

Beyond the outer reaches of Erintara and my mother's kingdom, once the wooded and rock-strewn hills came to end, there stretched a vast reach of nothingness.  Well, it wasn’t completely empty.  There were stones and a random shrub every now and again, and small hillocks and lots of thick, tangled grass and low spots where water collected into shallow pools or deep ponds.  But the land itself was desolate and wind-torn.  Meridian, Lasair and I had passed through the dolmarehn an hour ago, the same one we'd
crossed
through just the day before with the Tuatha De
Danann
and my mother.  I had no idea exactly how long it would take me to get to the Morrigan's castle, but I knew as long as I kept heading east, I would get there eventually.
  Until then, I had only my worrisome thoughts to keep me company.

Just before I'
d urged
Lasair through the stone gate, I'
d heard Cade’s voice in my head.