Maeve on the Red Carpet (23 page)

“Oh nooooo …” I breathed.

Sam had caught everything on tape—from my spoiled rotten diva days to me snoring in the car at Boston Common. Clip after clip, I watched myself smear makeup on my tooth, fall on ice during rehearsal, and break into an Irish jig when I thought no one was looking. I had no idea my brother had been taping so much. I wanted to disappear on the spot.

Sam’s mini documentary ended with a shot of me flying into the bush during the last day of filming and then the final cut where I successfully grabbed the umbrella. If the movie hadn’t been “Maeve the Embarrassing,” it would have actually been kind of funny. But as far as I was concerned,
Red Fooey
was far from a laughing matter.

Unfortunately, I was outnumbered. The entire theater was clapping and laughing hysterically. “Take a bow! Take a bow!”

One by one, each of the film camp kids got out of their seats and made their way to the front of the theater.
The more kids filled the front, the louder the clapping became. Even Artemia and Dad went up. They
had
to—people practically dragged them out of their seats. But I couldn’t move … my feet felt like they were cemented to the floor.

Mom gave me a nudge. “Go on, Maeve. Get up there.”

“I can’t! Not after
Red Fooey
… it’s way too embarrassing!”

At that moment, a powder blue tuxedo started bolting toward me from the back of the theater. It was David Dell. And he was shouting something. “We want Red Fooey! We want Red Fooey!”

My eyes grew wide. Oh no, it was contagious! “We want Red Fooey! We want Red Fooey!” the whole theater chanted.

David got to my row and stopped. “You heard the people. Bow!” He held out his hand and Mom gently pushed. In my pink pumps, I was easily push-able. David grabbed my hand, and I went flying down the aisle.

“There she is!” cried the same very loud little boy from the front row.

The theater whooped it up all over again, and I knew I was smiling the biggest smile. How could I not? It felt awesome to stand there with all of my new friends who’d worked so hard on the film.

The only camper who didn’t make it up to the front was Maddie. She was stuck in back behind a wall of reporters. The clapping was so loud though, I don’t think anyone really noticed.

But there was one person who was missing from the front, who really deserved to be there. “Where’s Sam?” I asked David.

David’s eyes suddenly got huge. “Um, Maeve … you better look out …”

The doors of the theater thundered open and I looked up. Sam was charging down the center aisle, headed straight at me. This was probably going to be his grand finale, when he tackled me down to get material for his next big hit:
Red Fooey 2—the Monster Returns
. But instead, Sam did something completely unexpected. He jumped into my arms and gave me a giant hug.

I had to smile. “How did you ever make such a hilarious movie?”

“What can I say? I had a really funny cast …” Sam grinned and looked back at Apollo, who was sauntering over from the side, away from the spotlight. “And a little tiny bit of help,” he added in a whisper. I smiled at Apollo and I wasn’t exactly sure, but I could’ve sworn he gave me a very quick wink.

At that very moment, as the Hollywood theater applauded, I couldn’t deny it any longer. My little brother was a really talented
filmotographer
-person after all. “Hey, this is your moment. You should take a bow, Sam,” I told him.

He shook his head, smiled, and grabbed my hand. “We both should.”

And so we did.

To be continued …

(with a few Maevisms)

Art Director
—Person who is in charge of and oversees the artists and craftspeople who build the movie sets.

They’ve got to be artistic AND organized? Whoa.

Best Boy
—Best Boy is like the second in charge of any group, most commonly the chief assistant to the Gaffer. Females are also known as “Best Boys.”
Why can’t I be a “Best Girl”? Oh well.

Body Double/Stunt Double
—These peeps are used to take the place of the actor for a specific scene … like one with special effects or hard dance moves.
But don’t worry
–
I perform all my own stunts always.

Boom Operator
—You always see this sound crew dude around holding the microphone attached to the end of a long pole. But did you know the dude had such a funny name? The Boom Operator extends the boom microphone over the actors, out of sight of the camera.

Cinematographer
—The person who is awesomely good at capturing images using visual recording devices (
that’s fancy-pants talk for a camera
). The Cinematographer is also in charge of the lighting.
And don’t yawn
–
that’s a very important job!

Composer
—This one is simple. Composers write the music for a movie.
One of my personal favorite movie scopes is
Titanic.
Way to go James Horner, composer extraordinaire!

Costume Designer
—Person who is in charge of designing the costumes in a film.

My fashionista friend Katani would be very good at that job.

Dialog Coach
—This person has to be very good at doing accents, because this dude has to help actors speak like the characters they are playing.
Think Henry Higgins in
My Fair Lady …

Director
—Um, this person’s a pretty big deal. The Director has control over every single-bingle artistic aspect of the movie. I’m talking casting, editing, acting—the works.

Artemia Aaron rocks and that’s all I have to say
.

Dolly Grip
—(
True confession
–
I mostly wanted to talk about this job because the name sounds funny
.) The dolly grip is responsible for positioning the dolly, a small truck that rolls along tracks and carries the camera, camera person, and sometimes THE DIRECTOR.

Editor
—The person who edits the film.

What did you think an editor does … makes cookies?

Extra
—Extras are people who don’t have speaking roles and are usually used as fillers for a crowd scene.

Hey, everyone’s got to start somewhere, right?

Gaffer
—Person in charge of the electrical department. (Fun fact: Gaffer literally translates to
old
man.
Come on … that’s a hoot
.)

Grip
—The person responsible for the maintenance and positioning of equipment on a set.
Maddie was a terrible Grip, I’d say
.

Producer
—Head honcho in charge of a movie production in all matters except for the creative parts, which are aaaaaall the Director. The Producer must also raise funds, hire key personnel, and arrange the distribution.

Screenwriters
—Screenwriters create new screenplays to be filmed or adapt existing works into scripts for a movie, like someone did with
Harry Potter
.

Sound Designer
—He or she is in charge of the audio portion of the movie … a really important job in the movies.

Wrangler
—This is the dude in charge of all creatures in a movie who are EXTRA DIFFICULT to communicate with. Boston Holiday
didn’t have a wrangler, but I bet
Dr. Doolittle
had more than one!

Maeve on the Red Carpet t
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1. Where is Maeve’s friend, Charlotte Ramsey, going for her winter vacation?

A. Paris, France,
mais bien sur!

B. On tour with Justin Timberlake as the youngest-ever reporter for
Rolling Stone
magazine

C. Montreal, Quebec

D. Disney World

2. Maeve and Sam’s mother surprises her kids with Chinese food and a new …

A. Pink convertible Porsche

B. Guinea pig

C. Haircut

D. Boyfriend

3. What does Sam really, really, really want to do for the film camp?

A. Play Prince Harry in
Boston Holiday

B. Dress up as an Army dude and scare people randomly

C. Choreograph the kung fu fighting scenes

D. Be the filmotographer

4. According to Maddie, what is the ingredient that makes Maddiecakes so very special?

A. Calcium and fiber

B. Wheatgrass

C. Vitamin L-O-V-E

D. Hamburger meat

5. What do the kids at camp start calling Maddie and Maeve?

A. Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum

B. Princesses of Mean

C. Paris and Nicole

D. M&M (Isn’t that fabulous?)

6. On audition day, what is Maddie’s chosen mode of transportation?

A. A white stretch Escalade

B. The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile

C. A horse-drawn carriage

D. An elephant named Cinderella

7. When Maddie steals Maeve’s _________ it is the final straw in their friendship.

A. Muffin tops

B. Fabulous movie idea

C. Goose that lays golden eggs

D. Imaginary friend, Lady Bird Muffleufagus

8. Why doesn’t Maddie want David Dell to play the romantic male lead?

A. His radiant handsomeness will outshine her.

B. He’s too short.

C. He was disrespecting Maddie’s momma, and no one disrespects her momma.

D. No one knows why because Maddie is crying too hysterically to explain.

9. Who is Maddie’s date to the Hollywood movie premiere of
Boston Holiday
?

A. Fifty trained swans

B. Apollo Aaron

C. Justin DePre, winner of the hit reality TV show
U.S. Superstar
D. No one, because she was MEAN!!!

10. Sam’s movie, featuring Maeve, is called …

A.
Red Fooey

B.
Little Orphan Annie Part Deux

C.
Spidermaeve

D.
Big Sister and the Beast

ANSWERS:
1. C.
Montreal, Quebec
2. C.
Haircut
3. D.
Be the filmtographer
4. C.
Vitamin L-O-V-E
5. D
. M&M (Isn’t that fabulous?)
6. A.
A white stretch Escalade
7. B.
Fabulous movie idea
8. B.
He’s too short
9. C.
Justin DePre, winner of the hit reality TV show
U.S. Superstar
10. A.
Red Fooey

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