Making Me Sane (Sanity Book 2) (35 page)
“I
can’t do it.”
“Yes, you can,” Trace replies in that strong, sure voice of his.
I shake my head vehemently. “I don’t think I can. This is all your fault!” He just had to joke about me having twins, and with my first ultrasound, we found out that I was. Now, I’m supposed to have not one, but
two
babies come out of me. My panic is at an all-time high. I’m not prepared for this. I can’t do it.
“Brittany,” the doctor says in a rather loud voice. “I need you to push.”
“Come on, Britt,” Trace encourages me.
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. An agonizing few minutes later, we hear a baby crying and, “Congrats, it’s a girl.”
“One more time,” Trace tells me while trying to get a sneak peek at our baby girl.
I take a deep breath and push when the doctor tells me to. I’m so tired, I just want to pass out and sleep for a few days. But then, there’s two crying babies.
“It’s a boy,” the doctor tells us.
We decided to wait and find out. We had a pair of girl names, a pair of boy names, and one of each picked out for any situation.
Trace kisses my forehead before resting his against mine. “You did it,” he smiles.
Yes, I did. Thank goodness. I was seriously worried for a second there. It’s the first time I’ve almost had a panic attack since I found out I was pregnant. Turns out, pregnancy is very good to me. I’ve felt better than I ever have. We were a bit concerned that my anxiety and depression would worsen with all the hormones raging, but it’s been the opposite.
A little while later, Trace and I are sitting on my hospital bed in my room with a baby in each arm. Our shoulders are touching and our heads are leaning against one another as we look down at our kids.
“Look at what we did,” I whisper. “They’re so beautiful.” My heart is bursting with love and I’m so overwhelmed, I’m not sure what to do with myself.
“Yes, they are,” Trace agrees. He’s holding our girl and she opens her eyes, blinking and staring. “Hey, little Amelia Taylor Lexington,” he says softly. Amelia is named after his mother. “I’m your daddy.” He shifts her toward me. “And this is your mommy, and you already know your brother. We named him Aiden Thomas Lexington.” He kisses her forehead and I start crying. “What is it?”
“I can’t take how sweet everything is.”
He smiles. “We’re blessed.”
“Yeah, we are. I love you.”
He gives me a kiss. “I love you, too.” Then, he looks at our babies. “And you and you,” he adds, making me giggle.
A nurse pokes her head into our room. “Ready for visitors?” she asks.
Has it been a hour already? The staff gave us an hour alone once we moved into our room to spend with the kids before anyone else gets to come in. Trace looks to me.
“Yeah, we’re ready.”
She opens the door wider and in comes our parents and Ben and Melissa, who is currently six months pregnant. They ooh and ah over the babies, taking turns holding them while I rest my head on Trace’s shoulder. I can’t believe our lives. From getting married, being promoted, having an amazing time in Italy, spending my first Thanksgiving away from my parents, moving into a bigger house, and now, giving birth to twins.
This year, we’ll start our own Christmas traditions with them, even though they’re so young, can’t hurt to start now. Our parents will start traveling to us for the holidays. Trace talked me into a five-bedroom house, so there’s enough room for them right now. I wasn’t sure I wanted something so big that I would have to clean, but since I’ve been pregnant, I haven’t lifted a finger for any housework. It’s going to suck when Trace starts letting me help out around the house again. But our house is beautiful with a bigger yard for Lily.
For possibly the first time, I’m looking forward to the future. Used to be, I didn’t like to think too far ahead because it’d freak me out more than anything else, but now I can’t wait to see what’s ahead for us and our children. To think of how far we’ve come, of all we’ve experienced together, and then to have this day, it was easily all worth it.
I
glance down to see Brittany has fallen asleep on my shoulder. She has to be tired. It was a long labor full of emotions. The kids decided to come a week before her due date, and I thought Britt was going to go crazy because she was so ready to have them while also terrified that they were early. These past few weeks have been hard on her. She’s been exhausted.
Two nurses come in, whispering once they sees Brittany is sleeping, and they take the babies away for a bit.
“Do y’all need anything?” Jane asks.
“Nah, we’re okay for now. Thanks. Y’all get some rest and come back in the morning if you want.” It’s like four A.M., and everyone has to be tired. They all wave on their way out.
Brittany startles awake when the door shuts louder than expected. “Where’d everyone go?”
“They left for the night. Go back to sleep. I’m sure someone will be in to bother you soon enough.”
She lifts my arm to wrap it around her shoulders as she tucks herself into my side. “Do you think we’re ready for two babies?”
I chuckle. “We probably aren’t ready for one.”
“Trace,” she sort of whines.
“We might not be ready, but we’re going to be fine. It’s going to be great. Do you know why?”
“Why?”
“Because they’re surrounded by people who love them and will do anything for them.”
“That is true.”
“I love you. Now, get some sleep.”
“I love you too.” She rests her head against me.
We’ve built a great life for ourselves so far. We have everything going for us. Great job, a home, two healthy kids, and most important of all, each other. After everything we’ve been through, we deserve this. Not that bad days aren’t ahead of us, but we were due for a year full of goodness. That’s how the past year has been. Lots of ups and only a few downs.
Being able to hold my wife after she gave birth to my son and daughter might just be the best thing that’s happened so far. Sure, there are now two people for us to constantly worry about and drive us mad for the rest of our lives, but we can handle it.
When worse comes to worst, we have each other to make us sane.
H
ey, y’all! As someone familiar with depression and anxiety firsthand, characters who deal with these issues are my favorite to write and one of which I am most passionate about. To learn more about these topics or to learn ways to seek help, consider checking out the websites of the
National Institute of Mental Health
,
Anxiety and Depression Association of America
, or the
American Psychological Association
.
Never be afraid to ask for help—for yourself or someone you know who needs help.
Thank you, Kristalyn Thornock. Just thank you.
Thank you, Heidi Grubb, for taking the time to provide feedback.
Thank you, Shannon Page, for editing my book and for always being a pleasure to work with. I look forward to working with you again!
Thank you, Robin from Wicked by Design, for working with me. I can’t say enough how much I love these covers!
Thank you, Julie from JT Formatting, for taking my book, putting the final touches on it, and making it beautiful. You are the best formatter ever and are always fantastic to work with.
Last but not least, thank you, reader, for taking the time to read this story.
L
indsay Paige is the author of multiple Young Adult, New Adult, and Sports romances. She has also coauthored sports romances with Mary Smith. Along with writing, she loves reading, watching hockey, especially the Pittsburgh Penguins, and finding funny terrible puns and recipes on Pinterest. All the while, she is also focused on completing college.
Lindsay resides in North Carolina and is inspired by the world around her and the people in it. She is currently working on numerous solo works.
Lindsay has written the following books/series:
Bold as Love
series
Bracing for Love
series
Sanity
series
She has co-written the following series:
The Penalty Kill
trilogy
Oh Captain, My Captain
series
The Ninth Inning
series
Author Links:
Blog:
http://authorlindsaypaige.blogspot.com/
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