Memory: Volume 1, Lasting Impressions, A Tale of Pride and Prejudice (Memory: A Tale of Pride and Prejudice) (41 page)

“I was simply taking my enjoyment from the man who dares to take my favourite child away forever.  You denied me that pleasure by conducting this courtship away from home.”  He saw Elizabeth’s eyes flash but she did not respond, waiting for a better explanation.  “He did not rise to the bait.”

At last she spoke.  “You mean that he did not become angry and flustered, and did not allow you to enjoy watching him dangle, while pleading for your blessing.”

“It sounds very weak when you put it that way, Daughter.” 

“If Mr. Darcy was a weaker man, he would have left me here and departed for London a quarter hour after he arrived.  Do you not see how our family’s poor behaviour has done none of us any favours?  Mr. Stewart was driven away because if it.  My poor dowry and the family he would have to support forced him to reject any thought of an alliance.”

“Would you have preferred him?”

“No, I was already in love with Mr. Darcy, even though there was no hope of ever marrying him.  I might have accepted Mr. Stewart, and we would have been friends.  But I love Mr. Darcy.”

“Then perhaps in this case, our family’s poor behaviour did you a favour.”

Finally losing her temper she cried out, “Can you not see that Mr. Darcy loves me so much that he will bear anything to my husband?”  Elizabeth contained her anger and spoke in a controlled voice.  “Why does Jane have the right to marry first?  She has only just met Mr. Harwick.”

“I want to hold onto Elizabeth Bennet a little longer.”  He said simply.

Elizabeth felt frustrated with his weak answer, then saw his sad expression.  “Papa, I will still be your daughter, even when my name is Darcy.  Please do not keep us apart any longer than necessary.”

He nodded and sighed.  “I could never deny you anything, Lizzy.  Forgive me for today.  Mr. Darcy is everything that I could hope for in your husband, I suppose that I wish that I was the one who gave you these things.  You are no longer the Lizzy Bennet I knew.  Mr. Darcy has influenced you.”

“For the better, Papa.”  She stood and kissed his cheek.  “Thank you.”

He patted her cheek.  “It is not too late for my sisters, Papa.  Please think about schooling them.  I am afraid that they do not have the desire to learn by themselves as I did.  It is so important.  Jane may marry a good man purely by chance.  Beauty clearly is not the only accomplishment a girl requires.”

“I will think about it.  Now, I imagine that your young man would like to return to town before the hour grows any later.”

Elizabeth turned to go.  “Are you not coming?”

Mr. Bennet shook his head.  “No, have a safe journey.”

She returned to the sitting room and was speared by Darcy’s concerned gaze.  She took a seat beside him and leaned to his ear.  “Papa apologizes for his behaviour and has given us leave to marry whenever we wish.”

Darcy closed his eyes and took a deep breath then opened them to find Elizabeth smiling warmly at him.  He wanted nothing more than to kiss her then.  Instead he squeezed her hand.  “I believe that we should begin our journey home.”

“Together.”

“I never expected to go any other way.”

25 MAY, 1809

Mr. Darcy accepted my family today.  They did everything possible to drive him away, and he was steadfast and determined.  He bore it all, the insults, the behaviour, the prospect of them coming to live with us, everything, and it was all for me.  He loves me, he truly loves me, and oh how I dearly love him!  I cannot wait to make my life with him.  Something put us together in the park that day when we first spotted each other.  God knew that we were two lost souls who needed each other.  I promise you my Fitzwilliam, I will always love you.

Elizabeth blew out her candle and climbed into the small bed.  She lay on her side hugging her pillow, remembering the feel of Darcy’s body pressed to hers, and imagined what he meant when he said there was so much more for them to experience.  She shivered with the thought and closed her eyes, wishing for the day when they would at last be together. 

25 MAY 1809

This was the most frustrating, horrifying, and joyous day of my life.  I now understand Elizabeth’s fears about my meeting her family, and thoroughly understand Stewart’s departure from the vicinity with alacrity.  Never have I met such a rude, ill-mannered, poorly managed, and uncontrolled family!  Where Mr. Bennet attempted to, I suppose, test me with his baiting, Mrs. Bennet appalled me with her almost complete disregard of Elizabeth!  I believe that she was attempting to match me with Miss Bennet, or even Miss Lydia!  Elizabeth only seemed to win her approval when the wedding, no, when my income was announced.  The sisters, I cannot describe the sisters.  Miss Lydia is frightening, spouting off comments about subjects that I pray she is parroting from eavesdropping on her mother’s friends.  Miss Kitty giggles incessantly; and Miss Mary has a propensity for ill-applied propriety that can only lead her to a life as a spinster.  Perhaps I can help them, educate them.  I will be willing to send them to school if Mr. Bennet will allow it.  I cannot imagine foisting his children into the world and expecting them to find husbands without some sort of help. 

I am overwhelmed that somehow from this home emerged my glorious Elizabeth and Miss Bennet.  That clearly is the result of the Gardiner’s influence.  I bless my parents for being loving, attentive, and caring.  I see clearly the effect of indifference on a family.  Elizabeth suffered a cruel upbringing.  I am determined to care for our children and Georgiana as my parents did.  I will protect them and provide for them.  They will know they are valued and loved.

But at the end of the day, I am engaged to Elizabeth.  She sat across from me in the carriage, her embarrassment and anger when we departed was clear, but the farther we moved from Longbourn, the more she changed.  Her eyes sparkled, her smile was warm, and her laugh filled the space with joy.  I have never had a happier journey.  I at last have convinced her of my dedication, and for that I will be rewarded with her love for the rest of my days.  For that I will bear anything.  May God bless you, my dearest Elizabeth.
 

Darcy blew out the candle on his desk and walked out of his sitting room and into his bedchamber.  Taking off his robe he looked at the empty bed then walked on to open the door to the Mistresses’ chambers.  He leaned on the doorframe and looked into the dark space, smelling the beeswax from the recent cleaning and wondering if Elizabeth would prefer to live there or if she would allow him to sleep with her.  He thought of their kisses in the woods, and remembered her desire to experience more.  “Oh Elizabeth,” he breathed, “come home.” 

Chapter 16

    
“I
tell you Bingley, it was appalling.  I have thought it over countless times, and I still cannot reconcile Mr. Bennet’s behaviour.  To what purpose would he intentionally try to drive away a suitor?  Did he realize what he was doing?  I have been told that he is intelligent, but surely that is eclipsed by his thoughtlessness.”  Darcy placed his hands on the arms of his chair and pushed back from the desk.  “My admiration for Miss Elizabeth has grown immensely.  I admit that I was frustrated with her determination not to believe my dedication to her, but now . . . I understand her fear and I am overwhelmed by her effort to educate herself.  I am committed to providing a sound education for my sister, and giving her every advantage.  She will marry well, without the struggle that Miss Elizabeth and Miss Bennet experienced.  I will do the same for our children.  I have been given a clear lesson on what can go terribly wrong when the parents of a child practice neglect.”

Bingley listened thoughtfully and nodded.  “I believe that I am the product of neglect or in my case it should be called ambition; however as a boy I was sent to schools that took me away from that atmosphere.”

“Your sisters were also schooled.” Darcy pointed out. “The Bennet girls did not have that, they were left to find their way, and I have witnessed the result.” 

“That is true, and although Louisa used her instruction to her advantage, I am afraid that Caroline has fancied herself suitable for a marriage far above herself.  Of course she had her sights firmly set on you.”  Bingley smiled and Darcy’s eyes rolled.

“That is why I have politely declined most invitations that include her company, Bingley.  Perhaps now that I am engaged I will be more inclined to be in her presence.”

“I understand, and I would appreciate that.  Perhaps appearing in your company, with Miss Elizabeth of course, she might attract more interest.  After all, her dowry is not a pittance.  Miss Bennet has an excellent suitor, even given her poor background, so there is no reason that Caroline cannot find the same.  Do you know of anyone . . .?”

“To match with your sister?  I do not like that position, Bingley.  If a match takes place and it is a failure, I do not want to be held responsible.” 

“An introduction is hardly a marriage ceremony, Darcy.”

Darcy studied his friend for a few moments and let down his stance.  “You are becoming desperate?”

“I do not see my chances of finding a bride happening easily with Caroline at home.”  He laughed and shrugged.  “She is far more ambitious than I.”

“I wonder if you would have done well with Miss Bennet.”  Darcy mused and rubbed his jaw.  “Of course you must marry a gentlewoman, and it would be best to find one who can augment your status as well as your estate.”

“Hmm?  Oh perhaps Miss Bennet would have been a good choice.  She is beautiful, and likely easy to live with, but . . . I wonder if I would have eventually become, I do not know, bored?”  Bingley smiled and Darcy’s brow rose.  “I am aware of my fickle nature.”

“Yes, so am I.  Are there any new angels in the heavens for you?” 

Bingley laughed.  “Ah, I wish there were.  No, I have been listening to you, Darcy.  I am not ready for an estate, let alone marriage.  I cannot seem to stop tripping over my tongue, and have so much to learn.  I think that the only young lady who would be willing to tolerate me is Miss Elizabeth.”

Darcy’s smile disappeared and he focussed his steely gaze on his friend.  “I hope that there are no thoughts of that nature in your mind.”

“Darcy, put down your sword.  I am not going to steal her away from you.  Good God man, you cannot be serious?”

“Forgive me.”  He said quietly.

He laughed and crossed his legs.  “You are as bad as Caroline!  I make a passing reference to Miss Elizabeth and she sees it as an opportunity to match me with her!”

Darcy’s eyes became cold again.  “What was this reference?”

“That we were friends, Darcy.”  Bingley’s smile faded.  “I am not pursuing her.  Surely her response to you should make that clear.  We are simply two people who share common worries about our fitness for this society we have entered.  We are friends.”  Bingley looked down to his hands.  “Perhaps I should leave.”

“No, no.”  Darcy sighed.  “Forgive me, Bingley.  I . . . I am jealous of any man who might catch her eye.  I suppose I will always be cognizant of how many times I almost lost her.  It is not you, it is fear.”

Bingley looked back up and saw Darcy’s sincerity.  “I understand.  I suppose I would feel the same after waiting so long.  Well, what are your plans?”

“In keeping with my determination to care well for my sister, I will deliver her to Matlock House to stay for awhile.  She will be exposed to my aunt, and be able to learn and observe how a mistress runs her household.  I see the great influence that Mrs. Gardiner had upon Miss Elizabeth, so I can only expect that Georgiana will absorb a great deal from our aunt.”

“When would you like to attend the theatre?”

“I propose that we go to see
Rozelle and Rosa
next Wednesday.  That should give the modiste enough time to make a new gown for Elizabeth, and I imagine that Miss Bennet will be purchasing some things as well.  Then, of course, I must take Miss Elizabeth to the Derby.”

“She likes horse races?”  Bingley smiled.

“She was there when I approached you last year, Bingley.”  Darcy smiled at his astonishment.  “She was yards away, and I wanted so much to speak to her.”

“And I was prattling on, and keeping you from her?”  Bingley smiled sheepishly and Darcy shrugged. 

“It was not yet time for us.”

Bingley stood.  “Well, I will not keep you any longer.  Enjoy your engagement, Darcy.  I am delighted for both of you.” 

Darcy stood and shook his hand.  “Thank you.”  He saw him to the door and returned to his study to read over the letter on his desk.  He wrote one more note and called for the butler.  “Mr. Foster, please have one of the boys deliver this letter to the
Times
, this to my solicitor, and then post these two express.”  The butler departed and he lifted his eyes to look at Pemberley, and imagined taking Elizabeth to that very spot to view her new home. 
I wonder if she will kiss me there?
  He closed his eyes and sighed to himself.

“Brother?”  Georgiana said softly.  “Are you awake?”

“Yes dear, just daydreaming.”  Darcy sat up and smiled.  “Are you prepared for your visit?”

“Yes, I am really looking forward to it.  Miss Elizabeth will be visiting frequently?”  She watched as he stood up and came around the desk. 

“I think that she will, but I will not let our aunt take all of her time.  I claim most of it for myself.”  He laughed at her pursed lips.  “What did I say?”

“She is to be
my
sister; I want my share of time as well!  Especially if I am to go to school.”

“So you will try to make me feel guilty for this decision?  It will not work, Georgiana.  After meeting Miss Elizabeth’s sisters, my decision is set.  You will go and have every advantage.  I spoke to Miss Elizabeth about this, and she said that she begged her parents to allow her the privilege of an education.  She wholeheartedly supports my stance.”