Metamorphosis (34 page)

The look on Scarlett’s face when
she opened my bedroom door that night would be forever etched into my brain. It
is what haunted me every night and pushed me to keep living every day since
then. I didn’t know what to do or what to say to her standing there, the scene
spoke for itself. I was the asshole of all assholes, the scum of all scum,
whatever else you could think of to describe the worst human on the planet. I
deserved every single thing she said to
me and more
.
It was at that moment, however, that I knew for sure that she was indeed my
soulmate
, that I needed her in my life forever. I had never
known that I could feel pain and agony so intense until I saw the horrific look
of abandonment and disgust in her eyes. I tried to stop her but that was
impossible. She flew out of my house and out of my life as I sat naked on my
bed with some meaningless fuck huddled on the floor next to my bed. And that
was the moment that everything changed.

I knew that I needed to get my
life together so that if I ever had the chance again to get her back in my
life, I could be the man she deserved. The very next day I went to the tattoo
parlor and had my butterfly put on my forearm. The new addition to her calf had
not gone unnoticed during her short-lived visit and despite everything
else,
it had thrilled me to know that she had gotten my
design permanently inked onto her body. From the tattoo parlor, I went directly
to the jewelry store. I wanted to be completely prepared to show her the degree
of my love and dedication if I ever got another chance. I looked at the ring
every night before going to bed and prayed to any and every God out there to bring
her back.

After her song, she said her
speech about how she didn’t think she could accept my apology after everything
I had done, but was asking Rat for forgiveness for whatever she did to him. If
she slept with him, I was going to kill him with my bare hands. I knew she was
purposely digging the knife in when she compared hers and his relationship to
that of Psyche and Eros, but I also knew that I deserved every ounce of pain
she inflicted on me. It made me sick to my stomach to watch their reuniting embrace
as they professed their love for each other, but I sat back biding my time. Rat
looked up and stared directly into my eyes as he held her body up against his,
claiming his victory. The look I gave him in return was full of warning and
promise. I hoped he was ready for a fight because if there was one thing I knew
for sure, it was that Scarlett
MacGregor
belonged
with me. I knew it. He knew it. And she knew it. I just needed to remind her.
She was forever my Psyche, my butterfly.

First, I have to thank my husband,
Zar
, who was by my side through this entire process.
I wrote this entire book late at night in bed, so he was literally right by my
side through the entire process. No, seriously, he could not have been more
supportive and understanding of the time I spent writing this and I love that I
made him proud.

I would also like to thank the
following:

Nicki - you were the person that first
told me that I could do
this,
you pushed me and
believed in me until I finally crossed the finish line. This is here because of
you.

Tracey – my favorite sister
and best friend, I owe you so much not just for your beta reading and editing
this,
but
for everything. I love you so much

Ela
- my imprint, what more can I
say? I’m so glad that I had you to keep me sane throughout this whole thing.
And everyone on Team
Ash,
can thank you for inspiring
the epilogue.

Trina - my manager that works for
free, thank you for listening and giving great advice, you are always there
whether I need to vent or need guidance on how to share my creation with the
world

Nina - thank you for loving books
like I do and beta reading throughout, without you Scarlett would’ve had three
arms and she would’ve cooked dinner only to go out to eat right after

Mary Jo – you are a genius,
thank you for getting the cover just perfect and formatting I don’t know how
many versions of this thing

Tiffany & Kirsten – for
helping me edit, I needed both of your watchful eyes

Mom – for everything ~ past,
present, & future

Granny – for instilling my
love of reading, I will never forget our Saturday trips to the cafeteria and
bookstore

Special thanks
to Rachel Scott, MJ Coker, & Lester Lilley
Jr
for
ideas and work on the cover.
I love the way it turned out!!