Read Moondance Online

Authors: Karen M. Black

Tags: #visionary fiction, #reincarnation novel, #time travel romance books, #healing fiction, #paranormal romance ebook, #awakening to soul love, #signs of spiritual awakening, #soulmate ebook, #time travel romance book, #paranormal romance book, #time travel romance novels, #metaphysical fiction, #new age fiction, #spiritual awakening symptoms

Moondance (44 page)

BOOK: Moondance
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“We could have been, Daniel. Good luck. I really mean that.”

Althea listened to the click, shaking her head.
He
was mad at
her
. Unbelievable. She put her hands over her face, and her shoulders shook. She was laughing, her mind bubbling.
Unbelievable
. Un-fucking believable.

You’re living your ending now, wee one, look around
.

She looked up, expecting to see Albert perched on the arms of her chair. Though
she couldn’t see him, she had heard him loud and clear. She felt a surge of energy.

Emotion, intention,
action. Whenever we do something different in the face of a similar situation, energy shifts, and it makes room for something new
.

Look around.

She couldn’t believe what she was considering. It wasn’t even five in the morning, way too early.

Tough shit.

She picked up the phone and dialed. A woman answered, her voice husky with sleep.

“Hello?”

“Could I speak with George, please?” She could hear the echo as the phone was dropped, then a low hiss as it was handed over.

“Hello?”

“George it’s Althea.”

“Well ... hello Althea Brecht.” he recovered quickly. There was a pause, and she could imagine him rolling out of bed and into the next room, sleepy and enjoying the deception. “What’s up?” His voice slowed, and she knew she was right. Fucking predictable.

“I got your message the other day —”

“Yes, well, you could have chosen a more civilized time, but ...” George chuckled. “Since you called, I saw a picture of this spectacular red-head bound in black leather and I remembered how you used to wait for me. Does that interest you, Althea?”

“Are you
nuts
? What planet are you from?? No, no,
no
. It doesn’t interest me. It’s been five years, George. We slept together for a while, we never really knew each other. That connection no longer exists for me. It’s gone.” His voice turned petulant.

“You never seemed to mind before when I —”

“You’re right, I never said so. I was a willing participant at the time. I’m saying it now. I don’t hate you George, and I don’t blame you. But I also ask that you please don’t ever call me again for that reason. You no longer have my permission to be intimate with me in any way. Do you understand?”

“I never would have if you —”

“I know, George. It was up to me to tell you and I never did.”

“Okay Althea.”

“Thank you.”

“Take care of yourself.”

“I just did.” Althea hung up.

She covered her face and laughed, hysterical gales that bubbled up from her belly and tickled her until she was curled up in a ball gripping her stomach. Princess sat on her haunches at the side of the bed, looking up at her.

“I can’t fucking
believe
I just did that. I got it, I got it, I fucking
got
it,” she punched the air over the bed, almost fell off, and laughed harder. She caught her balance and lay exhausted. She couldn’t stop grinning.

They agreed to do this for you
, the voice said.

“Thank you guys,” she whispered, feeling grateful. “Thank you, thank you thank you. I love you both so much for that.” Images danced inside her head, connecting with a clarity that was exhilarating. She raced to her computer.

She let go
.

chapter 74

ON HER WAY TO the nurse’s station, Althea took her mask out of her pocket. She felt excited, elated — for the last two weeks, she had been more productive than ever. She had written her ending. There was still some editing to do, some tweaking, but she was there. She saw Helen, who waved her over.

“Your mom didn’t have a good night.” Althea nodded, heading toward Sophie’s room.

When Sophie moved home during her remission, she became more intense than she had been before, and frequently angry. She was on Althea’s back — her new job, her past relationships, her dating life, having children, how she kept house, everything — until Althea threatened to move out.

After the dust settled, they slowly came to a new understanding of each other. Sophie had shown Althea a piece of their family history, which Sophie had kept secret. Sophie had kept mementos, letters, articles and photographs, not only about her family, but about Albert’s. Sophie also told Althea about the love of her life, Gregory Brecht, who had been married and who had died in Vietnam. About the child, Gregg, she had lost, and her desire to end her own life. About the man who was Althea’s real father. About her decision to have Althea. About changing their name to Brecht as a desperate attempt to preserve Gregory’s memory.

Althea had been stunned and furious. Her mother was a mani- pulating liar. Her whole life was nothing what she thought. It was betrayal at a whole different level. She fought the urge to run, to get as far away from Sophie as possible. In the end, Althea stayed because Sophie asked her to, and because it would be the only way she could learn more about her past. She asked questions, and Sophie answered. When she asked if her father might still be alive, Sophie said she didn’t know. Althea believed her.

Althea put on her mask, sitting in the chair beside Sophie’s bed. Sophie looked pale, her skin was translucent, her mouth slack. Her chest moved slightly, slowly measuring every breath. The intravenous tube dripped. She opened her eyes. Althea wasn’t sure if Sophie recognized her, or if she was just reacting to the activity. Althea whispered to her.

“Hi. Can you hear me today?” Sophie stared, then blinked once. Althea wasn’t sure if she understood.

“I finished my book yesterday. There’s still so much to do, editing and stuff, but it’s there, the structure is there.” Sophie closed her eyes.

“I’m back at work today, but I wanted to see you and tell you before I go. I can’t remember when I’ve felt like this, when I was writing, it was like the words were coming from somewhere else but also from inside me, you know?” She felt a warm puff of air on her left side. Helen had entered the room, and stood behind Althea, her hand on her shoulder.

• • •

LATER, ON HER WAY to White Light, Althea watched the people on the train, the business suits and briefcases, and wondered what was underneath their neutral looks as they sped toward the city.

A young man with a goatee and long, lanky legs sat listening to his cell phone with a smile on his face, his eyes soft. A fair, freckled brunette in a navy blue pantsuit, carefully avoided others’ eyes. A teenaged girl with no makeup and long legs, her red-gold hair tied back in a ponytail, met her eyes and smiled
at her. Althea smiled back.

She rested her head on the seat behind her. As the train rumbled, she got the same kind of feeling she had sometimes when she knew she was about to run into someone she knew, a full body awareness, like each cell was humming in anticipation. She looked around at the people on the train, examining their faces. A woman with fine blond hair, diamond earrings and serious eyes, reading The Economist. A black man, with baggy jeans and running shoes, listening to an iPod. No one she recognized.

Her anticipation continued, then spiked to alarm, as if she had just realized that the train in which she sat was heading for someone
something
standing on the tracks, someone who was welcoming the impending impact.
Inevitable dread
then words so clear, it was as if their owner clung to her shoulder, pressing lips to her ear so that only she could hear. At the words, emotion bubbled up inside her, her tears began to flow, and it wasn’t sadness exactly, it was gentler than that.
A deeply felt truth
.

It was always up to you
, the voice said, a voice neither male nor female, a voice she didn’t recognize, but one which felt familiar to her.

Clearly — a voice of love.

chapter 75

SOPHIE TOOK SHALLOW BREATHS. The air around her bed was thick, medicinal. The nurses came in white. Though she could no longer speak, she recognized their voices.

Sophie’s body was dying, yet her will remained. She could still shallow-breathe in ... feeling the puff of upward pull
breathe out
,
sinking into her body. When she was stronger, when she was first admitted, she practiced leaving her body consciously. One night, she rose up and through the hospital room ceiling, into a room where an old woman slept fitfully, through another, where a skeletal young man lay, kept alive by machines. She could feel the presence of his soul, confused, not ready to let go.

Today, she moved outside of the hospital into the city beyond, rising up, seeking the soul she had been close to locating just before she turned ill. She had never seen his face, but she knew he was close.

Complete the circle.

Tonight, Sophie went out of her body quickly due to her physical weakness, catapulting up into the sky and further, where the moon
was
the sky, a place that knew all of her secrets. Standing before her, a row of lithe figures stood, a chorus of attentive shadows.
What was this life
they chimed, and their voices were gentle, not judging.

I need more time
, she said, and at their nod, she felt the most beautiful music, gravity, and then her body’s narcotic ache. While she was conscious, her mind was murky and slow, like a dream. Her body was deteriorating. Again she rose up, continuing her search, returning to her body periodically, only to slip away once again. She was unsuccessful in locating him — it was as if he had left the earth.

That morning in the hospital, Sophie had watched her daughter’s face from above Althea’s left shoulder. Now she remembered Althea in many forms simultaneously: as a young girl hunched over the Ouija board, her golden ponytail flopped over her shoulder; as a willful teenager wanting to know about her family origins; as a vulnerable and broken-hearted woman; as a strong and immovable force in the wake of Sophie’s efforts to control her.

She remembered the fight they had the first night Sophie came home from the hospital. Sophie thought she was close to losing Althea for good. She couldn’t let that happen, so Sophie decided to tell her the truth. For a while after that, she thought she was going to lose Althea anyway.

Instead, here they were.

Her spirit soaring into the sky, Sophie found Althea sitting on the GO Train, her head leaning back. Sophie plucked images from Althea’s memory: Althea sitting in water, flames licking up over the rim of a silver chalice held between her knees, Althea leaning back on a glowing red swing set, a spectrum of light emanating from her chest. As she
swung, her long hair streamed behind her, and a magnetic net extended
out over the lake and beyond, gaining power and contracting, while
Althea’s color changed to luminous gold. Althea sitting at her computer, her eyes just above the screen, her fingers typing quickly, without hesitation, filling page after page with her creation.
Althea’s creation
.

Sophie had asked for more time. Instead, she received understanding. She was not the director of Althea’s life. She was a loving witness. Nor could she control all aspects of life and death itself, no matter how great her desire.

It was always up to you
, Sophie thought.
Had nothing to do with me
.

Gravity pulled. She felt the throb in her flesh, and the heaviness of the earth as she moved into her body. She tried to open her eyes, and it was as if she was under water. She could hear the echo of a voice beside her. Helen. Helen was reading to her. Or was she praying?
It didn’t matter
.

Sophie closed her eyes and saw Althea’s face, her eyes an oceanic mirror of Sophie’s own.
It is enough. This life is enough. I understand now
. She felt the center of her body shift
Go just behind your eyes
the voice said
that place we all have
.

Breathe in
Sophie’s chest moved, barely noticeable. She felt a tickle on the roof of her mouth
Breathe out
back to the small place in her center.
Breathe in
the tickle expanded, a warm light behind her eyes
It’s okay
said the voice and Sophie stopped breathing, feeling tightness, intoxication and then a mild pull
thuck-sound
, as she let go, rising, looking down at her lifeless body, at Helen leaning over her, at Althea speeding into the city, awake, frantic.

Sophie rose through the roof, and into the sky until the hospital merged with the splay of city lights. Here, she found herself among the stars, sparkling on blue-black velvet. She went into the darkness, her back to the earth, unafraid, ascending further until she recognized the feel of the music.

As she rose, her grey chorus was there for her, nodding, and then it was as if a veil of understanding was lifted. All of her past lives
on earth were assembled before her, hundreds and more, the whole of who she really was, men and women, long lives and short ones, violent and peaceful deaths, families and times of solitude, power and service. Places where she learned courage, where she was controlled by fear. Lives when she hurt others, sometimes the victim, all of her experiences balancing each other in perfect alignment, presented in a powerful emotional mosaic.

BOOK: Moondance
5.42Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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