More Than Scars (41 page)

             
My room was dark so I flipped on the light, wanting to locate my slippers and my cell phone. The only people important to me had been in this house tonight so I hadn’t expected any messages.

             
There was an envelope on my pillow. I frowned, and then smiled. I wondered if it was a gift from Liam.

             
I picked it up and shook it. There was definitely something in it. I tore the envelope carefully and pulled out the letter. Sitting on the bed, I laid it in my lap and then carefully tipped the envelope for whatever was jostling around inside it.

             
I opened my palm and let it fall into it. A single gold ring. It was a man’s ring. My brow could not have crinkled more. I studied the simple ring for a moment and set it on my thumb…it was far too big for any of my other fingers.

             
“What in the world?” I whispered.

             
I threw aside the envelope and reached for the letter. I unfolded the carefully folded letter and let my eyes adjust to the handwriting on the page. It was not the script I had come to recognize as Liam’s.

             
My whole body went cold as I began to read.

My Dearest Nerissa,

              So we meet again! Our dance tonight was much more enjoyable than our last visit. I would like to express how wonderful it was to see that lovely face up close not laced with terror…unlike my last glimpse of you. As you can see…it is very simple to make myself visible to you when I choose but I have been here all along my lovely. I have watched you blossom into who you are today. This brings me to the reason of my letter.

             
I do not like this attachment you have formed with your young man. Has he watched you…has he followed you all of these years to be sure no untoward person touches you? NO! I have!  I will destroy anyone who becomes an idol to you. Did you not learn that with your own Daddy? You have done well keeping to yourself…only for me…only for me. You have grown bold in this new love. If you want those you love safe…you will keep yourself only for me.

             
Meet me where we first met and we will discuss…you have made a fine mess of my plans for you. But I adore you still.

             
Yours always…..

            
 
The man who had stolen a dance was my father’s murderer? He had touched me? He had called me beautiful? I trembled and looked down at the ring in my hand. It shook in my fingers as I turned it in the light. The inscription on the inside read. “To my dearest Ethan.” Ethan Meadows…my father. This was his ring. Bile rose in my throat. I threw down the letter and the letter onto my comforter and ran to the bathroom to lose all of the contents of my stomach.

             
Clinging to the porcelain of the toilet I shook and retched and began to sob. How could this be…after all this time? All this time he had watched me.

             
And I felt the numbness setting in. I couldn’t let it overtake me! No, I had a job to do! I had to protect those I loved! I had to…I had to leave. I had to get out of here.

             
My body shook again and I felt and overwhelming need for him. I needed Liam. If I could just have him I would be okay. I’d be okay.

             
“Rissa?” The bathroom door on the girl’s side opened slowly.

             
The soft voice had me sitting up from my crouch. My stomach was empty but I still felt touchy. I swallowed and smiled up at Brianne weakly.

             
“Are you sick?”

             
I nodded and pulled my hair back. “Hand me my brush and that rubber band,” I said with a trembling voice and watched as she obeyed. She handed them to me with concern in the bright blue eyes. I gave her another smile as I twisted my hair up. I reached for her hand and squeezed. “Thank you.”

             
“Are you okay?” Her small hand left mine to touch my face.

             
An overwhelming need to protect her filled me and I pulled her into my arms and held her close. “Yes, I will be okay,” I whispered. “And so will you and Amelia…and your Daddy. I will make sure of that!”

             
I rose shakily to my feet and faced myself in the mirror, splashing water on my face. I brushed my teeth briskly, sensing the concerned little eyes on me. I gave her a toothpaste smile to make her giggle and then rinsed before reaching for her hand.

             
“Back to bed.”

             
“If you are sick I should take care of you,” Brianne insisted.

             
I hefted her up into her bed and kissed her swiftly. “I’m all better…I promise!” Only, I wasn’t, not yet. I really did need to see Liam.

             
I tucked her in for the third time and hurried for my room to look for my slippers. I had an appointment to make! I glanced at the ring on my bed and grabbed it and the letter up, shoving both in the pocket of my pajama pants. It was at that moment that a soft knock came to my door. I looked to my clock…I wasn’t late. It couldn’t be Liam come to find me!

             
I hurried to the door and opened it to find Stewart.

             
His kind eyes filled with concern at the sight of me, but he said nothing of my appearance, just cleared his throat. “Miss…Liam wanted me to let you know he cannot meet you tonight. Something came up. He will be in his office for some time tonight and…”

             
I shook my head. “I need to see him. He is in his office?”

             
“Yes but an emergency happened and…”

             
“I know and I need to see him,” I said softly.

             
Stewart cleared his throat. “Liam can’t see you right now Nerissa this is serious.”

             
“I am serious.” I pushed passed him, not caring if I was in my bare feet and pajamas. I didn’t wait to hear his argument. I ran down the stairs and to his office. I passed a pair of cops who were following another servant to the set of stairs to the foyer. Those were not security guards. They were legitimate police! I wondered if Al knew anything. I pushed through the doors that had once seemed ominous, not bothering to knock or wait to be invited in. I closed the door behind me and leaned against it. My eyes went straight for his desk, but he wasn’t there.

             
Walking forward, I worried my lip, coming to stand before it. Some of the drawings were still there from his birthday. I had not been in here since that day. The day he first said he loved me. My card was still sitting by his phone. It looked like it had been opened and closed a good many times and this made me smile. The album also still sat on the great desk, as did a new picture in a frame. It was a beautiful silver frame. I picked it up, since I was only able to see it from behind and my heart caught in my throat. It was a picture of me! It was me with Zosimo…in the stable…his great head against my chest, my fingers in his mane! It was beautiful! And I usually hated myself in pictures! This had to have been taken the day Ian and I took the girls riding! But how….”

             
“A gift from Ian.”

             
I almost dropped the picture at the voice. I turned to its welcome sound, setting the frame down carefully. My heart fell at the picture before me.

             
Liam was slumped in his couch. His shirtsleeves were rolled up and his head was in his hands. There was a drink on the coffee table before him. He was the picture of total desolation. It broke my heart. He still wore his mask…the police had just been here…he wouldn’t even uncover for them!

             
“He was here…right here,” he moaned. “I had him here and I just let him go.” His scarred fingers buried deep into his dark hair and he growled in a sound of agony.

             
I took out the letter and set it on his desk, but kept the ring in my pocket as I walked slowly to him. I moved his drink, stepped over his knee and sat on the coffee table right in front of him and between his knees. I reached out and touched the dark head. My fingers trembled as they ran through its softness.

             
“How did they find out?” I asked hoarsely.

             
“You know?”

             
“Yes,” I whispered. I didn’t offer up how just yet. He was still too raw.

             
“They ran prints on a whim…they matched from your fathers…” he choked on his own words. “A simple drink glass he used when we first held him here after finding him sneaking…one of the guards had a feeling and went with it…unorthodox or not.” His fingers clenched in his hair as though he wanted to yank it out.

             
I drew in a breath.

             
“He’s just an old man…that’s what I said…he’s had too much to drink!” He lifted his head and those tormented eyes were dark and wounded. “I could have ended this pain for you Nerissa…tonight. Ended the wondering…the fear. Instead I let compassion get the best of me and I set him free.” His eyes searched mine. “I failed again.”

             
I shook my head, trying to take his face in my hands. “You didn’t fail me. How could you have known?”

             
He sat up and away from my touch. I frowned at his pull away.

             
“I’m weak,” he growled. His brown eyes met mine. “Didn’t Stewart tell you I would be busy tonight?”

             
My frown deepened. ‘What? Getting drunk?” I knew he’d probably already downed a glass of whiskey when the police were here by the look in his eyes.

             
He leaned toward me and I had to remember how to breathe. His arm reached out and his lips touched my jaw, feathering gently up to my ear. “Maybe,” he growled, reaching around me for his glass.

             
I hated myself for being affected. He knew what he could do to me.

             
He sat back on the couch and raised the glass to his lips, taking a long pull.

             
“So…instead of meeting with me…you plan on getting drunk? Alone?”

             
He shrugged. “Didn’t think I could be any more of a disappointment to you.”

             
“None of this is your fault Liam,” I said softly. I leaned toward him now, setting my hands to his knees.

             
He watched me with careful brown eyes. He looked so mysterious and beautiful in his mask. I still couldn’t get over looking him in those wonderful eyes when I spoke to him!

             
“It’s not like we can’t find him again. There is a fresh lead. Even if I did not see his face…I heard his voice…he was in this house. It is not all hopeless.”

             
His eyes closed.

             
I sighed. “If you want to get drunk tonight…get drunk.” I tapped into my bold only when I was with Liam side and crawled swiftly into his lap. I smiled at the beautiful surprised eyes that opened to mine and took the drink from his hand. “But if you get drunk…I won’t let you do it alone. I had a creepy ill feeling about him too…so maybe it was my fault?” I took a sip from the glass and winced as the amber liquid burned going down. Oh this would be rough if I had to keep up with him! I was a wine girl for sure!

             
A slow grin parted his lips, and he took his glass back. He turned the glass so that he could sip from exactly where I had…that was kind of sexy. He took a long drink, as if he was drinking a glass of milk. He handed me the glass and I took another drink.

             
This time he chuckled at my face. “I would drink you under the table little girl.”

             
I frowned…took a look at what was left in the glass…maybe a shots worth and lifted my brow to him before throwing it back. It burned like fire and I didn’t know if I was going to be able to breathe again. I started to sputter and fight to draw in a breath. I felt the cup taken from my hand and then there was his mouth on mine, chasing all the burn away with his lips and tongue. A different kind of burn took its place.

             
My hands found themselves in his hair and his arms crushed me to his chest.

             
Liam Byrne knew how to kiss. I didn’t have many to measure him by so in correction…Liam Byrne knew how to kiss me! My body was in instant response mode to his.

             
This is how we could forget for a moment…how we could muddle our memories and at the same time clear our heads!

             
One of his hands moved to the small of my back, pressing me nearer to him. I nestled into his chest. His other hand reached up to grip the back of my neck gently. He held me firmly and slowed his kiss now, as if to savor it.

             
He tasted like whiskey and sweetness and his lips were so soft. I wanted more, but he held me firmly and came at me tenderly. There was no rush in him anymore…there was only worship and an underlying excitement that he was holding at bay. Liam was good at hiding almost everything…why wouldn’t he be good at controlling desire as well?

             
“You want me,” I whispered against his lips.

             
“Do I?”

             
“Yes,” I sighed, brushing my lower lip against his upper lip, growing frustrated when he didn’t respond. “So just kiss me like you really want to.”

             
He tilted his head. “You are so sure I want you?” He tisked gently with his tongue. There was a teasing glow in his eyes.

             
I smiled wickedly at him. “It is not difficult to tell when a man desires you Mr. Byrne…especially when you happen to be sprawled on top of him with not an inch of separation! Do you want to continue teasing me?”

             
He blushed

             
My heart fluttered. I smiled and kissed his beautiful mouth. He responded with more enthusiasm now and let go of his grip of me. His lips moved to my neck and I sighed. “Do you love me Nerissa?”

             
His words had me pulling back to look him in the eye. Of course I loved him! The fact that I had to say it seemed ridiculous…but I wanted to say it. There was still one matter.

             
“Do you trust me Liam?”

             
He cleared his throat. He swiftly took me off his lap and got to his feet.

             
I jumped to mine as he moved for the door. “Liam,” I cried with disbelief. There was no way he was leaving!

             
He came to the door and deftly turned the lock.

             
I was silenced. My heart thumped in my chest.

             
He turned back to me, stalked me like prey and pulled me against his chest. His lips came to my ear and I shivered. “I will not be interrupted with you again.”

             
I looked up at him now. I saw the fear and uncertainty in his eyes…but I saw the trust there too. We had come to that moment. I tugged his hand and made him sit down again and quickly straddled his legs, making myself comfortable in his lap. His hands came to rest on my hips.

             
I took in a deep breath and ran my hands gently up his chest, over his shoulders, up his neck and into his hair. I leaned in and kissed him sweetly. My fingertips touched the tie of the mask now and I paused. I felt his own fingers flex at my hips.

             
I pulled the tie with one hand and held the mask carefully with the other. His eyes closed and it broke my heart. “Open your eyes to me,” I whispered. He obeyed and I could see his agony. “I have loved you from the moment I met you Liam.” My voice trembled.

             
“I trust you.” His voice was rough and lovely and his eyes slammed shut.

             
I took away the mask and there was my Liam. The man I loved who had been hiding from me all of this time. The beautifully scarred man who’s very face set my heart racing at this moment. The sight was shocking at first and I took a moment just to take him in. It was sureal. I pulled in deep breaths, trying to keep the tears away, but they were there. I sobbed, wretching sobs broke from me and he was trembling, unable to open his eyes.

             
He buried his face into my chest now. “I knew it would be too much,” he groaned. His body shook.

             
I buried my face into his hair now. “Oh my Liam my Liam my Liam,” I whispered, controlling my sobs now. My fingers ran through his hair and I struggled with my emotions now. I was shaking almost as much as he was. “My love, your face,” I murmured nonsensically.

             
“I would understand if you left,” he whispered back.

             
I forced him back against the couch now and frowned at him. ‘Why would I leave?” He would not open his eyes to me.

             
He turned his face. “Your reaction. I know what I look like…”

             
“Liam,” I whispered, grasping his jaw and pulling his face back to mine. “Don’t.”

“
Nerissa I understand.” He tried to pull away, ducking his head.

I lifted his face back up, cupping it in my hands. My thumbs brushed along his jaw. “I was not reacting in fear or repulsion,” I growled. I leaned in and brushed my lips to his.
“Liam…that was joy.” I started to laugh. It was a silly time to laugh, but I had no other emotion left in me…just joy. I tenderly touched the scar now…my fingers knew it, but my eyes didn’t. “I’m looking at you.” I leaned in and set my lips to it as well and heard the deep intake of his breathing.

His warm eyes opened to me and I forgot how to breathe. “Now you are looking at me,” he corrected softly. There was uncertainty in his voice.

              I nodded, catching a break on the breathing thing. My lips traced the scar once more and I returned to his lips kissing him deeply. “I love you,” I sighed.

             
He reacted swiftly. My body was rolled beneath his on the couch and his body settled over me as he took my mouth possessively.

             
The excitement I felt could not be matched. The aggressive possessiveness he used was what I loved about him, and I let him take control. My fingers found their way into his hair and my knee hitched over his hip.

             
There was a knock at the door and Liam growled deep in his throat. He used his great shoulders to prop himself up and glared at the door. “Yes,” he barked roughly.

             
“Sir, the police have returned.” It was Stewart.

             
Liam dragged in a deep breath and a tremor ran through the great body. He buried his face against my neck and tried to calm himself. “One moment.”

             
I was pulling in calm breaths too, trying to remain still.

             
“Yes sir.”

             
Liam lifted his head and looked down on me. “Maybe you should get some sleep?”

             
I looked up into the face I wanted to memorize. I traced his features tenderly and gave a slight nod. “Unless you need me.”

             
He smiled broadly. “I need you,” he chuckled…just…not with the police. Those brown eyes held me captive.

             
I lifted my face and kissed him. “You will have to remove your sizeable weight then Mr. Byrne.”

             
He sighed and got up, easily taking my weight with him. He sat up on the couch and held me there, straddling his lap. He pressed his face into my neck and breathed in deeply. It was then that reality again set in for both of us.

             
A chill ran down my spine. “Why are they back?”

             
“Don’t worry about it my love.”

             
“Liam…” My arms tightened about his neck. “I have something else to tell you. I don’t just know about him being in the house.” I sat back reluctantly and reached into my pocket. Carefully I held out the ring. “It’s my…my Dad’s.”

             
His eyes lifted to mine. Fear swept through the dark depths of his own. “Where did you find this?”

             
My fingers were trembling again and he gently took the ring from the palm of my hand so I wouldn’t drop it. I blinked back tears.

             
“Nerissa?”

             
“My room.”

             
He swallowed hard and his hand trembled as he clenched his fist around the ring. “I want you to go up now so I can speak to the police. Make sure your door is locked…the girls too. Wait for me there.” He wrapped his arm around my waist and stood to his feet. He held me until my feet were firmly planted on the ground. His eyes held mine and then he dipped his chin to kiss me softly. “I love you…I will make sure this is made right.”

             
I nodded, lifting up on my tiptoes to kiss him back. It earned me a smile that made my tummy flutter. He turned me toward the door. I peeked over my shoulder. “Do you need help with your mask?”

             
His eyes softened and he shook his head. “I think my time of hiding is over.”

My heart leapt and a feeling of joy warmed me to my toes despite the chill of fear that had overtaken me.

He leaned past me to open the door to Stewart. Stewart looked relieved to see us both.

             
As if to prove his point, Liam stopped me before I left and turned me back, right in front of Stewart. He lifted my chin to meet his gaze. “I won’t be long.” He gifted me with a smile.

             
I smiled back, especially after hearing Stewart’s pleased murmur. My hand lifted to his face and I brushed a thumb over the mark I was starting to adore. He turned his lips into my palm.

             
“Wait for me,” he whispered.

             
I reluctantly left my man behind and hurried back to the rooms. I entered the girl’s room first, locking their doors and then back into my rooms, locking my own. I locked the door leading to Liam’s room too. I sat on the bed and then jumped when my phone began to buzz. I grabbed it up. It was late and I knew a call this late could only be bad news. My heart sank at the caller identification.

             
“Al,” I whispered hoarsely. “Oh my God Al, you will never believe…”

             
“Riss come home…now.” His voice was a dead panic.

             
“I can’t,” I cried. “The police are here…there was a letter…Dad’s ring…” I began to sob. I covered my mouth. I didn’t want to wake up the girls.