Chapter Eighteen
Mizan loosened his tie as he walked out of the District Attorney’s office a free man. After turning state’s evidence he was a free man. He had told the police all he knew and had turned snitch on every hustler in the city he knew of; nobody was out of bounds. He figured that he was killing two birds with one stone by getting rid of the competition and negotiating his freedom. In return for the valuable information, he was given his life back. The D.A. publically dropped the charges against Mizan for lack of evidence. He would be the new hood star for beating the case, but in actuality he was a rat.
Rich waited outside the county courthouse. When Mizan emerged they slapped hands and embraced slightly.
“Welcome home, baby boy,” Rich stated.
“Get me out of here, fam,” Mizan replied as they sped away. As soon as Mizan made it home he made his way to the kitchen and pulled a Corona out of the refrigerator. The flashing message button on his phone was blinking furiously and he pressed play as he began to walk out of the room. He paused when he heard a woman’s voice.
“Hi, I’m trying to reach Mizan Simmons. My name is Donna Herring and I am a nurse at Con-centra Medical Center. A Ms. Raven Atkins has been in a car accident and we are trying to reach her loved ones. I found your information in her cell phone. She is badly hurt and we wanted to make sure that her family was informed of her condition. Please give me a call back when you receive this message. I can be reached at 816-891-0000.”
Mizan smiled when the message ended. “You hear that?” he asked.
Rich nodded. “What do you want to do? You want me to take care of her?”
“Nah, I want her alive. Find out what city has the area code 816 and get to that hospital. Take one of the li’l niggas that ain’t afraid to make some paper. Tell them I got a job for ’em.”
“Fuck I need to take a soldier with me for? I can handle it,” Rich assured him.
Mizan shook his head in protest. “I don’t doubt that you can, but if Raven sees your face around her way, she’ll run. Take someone with you that she doesn’t know and make sure she comes back here in one piece. I want to see the look on her face when she sees that I’m out.
She thought she could get away from me. She doesn’t leave unless I let her ... and I’m not letting go until she’s in the dirt.
Beep! Beep! Beep!
The sounds of the hospital machines filled the room as Ethic sat at Raven’s bedside. When Morgan’s school called him and informed him that she had not been picked up after classes had ended, he knew that something was wrong. He had ordered all of his lieutenants to hit the city until they found her. When he became aware of her condition he rushed to the hospital and he had not left her side since. Red eyes and stress lines revealed his worry as he leaned over with his face buried in the palm of his hands.
“Don’t you think you should go and get some rest? You’ve been here for three days,” one of the nurses said as she injected morphine into Raven’s system.
“I want to be here when she wakes up,” Ethic stated. “How is she?”
“She’s still in critical condition. We’re doing all we can for her. She probably just needs time to heal. Her injuries are quite extensive. It’s probably better that she is sleeping, because the pain would be unbearable for her at this point,” the nurse revealed honestly. “Is there anyone else that we should call? Any family? We tried reaching some of the contacts in her cell phone before you showed up, but no one has called us back.”
Ethic shook his head. “No, there is no one. I’m all she has,” Ethic stated. He had left his daughter and Morgan with Dolce. She had been calling him day and night, but he never answered. He knew that she would urge him to come home, and he did not know how to explain why it was so important to him that he stay. All he wanted was for Raven to wake up. If anything happened to her he would never forgive himself. To know that she had been under the influence of drugs disappointed him, but he knew that none of that would have happened if he had kept her close. He had brought her to Kansas City and then tried to keep her at a distance. She was his responsibility, and as he watched her fight for her life, he realized that she was his heart, as well. He had fought his feelings for her because he felt that he could not trust her, but he was slowly beginning to think that it was he who could not be trusted. He had played with her emotions and drew her in, then closed her out without explanation. He prayed that he had the chance to make things right with her. Ethic had never feared anything a day in his life, but when he looked at all the machines Raven was connected to, he knew that his greatest fear was losing her.
Ethic felt another presence in the room and he looked up to find Jacob standing in the doorway. Ethic straightened his posture and glared in Jacob’s direction. Here Raven was lay up in a hospital and Jacob had walked away from the crash with just a few scratches and stitches. Ethic also didn’t appreciate the hand print that was left on her leg. Jacob had left his mark on her when he grabbed her leg and it took everything in Ethic to keep his cool.
“Did you give her the coke?” Ethic asked directly.
Jacob knew of Ethic’s reputation and he was hesitant to answer. He didn’t want to see Ethic. A confrontation with him would prove deadly.
Ethic smirked and shook his head. “I know she’s a grown woman and she did what she wanted to do, but I don’t want to see you around again. If I see you even look in her direction then things could get real bad for you, n’ah mean?” he asked.
Jacob nodded and backed out of the room while Ethic turned his attention back to Raven.
All of a sudden the monitor beside her bed went haywire and began beeping loudly, causing the nurse to rush back into the room.
“What’s happening? Is she okay?” Ethic asked as the room began to fill with hospital staff.
“Her blood pressure’s dropping! Her heartbeat is irregular!” Ethic heard the nurses call out.
“Yo , what’s happening to her?” he asked again as he was pushed out of the room. He struggled against the tiny woman who was holding him back.
“Sir, you have to let us work,” the nurse said. “I will keep you updated.”
Ethic rubbed the top of his head frantically as he began to pace back and forth, looking through the tiny window on the door to her room every few seconds.
They wheeled Raven out of the room and the pit of Ethic’s stomach felt hollow. He sat down in the waiting room and prayed. Before Raven’s accident, he had not spoken to God in so long, and it did not feel right calling in favors from him now. But eventually every knee shall bow and every tongue shall confess, and it was Ethic’s turn to turn over his earthly power. There was nothing that he could do to make Raven better. He had to put his life in God’s hands.
Help that woman in there God ... my woman. You just brought her to me. Don’t take her away so soon. Don’t do this to me again.
Uncertainty lingered in the air and hours passed before a resolution calmed his nerves.
When he saw the nurse wheeling Raven back into the room, he sighed in relief. He did not like this type of love. He had not felt this much pain since the death of Bella’s mother, but out of nowhere Raven had opened Pandora’s Box. She made him weak.
Ethic reentered the room and waited for the nurse to give him an explanation.
“Her blood pressure dipped dangerously low and we couldn’t figure out why her heartbeat was irregular,” the nurse stated. “We ran a couple, tests on her to find out why and we discovered that she is pregnant. We were picking up the baby’s heartbeat and we have stabilized her blood pressure so that it is not a risk factor for her or the baby.”
“Pregnant?” he stated in disbelief. “How far along is she?” he asked, trying to determine if the child was his or Mizan’s.
“She’s very early in her first trimester. Not even four weeks in yet,” the nurse said. “This is the most dangerous time in a pregnancy, however. She is very lucky that she did not miscarry as a result of the car accident.”
“Pregnant,” he whispered as his eyes became glassy with emotion. His heart swelled as he wondered if Raven would have told him. If someone would have asked him five years ago where he and Raven would be, he would have answered, “On two different coasts.” Today, however, she meant more to him than he could have ever anticipated. He moved his chair closer to the hospital bed. Reaching over to grab her hand, he felt connected to her in a new way.
“Hmm ... hmm.”
The sound came from behind him, and he turned around to find Dolce standing in the doorway with Morgan and Bella behind her. She raised her eyebrows in disapproval. Her irritation was evident on her face.
“I need to talk to you,” she said as she stalked out of the room, her high heels stabbing the floor with every angry step.
Ethic sighed as he stood and ushered the two girls out of the room.
“Daddy, is Raven okay?” Bella asked.
“She’s resting, baby girl,” he replied. He grabbed Bella’s hand and led the way to the waiting area. He kissed the top of her head and then approached Dolce.
“What is up with you?” Dolce asked with crossed arms. “You’ve been here with that bitch for days like you’re feeling her or something.”
“Hey, watch your mouth,” Ethic warned seriously. He wanted to handle the situation like an adult, but she was real close to him hurting her feelings.
“See! That’s what I’m talking about! You’re taking up for her like she’s your girl. When she came here you told me she was just a friend, Ethic, but ever since she showed up you have been treating me differently. Just be real. Are you in love with her?” Dolce asked. She was irate. She desperately hoped that the answer was no, but the guilty look on his face said it all. “You love her?” she asked again, outraged.
“I don’t know, Dolce. I have never lied to you so I won’t start now,” Ethic said. “Something is happening between me and Raven. I care for her.”
“You care for her?” Dolce repeated dramatically.
“I do,” he repeated. “I’m sorry, ma. None of this was supposed to happen. I would never purposely hurt you.”
“You know what, Ethic? You’re full of shit, she growled. “You got me sitting at home playing babysitter to those fucking brats while you’re waiting for your little girlfriend to wake up. I’ve been putting in my time with you and this bitch comes along and all of sudden Dolce don’t exist, huh?”
Ethic’s eyes turned cold at the negative reference to his daughter, and he stepped close to her. What he had to tell her was for her ears only. “Look, ma, I’ma let that slick shit you popping slide because I realize that I’m wrong, but I want you to look at those little girls sitting over there,” he stated as he took her chin in his hands and turned her head in their direction. He held her face firmly and continued, “Let that be the last time some stupid shit fly out of your mouth about them. I don’t take kindly to my daughter being disrespected. Do we understand each other?” he asked.
Dolce had tears in her eyes as she snatched her chin away from him. “Yeah, we understand each other, Ethic. I’m done! I don’t have to take this shit. Ain’t nobody want your ugly ass anyway. You were a meal ticket, nigga. Fuck you, Dolce seethed, showing her true colors.
Ethic nodded as if everything was finally becoming clear. Unaffected by her words, he calmly said, “That’s why you couldn’t compete with her.”
“Excuse me?” Dolce snapped.
“You wanted to know what changed when Raven came to town. I run through classless women. Fuck ’em and leave ’em then push ’em out the door with the same shit they came in with: nothing. You’re nothing to me, Dolce. She’s everything. You could never compete with her.”
Dolce stormed off and Ethic watched her walk away. He hoped that he was making the right decision. No, he was not in love with her, but Dolce had been dependable. She was loyal, respectable, and trustworthy, or at least she had pretended to be. Raven was the exact opposite, but his heart dwelled with her, and now that he knew she was pregnant with his child, he owed it to himself to see if they could work. He walked back over to Bella and Morgan, unsure of what he was going to do with them now that Dolce was gone. Together they went back into Raven’s room and sat by her side. With Bella in his lap and Morgan sitting beside him, they fell asleep as they waited for Raven to pull through.
Chapter Nineteen
Raven opened her eyes a week later. She was disoriented. She didn’t know where she was and she tried to force her sight to adjust to the darkened room. She felt as if she would die from all of the pain she was going through. She could feel every throb, every ache, and every stitch on her body as she lay helplessly in the bed, but she was grateful because she knew that after what she had been through she was lucky to be alive. The only light in the room came from the rectangular opening on the doorway and she noticed Ethic’s silhouette sitting to her right.
She opened her mouth to call his name. “E ... Ethic ... .” Her dry, raspy throat could barely choke out the word.
Ethic heard her stir and he quickly put a sleeping Bella down next to Morgan to rush to her side.
“Hey,” he greeted her as he looked down at her and rubbed her long hair gently. She could hear the relief in his voice. “Welcome back.”
She remembered everything that had happened. She could still hear the car horns blaring in her head. “How long have I been out?” she asked.
“A while ... .”
“I was so stupid. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking. I just wanted to escape ... get high and fly away. Where is Morgan?” she asked frantically. “Is she all right?”
“She’s here and she’s fine. She is sleeping. You can see her in the morning. Don’t worry about Morgan. You just rest,” he replied.
Raven held on to his hand tightly as she closed her eyes. “Are you leaving?” she asked.
“Nah, I’m not going anywhere, ma. I’ma be here whenever you need me. I promise,” he stated. “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?” he asked.
“What?” she said in disbelief. “Pregnant?” Ethic chuckled softly because her reaction was identical to the one he had given the nurse. “Is it yours?” she asked.
“You tell me,” he said seriously. “You’re only a couple weeks along, so unless you’ve been with someone else ... .”
Raven smacked her lips and rolled her eyes. “See that’s exactly why this shit will never work. You think you know so much about me, but you don’t. I’m not a ho, Ethic. I haven’t had sex with anyone else in Kansas City.” She shook her head as tears graced her cheeks. “Oh my God. I can’t keep this baby. This was a mistake.”
“Was it?” Ethic asked. “Because we both knew what could happen. I never go raw with anyone, but with you I didn’t even think about it.”
“And I was too caught up to ask,” she whispered as she touched her stomach.
“What if I asked you to keep the baby?” Ethic asked as he placed his hand over hers. “What would you say?”
“I don’t even know your real name, Ethic. Think about it? You know everything about me, but I don’t know shit about you,” she said.
“Ezra ... my real name is Ezra,” he informed her.
Raven was dumbfounded. She didn’t even know what to say. “I’ve been in love with you since I was seventeen and you played me repeatedly. ...”
Before she could finish her objection Ethic leaned over and kissed her lips gently. “I know, but when I found out you had been hurt, my fucking world went grey, Raven. I don’t know what it means or how I came to feel that strongly for you ... but I’m feeling you, ma.”
“You’re feeling me?” she repeated sarcastically.
Ethic sighed and scratched the top of his head in frustration. “You gon’ make me work for this, ain’t you?”
Raven smiled. She wanted to make him kiss her toes and jump through hoops but she knew that she would only be fronting. She shook her head. “No,” she responded with a gracious smile. “Come here.”
She kissed Ethic sensually as he placed a hand on her stomach. “You gon’ keep my seed, ma? he asked.
She nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck tightly. She pulled back to kiss him, but he put his finger over her lips, halting her.
“You gon’ do one more thing for me?” he asked with a slight grin.
“Anything,” she repeated.
“We got to get you to the sink so you can brush your teeth. You doing a lot of kissing with a stink mouth,” he stated jokingly. Her face flushed red in embarrassment, but she couldn’t help but to crack up in laughter. She covered her face in mortification, but Ethic ignored her stinky breath and kissed her over and over again. It was so unreal, but she did not want to let go.
“Wait a minute ... what about Dolce? I’m not for the drama, Ethic. I don’t want to have to fuck your bitch up. I will put it on that bitch Flint style.”
Ethic laughed at her frankness. “I don’t think that will be necessary, ma. She has already been given her walking papers.”
Raven gave Ethic a look that told him he better not be playing games, and he reassured her with a kiss.
“No more drugs, ma. I can’t have you around Bella if you’re going to be into that shit. I need you to take care of her and the child that’s growing inside of you. I got to have a strong woman behind me. So that when I’m down you can help build me back up, okay?”
Raven nodded and Ethic’s heart swelled as he held her face in his hands. He knew that their relationship would not be perfect, but he was willing to work at it. He was going all in with Raven. He knew they had a lot to talk about, but it could wait until she was better. He sighed gratefully as he sat back down. The hard part was over. She had pulled through and opened her eyes. Now he could nurse her back to health and they could move on with their lives ... together.
The doctors held Raven for three weeks, running tests and monitoring her pregnancy, before they finally let her go. As Raven watched Ethic talk with the doctor she realized how grateful she was to have him in her life. She loved the way that he treated her and accepted Morgan into his life. It was like after all this time she had finally found home and a new family to call her own. She could tell that Ethic’s feelings were genuine toward her. Every day they grew closer to one another and she admired the way he included Morgan in their lives. He treated Bella and Morgan exactly the same. When he yelled at one he yelled at the other. When he tucked his daughter in at night he made sure that he kissed Morgan good night as well. He was her father figure and he stepped up without having to be asked because he knew that Morgan needed it. That reason alone was enough for Raven to love him. He was just as perfect as she had always dreamt him to be. She admired his confidence. Despite the burns on his face he still carried the same swagger he always had. He was gangster without being malicious, confident without displaying arrogance, and caring without being soft. Ethic had the perfect combination of qualities that endeared Raven to him. Now that she had Ethic she was slowly realizing that what she had experienced with Mizan had not been love. With Ethic she was better.
As she prepared to leave, Morgan and Bella rushed to her side to help her off of the bed. Besides having a leg full of stitches and deep bruising all over her body she had recovered fully. She was extremely sore, but she welcomed life’s pain. All of the hurt that had led her to this moment in her life was worth it, because if she had not been through the fire she would not know what true happiness felt like.
“I see I got my own little personal nurses, huh?” she asked playfully as Morgan and Bella walked her over to a wheelchair.
“Yep! We decorated the house for you and everything. We are going to be your servants until you get better,” Bella said excitedly as she displayed a gap-toothed smile.
“Oh, wow,” Raven exclaimed as she pulled Bella into her lap. She held onto Morgan’s hand and kissed the back of it. “I love you, Stank,” she signed, meaning it from the bottom of her heart. Morgan had loved her unconditionally throughout the years and was the only piece of her family that she had left.
“I love you too,” Morgan signed back. Being around Ethic and Bella had made her feel whole again. She felt like she had a new family and although it was not as good as her old one, she loved them and appreciated them so much because of what she had been through.
“What about me?” Bella asked. “Do you love me too?”
Ethic stopped speaking to the doctor as he looked back at Raven and Bella. He didn’t want to put Raven in an awkward situation where she felt obligated to respond. Raven looked Bella directly in her eyes and lifted her hand to rub her unruly curly hair. “I love you very much, sweetie.”
Hearing those words and seeing Bella wrap her arms around Raven’s neck filled Ethic with great pride. There was nothing left for Raven to prove to him. She loved his daughter and that was all he could ask of her.
“I’m not trying to be a mushy nigga or nothing, but I love you, ma ... on everything you mean the world to me,” Ethic whispered in her ear as he wheeled her to his car. After hearing him say those words she felt her life was perfect. She had no idea that her past was just waiting for the right time to sneak up on her. No matter how hard she tried she would never be able to run from her past; sooner than later she was going to have to face it, including the hefty fines that she was going to have to pay and the court appearances for driving while impaired. But with Ethic by her side she felt like she could conquer anything.
Rich sat in the ambulance with a goon by his side, watching every move that Raven made. They had been waiting patiently for her to emerge from the hospital and finally after three days of staking out the entrance, she had appeared.
“That’s her?” the goon asked as he watched her get into Ethic’s car.
“Yeah, that’s her,” Rich confirmed.
“Damn, she bad as hell,” the dude commented. “That’s Mizan’s bitch?”
“Don’t let a pretty face fool you, my nigga. That snake-ass bitch is the one who got Mizan locked up,” Rich stated. He pulled out his cell phone and snapped a quick photo of Raven with Ethic. “She out here playing wifey to that nigga Ethic who used to run with her daddy ... Mizan is definitely gon’ wanna see this.”
When Mizan received the text, his hatred for Raven shot through the roof. He had always suspected her of having a thing for Ethic, but to see her kissing him confirmed his suspicions. He began to think of all the times he had had minor run-ins with Ethic.
She had me looking like a fucking fool,
he thought.
Before seeing this there had still been a part of him that thought of Raven as his girl, but now he was certain that he was going to murder her ... even if it was the last thing he did.