On
the afternoon that the news came from London of Josie's wish to see her son,
they had been discussing the greenhouse he was building at the farm.
"A
greenhouse? What would you grow in it?" she had asked, and he'd replied
that you could grow almost anything in it, proceeding to tell her of his father
who grew tropical fruit and flowers in a greenhouse in America, throughout the
year.
Lizzie
had been intrigued and wanted to know more, but he had something else to tell
her, tactfully, gently, aware of her sensibility.
"Miss
Gardiner, I have some good news. I think you will be happy to hear that a
certain person, whose presence in this neighbourhood was unwelcome to you,
appears to have quit the district."
As
Lizzie listened with obvious relief, he continued. "Your brother and I
made some enquiries, while you were in London, intending to make it clear to
him that his approaches to you were unwelcome and should cease forthwith.
But,
we were spared the trouble when we learnt he had moved to live in Derby.
I
understand he is involved in the printing trade. I trust you will not be
troubled by him again," he declared and Lizzie, smiling, thanked him for
the assurance and asked, "Does that mean it will be safe for me to go into
the village or to Matlock?"
"I
certainly hope so, Miss Gardiner, but may I suggest that it may be wise at
first to take a companion with you--your sister Laura or a maidservant or
perhaps a friend."
"A
friend?" she had said, laughing a little at the suggestion, but he had
been quite serious.
"Indeed,
and if you are in need of one and no one is to hand, may I offer myself? I
should be very happy to accompany you," he had said, in a most gentlemanly
show of gallantry that made her blush.
Lizzie
remarked that perhaps an escort might not be necessary, if Mr. Jones was really
gone from the district, but she thanked him for his kindness, all the same.
That
night, in Luton, Lizzie lay awake and turned all these things over in her mind.
She wondered when she would know what his feelings were. She wanted to hear him
speak of his affection for her. Then, she would know both his mind and her own,
for certain.
*
The
following morning, when they resumed their journey, Mr. Carr seemed
unaccountably quieter and Lizzie was concerned that she, either by omission or
commission, had offended him in some way. Acutely conscious of the value of his
assistance and fearing she may not have said as much to him, giving him an
erroneous impression that she had taken his help for granted, she began to worry.
It could not have been a particularly diverting journey for him, she thought,
accompanying a young lady with two servants and a five-year-old boy.
Lizzie
knew how much she and her family owed to his generosity and kindness. She could
not bear to think that he would feel they were not well appreciated and
resolved to set things right.
It
was mid-morning when they stopped once more, for refreshment and to water the
horses at Barnet, not far from London. It was a pleasant spot and little
Anthony was keen to exercise his legs.
Unable
to suppress her concerns any longer, Lizzie, seeing Mr. Carr standing at some
distance from the carriage, as they waited for the others to return, seized the
opportunity of their being alone to approach him.
"Mr.
Carr," she said "forgive me for breaking in upon your thoughts, but I
have not been able to thank you enough for your kindness, not only in putting
your carriage at our disposal, but also accompanying us on this journey. Please
let me say how very much we appreciate your generosity. This cannot be a very
interesting journey for you, and I fear we may have taken you away from
important work on the farm at this time of year..."
But
he would not let her continue; plainly moved by her words, he spoke quickly,
"My dear Miss Gardiner, Lizzie, there is no need for you to thank me; it
was the very least I could do at such a time as this, when you and your family
have suffered so much anguish. I do not expect gratitude, my dear, dear Lizzie;
you must know by now that nothing would be too much trouble, if I could be of
assistance to you? You need only ask. Indeed," and at this point, he
looked back at the inn to ascertain whether the rest of their party were in
sight, but as they were not, continued, "my only regret, if I have one, is
that I have not spoken earlier, before this sad news arrived; but there, I
shall say no more, for I have resolved to speak first with your father, before
I address you on this matter."
Lizzie
could hardly believe what she was hearing.
She
had imagined such a moment, thinking that when the time came, if indeed he did
wish to propose to her, he would do so formally, probably standing in front of
the fireplace in the drawing room of her parents' home. He was such a proper
gentleman, she had never dreamed that she would be listening to what was
clearly the prelude to a proposal of marriage, even if it was not couched in
the customary language used on such occasions, in the courtyard of a coaching
inn!
When
she felt confident enough to look up at him, he was regarding her with such a
look of deep concern and apprehension that she wondered if she had heard
aright.
"Mr.
Carr, do you mean..." she began slowly, trying to think as she spoke how
best to respond, but he put a finger upon her lips and said, "Please
Lizzie, do not say anything in haste; I would prefer that you wait until we
have had time to talk in private and I, having obtained your father's
permission, am able to speak openly of my feelings for you."
This
time, Lizzie knew she
had
heard right and determined to speak, saying with a degree of
confidence that quite surprised him, "Mr. Carr, I am almost twenty years
of age; you do not need Papa's permission to speak to me about anything. If
there is something you wish to say..."
Before
she had finished her sentence, his words, released from restraint, tumbled out,
as he reached for her hand. "My dearest Lizzie, as if you did not know
already, then let me say it, that I love you with all my heart and if you will
marry me, I would be the happiest man alive."
Lizzie
looked at him and smiled, and it was unlikely that he could not have understood
from her smile what her feelings were on hearing his words. The impression of
pleasure may well have been confirmed by her words, had not Anthony appeared,
at that very moment, running towards them, followed by Ellen and his nurse.
Turning
from Lizzie to the boy, Mr. Carr stooped, picked him up and, to his delight,
swung him high into the air, before placing him safely within the carriage. As
he did so, Lizzie's smile widened, as she contemplated his exuberant response
and reflected on what his reaction might have been, had she been able to give
him a more complete answer.
Once
the others were in the carriage, he helped her into the seat beside his own
and, as he took her hand to do so, she felt again the warmth and strength she
had always found so reassuring.
Throughout
the rest of the journey, Lizzie tried not to meet his eyes too often, lest she
should betray her feelings to the maid or the nurse, who sat at the opposite
window with Anthony between them, and their love would become the subject of
gossip, even before they had spoken of it themselves. However, whenever the
condition of the road required it and the lurching of the carriage afforded him
the opportunity, he would reach out to shield her from any discomfort. That she
felt no inclination to withdraw her hand from him on these occasions, letting
it lie in his, beneath the folds of her cape, was sufficient answer to his
question, for the moment.
Lizzie
knew that with Josie gravely ill, there would be no opportunity for Mr. Carr to
approach her father. Nor was it appropriate, she thought, to trouble her mother
at this time, knowing how busy she had been and was likely to remain for a
while yet. No, she thought, with a small sigh, it would have to wait until they
were all back in Derbyshire. She did wonder, though, how she would keep her
tumultuous feelings a secret from everyone until then.
As
a consequence, though the warmth of Lizzie's smile and her agreeable manner may
have indicated to Mr. Carr that the sentiments he had expressed were in no way
unwelcome and might well be requited, no opportune moment arose for them to
speak of the matter again, save for a hasty farewell before he left London to
return to Rushmore Farm. He felt rather like a man who, having received a rare
gift, was forbidden to open and enjoy it. The waiting was agonising, but
exquisitely so.
*
On
reaching Portman Square, they had been met by Cassandra and Mrs. Tate, who gave
them the good news. Josie, they said, was stronger and, with Julian and now
little Anthony here, they had great hopes of her continuing to improve. Anthony
was taken immediately to see his mother, and later Julian came downstairs to
confirm the tenderness and poignancy of their reunion.
"It
is a far more potent medicine in such cases as these than anything prescribed
by a doctor," he said. He then thanked both Lizzie and Mr. Carr for
bringing the child to London so promptly and declared that they were all more
hopeful that Josie would be much improved by Christmas.
"We
are very much in your debt, Mr. Carr. I know my wife will want me to thank you
on her behalf. We expect her to improve considerably from now on and much of
that will be owed to you," he said.
Josie
did improve and regain some of her strength and, while Cassandra and Lizzie
returned to Derbyshire with Mr. and Mrs. Darcy, Josie's parents remained in
London, staying on at Portman Square, at Mr. Darcy's insistence, to be close to
their daughter. With her faithful Susan attending upon her and the presence of
all those who loved her around her, Josie's spirits had clearly improved and
hopes were high for her recovery.
Shortly
before Christmas, Julian wrote to his parents, telling them how very hopeful
they were. Thanking them for all they had done to help him and Josie, he
proceeded to give them welcome news:
My
dear Josie seems stronger and happier, more content than I have knownher to be
in many years. She felt able to come downstairs and help littleAnthony decorate
his Christmas tree. Our best reward came that night,when she joined us at
dinner, seeming to enjoy both the food and thewarmth of the love of her family.
It was a very moving occasion for us all.
You
will not be surprised to hear that we are looking forward very muchto enjoying
Christmas together as a family again.
I
am truly grateful for all that has been done to help her, by everyone,from
yourselves, my dear parents, to Richard, Cassy, Lizzie, and Mr. Carr;you have
all been so wonderfully kind...
The
letter was both welcome and timely.
In
the wake of all this good news, Mr. Carr sought a moment alone with Lizzie,
arriving at their home with a hamper of Christmas fare from the farm.
With
both her parents away and her brother on an errand in Derby, it was left to
Lizzie to thank him and offer him some refreshments in the parlour. The maid
brought in tea and cake and Lizzie did the honours.
When
they were seated, Mr. Carr took the opportunity to remind her, as though such a
reminder was necessary, of his words at the inn at Barnet, before asking if she
had given them any thought. Lizzie had been preparing a proper little speech,
knowing full well he would surely ask this very question at the first
opportunity, but when he did, she became flustered and seemed to suffer a complete
lapse of memory. After some moments of silence, which almost caused him to
panic, she said, hastily, "Oh yes, yes I have, of course, Mr. Carr."
In
years to come, this quaint response would cause her to be greatly teased by Mr.
Carr and other members of the family, but, at that moment, Mr. Carr was rather
disconcerted by the matter-of-fact little phrase, which had become something of
a habit with her. He asked again, gently, but determined to know her meaning,
"My dear Lizzie, by that do you mean you have considered my proposal? And,
may I conclude then, that having considered, you accept?"
Once
again, embarrassed by a rush of unexpected pleasure, which left her temporarily
tongue-tied, she hesitated before saying softly, "Yes, yes, Mr. Carr, of
course," and smiled as though she was surprised that he should have to
ask.
At
this, with a great explosion of joy, he gathered her into his arms and kissed
her, before saying, "Lizzie, my darling, do you know how very happy you
have made me with that funny little answer?" and this time, before she
could even begin to respond, he said, "Why yes, Mr. Carr, of course!"
causing her to burst into laughter, breaking down the shyness that had
trammelled up her speech, letting them enjoy to the full the delight of acknowledging
openly their love for one another.
Lizzie
had never known such happiness and had neither the inclination nor the
sophistication to hide the extent of her pleasure from the man she loved, when
he told her ardently and sincerely how deeply he loved her. Later, he promised
to go away and compose a letter to her father, which he would present to him on
Boxing Day, when he had been invited to join the family for dinner.