My Gun Has Bullets (39 page)
"I've got to hold the gun."
"No problem. You can let me hold the gun."
I faked another strike at his head, and when he flinched I stomped on his foot, heel first.
"Put down the goddamn sauce and grab the crowbar. You're pissing me off."
He obeyed.
"Make sure it's in the jamb really good, then put some weight on it."
The door moaned in protest, then popped open. I shined the penlight inside, but it wasn't strong enough to breach the dark room. I held my breath and listened. No sound came from within.
While I was preoccupied, Sauce-boy took the opportunity to swing the crowbar at me. Luckily, my catlike reflexes switched on and I ducked before he took my head off. I shoved the gun in his face and he froze.
"Sorry. Crowbar slipped."
"Drop it."
He complied.
"Into the house. Stay quiet or the last sound you'll hear is your brain exiting through your eye sockets. It's sort of a
bang/slurp
sound. Trust me, you wouldn't like it."
bang/slurp
sound. Trust me, you wouldn't like it."
"This probably isn't new information, but you're kind of a prick."
"You caught me on a bad day. Now move it. Nice and slow."
I marched him three steps into the dark house, unable to see a damn thing. There wasn't a single light on, and all the curtains were drawn. I smelled incense, and something under it. Something funky.
My partner took another step, made an
uumph!
sound, and pitched forward.
uumph!
sound, and pitched forward.
I flashed on the penlight to see what he tripped over, and saw it was a naked dead guy with his throat ripped out.
While sauce-boy flailed around like a fish, I played the penlight around the floor, noticing something distinctly odd. The throat wound was so deep the neck vertebrae were exposed.
But there was surprisingly little blood.
We hope you enjoyed this excerpt from SUCKERS by J.A. Konrath and Jeff Strand, now available in a Kindle edition.
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