My Sweet Demise (Demise #1) (19 page)

I ignore a text from Becca.

Becca: Have you exploded yet?

She had no idea.

I find Trevor’s text, take a deep breath, and then do it.

Me: What are you doing tonight?

Trevor: Hopefully hanging out with you.

I quickly text back before I lose my cool. As I do my stomach turns and my hands tremble. This isn’t me.

Me: I’m having a party tonight. Want to come?

Trevor: I would love to come.

Me: Is it weird we barely know each other?

Trevor: We’ll get to know each other tonight. I promise. ;)

What is he winking at?

Right before I text back, Kent barges into my room. He eyes me, my guilty look, and cocks his handsome head to the side. He looks freshly showered. His blond hair is styled and he looks so good in a pair of red jeans and a black shirt. His black high-top sneakers only add to the appeal.

“What are you up to?” he accuses.

I decide not to lie. “I’m talking to Trevor.” I watch his reaction like a hawk.

His entire face turns as red as his jeans. His mouth thins and he touches his stomach as if it hurts. “We’re playing like that?” he growls, eyes leaking their evil all over my bedroom. “You’re going to lose. You’re going to lose harder than I win.”

“Who say’s we’re playing? You don’t want me. You want Willow, and Auburn Hair, and girls like Samantha. Why can’t I be with a man who actually wants me? And Trevor wants me, Kent. He’s practically begging for it.”

His expression is pure wild rage. “You are such a…” He can’t or won’t finish. “All right, Rain. You want Trevor, you have him. I’m just a guy to you. Remember one thing. You’re just a girl. I can have whoever I want in place of you.”

“You’ve shown that already. Get out of my room. I have to get dressed.”

Why are we hurting each other? Why does the idea of adding to our pain make it seem less real?

“What are you going to wear?” He opens my dresser and starts rummaging through my clothes. He picks a pair of ripped jeans in a size too big, missing most of the jewels on the pocket, and a tunic style shirt that makes me look like a bag. “This is perfect.”

I roll my eyes and text Trevor my address.

I don’t know what’s gotten into me. Logic suggests this isn’t going to go well. I’m usually a logical person. I’m not operating with my brain. I’m operating with my emotions, something I never do, because I know your emotions can be misleading. Like right now. I want to make Kent suffer the way he has me. I know it isn’t right of me. It’s not even fair. Involving Trevor is going to backfire. I know these things. Yet I can’t stop myself. Last night Kent took something from me. He showed me my fears were fears regardless of how true they were. My wants were wants regardless of whether I could have them.

I resent him for that.

I resent Kent for being exactly who I can’t have.

As he sets out another hideous outfit I call Sam and invite her to the party. She agrees instantly. I have a feeling why, and he’s staring at me in disgust. Next I call Sophie.

“What’s up, drunky? Did you get laid last night?”

I lie on my back, ignoring Kent’s eyes on me. “Sort of.”

She hoots. “You’re welcome.”

“I said sort of. What are you doing tonight?”

“Nothing. My boyfriend has to work. Why?”

“I’m having a party. I want you to come.”

She laughs. “You don’t sound like you’re happy about it.”

“Sam said she’d pick you up. And stop reading my mind, witch. Leave your tricks at home.”

“I plan on making you happy about it,” she warns with an evil chuckle.

“Bye, Sophie.” I hang up and toss my phone on bed.

“Sophie’s going to get you into trouble. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“You got me into trouble,” I point out. “Get out. I want to get dressed.”

He ignores my words and lies next to me, turning his face toward me. Our noses almost touch and I can smell mint on his breath. His lips look unbearably inviting. I want what we had last night.

Reaching over tentatively, I touch them, dragging my fingertips over his smooth supple flesh. “I want to kiss you.”

Sadness enters his eyes. “I’m not good at this, Rain.” His words whisper against my fingertips. “I never have been.”

Leaning over slowly, so he can pull away if he wants, I press my lips to his, inhaling the taste of mint on his breath. “Me neither.”

His hand touches my lower back, pulling me closer. “I can’t believe I can’t have this.”

I’m glad there will be alcohol to forget him. Is this what he feels? This overwhelming desire to forget? When did I start running from Kent Nicholson? Probably about the same time he answered the front door wearing nothing but a pair of black jeans. I recall that man. All he wanted was a wing-woman. He warned me not to fall for him. I gave him everything he never wanted. But the same could be said for him. We are so wrong for each other.

I have to get over him, forget his effect on me and the taste of his lips. I bolt off the bed and tap his foot. “Out.”

He doesn’t move. He simply watches me and then puts his hands behind his head and stretches out his long body on my bed. “No.”

I give up and go to my dresser. I sift through my clothes and pick a pair of pink denim shorts. I find my black top that shows off my belly a little, and couple the outfit with my black thong and bra.

Turning my back to Kent, I begin to undress. I’m not wearing any panties and my t-shirt bra is thin and barely there.

“Your ass is beautiful,” he compliments. “Your tiny waist too. Honestly, Rain? Your body tortures me.”

I can feel his eyes all over my body as I undo my bra. I shove his words out of my brain. I am standing completely naked in front of Kent Nicholson. That nefarious hunger is back. It knows Kent’s here and it wants him. I turn around and grab my clean panties, stepping into them as I attempt to keep my back to his.

“Interesting,” his deep voice rumbles.

“What’s interesting?”

“You shave. I noticed it last night, but your lack of pubic hair wasn’t on the top of my list of concerns. Your tight pussy, however, made the top of my list.”

I guess I don’t keep my back to him completely. A blush creeps over my skin. I try not to think about what I’m doing.
Just get dressed. Don’t maul him.
“Kent,” I warn.

“I figured you’re a
virgin
. Why shave your pubic hair?”

“Because I can. Why are you looking at my vagina anyway? Can’t I have some privacy?”

“I want your vagina. That’s why I’m looking at it. I want to taste it, fuck it, and own it.”

My knees nearly buckle. I stand there with my back to him, breathing so hard I know he can hear it. I’ve never wanted to attack someone in my entire life the way I want to attack him.

Without responding, because I have nothing to say, nothing at all, I put my bra on and then my shorts. Lastly I put my black top on and then grab my makeup bag. Kent’s face is reflected in my compact as I apply it. His handsome, breathtaking, painful face. I look down and grab my foundation. After last night I need a layer of it.

“I invited Auburn Hair.” He puts his cell back in his pocket.

I close my eyes and break. “Good for you.” I grab my gold shadow and apply it with a shaking hand, bringing out the brown and green color in my eyes. After some liner and mascara I am hypnotizing. I want to be hypnotizing tonight. “Can I borrow a condom tonight? I don’t have any. You know, because I’m a sweet untouchable virgin.”

He laughs darkly. “You’re not hooking up with anyone. If you don’t want me then you’re shit out of luck. I’ll make sure of it.”

I whirl around and throw my peach gloss at him.
But I do want you!

He moves out of the way and picks it up, twirling the tube around with ease. “Willow despised gloss. She was a red lipstick kind of girl.”

I picture the onyx beauty wearing red lipstick. “Where did you two meet?”

“At a party. We locked eyes across the room and that was it. I was done for.” He smiles sadly. “Before her I dated girls, but I never loved them. I liked them enough to try, but with Willow I had to have her. I cleaned my act up. I deleted all the women from my phone. Stopped hooking up with other girls. We were so damn in love I asked her to marry me after being together a year. I was sure we were going to be together forever. And then one night we got into a fight over something stupid and I went out and got drunk and ended up screwing some random chick. She packed her shit and was gone the next night. I tried to get her back but she met another guy. Another guy, Rain.” His voice is gruff and pained. He blinks like he’s blinking away tears but his eyes are dry. This dark look enters them as he keeps going. It gives me goose bumps. “Apparently they’re in love, her and this other guy. She says we were too young to know what love was. He’s older. He’s rich. He’s better than me. He knows what love is.”

I can’t stand the way he talks about her. There’s so much longing in his voice and I’m sitting right here longing for him the same way.

Without a word I leave the room. I bite back the tears, refusing to ruin my makeup

What are you doing?
My common sense screams at me.

Pack your shit and get out while you still can.

Kent follows me into the kitchen. We both want the same thing.

I get the shot glasses over the sink and he gets the whiskey off the counter. We’re a team.

Our eyes lock as we swallow our shots, running from each other right before our eyes.

People trickle in slowly. I hang out in the kitchen, awkwardly pouring shots for Kent’s friends. I don’t relax until Sophie and Samantha get here. I hug them so hard because for the first time I’m glad I have friends other than Becca.

“Come on, girls.” I take their hands and lead them into the kitchen, passing Kent and Zeke on the way in. I ignore them and pour Sophie and Sam a shot each.

Sam glances at Kent as she wipes her mouth off.

He winks at her.

I look away.

I have to.

Sam’s my friend.

“Hmm,” Sophie murmurs. She leans over and whispers in my ear. “Don’t worry. We’ll get him. He’ll be crying in your lap tonight.”

“Sophie, don’t.”

“Don’t what?” she coyly asks, grabbing my hand. “Let’s dance, girly. I love me some Pitbull.”

The open space in the living room is now a dance floor thanks to Sophie and me. At first I can’t relax. I can’t stop thinking about everything. About the eyes I know are on me. The hands that touched me. The man I can’t have.

Sophie grabs my hand and grabs my attention. “Forget about him for a few hours.”

“I invited Trevor.”

She grins salaciously. “Good girl. This is going to be so fun. The only man I want you worrying about tonight is Trevor. That’s it. Don’t even look at Kent.”

“Kent who?” I whisper.

I allow him to fade away. Because if I don’t my brain will explode. Sophie and I dance to so many songs I lose count. I’m sweaty and take the shot Sam offers me. As I swallow it down I spot a familiar face hanging out on the edge of the party. James looks so out of place it breaks my heart.

I grab Sophie’s hand. “Come meet my friend James. Be nice,” I warn, not kidding.

She nods vigorously. “Nice. Got it. Ohh, he’s cute.”

“Hi, James.” He nods at me. I have a feeling he’s not going to talk in front of anyone tonight. “James, this is Sophie. Sophie, this is James.”

She offers him her hand and he takes it, shaking it weakly. “It’s nice to meet you, James.” She gives him a flirty smile and laughs when he doesn’t buy it. “What’s wrong with him? He looks fine to me,” she whispers in my ear.

“Nothing’s wrong with him. He’s great. And deaf,” I whisper back, using her hair to block my lips.

“Oh.”

I grab his hand. “You owe me a dance.”

He looks at his feet.

“Please?” Leaning over, I catch his gaze, giving him my hopeful face.

Finally he nods, appearing dreadfully nervous. I ignore Kent. I ignore that man with all my might, and lead James over to where Sam and Sophie are dancing.

I wrap my arms around his neck and bring our faces close together so he can read my lips. “Follow my movements.”

James can’t hear the music, but he can feel my body. I take his hands and place them on my hips and then resume my hold around his shoulders. At first James is stiff as stone. I don’t let it bother me. I keep dancing, feeling the beat and letting it guide my hips. Soon he starts to move too. He matches my movements, and I realize too late he can feel it in his feet. He knows exactly what to do.

“Is this fun?” I ask, pulling back to meet his eyes.