Native Affairs (86 page)

“At your company? Uh-oh.”

“We’re keeping it a secret.”
 

“Good luck. He’s not married?”

“Newly divorced.”

“How newly?”

“The decree was final three weeks ago.”

“Oh, Amy, you’d better be careful.”

“Don’t you want to hear about the date?”

“Sure,” Ann said. She sat and propped her feet up on a hassock, noting the degree of swelling in her ankles.

Not too bad but it was still early in the day.

Ann folded her hands over her protruding belly and settled in to listen.

* * * *

Three days later, at 2:00 a.m., Ann struggled off her bed and waddled out into the living room, where Amy was sleeping on the foldout sofa.

“Amy, wake up!” Ann said, shaking her friend’s shoulder aggressively.

Amy sat up, her hair over one eye.

“Wassa madda?” she mumbled.

“My water broke,” Ann said.

“Wassitmean?”

“It means I have to get to the hospital right now. Will you call a cab while I get dressed?”

Amy stumbled to her feet and then into the kitchen, where she splashed cold water on her face and then returned, looking more alert but somewhat alarmed.

“Where’s the number?” she asked.

“On the pad by the phone.”

“I guess this is really happening,” she said as Ann returned to the bedroom.

I guess it really is, Ann thought, and went to the closet for her clothes.

 
* * * *

“He is just beautiful,” Amy said to Joan, beaming, peering into the isolette as she stood next to the Jensens. The baby responded by opening his mouth in a toothless yawn and beating the air with two tiny red fists.

“You know who he looks like,” Joan said.

“Like Heath with blue eyes,” Amy replied.

“They all have blue eyes at the beginning.”

“His will stay blue. He has Ann’s eyes.” Amy looked over at Joe. “I can’t believe you got here before Heath.”

“We were here for the weekend to see Joan’s sister.”

“Did you call him?” Joan asked Amy.

Amy nodded.

“What did he say?”

“He didn’t say anything. He was already gone. His secretary told me that he had planned to be here for the due date.”

“Then he should be walking through that door any minute,” Joe observed.

The elevator doors parted and Heath stepped into the hall, carrying a large armload of roses wrapped in a florist’s green waxed paper.

“You could make money with your psychic powers,” Amy said to Joe.

“Remember that we all promised to be pleasant,” Joan said archly.

Heath looked at the little group standing at the nursery window and hesitated, then took a deep breath. He was wearing light summer slacks and a pale yellow polo shirt that emphasized his dark good looks. He walked up beside Amy and stood looking at the little plastic carrier with “Bodine” written on the I.D. card. He didn’t say a word but Amy watched his eyes fill with tears. He bent his head as they ran silently down his face.

Amy felt her hostility toward him drain away, to be replaced by an almost reluctant compassion. She looked significantly at Joan, who took Joe’s arm and steered her husband away from the nursery and back toward the nurses’ station.

“I wanted to be here for the birth,” Heath finally said. His voice sounded congested, like he had a cold.

“You just missed it. She was a little early.”

“Is Ann all right?”

“She’s fine.”

“And the baby?”

“Perfect.”

Heath closed his eyes, his carved profile a study in regret. “I don’t deserve either of them.”

Amy found herself patting his arm. No wonder Ann couldn’t stay angry with him.

“I want to see Ann,” he said.

“She’s still sleeping.”

“Then I’ll wait.” He looked around him restlessly for the visitors’ lounge.

“The waiting room is just down the hall,” Amy said. “I’ll show you.”

He followed her to the sterile cubicle, which had a gray and white tiled floor and plastic gray and blue chairs. Heath sat in one of them and stared at the floor, still clutching the flowers.

“Should I take those?” Amy asked. “I’ll get someone to put them in water.”

He handed them to her.

“Was she in a lot of pain?” he asked.

“I don’t think so.”

“I’ve heard labor is very painful,” he said.

“Most women seem to survive it.”

He wasn’t listening.

“I think I’ll just go see the Jensens. We were about to leave for lunch when you arrived. Do you want to join us?”

Heath didn’t answer.

“Heath?”

He looted up, startled.

“Lunch?”

He shook his head. “I’ll stay here.”

Amy gave up and found the Jensens, who were lingering near the nurses’ station.

“Let’s go. He’s in another world. I don’t think he’ll be focusing on anything until he sees Ann.”

“Should I go talk to him?” Joe asked.

“I think it’s better to leave him alone, Joe. It’s obvious that he has a lot on his mind.”

Amy gave the flowers to the aide assigned to Ann’s room and the trio departed.

In the waiting room Heath sat alone, his eyes fixed on the checkered floor.

* * * *

When Amy returned to Ann’s room two hours later, minus the Jensens, Ann was reading the tags on several arrangements of flowers that had been delivered to her room.

“Who from?” Amy asked.

“The blue and white carnations are from Tim, and the glads are from my editor. The jade plant is from Daniela and Victor.”

“Where’s Heath?”

Ann stared at her. “Heath?”

“Yes, he was here just before I left and he said he would wait until you woke up to visit you.”

Ann looked away, her expression thoughtful.

“You didn’t see him?” Amy asked in astonishment, looking around as if Heath might be lurking somewhere in the room.

Ann shook her head.

“I can’t believe it. He had this huge bunch of roses and—” Amy stopped. “You mean, he just left?”

“Apparently so.”

“Why on earth would he do that?”

“Lost his nerve?” Ann suggested softly.

“Heath? Never.”

“You don’t know him the way I do.”

“That’s true,” Amy said archly.

“Did he see the baby?” Ann asked.

Amy nodded. “He was very touched, Annie.”

“Not touched enough to stick around,” Ann replied, shaking her head.

A nurse came into the room carrying a squalling bundle. “Somebody’s hungry, Mother,” she said.

Ann held out her arms and the nurse placed the baby in Ann’s embrace. His little face was wrinkled and his eyes screwed shut as his lips worked furiously.

“Will you feed the kid, already?” Amy said. “He sounds like a fire siren.”

“Healthy lungs,” the nurse said approvingly.

Ann unbuttoned the top of her nightgown and pushed her nipple into the baby’s mouth. He rooted frantically for a couple of seconds and then settled down to suck contentedly.

“You’re pretty good at that,” Amy said wonderingly, smiling.

“He does all the work,” Ann replied.

“Did Mrs. Bodine’s visitor leave?” Amy asked the nurse.

“Which one?”

“Her husband,” Amy said dryly.

“That young man was Mr. Bodine?” the nurse said, surprised. “He never told me. He left about an hour ago. That reminds me, I’ll go and get the flowers he brought.”

Amy waited until the nurse had gone back into the hall before she said, “I’ll never understand that man.”

“Maybe he just wanted to see the baby, not me,” Ann said dejectedly, looking down at her son.

“Oh, Annie, no. He really was concerned about you.” Seeking to change the subject, she said, “What are you going to name that little one?”

“I don’t know.”

“It says Baby Boy Bodine on his isolette, maybe you can stick with that.”

Ann smiled weakly at the feeble joke, then lifted the baby to her shoulder to burp him. After a few firm pats, he belched loudly.

“Healthy digestive system,” the nurse confirmed as she entered the room again with Heath’s flowers arranged in a vase and an ivy plant in her other hand.

“This place is starting to look like a greenhouse,” Amy said, making room for the ivy on Ann’s bedside stand. “Who’s Ben Rowell?” she added, reading the card.

“One of Heath’s employees.”

“I guess you’ll be getting a few more of those.”

“Probably. I’ll ask the staff to deliver them to a rest home or something.”

They both looked up as Heath suddenly appeared in the doorway, his arms laden with a football, a basketball, and a pair of roller skates. The expression on his face as he saw his son nursing at Ann’s breast was one she would never forget.

“I’ll be back tonight, Ann,” Amy said, heading for the door. She paused at Heath’s side and kissed his cheek.

“Congratulations, Daddy,” she said, and left.

“There’s a sporting goods store across the street. I thought I’d kill a little time until you woke up,” Heath said nervously by way of explanation.

“I think he’s a little young for those, Heath.”

“I know. I just wanted to do...something,” he said lamely. He put down his burdens and pulled a chair next to the bed, watching wordlessly as the baby fed, making satisfied sucking noises.

“He has a good appetite,” Heath said.

“Yes.”

The baby’s activity slowed as they looked on, fascinated. His jaws finally ceased motion altogether, his eyes closed and, in seconds, he was asleep.

“That fast?” Heath said.

“The nurse said they go out like lights at this stage.” Ann settled the baby next to her on the bed and tucked his receiving blanket up to his chin.

When she looked back at Heath, he had slumped visibly and had put his head in his hands.

“Heath?” she said softly.

He looked up, took her free hand, and held it to his lips.

“Isn’t your son beautiful?” Ann asked.

He nodded, swallowing painfully. Then, to Ann’s complete amazement, Heath leaned forward to put his head in her lap and began to sob.

“I didn’t want you to be alone through this,” he said thickly. “I wanted all of it to be different.”

“It’s all right,” Ann said, stroking his hair gently. “It’s all over now.”

“You don’t understand.” He lifted his head and she saw that his face was stained with tears.

Even when they were teenagers she had never seen him cry.

“I thought so many times of calling you, but...” He gestured, unable to continue.

“What?” Ann prompted him.

“Even from the beginning, I wasn’t sure you would want my baby, knowing what you knew about my family. I wasn’t sure you would want me, or us, as a package...” He shook his head and stopped again. This was very difficult for him to say.

“I want the package,” she said, “but—”

The nurse bustled into the room as Heath hastily turned his head away from her.

“Sleeping already?” she said, picking the baby up and feeling his bottom. “Still dry, too. Well, he’ll just have a nice nap and then come back to visit this evening. Your son is a handsome fellow, isn’t he, Mr. Bodine?”

“Yes,” Heath replied, clearing his throat.

“I’m glad to see you. We thought you were missing in action earlier.”

“Just a visit to the store,” Ann said quickly, gesturing to the pile of toys on the chair.

“New fathers can never wait for the athletic equipment,” the nurse said, chuckling as she left with the baby.

“What do I have to do to get some privacy here, rent out a whole ward?” Heath said disgustedly.

“It’s a hospital, Heath. They run in and out constantly. There’s nothing you can do.”

“Yes, there is.” He got up and closed the door. On the way back to her bed, he pulled his wallet from his pants pocket. He extracted two cards and handed them to her.

“I’ve joined a group called Adult Children of Alcoholics,” he said. “That’s the name and number of my partner. I’ve already attended two meetings.”

Ann was speechless.

“And I contacted a doctor—a family counselor— on Big Palm. I had a first session with her. We have to go back together as soon as you’re able. If you want to try again with me, that is.” He looked at her warily, as if afraid she might say no.

“Of course I want to try,” Ann said, touching his cheek, still in shock.

“I can’t promise anything. Just going to see those people in the first place was hard.”