Never Desire a Duke (One Scandalous Season) (3 page)

Oh, Claxton
, her inner femininity sighed in spite of
ever
ything.

Upon close inspection, Claxton had not a single perfect feature. Yet with all the imperfect pieces of him put together, what a
compelling
picture he made. He was handsome in that way, yes, but shared nothing in common with the affable, fashionable dandies portrayed in contemporary fashion plates. His attractiveness was all darkness and intensity combined with the power of uncommon height, broad shoulders, and the lean musculature of an athlete.

She stood taller and straightened her shoulders, attempting in whatever small way to match him. She hated how he always made her feel like a child.

“You’ve stained your glove,” he observed quietly, glancing down, then again into her eyes.

She did not breathe. Could not breathe with him standing so near and scrutinizing her with such interest. With his shoulder to the column, he held her gaze with the easy confidence of a roué who feared no rebuff, which only infuriated her because in contrast she had known nothing but his disregard.

“Of course my glove is stained,” she retorted. “It is your fault for startling me.”

Displeasure flickered across his countenance. “For the second time tonight, it seems.”

And yet in the next moment his lips slanted into a boyish half smile, one that sent her heart bounding about inside her chest like a happy hound greeting its master. Her heart had always responded in this manner at the sight of one of Claxton’s smiles. Only she wasn’t a sweet-tempered hound. She was a woman—and she hadn’t forgotten the bitter terms upon which they’d parted.

“The third time, actually,” she bit out. “The first being your unannounced arrival. You’ve been away seven months, Claxton. You ought to have sent word.”

He deftly lifted the glass from her hand and conveyed it to the nearby ledge. “It’s not my intention to be so startling.”

Before she knew what he was about, he’d pinched her fingertips and stolen her dampened glove from her hand. Cool air bathed her bare skin, sending a chill down her spine. While his free hand dispatched the glove into his coat pocket, the other held hers in place with a slight upward curl of his fingertips.

His lips pursed sensually. “As for your ruined glove, it would be my pleasure to escort you to your favorite shop and purchase another pair for you.”

She stared at him in bewilderment. He proposed togetherness? After months of bitterness and separation? She could only stand and stare and wonder what he was about. Her bare hand appeared small and vulnerable in his much larger one, an unsuspecting bird alighted on a wicked trap. Indeed, with a curl of his knuckles, he secured hers within his and lifted—

“Claxton—” she warned, discomfited by his sudden foray into intimacy.

“Immediately. Posthaste.” He pressed his lips to the tops of her fingers. His gaze unwaveringly held hers. “Perhaps tomorrow morning?”

The warm bliss that was his mouth moved to the
unde
rside of her wrist, where he pressed his nose to her skin and inhaled, eyes closed, as if she exuded some intoxicating perfume. A mad, delicious tingling spiraled up from her toes along the back of her thighs.

His gaze captured hers. “If only you will say the word and allow it.”

Say what word? Half-drunk on sensation, she didn’t even recall what they were talking about.

The next kiss, placed at the center of her palm, sent a languorous pleasure into her veins, awakening long-buried desires.

Involuntarily she swayed toward him, her body a traitor that for too long had
wanted
and
ached
and
yearned
for the husband and lover she’d believed him to be. Over his shoulder, Fox and Pitt watched, two stone-faced voyeurs. From the other side of the column came the sounds of music and laughter and conversation, while she and Claxton remained just out of sight, hidden in shadows. The clandestine nature of the moment only made Claxton’s kiss more thrilling.

More thrilling? What was she thinking?

Her husband had shown no care for her whatsoever since the loss of their child. He had betrayed the sanctity of their marriage and abandoned her. And now…now he sought to seduce her? Angry heat gathered in her cheeks.

She tore her hand away. “Everyone knew you’d returned to London but me.”

He considered her steadily, the smile fading from his lips. “Perhaps I feared that given advance warning, you would flee.”

“I don’t flee,” she retorted too loudly.

“Oh, but you do, Sophia.” His blue eyes flashed heat. “Twice tonight, within the space of a quarter hour, which makes us almost even as far as me
startling
and you
fleeing
are concerned.”

Just moments before, in the book room, she’d felt so much the lioness. For once, she’d gained the upper hand against a man who
always
held the upper hand, whether it were with his young wife or a political foe. And oh, la! Clearly Claxton believed all it required for him to erase his sins from her mind was a sensual look. An intimate touch.

“I’ve missed you.” He leaned closer, his gaze hot on her mouth, his intention apparent. Her husband was going to kiss her, and she had but a half second to decide whether to let him.

It took her less than that.

She planted her hand against his chest and pushed. “Do you truly believe I’m that unskilled a player of the game?”

“Game?” His nostrils flared.

She stepped back. “That I am just a sad little ingenue who, at your first warm glance, will welcome you back into my life and my bed?”

Claxton’s expression darkened. “No to the ingenue part, but…I am hopeful that I will be welcomed back into your life.” He crossed his arms over his chest and slowly leaned closer.
“And your bed.”

Her cheeks, already warm, now went to flames.

After a long moment, he prompted, “Sophia?”

“It’s just that”—her voice cracked with indignation—“I’m trying to determine
what
about our brief time spent together this evening has given you
any
cause to be hopeful on either front.”

“My darling.” He tilted his head and spoke in a low, patient tone, as if he need only talk her through an irrational female moment. “I’m the first to confess that when I departed England our marriage was not on the steadiest of footholds. Indeed, considering the circumstances, I assume full blame, but I had hoped that tonight we might—”

“You hoped wrong.”
Roar.
The lioness had returned. She would not fall so easily. “I require more from you than
this
.”

When she tried to quit him, he blocked her path, maneuvering her back into the shadows.

He did not touch her, but he might as well have for as close as he stood. “A moment ago, outside the book room, why the provoking comment about Lady Meltenbourne? I’m not married to her.” His gaze moved over her possessively. “I’m married to you.”

No doubt his words and manner were intended as reassurance, foreplay for a reconciliation. Yet the presence of Lady Meltenbourne’s name on his lips was like a bucket of cold water to her face, a reminder of an infuriating reality she simply couldn’t forget.

“That, my lord”—she reached for the punch glass—“is precisely the problem.”

He scowled, the frostiness she remembered so well returning to his blue eyes. “What are you saying?”

“Stolen kisses in shadows? Sweet words of seduction? After everything that has happened, after all this time—that is all you have to offer me?” She laughed sharply. “I’m your wife, Claxton, not some dreamy-eyed girl. Not anymore. You’re going to have to do much better than that.”

An hour later, Vane emerged from Lord Wolverton’s study, along with the select other gentlemen who had been invited by his lordship to stay for further conversation, cigars, and spirits. The party was over, the ballroom empty of guests. During the season, balls and soirees lasted until the morning hours, but the chime of a clock indicated the hour to be just nine.

Several gentlemen donned their hats and coats and pushed out into the night, where their drivers waited to convey them home.

“Good night, Fox,” Vane said to the man beside him, with all the cordiality he could summon.

He was sorely tempted, however, to plant his fist in Lord Havering’s face. For the entirety of the evening, Sophia’s childhood friend had submitted him to a ceaseless barrage of acidic barbs and black glares.

Without the slightest acknowledgment, Fox continued walking, unsmiling and with his gaze fixed forward. Under his breath he muttered, “It’s Lord Havering to you.”

Accepting his hat from the footman, he disappeared into the night.

Vane’s cheek twitched, but he held himself in check. He deserved the man’s disdain, but his jealous heart seethed over the idea that Havering should in any way play the part of his wife’s protector. Clearly, breaking the man’s face would only hinder his efforts to win Sophia back, so Vane instead turned to his wife’s grandfather.

He had always admired the earl, but perhaps because of the difficult relationship he shared with his own now-deceased father, he’d never been comfortable fully expressing that respect. Though Wolverton had remained cordial throughout the evening, Vane perceived a mistrust in the elder man’s eyes. Certainly, the state of his eldest granddaughter’s marriage was no secret and must be a grave disappointment.

A footman approached, as if to convey his lordship to bed.

“Wolverton, if I may have a word with you,” said Vane.

The earl lifted a staying hand, and the servant retreated.

He tilted his head. “What is it, Claxton?”

Vane cleared his throat, which suddenly felt as dry as sawdust, and forced himself to speak. “I’ve no desire to make excuses for myself, but I’ve misstepped where her Grace is concerned.”

“Indeed you have.”

“I intend to make things right with her.”

“I am an old man, Claxton, confined to my home by illness. If talk of your lack of commitment to your marriage has reached my ears, it is widely reported indeed.” The earl uttered the words with withering calm. “No matter how valiant your efforts are now, they may come too late.”

Age and Lord Wolverton’s confinement to a chair made him no less imposing. Vane felt like a small boy who’d received a thrashing. He felt not only shamed, but ashamed.

“I pray not,” Vane answered quietly. “Please know that I remain as committed as ever to the duchess, even more so today than when we first wed.”

He’d never spoken truer words. Time and distance had only proved that.

Wolverton steepled his fingertips and nodded, unsmiling. “Then I recommend you put your acclaimed diplomatic skills to work and begin your groveling posthaste. I suspect this will be the most difficult accord you’ve ever attempted to negotiate.” The earl stared into his eyes. “That is, if you’re allowed through the door.”

“Thank you, Wolverton.”

“Don’t thank me,” he countered sharply. “If she decides to seek a separation from you, I’ll support her every step of the way.”

The air left Vane’s lungs.
Separation.
Hearing the word spoken aloud, when his mind had only ever whispered it, created a new and unpleasant reality.

Wolverton continued. “Scandal be damned. I’m too old and too stubborn to care what anyone in this town thinks. My only wish at this late stage of my life is for my girls to find happiness before I die. After my death, my title will pass to my nephew. An unworthy profligate if there ever was one. The man has no decency; he is wholly consumed with vice. I have made what arrangements I can to see that the girls’ futures are secure, but life will no doubt be very different for them when I am gone.” His frown deepened. “Needless to say, Claxton, I had hoped for better from you.”

Claxton bowed his head. “I vow you will have it.”

“She’s upstairs. The third bedroom on the left.”

With a gesture, the earl summoned the footman. The two disappeared down the darkened hallway. Vane ascended the stairs, preparing himself for the confrontation to come.

His knock on Sophia’s door elicited no response. Turning the knob, he peered inside to find the room darkened and empty. Of course—she would seek comfort from her sisters. Never having explored the upper floor of this house, he found himself in unfamiliar territory, but he moved from one door to the next until he heard familiar feminine voices. Unfortunately, the softness with which they spoke, and the thickness of the door, prevented him from knowing whether they plotted his demise. He knocked.

“Come in.”

He would not of course. They likely assumed him to be their mother or a servant.

“It is Claxton,” he announced.

Frantic murmurings ensued, accompanied by several thumps, as if someone ran about the room.

A moment later, the door cracked open and he glimpsed a sliver of Daphne’s nose and mouth. Her eyes narrowed. “What do
you
want?”

M
iss Daphne.” He nodded. “I regret to disturb you so late in the evening, but I’m looking for her Grace. Is she with you?”

“My sister doesn’t want to talk to you, so go away.”

“It’s very important.”

“Important to you, perhaps,” called another voice, one he knew to be Clarissa’s. “I think the duchess is past the point of talking.”

He measured his response, remembering with whom he spoke. These were the two young girls who once stared at him with intense fascination and giggled delightedly at whatever he said. He and Sophia, after marrying, had taken her sisters on picnics and to Berkeley Square for pineapple ices. On quiet Sunday afternoons, they’d cajoled him into practicing the newest dance steps with them and interrogated him over what exactly men found arresting and pretty. His answer to them always: a happy smile. Never before had they spoken to him with such disrespect or dislike.

He endeavored to speak more gently. “I appreciate that you seek to protect your sister, but if that is the case, I ask that Sophia tell me herself.”

Peering over Daphne’s head, he spied Clarissa in a pink dressing gown, standing beside a large poster bed. Clarissa adored pink. Daphne, of course, deplored every shade of the same color.

Clarissa bent over a supine form covered in blankets, her face a portrait of sisterly concern. “Sophia. There, there, dear. Please stop crying.”

Crying? His heart stopped beating or at least felt as if it did. Belowstairs, when last he’d seen her, she had shown such strength, with no sign of softer emotion.

Clarissa continued. “Claxton is here. Do you wish to speak to him?” She bent low, placing her ear near the pillow. Rising up, she glared in his direction. “I’m afraid it’s exactly as I told you. She doesn’t want to speak to you. Can’t you see that she is overwrought? Please go away.”

“Overwrought?” he repeated, stunned. “Sophia?”

His lungs constricted. Though largely responsible for creating this wide chasm between them, standing here, ten feet away, he couldn’t abide that thought. “Move aside.”

Daphne shoved the door, seeking to shut him out, but with steady pressure he pushed her backward, easily forcing his way inside.

Striding toward the bed, he came face-to-face with a flying pillow. With a swipe of his hand, he fended it off. “She’s my wife.”

“You wouldn’t know it from your behavior. Stay away from her,” exclaimed Clarissa, her eyes ablaze. “Lothario!”

Daphne clutched at his coattails and skidded along behind him. “Philanderer!”

He now knew how Gulliver must have felt when attacked by the Lilliputians.

“Sophia.” Arriving at the bed, he brushed past Clarissa to touch Sophia’s shoulder—only to have that shoulder collapse beneath his hand. As Clarissa scrambled away, he yanked back the coverlet and found only pillows beneath.

“Where is she?” he gritted out and spun toward them.

Clarissa sneered. “We’re not going to tell you anything.”

“Brute!” Daphne threw a brush at him. It bounced off the center of his chest and fell to the carpet. Damn it.

“Have you both lost your minds?” he demanded.

“Perhaps so.” Clarissa crossed her arms at her waist. “People often lose their minds when they care deeply about someone. Can you imagine how it feels, Claxton, when a woman takes great pride in her husband and her marriage, only to be confronted with persistent rumor and innuendo?”

“Of course he doesn’t,” said Daphne. “If he did, he would never submit Sophia to such humiliation. I can only pray my future husband does not commit me to the same shame and misery.”

Their words troubled him more than he wished to admit. But he wasn’t going to beg for their forgiveness.

He returned to the door. “I understand you are both angry with me, as you have every right to be. But I will
not
defend myself to you, not until I make things right with your sister, my wife. My confessions are for her ears only—and my forgiveness hers alone to give.”

They stared at him in silence.

“Please. I beg you. I must see her. I must speak to her.”

Something in his words must have broken through their feminine defenses because the sisters visibly softened and tears glimmered in their eyes.

“You’re truly going to make things right with Sophia?” Clarissa asked, her green eyes pleading.

“I can only do that if you tell me where she is.”

“Really, Claxton,” Daphne chided softly. “What took you so long?”

“Please tell me.”

“Where she thought you’d never look. She’s gone to Camellia House.”

Camellia House. The setting of Vane’s best—and worst—childhood memories. He and Haden had lived there with their mother on the edge of London, while their father, the duke, resided a world away in a place called Mayfair.

Indeed, Vane had no memories of his father before the age of ten, when, upon the death of his mother, a tall, stern-faced man had appeared without any prior announcement and taken him and Haden away. The only reason Vane had even realized the bastard was their father was because he recognized the Claxton coat of arms on the magnificent carriage parked outside the gates of the cemetery, though the man inside the conveyance hadn’t, for the entirety of the funeral, deigned to step outside.

Claxton. Vane had learned to hate the name. The very name he now bore as his own.

Snow flurries swirled outside his window, illuminated by the lamps of his carriage. In warmer months, the night streets of London would still be thick with carriages, hansoms, wagons, and pedestrians crowding the pavement. But tonight, winter ruled. Even the vendors had abandoned the streets. Anyone with a place to call home was there now, near a fire or stove until morning. Sophia had left a place of warmth and comfort, one inhabited by those she loved best. It was just more proof of her desperate need to escape him.

He had never mentioned Camellia House to Sophia. How she knew of the small estate and why she’d chosen to escape from him there, he did not know. The prospect of setting foot inside his childhood home brought a thousand memories crashing down around him, and so close to Christmas, which had always been such a special time for them there.

As each moment passed, his pulse quickened, and something akin to anxiety coiled in his stomach far greater than he had experienced on any line of battle. His nerves were already wound tight anticipating all he must say to her, all he must confess.

Philanderer. Lothario.
At least there were no questions as to the allegations against him. They came as no real surprise. Only now, given the advantage of retrospect, could he look back on the darkest days of their marriage and comprehend the magnitude of rage and soul-deep hurt that had consumed him. Having lost Sophia and his child, he had for a time fallen into old vices—g
ambling
hells, excessive drink, and yes, the company of old amours. For weeks he had danced along a dangerous edge, from which, in the end, he had stepped back. Yet…though he had not betrayed his marriage vows, he’d not particularly respected them either, allowing himself to be observed in questionable circumstances.

Perhaps, then, it was fitting that their reunion take place at Camellia House, for only by acknowledging the mistakes of his past could he hope to renew his future with her.

Vane shared more than an hour with those thoughts before his carriage concluded its passage over the Thames to trundle off the Mowbray ferry and pass through the sleeping village of Lacenfleet. At last the vehicle turned the final corner before making its way up the lawn toward the dark shadow at the top of the hill. With gloved hand, he denied his footman his duty and turned the handle, stepping down onto pavement already concealed by snow. A sudden gust caught his coat, piercing him through with frigid cold.

His footman rushed to meet him. “Your instructions, your Grace?”

“Wait for me.” The rising clamor of the wind forced him to shout just to be heard. “I shan’t be more than a half hour.”

Though the house appeared dark, another carriage occupied the drive, its driver hunched under the burden of a thick coat and blanket. Sophia must have only just arrived. Having been shut up for some fifteen years, the residence was not regularly staffed by servants. She and her maid were likely inspecting the premises before releasing their carriage to the village livery.

Here, there were no guests to be shocked, no family to overhear. Sophia had nowhere to escape. She would have no choice but to hear him out. Then she would either return home with him or he would depart alone. He had stopped at their London residence only long enough to change out of his evening clothes and to obtain a key, yet he stood on the steps, prepared, as a courtesy, to knock. However, with a push of the ornate brass handle, the door opened. He did not wish to startle her with his unexpected arrival, but on second thought, neither did he wish for her to bolt the doors against him. He proceeded inside.

A small oil lamp glowed on a side table. After removing his gloves and tucking them into his coat pocket, he lifted the lamp so that he might better see through the darkness. The fragrance of wood polish scented the air, whereas he’d expected mustiness and decay. Mr. and Mrs. Kettle, the married couple who’d tended the house and grounds for his mother, had remained in his employ despite their advancing years but resided in the village. He’d never expected them to actually work for their pay.

From where Vane stood, he perceived the glow of firelight in the great room. Realizing now was the time to announce his presence, he’d barely parted his lips to shout
hello
when he heard the sound of voices.

A woman’s and a man’s.

Every muscle in his body tensed. He approached, careful to remain out of sight from those inside.

“You’re so beautiful,” the man murmured. “A goddess.”

“We shouldn’t do this,” she whispered.

Vane’s blood turned to ice. In that moment he realized Sophia wouldn’t be leaving Camellia House with him tonight. Not only had she come here to escape him, but she’d come with a lover.
Havering?

“Please,” she implored softly.

“Please yes, or please no?” the man whispered.

Clothing or blankets or whatever rustled loudly, evidence of sensual play. A moan, and then wet, smacking kisses.

A feminine gasp. “I don’t know. I can’t think.”

“Don’t let him come between us. Not now, not here.”

Vane clenched the frame of the door, tamping down the rage, the lightning-hot instinct toward violence that clawed up from inside his chest. He had to see for himself. He would forever preserve this picture of her in another man’s arms. Then and only then could he stamp out the fledgling hope he’d so foolishly allowed residence in his heart.

A long settee prevented Vane from seeing the lovers. He silently approached, the lamp shielded behind his hand. There, on the other side, the floor was a jumble of cushions. A smallish fire burned, a dot on the massive hearth, but a japanned screen dimmed its ambient glow. Still, he made out two figures struggling, with the man sprawled on top.

She gasped. “Please stop.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“No, really, I can go no further.”

“Come now, darling—”

Hearing this, Vane’s composure shattered.

“
Get off her
,” he roared, lifting the lantern high.

Sophia screamed. Legs and arms flailed, tangled in shirtsleeves and petticoats.

“Bloody hell,” her lover shouted.

Two faces peered up at him.
Not Sophia!

Instead, the face belonged to—

Lady Meltenbourne.

She gaped, openmouthed and wide-eyed next to his brother, her hair wildly disarrayed. Vane’s first reaction was relief. Then fury.

“Haden,” he thundered.

Haden stood, thrusting his shirttail into his breeches. “Good God, Claxton.” He wobbled drunkenly. “Give me an apoplexy, why don’t you? What in the hell are you doing here?”

“Stopping you from making a big mistake. The lady is married.”

His brother rubbed a hand over his face. “So is half of the
ton
,” he slurred, “who is having an affair with the other half of the
ton
…who…aren’t their spouses.” He blinked several times. “Zounds, that didn’t exactly make sense, but…you…understand what I’m attempting to say.”

His brother, Haden, had always been reckless. Having spent most of his childhood in school, growing up in the company of other boys, he still lived each day in a spirit of ceaseless revelry, leaving a trail of broken hearts, gambling debts, and halfhearted business endeavors in his wake. Having spent so many years apart, they’d been little more than strangers until seven months ago when Haden, at Vane’s summons, joined him on the Continent to serve as his support attaché, assisting with matters of diplomatic minutiae Vane had no time to deal with. They’d again grown close, but God spare him, his feckless brother always knew how to put his boot right into the middle of a scandal. Vane did not know if Haden would ever settle down into a respectable sort of life.

Vane set the lantern on a small table. “If her ladyship’s married status is not enough, then please understand she is also one of the most indiscreet women in all of England.” No one knew that more than he.

“That’s not true,” Lady Meltenbourne blurted. Then she giggled. “Oh, pphssht. Perhaps it is.” Throwing her arms high over her head, she collapsed back into the cushions. A bottle beside her tipped over, thunking hollowly and rolling across the floor. The lady was foxed.

When he first became duke, the
ton
matchmakers had done their best to pair him with Annabelle. Though beautiful, he found her to be vacant and insipid—the opposite of everything Sophia proved to be. Later, when his betrothal to Sophia was announced, Annabelle reacted as a woman betrayed. Though he could not ever recall having specifically encouraged her affections, she remained quite determined about attaching herself to him, heedless of how her behavior might cause disgrace to herself or her husband.

Haden collapsed onto the settee and ran his fingers through his dark hair. “Well, if it makes you feel better, we hadn’t got past kissing and a bit of…er…Well, there’s really no need to go into those sorts of details, is there? I didn’t even know the woman before tonight, when I found her crying over some other bastard who’d broken her heart.”