Never Land (2 page)

            I couldn't give him hope. Not now. Not with Danny on his way to Heathrow as we spoke.

            “No, I'm sorry...” Kyle looked down. “I've been a jerk, Neve, I know that. I knew that when I signed up for the band again. That you're with Danny now. I get that. I respect it. But that doesn't mean it's not still hard. I can't just turn off my feelings like a tap.” He smiled wanly, trying hard to look nonchalant. “But for your sake. For the sake of the band. I have to try.”

            “I know, Kyle.” I tried to give him a “buddy” pat on the shoulder. “We'll keep things professional from now on.”

            “As if that would help,” he muttered under his breath. “I just need time, Neve. That's all. Time to get used to this.”

            I nodded. “I understand.”

            Steve interrupted our reverie, turning up with a girl on each arm.
Typical Steve,
I thought. Clearly he wasn't hung up on emotional drama. “These two want to come back to our suite,” he smiled. “But I can't give them both the attention they deserve.” He looked the girls up and down. “How about I bring along my friend Kyle here!”

            Their enthusiastic moans made it clear what they thought of this proposal.

            “So, Kyle can join us? Will you, Kyle?”

            Kyle looked at me for a second, holding my gaze. I could feel his anguish, and even now it had the power to move me.

            “Yeah, sure,” Kyle said, moving away and following Steve.

            No sooner had he gone than my phone rang. My heart leaped at the name on my caller ID: DANNY BLUE.

            “Hello, love.” His voice still had the power to galvanize me. “I've graded all the term papers – all twenty-five of them. And you know what that means?”

            My body began to tingle.

            “I've got nothing to do for the next leg of the flight except think about you. I'm sitting in Dublin airport right now, waiting for my connecting flight. If all goes well, I'll have you in my arms in a few short hours.”

            “Dublin, already?”

            “Good winds,” said Danny. “We got in early. Now I suggest you take a nap, love. Because you're not getting any sleep tonight.”

            His voice made me tremble with desire.

            “Goodbye, love,” he said.

            “Goodbye – love you.”

            “See you soon.”

            My heart sank. He still hadn't said it back – those three little words I couldn't
stop
saying. I knew the history of his heart. Knew about the girl he had loved, whom he had accidentally killed – the girl I could never be.
Peyton.

           
Had he said
I love you
to her?

            I sighed and tried to ignore the prickling feelings of doubt. Danny and I were together, were happy. Why did I have to ruin it with my neuroses?

            “So, Neve.” A harsh, cold voice made me turn around. “I hear you got loads of action when I was away? I thought you were saving yourself, huh? But I guess you're just a dumb slut like all the rest.”

            My heart sank.

            It was Geoff.

Chapter 1

            Geoff's eyes were wild and bloodshot as he turned to me. He'd been drinking, I could tell. But more than that – the look in his eyes clearly spoke of much harder substances. His words were slurred and his expression had a lascivious glint in them that spelled clear danger. My stomach dropped. Clearly his time away from the band – first in physical therapy, then, I'd heard, in a spot of parent-mandated rehab – hadn't done much for him. He was still the same messy addict who'd come onto me in a Los Angeles nightclub. His words stung, but I tried to ignore them.
For the good of the band
, I told myself. We only had to stick with Geoff for a few more performances. Then we could find a more reliable guitarist...

            Geoff pushed against me, causing me to trip back against the wall. In that moment I became suddenly, terribly conscious of the fact that he and I were alone. His trembling hands found their way to my thighs, gripping the flesh so hard I yelped.

            “Careful, Neve...” Geoff said. “The paps are out there. Don't want to make a scandal for the band, do you?” he groaned. “You look so fucking good, you know. In that little skin-tight leather dress. You know you're asking for it, don't you, in that thing? Because no man can resist doing things to you – you must know that, don't you, baby?”

            The smell of whiskey on his mouth frightened me. But more so the look in his eyes. Frenetic – crazed. I knew something was wrong with him. Terribly, terribly wrong. This wasn't just a normal bender. This was something worse – far worse. Whatever Geoff had taken tonight, it had made him uncontrollable, savage.

            I had to keep calm. “Geoff,” I said, as serenely as I could. “You're a bit drunk. You've taken some pills. What you really want is to back down, okay? To sit down. You don't want to provoke me...” I couldn't resist getting mad as I gave his hands a hard shove when he his hands touched mine. “I
will
let you have it, Geoff. If you don't leave me alone.”

            “Let me have it, huh?” Geoff drawled, his mouth contorting into a cruel grin. “That sounds so good, doesn't it? Coming out of your sexy,
sexy
mouth. I want you to let me have it all night long, you know what I'm saying? I've fantasized about you so many times in the past few months. You're the number one star. I used to have to just dream about what you looked like naked. But then, now I have visual proof...”

            “What are you talking about, Geoff?” I inched towards the door, looking for a clean exit.

            “You know your dumb dopehead roomie in the dorms? All it took was a few bags of the finest weed in LA and she let me set up a camera in your rooms. I got a good long look at you.” He licked his lips.

            My mouth fell open. “You made a sex tape of me?”

            “Like you wouldn't do the same,” he scoffed. “You and the rest of the band tried to fuck me over. To get rid of me to make way for the sainted Danny Blue. I just wanted protection – just to make sure that you'd never turn your backs on me again...” He laughed.

            “You're bluffing.”

            But Geoff didn't look like he was in much of a state to bluff. “I watched it every night while
healing
from my wounds. Maybe you'd call it obsession. I just call it justice. And I bet you wouldn't want
that
posted on TMZ for Daddy to see.”

            My jaw dropped. This was insane – even coming from Geoff.

            “No, Geoff – you can't...”

            “Sure I can.” He pulled out his cell phone. “It's on here – not
just
on here, of course. I made copies. But one click of the button and it's leaked to every single gossip site out there.”      

            “Geoff, you can't be serious.”

            “Probably good for the band. You'd sell more records. Of course, you'd also get sick weirdos like me jacking off to you naked – but that's not my problem, is it?” he laughed.    

            “Geoff, please....”

            “Begging, are we?” He looked amused. “You don't have to beg. You can have this tape back anytime you want. You know what you have to do...”

            “What?” My heart was beating faster than a hummingbird's wings.

“Give me the reality. Better than the fantasy, I'll bet.”

            “Geoff, no...”

            “What? You have other plans? How do you think Danny would react to seeing a tape of you on every laptop in the country?”

            “You're a scumbag,” I spat, my fear tempered by rage. “I knew we shouldn't have asked you back. Danny...”

            “Danny, huh?” he growled. “Always Danny, isn't it, with you? Danny this, Danny that. Danny took my rightful place as head of the band. Took my place in your bed. You rejecting me over and over again just made me want you more. Then when I found out you held out for him, the guy who took my place as lead guitarist, it was the biggest blow. You thought you could screw me over for your precious Danny. But guess what, beautiful? I'm here – he's not. And you're mine now, not his...”

            And then he lunged forward – a single, terrifying gesture. Before I could even scream, his hand was over my mouth. His enormous, hulking frame overpowering mine in a single instant. “Don't scream, Neve. Don't want to attract the wrong kind of attention.”

            “Geoff, stop it
right now
...”

            But I was too late. He was too far gone. As effortlessly as if I were as light as a feather, he yanked my wrists and pulled me with him out the back door into the alleyway.

            “Geoff, let me go!”

            “You're coming with me, gorgeous...” His grin smelled of vomit.

            I calculated my risks. Better scream than God knows what else. But he clapped a hand over my mouth and put a coat over my head. His body overpowered my own. I tried to struggle, to kick, to punch, to bite, but there was nothing I could do.

            I could feel him dragging me forward, hear the tires of a car screeching to a halt.

            “Grosvenor Hotel,” he said. “And step on it.”

            And off we went, whirling into the night.

Chapter 2

            We sped through the streets of London. I was paralyzed by shock, fear – panic. Even at his lowest, at his sleaziest, Geoff had always been a friend to me, someone that I could, if not trust, nevertheless assume was never a threat to me. But that was the old Geoff. The Geoff I had known before the drugs, before the alcohol, before the hard living that had fried his brain. The Geoff that sat next to me in the cab, leering with a lascivious grin, pinching my inner thigh so hard that my skin turned black and blue, was a stranger to me. Drugs, alcohol, fast-living had turned him into someone else. My heart was pounding fast. Already we had left behind the O2 arena – already we were in a part of London I didn't recognize. I wanted to get out, to scream, to run, but something held me back. The tape that Geoff was talking about – was he bluffing? Did he really have a sex tape of me installed in my dorm room? My heart plummeted as I imagined that tape going viral, spread on every single video streaming platform between here and Tasmania. Imagined my father seeing it, my mother – imagined Danny watching it, his eyes full of pain and rage, silently judging me...

            “You're one sick bastard, Geoff,” I muttered.

            “Maybe,” Geoff looked sickly smug. “But I intend to get something out of this. You can't replace me without paying the price. I thought you were all my friends – but I was wrong. You're just out for yourselves, every last one of you. And I'm out for myself, too. Besides, I now know you weren’t saving yourself. You’re a slut like the others, like those girls who lined up after our performances just to have one night with a rock star, easy and ready to give it up to every last...”

            I couldn't control my blinding anger. I'd wanted to stay cool, collected, in control. But in the moment I couldn't resist the urge to smack him – hard. My palm collided with the flat of his cheek, and the sharp stinging sound we made filled me with perverse pleasure.

            “Everything all right back there, miss?” The cabbie turned around, worried.

            “Everything's fine,” Geoff said quickly. “She just likes playing a little rough, don't you, Never?” He grabbed my wrists tightly and whispered into my ear. “Unless you want that video uploaded to YouTube in ten seconds flat, I suggest you stay put.”

            I considered quickly. If I screamed and made a fuss now, the cabbie would likely get Geoff off me – but not before Geoff hit “send” on his cell phone and uploaded that video to the Internet. If we were heading back to Geoff's hotel – I'd be risking assault or worse. But I'd also be that much closer to his laptop – and to a team of security staff. 

            I had to think fast. “I'll be quiet,” I said. “I'll do whatever you want, okay? Only one condition...”

            “What?” Geoff's mouth widened as his perceived victory spread slowly, dully, across his face.

            “I don't want to stay in the Grosvenor. It's stuffy and old-fashion. If we're going to do it, I want to do it somewhere...sexy.” My own words repulsed me.

            “Where do you want to go then, huh?” He took out his wallet, displaying a platinum credit card. “Anywhere you want, babe.”

            “The Mayfair Grand,” I said quickly.
The Mayfair Grand Blue.
One of Danny's father’s hotels. Somewhere Danny would have access – somewhere he could get to us in time.

            “The Mayfair Grand?” Geoff squeezed my thigh. “Girl has expensive tastes.”

            I wanted to throw up, but I kept my face calm.

            “I'm cold,” I said. “Give me your coat – I want to use it as a blanket.”

            “Trying to get my clothes off, huh? It's a shame to cover up those gorgeous legs of yours...” He moved his fingers further up my thigh, but relented and handed me his coat.

           
Perfect.

           
I moved my cell phone under the coat, hidden from view, and started typing, hoping I'd be able to use the touch pad without seeing. Texting Danny, Steve, everyone in my contacts list.
Emergency. MgrandBlue. Help me.

           
Luckily, Geoff was too drunk to notice me sliding my cell phone back into my tiny purse. When we reached our destination, he threw a hundred-pound note at the cabbie and dragged me into the lobby. The moments passed by in a blur as he threw down his credit card at reception and dragged me into an elevator, up towards the penthouse suite...

            “Sit on the bed,” he grunted.

            I followed orders, watching him warily. Now I just had to bide my time – hoping Danny had made it to Heathrow by now, that he had gotten my message. Geoff grinned at me. Instinctively, against myself, I felt a pang. Geoff had once been one of my dearest friends. I'd loved him once, the way I had loved Luc and Kyle and Steve. Never imagining that beneath that handsome exterior there lay demons. He'd been more gorgeous once, but his looks were ravaged by the effects of his hard living. Dark circles under his eyes. And that look of cruelty in his eyes that made me wonder if there was anything human in him any longer. Anything at all.