Night Road (7 page)

At the first store, Mia wandered among the racks, looking a little confused and overwhelmed, and then suddenly she pulled out a dress. “Look at this one,” she said, holding up a floor-length salmon-pink dress with lacy sleeves and a tiered skirt. “What do you think?” she asked Lexi.

Lexi smiled, but it was a little distracted. “It’s great. Try it on.”

“Only if you’ll try one on, too. Please? I can’t do it alone. You know I can’t.”

Lexi sighed. She went to the rounder, found an aquamarine-blue gown with a beaded, strapless bodice, and followed Mia into the dressing rooms.

When they came out, Jude was stunned by how beautiful they both looked. “Those are perfect,” she said.

Mia studied her own reflection as she spun around. “These are definitely our dresses for homecoming, don’t you think, Lexster?”

“I’m not going to the dance,” Lexi said. “I don’t have a date.”

Mia stopped twirling. “Then I’m not going either.”

Lexi muttered something under her breath and walked back into the dressing room. When she came back out, she was dressed in her jeans and T-shirt. “No more dresses for me,” she said. “I can’t afford one anyway.”

“Come on, Lexi,” Mia pleaded. “You’re my best friend. If you don’t go to the dance, I won’t go.”

“She could go with Zach,” Jude said.

Mia shrieked. “That’s a
great
idea, Mom. We can totally double-date.”

Lexi gasped. “I am
not
going to force your brother to take me to a stupid dance.” On that, she walked away from them.

Tears immediately brightened Mia’s eyes. “Did I hurt her feelings, Mom? I didn’t mean to.”

Jude watched Lexi leave the store. “You didn’t do anything wrong,” she said softly. “We all just … forget sometimes that Lexi doesn’t have the same opportunities that you do. We should have been a little more sensitive. Come on.” They walked over to the register, where Jude paid for both dresses. She had the clerk box up Lexi’s. “Go get dressed, Poppet. I’ll take care of Lexi.”

Jude walked out of the small boutique and into the busy mall, carrying a shopping bag. Everywhere she looked, she saw packs of girls, no doubt armed with their parents’ credit cards. No wonder Lexi was out of sorts. It had to be difficult to be different from all the kids you knew, from your best friend, who just expected to get what she wanted.

Jude saw Lexi sitting on the bench outside the bookstore. She was slumped forward, with her long black hair falling across her downcast face.

Jude went to her, sat down. Lexi scooted sideways to make room for her.

“Sorry for the rant,” Lexi mumbled.

“I should have been more sensitive. I know those dresses are expensive.”

“It’s not that.”

Jude tucked the hair back behind Lexi’s ear so she could see the girl’s face. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

“It’s cool. I shouldn’t have made such a big deal out of it.”

Jude sat back. Her heart ached for Lexi; she knew how hard life had been for the girl, how hard it still was sometimes. While most of the island kids—like her own—were looking all over the country for the perfect college, Lexi was planning on going to the local junior college after graduation. She worked too many hours at the ice cream shop, saving every cent she earned. Her pie-in-the-sky dream was a full scholarship to the UW, but those were few and far between. It pained Jude to think that Lexi would miss the rite-of-passage senior year homecoming dance. “I hear Zach has a good chance of being homecoming king.”

“He will be.”

“And Kaye Hurtt is a shoo-in for queen.”

“It could be Maria de la Pena.”

“But Zach won’t be there because Amanda’s going to be out of town.”

Lexi tilted her face to Jude. If Jude hadn’t known better, she would have said Lexi looked scared. “I didn’t know that.”

“I don’t want either one of you to miss the dance. Zach would never take a real date, not while he’s with Amanda, but you’re his sister’s best friend. Amanda wouldn’t mind. And then all three of you could have fun at the dance. You’ll always remember it.”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” Lexi said quietly. “What about what happened with Haley?”

“Oh, honey. You would never do something like that to Mia. This is a whole different thing.” Jude smiled. She knew how sensitive Lexi was to overstepping her welcome, but this would be good for everyone. “How about if we let Zach decide?”

Lexi stared at her for a long time, saying nothing.

“It’s not a sympathy date, Lexi. It’s a night out for friends. And I really think Zach should be there when he’s named homecoming king, don’t you?”

Lexi sighed. “Yeah.”

Jude held out the shopping bag. “I bought the dress for you.”

“I can’t accept that,” Lexi said. “It’s too much.”

Jude saw Lexi’s gratitude, but there was something else in the girl’s blue eyes, a dark, smoky shame that broke Jude’s heart. “You’re part of the family, Lexi. You know that. Let me do this for you, okay? I know you want to go to the dance. Let Zach take you.”

Lexi looked down at the tile floor. The hair behind her ear fell free again, shielded her profile from Jude. “Okay, Jude,” she finally said, softly. “If Zach wants to take me, I’ll go with him. But…”

“But what?”

Lexi shook her head; her hair shimmered at the movement. “Don’t be surprised if he says no.”

Five

“Okay. Open your eyes,” Jude said, putting her hands on Lexi’s shoulders.

Lexi drew in a deep breath and did as she was told. In front of her was a big mirror surrounded by tiny globe lights. For a split second, she saw a stranger—a girl with sleek, glossy black hair, layered now around her face, and perfectly arched eyebrows. Carefully applied violet eyeliner had enhanced her blue eyes, given her a smoky, sophisticated look, and blush highlighted her high cheekbones. She was almost afraid to smile, in case it was an illusion.

Jude leaned closer. “You’re beautiful.”

Lexi slipped out of the chair and turned around. “Thank you,” she said, hugging Jude tightly.

Later, on the ferry home, she and Mia sat in the backseat of the Escalade, with Jude in the driver’s seat. Lexi kept sneaking looks at herself in the mirror. She wanted to believe it would make a difference somehow, this transformation, that Zach would finally look at her and think she was pretty. But she knew better.

Tonight was not going to go well. Honestly, she couldn’t fathom why he’d agreed to take her to the dance—probably because Jude and Mia had pressured him mercilessly, and one thing was always true: Zach hated to disappoint his sister.

If only Lexi hadn’t almost kissed him. None of this would be a problem if she’d never turned to him that night. Or if she’d told Mia the truth. If only … if only. It was a list that went on and on, and she’d reread it so many times in her mind that she felt sick to her stomach.

It had been a week since the party—since the hilltop. Lexi had repeatedly intended to tell Mia the truth, but she hadn’t. She couldn’t, and now, for the first time, when she saw her best friend, Lexi felt like a liar. And every time she saw Zach, she ran like a track star. She was terrified that she’d ruined everything, that when her secret came out, she’d lose Mia’s friendship and Jude’s respect. Everything that mattered to her.

“I should have said no,” Lexi muttered later, as she and Mia bounded up the stairs at the Farraday house to get dressed. “This has disaster written all over it.”

“I don’t get you,” Mia said, closing the door behind them. “I really don’t.”

Lexi immediately felt guilty. “Sorry. It’ll be fun. I can’t wait.” She went to Mia’s overflowing closet, where both dresses hung between sheets of plastic. They dressed and studied themselves in the oval mirror by the desk. Only occasionally could Mia’s black-and-white Converse high-tops be seen under her hemline.

“I think I look okay,” Mia said, turning to Lexi. Her green eyes held worry. “Don’t I? Will he think so?”

“You look gorgeous. Tyler will—”

A knock at the door interrupted them. There was a pause, then it opened. Jude stood there, holding a silver camera. “Tyler is here.”

Mia looked nervously at Lexi. “How do I look?”

“Totally hot. He’s lucky to have you.”

Mia threw her arms around Lexi and hugged her tightly. “Thank God you’re with me. I don’t know if I’d have the guts to go downstairs without you.”

Holding hands, they left the bedroom and walked down the big curving staircase.

Zach and Tyler were in the living room, standing together, talking. Both were wearing blue suits. Zach’s hair was still wet—the football game had just ended and he’d raced home to get ready.

He looked up and saw Lexi. She saw the way he frowned as she came down the stairs. Her heart started beating so fast she felt light-headed.

Be cool,
she thought.

She’d say she was sorry right away, laugh it off, that stupid near-kiss. Maybe she’d say she’d been drunk and didn’t remember any of it. Could she pull that off?

As she neared him, Zach stepped forward, offering her a blue-tipped white carnation in a clear plastic box. “Thanks,” she mumbled.

“It’s got, like, a rubber band on it; it goes on your wrist,” he said. “Amanda says they’re the best kind.”

“Thanks,” she said again, not daring to look at him. He’d mentioned his girlfriend; she got the point.

“Okay, picture time,” Jude said. Miles came up beside her. “We’ll need fingerprints from you, Tyler,” he said.

“
Dad
!” Mia shrieked, blushing.

Lexi moved awkwardly into place beside Zach. He put an arm around her, but didn’t pull her close. They stood like images from an Old West photograph, stiff and unsmiling.

Flash. Click.

The photographs went on and on, until finally Zach said, “No more, dos amigos. We’re outta here.”

As they started for the door, Lexi pulled away from Zach. She stepped into the entryway, where she’d left a brown shopping bag by the table. Reaching inside, she pulled up a small green plastic container that held a potted purple petunia.

“This is for you,” Lexi said to Jude, feeling her face grow hot. It was such a little gift—she’d found it on the half-price counter at the local nursery. It was probably totally the wrong thing, but it was all Lexi could afford. “I know you don’t really need anything, but I looked … and you don’t have any petunias, so I thought … anyway, thanks for the dress.”

Jude smiled. “Thank you, Lexi.”

“Come on, Lexster,” Mia said from the doorway.

Lexi walked to the door with Jude, and then followed Mia out to the Mustang.

“One o’clock curfew,” Jude yelled from the doorway.

Zach didn’t seem to be listening. He walked on ahead to the Mustang, which was parked out front. He opened Lexi’s door but didn’t wait for her to get in. Instead, he walked around to the driver’s side.

When Mia and Tyler were settled in the backseat, Lexi took her place beside Zach. He started up the car and cranked on the music.

All the way to the high school, Mia and Tyler whispered together. Zach kept his eyes on the road. He seemed pissed off at Lexi, or at the fact that she was his date. She could hardly blame him. In the school lot, he parked close to the stairs, and the four of them merged into the colorful river of kids streaming into the gymnasium, which had been transformed into a tacky version of New Orleans, complete with streamers and fake moss. The Mardi Gras theme continued when they walked into the gym, where a chaperone handed them a handful of brightly colored bead necklaces.

The song playing was “Hella Good,” and the dance floor was overflowing.

They got their pictures taken first—each couple alone, then the girls, then Mia and Zach.

Lexi could see how stiff Zach was. Every girl in the senior class seemed to be watching them. No doubt Amanda had asked for a full report, and Zach wasn’t going to do anything to hurt his girlfriend’s feelings. He wouldn’t even look at Lexi.

Finally, he took her hand and led her out onto the dance floor. As they got there, the music changed, slowed down. He took her in his arms.

Lexi stared at his chest, tried to move with him and not step on his feet. Honestly, she had no idea how to dance, and she was so nervous, she couldn’t breathe. Finally, she looked up and found him staring down at her, his eyes unreadable. “I know you didn’t want to take me to the dance, Zach. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t know anything.”

“I’m sorry,” was all she could think of to say.

He grabbed her by the hand and pulled her through the crowd. She stumbled along behind him, trying to keep up, smiling at the people she pushed past so it didn’t seem weird that Zach was pulling her off the dance floor.

He kept going, past the punch bowl and the row of parent/teacher chaperones and through the big doors to the football field. There, everything was black and still. The stars overhead joined with a bright moon and set the goalposts aglow.

Zach finally stopped. “Why did you try to kiss me?”

“I didn’t. I lost my balance. It was stupid…” She sighed and looked up, immediately wishing she hadn’t.

“What if I wanted you to?”

“Don’t mess with me, Zach,” she said. Her voice cracked, betraying her. She knew his reputation. He probably said things like this all the time. He went through girlfriends like she went through lip gloss. “Please.”

“Can I kiss you, Lex?”

In her mind, she said no, but when Zach looked down at her, she shook her head, unable to find her voice.

“If you’re going to stop me,” he said, pulling her close, “this would be the time.”

And then he was kissing her and she was falling and flying, twisting into someone else, some
thing
else. When he finally drew back, he looked as pale and shaky as she felt, and she was glad of that, because she was crying.

Crying. What an idiot …

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No.”

“So, why are you crying?”

“I don’t know.”

“Zach!”

Lexi heard Mia’s voice and she lurched away from Zach, wiping the stupid tears from her eyes.

Mia ran up to them. “They’re crowning the homecoming king and queen. You better get in there.”

“I don’t give a shit about that. I’m talking to Lexi—”

“Go,” Mia said.

Zach looked at Lexi again, frowning; then he walked off, headed for the gymnasium.

“What were you two doing out here?” Mia asked.

Lexi started walking toward the gym. She didn’t dare look at her best friend. “He wanted to tell me something about the game tonight.” She forced a laugh. “You know me. I don’t know jack about football.” She winced. Another lie to her best friend. Who was she becoming?

It was the last time that night she and Zach were alone together until he walked her up to the front door of the mobile home, and even then, Mia was in the car, watching them.

At her door, Lexi had no idea what to say to him. Everything felt off balance; she was like some prey animal, frozen with fear, her senses acute. The kiss had rocked her world, but had it even made a ripple in his?

He stared down at her, his golden hair turned silver by the moonlight.

She wanted to scream
say something
but managed only a shaky smile. “Thanks for letting me be your sympathy date, Zach.”

“Don’t say that,” he said.

“Curfew,” Mia yelled from the car. “Mom will have a cow if we’re late.”

Zach leaned down, kissed Lexi’s cheek. It took all her effort not to respond, not to put her arms around him, but she just stood there, feeling his lips on her skin like a branding iron.

She stood there a long time, long after they’d left. Then, finally, she went into her house and turned off the lights.

*

Lexi didn’t go to school on Monday. How could she face either Zach or Mia after what had happened?

By Monday night, though (and he hadn’t called, of course he hadn’t, why would she think he would?), Eva had threatened to make a doctor’s appointment—something they definitely couldn’t afford.

So, on Tuesday, Lexi went back to school. Out at the bus stop, she huddled under the narrow shelter’s overhang, watching rain turn the world into a blue and green kaleidoscope.

She would just be cool.

She’d smile casually at Zach and keep walking, as if the kiss meant nothing. She wasn’t a complete idiot. It had just been a kiss from a boy who kissed girls all the time. Lexi couldn’t let it mean anything to her.

At school, she easily avoided Zach—they hardly moved in the same social circles—but there was no way to avoid Mia. Their lives were too braided together. After the last bell, Mia walked Lexi to work.

All the way downtown, Lexi kept a smile on her face as she listened to Mia’s dance play-by-play. Again. But the word
liar
screamed through her mind over and over, and every time she looked at her best friend, she felt sick to her stomach.

“We made out. Did I tell you that?” Mia said.

“Only about a million times.” Lexi stopped in front of Amoré, where a sweet, vanilla-scented air enveloped them. She meant to just say
later
and go inside, but instead she paused. “What was it like?”

“At first I thought his tongue was kinda slippery and gross, but I got used to it.”

“Did you cry?”

“Cry?” Mia looked confused, then nervous. “Should I have cried?”

Lexi shrugged. “What do I know about kissing?”

Mia frowned at Lexi. “You’re acting weird. Did something happen at the dance?”

“Wh-what could have happened?”

“I don’t know. Something with Zach, maybe?”

Lexi hated herself; she wanted to tell the truth, but the thought of losing Mia’s friendship terrified her. And what would be the point, really? It had just been a single kiss, not the start of anything. “No, of course not. I’m fine. Everything’s fine.”

“Okay,” Mia said, believing her. And that just made Lexi feel worse. “Later.”

Lexi walked into the ice cream shop. It was brightly lit, with a long glass and chrome ice cream counter and a small area that contained a few tables and chairs. In the warmer months, this place was hopping busy, but now, in mid-October, business was pretty slow.