No River Too Wide (24 page)

“And what if I say no?”

“Then I’ll have to ask you to stop coming. Because I’m not going to teach you together, and she registered first.”

Harmony couldn’t believe this. She had looked forward to being in the class with her mother, to seeing her every week—even if it wasn’t completely safe or advisable. Now Adam was wiping away that possibility.

She wanted to be angry, to be the injured party, to tell him what she thought of men in general, particularly those who tried to control women.

But in the end, she knew he was right.

She spoke the rest of her thoughts out loud. “I registered mostly because she was in the class. If we aren’t in it together, what’s the point?”

“You want my opinion?”

She shrugged, the best she could do.

“I’m not a psychologist, okay? But I’ve worked with a lot of angry people in my time, so I recognize the signs. You’re angry. I don’t know why, and I don’t know at whom, but you’re angry, Harmony, and learning to defend yourself can help you get control. Because a lot of time we’re angry at people who have used us badly, and knowing they can’t do it anymore?” He smiled a little. “It’s powerful.”

She wanted to tell him she wasn’t angry, but she knew the words would come out in a rush. An
angry
rush. Because Adam was right.

They stared at each other. He was willing to wait her out, something she wasn’t used to. In the end she was the one who broke eye contact. In addition to everything else, she knew that being in the other class would be safer. She and Jan wouldn’t be arriving at the same time on the same day. If anybody was trailing her to find her mother...

“Shall I just come next Wednesday instead? Or shall I wait for a phone call?”

“I’ll only call if the time doesn’t work out. But if it doesn’t, we’ll find one that does. I promise.”

“I don’t know how my life came to this,” she said before she’d even considered her words.

“You aren’t the only one,” he said cryptically.

She waited for an explanation, but none was forthcoming. She gave a final nod and left.

* * *

Taylor was smiling for no reason. She was aware of it and still helpless to stop. She was also humming, a monotonous, tuneless mixture of notes that didn’t resemble any song she had ever heard, but humming happily, nonetheless.

Adam’s class had gone well. He was a good teacher, with a good handle on classroom dynamics.

Adam himself? That was harder to think about. As were the moments when he’d held her against his body and looked deep into her eyes. Of course, a moment later he had slammed an elbow toward the side of her head, but still...

“What’s so funny?”

She looked up and found the man in her thoughts standing in her doorway. She smiled at him. “I was just thinking that most of the men who try to hold me in their arms aren’t planning to whack me in the head as part of the experience.”

“You were absolutely safe.”

“My head’s still on my shoulders, it’s true. I’m glad.”

“You were a great partner. You didn’t even squeal.”

“It happened too fast.”

“How about all those other men? You know, the ones who weren’t planning to whack you?”

“I may have exaggerated their numbers.”

“That would surprise me.”

She knew it was time to change the subject. “So, are you satisfied?”

“Only partly. I want to split the class. How would you feel about giving me Wednesday night, too, same time and place?”

“You’re kidding.”

“Not. Jan and Harmony can’t work together. You saw what happened. And the class is evenly divided between women who can move at a relatively fast pace and women who are going to require extra help. I’ve talked to most of them already and they’re willing to change to Wednesdays.”

“Without asking me?”

“I saw no point in asking you if they weren’t willing. But they all know it’s up to you. I told them it was just an idea, and the room might not be free.”

She tried to think of all the reasons why this was a bad idea. “Does this mean you’re teaching two classes?”

“You mean am I getting paid for the extra time? No. Same deal either way. Half the tuition. I have the time, so I don’t mind extra hours. What else am I doing?”

She thought that was an interesting question, so she pursued it. “What else
are
you doing? Are you finding enough in town to keep you occupied?”

“Exploring. Sightseeing. Checking out the business scene, neighborhoods.”

“Do you like what you see?”

He was looking at
her,
and he continued to, making it clear when he answered that he wasn’t talking about Asheville. “Very much.”

Taylor felt heat rising in her cheeks. “Glad to hear it.”

He didn’t pretend he’d meant anything else. “I realize that dating my boss is probably a bad idea. But considering how little you’re paying me, I think I can take a pass on that. Would you consider going out with me? Or should we stop the flirtation right here and make this relationship strictly business?”

“Flirtation?”

“You’re right. Not the best word. It’s not that innocent, is it? It’s more grown-up, more...interesting.”

“You’re pretty sure you’re reading me correctly.”

“I spent a lot of years learning to read people. I’m not always right, but I’m almost always close. And I’ve had a lot of training learning to read my own reactions.”

“And you’re reacting to me?”

“That’s a fair assessment.”

“Are you always this direct? Whatever happened to, ‘Want to catch a movie on Friday?’”

“Is that how it’s done?”

She had a strong sense he knew exactly how it was done. Adam was far too attractive not to have been through this moment multiple times. He was teasing her.

She stood and moved around the table to face him. “Let’s say we
were
flirting. Where would we go?”

“Anywhere you wanted.”

She folded her arms. “Do you like to hike?”

“I do if I’m not on a forced march.”

“So if we were flirting and I said I’d like to hike, you might agree.”

“I
would
agree.”

“I’ll have to remember that if we ever flirt again.”

“Come hiking with me on Sunday. Can you spare the time away from the studio? If you can’t, we could just grab dinner.”

“Maybe we should maintain a moderate distance. I do employ you.”

“Chicken feed.”

“The terms were your idea.”

“You can fire me if I get to be a problem.”

She didn’t think that was in the cards. “I’ll think about it. But it’ll be a short hike. Then you come to my house for dinner. Maddie likes you. I’ll feed you eggplant and broccoli and see how you do. You’re flirting with a vegetarian. Those are the ground rules.”

“I think I’ll sign on.”

“We’ll see. More grown-up, more...interesting?”

“A clever turn of phrase, wasn’t it?”

“Did you practice that?”

“It came out of my mouth fully formed. So how about the Wednesday night class?”

“Will you do all the organizing and get the details set up?”

“Already there, if you’ll give the permission.”

“I’m the one getting the bargain, so sure.”

“I liked demonstrating elbow strikes with you tonight.”

She couldn’t resist. “Just think twice about anything else you intend to demonstrate. I’m taking self-defense classes.”

“Wednesday nights? That’s going to be the fast class. And you’re definitely a fast learner.” He smiled before he disappeared back into the hallway.

Chapter 19

Jeremy was sitting on the front porch when Taylor, Jan and Maddie arrived home. Taylor watched as her daughter ran up the walkway and jumped into her father’s arms. Jan smiled at him and let herself into the house to give the three of them privacy.

“Big surprise,” Taylor said, in as friendly a tone as she could manage. Jeremy was given to whims, and apparently making the trip from Nashville to Asheville this evening without calling had been one of them. Had she known, she would have made arrangements for him to pick up their daughter at the studio.

“I know it’s late, and I’m sorry,” he said, setting Maddie on the ground but keeping an arm around her shoulders. “I expected to get here a lot earlier, but we had some car trouble. I thought I’d arrive before Maddie got home from school to surprise her. Then I thought we might not get here at all.”

Taylor liked Jeremy better than she used to. She had nearly forgiven him for impregnating her at sixteen and pretending—at least for a while—that he wasn’t the culprit. Through the years Jeremy had stepped up to become a good father. She didn’t forgive easily, though, and the faintest whiff of the past still lingered.

“Car fixed?” she asked when nothing better occurred to her.

“Everything’s fine. Willow’s at my parents’ house. They just got back from a cruise, and we wanted to surprise them, too.”

Taylor had known about the cruise. The senior Larsens were good people and, like her own father, often available as babysitters when they were in town in the summers and early fall. The rest of the year they lived in Florida, and Maddie was already looking forward to a trip to see them over spring break.

“What’s the occasion?” she asked. “For the visit.”

He gave a slight shake of his head, and she realized he wasn’t ready to explain. “Do you mind if she spends the night with us? I know it’s late and we won’t have much time together tonight. But if you don’t mind we’ll pick her up from school tomorrow and keep her for the weekend.”

Since Taylor and Jeremy had joint custody, even if she had objected, she would have needed a better reason than Jeremy’s lack of planning. Instead, she flashed on her upcoming date with Adam. “Will you bring her back sometime after dinner Sunday?”

“You need child care?”

“It might be helpful.”

“That’ll work. Half-pint, think you can get all your stuff together lickety-split?” he asked.

“Can I!” Maddie disappeared into the house, leaving her parents to face each other.

“Willow’s pregnant,” he said softly. “I didn’t want to blurt it out. We wanted some time alone to help her see it’s going to be a good thing for her, too.”

Taylor wasn’t in love with Jeremy, although the women who saw him in concert with the Black Balsam Drifters would probably think she was crazy. He was tall and broad-shouldered, with sun-streaked brown hair and blue eyes against a golden tan. He’d been the class bad boy in high school, and today he continued that onstage by dressing in black and singing country songs he’d written filled with sly sexual innuendoes and invitations. In reality, though, he was levelheaded and responsible, and while sharing a child they’d created when they were children themselves was never easy, they had muddled through the bad times.

With all that in their past, she was still surprised that she felt a stab of pain at the news his new wife was giving him another child. Not because she wanted that honor. But because Jeremy had clearly moved on with his life, and she? Well, she had hardly even been on a date since Maddie’s birth.

“Congratulations,” she said, forcing warmth into her voice. “I know Maddie will be thrilled to have a baby brother or sister.”

“I hope so. She’ll always be first in my heart.”

She was touched. “It took a while, though, didn’t it?”

“Never as long as you wanted to believe.” He smiled, as if he was so used to Taylor’s zingers that he didn’t even feel the sting. “But Willow and I are happier than I thought I could be. She keeps my feet on the ground and my head in the clouds so I can keep doing what I do best.”

“You’re really lucky.”

“What about you, T? Don’t tell me there’s not a guy out there for you?”

Jeremy hadn’t called her “T” since high school. She was so taken aback that for a minute his question just faded into the background.

“I’d forgotten you used to call me that.”

“You’ve forgotten a lot. Like how nuts I was about you.”

“What?”

He shook his head. “For years you’ve told yourself we were just two kids in high school fooling around to get back at our parents. But it’s not true. I was as in love with you as a seventeen-year-old guy can be. Which, granted isn’t all that much.”

“Jeremy Larsen! By the time I told you I was pregnant, you already had another girlfriend!”

“Because you dumped me. You don’t remember that?” He lowered his voice. “We were both virgins. That first time wasn’t very good for either of us, as I recall. You took off afterward and told me to get lost.”

“That’s not what happened.” But even as she said the words, she wondered. The pregnancy loomed large in her memory, but the way she had gotten pregnant, and the events immediately afterward did not. They had been eclipsed.

“It
is
what happened. And I ended up with another girl to get even with you. Don’t tell me you don’t remember any of this?”

“You denied Maddie was yours.”

“I was furious at you. And scared out of my mind.”

She didn’t know what to say.

“I
was
in love with you,” he repeated. “Although not so much when I found out I was going to be a father. I was a kid. I blamed it on you.”

She shook her head, not in denial, but in hopes that all the information in it would settle into the right spaces.

“Taylor, you were hot,” he said, and he winked. “And forbidden, which didn’t hurt.”

“Well, if any of this is true, it’s nice to know someone thought so once upon a time.”

“Are you telling me that one bad relationship all those years ago has soured you on men?”

“Wow, the ego!”

He grinned at her, and Jeremy had a substantially powerful grin. “So there’s a guy?”

Her view of the past was still jiggling around in her head. “It’s just been me and Maddie for so long. I know the surgery helped. I know she’s living a normal life now and that will probably continue. Her doctor’s optimistic we can start weaning her off her meds in another year. But I’m not sure—”

“I think you’ve forgotten what it’s like to have a normal life, too.”

“Normal? I have the studio and all that work.” She shrugged. “And what will Maddie think? A baby sister or brother, a stepmom, then me going off and finding some guy? It would be too much to cope with. It was just us before.”