Not In My Wildest Dreams (Dream Series) (20 page)

W
e started in with our Sangiovese, and, as the first course of Beef Filet Mignon Carapaccio arrived, she grilled me about business, and what JSS was doing in California. I fed her a complete line of bullshit and felt horrible about it, but I didn’t want to rock the boat by telling her I was here for her and her alone.

“I’d really love to get
you
in front of the camera,” I said. “Maybe that’s why I came.”

“You’re funny, Mr. Stevens. I’d never realized how comical you could be,” she replied. As she sipped her wine, I realized that she really, truly didn’t see what I saw, and likely what everyone, men and women alike, saw when they looked at her. A gorgeous woman with girl next door appeal. Beautiful, yet approachable.

“You really have no idea how stunning you are, do you?” I asked. I reached up and brushed the back of my fingers along her jaw and down her neck. I watched her eyes flutter closed as she tipped her head to the side so I could easily enjoy the graceful lines of her neck that left me in the most uncomfortable way. Where I initially thought my comfortable jeans would afford me space, should the beast in my pants misbehave, I was sorely mistaken when it came to the flood of emotions and feelings I was faced with when it came to Beth. What I wouldn’t give to be having this meal back in my room at the Hilton Sonoma. Dinner would be done and I’d have her stripped bare, taking every inch of my dick in her perfect pussy. She’d be looking at me with those fuck-tabulous eyes. I’d have her begging me to let her come.

Interrupted yet again, the second course arrived. Beth had ordered a venison loin with cabernet sauce for me, and a fish dish with artichokes and capers for herself. Glasses of wine, hand selected by the sommelier, were brought to accompany each dish.

I asked what her plans were now that she’d come back to California. Silently, I prayed that she wasn’t sure she was going to stay, or that she’d made a mistake and would say that she was packing her things and coming back to New York with me. I wanted to tell her that I’d already made flight arrangements for her to come home with me on Saturday, but as she talked about the opportunities she was looking into here in Napa, I felt about two inches tall.

“I really think I’d be good at the charity fundraising. I’ve done my fair share with the kids and their schools. It would be nice to work for a larger organization. With a far reaching purpose, you know? I’m going to look into the hospitals and local organizations this coming week.”

“I think you would be marvelous at whatever you put your efforts to. You know, JSS has many charitable functions throughout the year. You could work for me.” She looked at me, eyes-wide and stopped chewing. “On the West coast here, of course,” I added.

She nodded nervously, and finished her bite.

“I’m sorry to have overstepped,” I apologized.

“You have nothing to apologize for, Jack. I’m just—” she took a sip of wine. I watched her think. What I wouldn’t give to know what was going through her mind.

“How’s Phoebe?” I asked, swiftly changing topics. Helping Beth’s daughter get the interview for a network internship, and greasing the wheels for her transfer to NYU cost me a few favors, but if it made Beth happy, it was worth it. Beth relaxed and launched into telling me about the internship Phoebe landed at the network where I’d set up her interview.

“You didn’t have a hand in her getting that internship, did you?”

“She got the internship?” I hadn’t heard that she’d gotten the spot. I was so proud of her. She really was a terrific gal. I only hoped that the studio didn’t chew her up and spit her out. “I swear, I only got her the interview.”

T
his is what a dinner should be like. Pleasant chatting. Humorous banter.

Since I’ve gotten home, dinners with Greg have been awkward. I wasn’t sure if it was that way because of my “stunt” as he’d called it, or if that’s how Greg and I just
are.
Before my trip to New York, he was texting or working on a file during dinner, or wolfing his dinner down so he could get back to work. Since I’ve returned, he just sits there and makes small talk like we’re strangers. The kids, our day, the weather. I know I’ve only been back for five days, and half of those days were at a hotel, but even at the hotel…

“Can I tell you something?” Jack asked, interrupting my thoughts.

“Anything,” I replied, sipping the wine.

“I’ve been in love with you since the day I saw you at Ed Scott’s eating your salad.”

“Jack, I—”

“Let me finish,” he said, quieting me immediately. “Most of my life I’ve dominated women. When I told you that I was a Dominant, it was only part true. I’m actually a ‘switch.’ Sometimes I’m the Dom, sometimes I’m the submissive. But you are the first woman who has dominated my
heart
. You are the first woman that let those urges subside. I love being with you, and listening to you, and being happy for the things that make you happy. But most of all, I love being with you for how you make me feel about me. I’ve told you before that I’m a selfish man. I want you. Nothing more.”

I swallowed and let all of that roll over me. The Dom/submissive bit, the love… the happiness. If this were a movie, I had no doubt that he’d be producing an engagement ring.

Dinner was then set before us, thankfully breaking the tension a bit. When Marcus left, I looked at Jack. I didn’t know what to say.

“We don’t have to talk about this. Let it sink in, Beth. But I mean every word of it.” He searched my eyes. “Now eat. That’s the Dom in me speaking.” He winked, making me laugh a bit, and blasted me with a huge smile, a smile that radiated from his whole body. Like a huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders, even if that burden was now, in part, dumped on mine.

“Now, tell me about Phoebe’s internship,” he said, and like that, he moved the conversation into shallower waters.

T
he rest of our dinner was easy going as Beth spoke about Phoebe’s upcoming internship and that Phoebe was going to stay in her old apartment, while Kevin agreed to keep an eye out for her. She asked me if I would, too, which of course I promised I would, and I meant it. Then she dove into talking about Bradley and Carter. Before long, we were sipping espresso and a chill had settled in the valley.

As we drove home, Beth continued talking about the charity work she was looking into in the area. Suddenly, I couldn’t take it. The nearly full moon sent an impossible glow on her features and I needed to kiss her.

Quickly, I pulled the car over and threw it in park. I leaned over and kissed her. She tensed momentarily, then moaned and leaned in. Her soft pink tongue licked at the seam of my lips and my cock, already semi-hard all night long from sitting across from her at a hopelessly romantic table for two, was now as hard as steel. My fingers sought the delicate curves of her jawline and neck. I felt a calm rush through me, immediately followed by a consuming need for more. I wanted more, so much more, but not in a rented convertible. Then she sucked in my bottom lip in her super cute and seductive way. Our lips separated and our tongues slipped together. So comfortable and perfect.

Her arms came up and around my back, her nails raking at my shoulders, driving our passion further. I slid my hand down her front until I found her gorgeous breast, my hand forming around it. I could feel the delicate lace through the salmon silk that separated my hand from its prize. Her nipple was already pebbled.

I wanted her so badly, but not in a rented convertible. “I’m at the Hilton Sonoma. Come with me,” I urged, my lips not leaving hers.

I felt her hands at my chest, but they weren’t reaching for the buttons of my shirt. No, she was pushing back. Reluctantly, I let her.
Shit.
I saw it before she said it. I went too fast. I’d overstepped.

“Jack, this was a mistake. I came back to Napa to do the right thing. I’m trying to water the grass.”

“Beth, what we have is no mistake. I know you feel it. Right now you’re listening to your head. But what does your heart say?” I searched her eyes. I could see her heart. She was never very good at disguising her feelings from me.

“Please, take me home.” She fell silent and melancholy. My heart ached for her. Her struggle was clear on her face, even if it was as plain as day in her heart.

I drove those last five minutes to her house, with only radio breaking the silence. Part of me was at peace. I had Beth back at my side. But a piece of me was still ripped up inside. She’d pushed me away. I wanted to ask her if she was happy that she’d come home. I wanted to ask her if her husband was treating her right. However, I only wanted to ask those questions if the answers were ‘No’ to both questions, and then I’d drive us straight to the airport and we’d fly back to where she belonged—in New York, with me.

In her driveway, I turned the car off.

“Dinner was lovely. It was good seeing you again,” she said, not looking at me. She reached for the handle.

I hit the button for the lock, stopping her from leaving. “Why did you say yes?” I asked. “Why did you agree to have dinner with me?”

It wasn’t like Beth to be a tease. She ruled with her heart. She’d said
yes
because she wanted to be with me. That’s where her heart was safe, and she knew it. I picked up her hand and rubbed my thumb over the back of her knuckles.

“I’m sorry, Jack. I’m trying to do the right thing. Twenty years—I can’t explain it to someone who’s never been married. I came home to water the grass, but—And then I saw you this afternoon. And I was going to text you and say no—And then he called and needed to work late…” She blabbered, her voice quaking. She bit her lip to stop herself from going on. She was struggling. I hated to see her like this. I sat quietly, letting her talk.

“What, Jack? What are you thinking?” she asked.

She was so strong. I envied her. I was a mess, yet she was strong.

“Are you happy?” I asked.

She didn’t answer, her eyes fixed out the window. I searched her profile for the answer, and I could see it. Her jaw slightly tensing. Or maybe I was convincing myself of what I wanted to see.

“Is Greg taking care of you?”

Her lip started to quiver. My heart broke. She wasn’t happy. That ass wasn’t treating her right. I pulled her into my arms, kissing the side of her head, when I really wanted those lips again. But now wasn’t the time.

“It will take time,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“You can’t force your heart, Beth. What does your heart say? Because mine is saying that you complete me. Without you, I’m half a man.”

A tear leapt from her eye and flowed down her cheek. I started to well up as well.
Think, Jack! Think! Fight!

“I have to go see a few more locations tomorrow—for business. Would you like to come? You mentioned you knew the vintners near the restaurant. You could help me get in and scout the place.”

She turned to look at me wide eyed. “Which vineyard?”

“I think you said the names were Don and Rebecca??”

“Dan and Rachel?”

“That’s it! Yeah. Do you think they would be open to a shoot?”

“I can call her in the morning. You probably won’t be able to get in until after the lunch hour.”

“Perfect. Call me when you have our appointment.”

She laughed softly. “Is this what it’s like to work for you?”

Her laugh. That’s so much better than her tears. I reached up and dried her cheek with my thumb. “Are you applying?” She laughed again and shook her head again. “Stay put,” I commanded.

I unlocked the doors and got out, racing around to open her door for her. I helped her out and gave her one last look. I searched for a cue from her that I could kiss her, but her eyes flicked to the front of the house, and I decided against it, in case
he
was looking out the window at us.

“Call me tomorrow?”

She smiled and nodded. With a gentle squeeze of my hand, she then let go and walked to her front door. I waited until she was inside and a couple lights were turned on.

Unwilling to stand around and see if
he
was inside and came to her, I returned to my car and pulled out of the drive.