Nothing To Lose: A Grey Justice Novel (32 page)

Since she and Nick were now barely talking to each other, convincing others that they were ex-lovers might well prove the easiest part of the job.

“You’ve wandered off again, O’Connell.”
 

“No, I haven’t. I was just thinking how, if it becomes necessary, Nick and I are going to convince people we’re ex-lovers.”

“Why? Because you are lovers and you’re concerned you can’t pretend he’s your ex?”

“It wouldn’t be pretend…not really.”

“So he is no longer your lover?”

Without any idea it was about to happen, her lips trembled and tears pooled in Kennedy’s eyes. She missed talking to other women. If Julie were here, she’d spill her guts. With Irelyn, she wasn’t sure what to say. Even though she had glimpsed the occasional vulnerability behind her beautiful façade, she still wasn’t convinced that Irelyn felt emotions like other women.

Kennedy took a chance and confessed, “Nick is barely speaking to me.”

“Why?”

“That’s the thing. I don’t know. We made love for the first time a couple of weeks ago. And it was beyond spectacular. He even told me he loved me…had loved me for years. The next morning, he acted like it had meant nothing. Later, he said he meant everything he said, but he still acts so angry and cold. When I try to talk to him, he says we need to concentrate on this job, nothing more.”

An unusual, awkward expression appeared on Irelyn’s face. “Just so you know, I’m not the kind who’s going to hug your neck and tell you everything’s going to be okay. Got it?”

 
“I don’t need a hug or trite reassurances. Tell me what you would do.” As soon as she said the words, she knew the request was foolish. There wasn’t a man alive who could sleep with this beautiful woman and act like it meant nothing.

Surprising the hell out of her, Irelyn’s gaze went distant and unfocused as she said softly, “You act as if it meant even less to you. You pretend there’s nothing he can do or say that can hurt you. You become impenetrable to pain. He never has to know that each harsh word or uncaring act cuts so deep you feel as though you’re bleeding out.”

Kennedy was wise enough to know they were no longer talking about her and Nick. Who had hurt this woman so badly that she had to pretend to be impenetrable to pain? Grey? Or someone from her past?

As if she was aware of her exposure, she smiled slightly and her slender shoulders lifted in an elegant, dismissive shrug. “If that doesn’t work, toss him aside. If he’s too stubborn to see that you love him, that’s his problem.”

“But I don’t—” She swallowed the words, realizing she was about to deny something that she wasn’t sure about. Was she in love with Nick? Is that why his cold behavior had hurt so much?

“I need to run an errand, and from the look on your face, you need some time alone. Just be sure you’re comfortable with the layout of the mansion. You need to know every nook and cranny if something goes wrong. When I return, we’ll review the menu and utensils.”

Kennedy nodded, barely aware when Irelyn left the room. Yes, she would memorize the layout and be ready. For right now, she needed to consider the monumental realization she’d just experienced. She was in love with Nick.

How and when had it happened? When she’d fallen in love with Thomas, it had been a quiet knowledge…a gentle awareness that he was the man she was meant to be with. But now, with Nick, it wasn’t a calm, serene knowing. Her feelings were explosive, mind-boggling… absolutely astonishing. She wanted to sing, shout, cry, laugh and dance. And she wanted to get in his face and find out just what the hell was wrong. Then she wanted him to kiss her until they were both breathless with need.
 

“You’re either remarkably excited about your upcoming evening at Adam’s house, or something else is going on.”

Grey stood at the door, only a few feet away. When he wanted, he could be as quiet as a ghost.

“Just have a lot on my mind.” She winced. She’d said the same words to Irelyn. She really needed to come up with some better excuses.

“I’m sure you do. I wanted to reassure you that our team will be right outside the mansion, and infrared cameras will pinpoint each person. Once Nick begins his search, we can follow his progress. If anyone is coming his way, he’ll have a few seconds’ notice to either hide or get out.”

A few seconds didn’t sound like a lot, but she was grateful for any advanced warning. The thought of Nick being caught by Adam’s guards worried her a lot more than being in the presence of evil men.

“Can I ask you a question, Grey?”

“Certainly.”

“As grateful as I am to be involved in going after the Slaters, I can’t help but wonder why you allowed an amateur like me to do this. Nick told me about all the people working for you. I’m sure there’re others who could do what I’m doing…probably with their eyes closed.”

“That’s true…though maybe not with their eyes closed.” He shrugged as if unsure how to explain. “What happened to you was immensely personal. I believe every person has a right to gain their own justice, if possible. You deserve your pound of flesh. And don’t underestimate yourself. You’ve done an exceptional job capturing Adam’s attention.”

“Thank you. And thank you for allowing me to be a part of this. You’re right. Being personally involved in gaining justice is enormously rewarding.”

He nodded solemnly and started to back out of the room. Kennedy couldn’t help but make sure he knew how grateful she was to someone else. “I couldn’t have done any of this without Irelyn, either. She’s a remarkable woman.”

“Yes, she is.”

“Now she could have done this with her eyes closed.”

Something like sadness flickered in his eyes. “I agree. There’s nothing that Irelyn can’t do.”

“How long have you two been together?”

As if he feared she’d be asking even more inappropriate questions soon, he gave her his signature enigmatic smile, said, “Not nearly long enough,” and retreated.

Kennedy returned her attention to the diagram in front of her. She would complete this job and make sure the people responsible for Thomas’s murder paid for their sins. Then she wanted to move on with her life. The question was—would Nick want to move on with her?

“Okay, move around the room one more time. The feed was a little blurry, but I think we’ve got it fixed.”

Holding the phone to her ear, Kennedy made her way around her bedroom once more and without thought, sang softly to herself, “August Mendoza had a problem and asked Stuart Singleton to help him out. Then Omar Delucci told Stefano Denzi—”

“How’s that?”

Kennedy grimaced, feeling silly. She was no great composer or singer. “Sorry, I made up a song to help me remember the men’s names.”

There was the slightest pause on the other end, telling her she’d surprised Grey. “Well, that’s…different.”

“So is the picture clearer?”

“Yes. Perfect.”

“That’s good. I don’t think I could find another place to put this thing.” And she wasn’t exaggerating. The short, sleeveless, backless cocktail dress had precious little material, much less a place to pin a jeweled brooch. Fortunately, the shoulder straps were wide enough to accommodate matching jeweled brooches, one of which held the tiniest camera she’d ever seen.

“Eli is headed your way…ETA, five minutes.”
 

“Okay. Thanks.”

“Talk to you when you get home. And don’t worry, we’ve got your back,” Grey said.

Her back wasn’t what she was worried about. What if Nick got caught and someone hurt him? Even if they believed his excuse for breaking in, that didn’t mean they wouldn’t do something to him. A stalking ex-lover might make them angry, give them incentive to teach him a lesson. What if she couldn’t stop them? What if they—

“You look...amazing.”

She turned to see Nick standing at her bedroom doorway. His gaze swept up and down her body, hot enough to melt her clothes off. Kennedy shivered at the look. This was the first time since the night they’d made love that he had shown her anything but polite indifference.
 

“I can’t figure you out.”

A small smile lifted his mouth, but his eyes remained solemn. “It’s not worth your time to try. Just wanted to reassure you that everything will be fine. I should have no trouble getting inside. Justice has assured me anyone headed my way should be no problem to detect.”

She nodded. They’d gone over this a dozen times. Adam’s people would disarm the security alarms while the guests arrived. This would enable Grey’s team to hack into the alarm company, override their system and show a false reactivation. Nick would be able to enter without alerting anyone to his presence. Everything should go fine as long as he didn’t get caught.

“And you’ll just be searching Adam’s office, nothing more.”

“Yes. Eli is certain any damning files that exist will be there. By the time your meal is finished, I should have the entire room searched.”

“If you get caught—”

He shook his head. “Stop worrying about me. You’ve got enough to deal with.”

The doorbell rang, alerting her that Eli had arrived. She wanted to say more…so much more. Instead, she turned to grab a small, jeweled purse from the dresser. When she turned back, she was surprised to see the worry in Nick’s expression.
 

Moving toward the door, she mustered a reassuring smile. “Don’t look like that. You’re the one taking the risk. I’ll be enjoying a twelve-course feast and listening to scintillating conversation.”

She was about to slip by him when he grabbed her elbow and pulled her into his arms. Warm masculine lips pressed a soft kiss on her forehead as he whispered gruffly, “If anything happens to you, I’ll never forgive myself.”

Kennedy closed her eyes, drawing strength from his hard, strong body. She didn’t know what Nick’s issues were…she might never know. However, she didn’t doubt that he cared.

“I’ll be fine.” And before she did something crazy, like drawing his face down to her and kissing that beautiful, unsmiling mouth, she pulled out of his arms. “See you in a few hours.”

She could feel his eyes follow her as she stopped at the hall closet for her coat and then made her way to the front door. Before she opened it, she stopped for a quick second, took the small, silent breath that Irelyn insisted as an imperative, and then pulled the door open to reveal an equally bleak-looking Eli. Refusing to allow the doubts that were apparently shared by both Nick and Eli, she greeted him with a cheerful, “Let’s get this party started.”

Chapter Twenty-nine

Nick kept one eye on the clock and the other on the large monitor revealing Adam’s dinner guests. Not being able to hear the conversations was frustrating, but they’d had no choice. Knowing that strict screening would be applied to everyone, including the use of bug-detection devices, they’d eschewed everything but the small camera attached to Kennedy’s dress. It was doing a good job of showing faces. And Grey had two expert lip-readers who were carefully watching as well. Between the five of them, surely to hell they could get something incriminating to work with.

Everything was going as planned, and yet nothing felt right. Maybe it was his own shitty attitude that was souring his opinion. He and Kennedy were acting like strangers with each other. His fault, not hers.
 

She had said she couldn’t figure him out. He couldn’t blame her for feeling that way. One minute he was telling her he was in love with her, the next he was treating her like she meant nothing. And she meant everything.

His behavior was both ridiculous and juvenile. So she’d felt guilty for screwing her husband’s best friend. So what? He felt guilty, too. Had lived with that feeling for years. There were certain rules in friendship, and he’d broken a cardinal one. An honorable man didn’t fall in love with his best friend’s wife. And now he’d slept with the widow of his best friend. You didn’t get much scummier than that.

Kennedy’s guilt was understandable, too. She’d told Nick that she still talked to Thomas…meaning she still saw him as her husband. Walking in on their one-sided conversation after a night of no-holds-barred passionate sex with him had been jarring. Well…so the hell what? Had he expected something else? A declaration of love? He knew that was never going to happen. And just because she’d responded with an explosive passion meant nothing. Kennedy was a healthy young woman who’d been alone for almost two years. The need for physical intimacy was as natural as taking a breath. It only made sense that she would turn to a man she trusted. But her heart would always belong to Thomas.

And now he was treating her like a stranger, barely speaking to her, and when he did, he was unfailingly polite. It was a testament to her patience that she hadn’t picked up the nearest hard object and slammed the thing into his thick skull.

The hole he had created was a deep one. How could he explain his behavior without telling her what he had overheard? Part of his reluctance was pride—he freely admitted that. Stupid him had been so damn happy about what had happened, he hadn’t allowed himself to think how Kennedy might have felt. And now they had a crevice between them he wasn’t sure could ever be breached.