Obfuscate (14 page)

“Oh, thank the Goddess!” I let out an exhale and sat on the edge of my seat, eager to learn all the details. “We can do that. Does the blood need to be wholly human or will our vampyric blood satisfy? Oh wait, will our blood do something odd to them?”

“That is a decision you’ll need to address among yourselves. Whichever your choice, it could influence his development.”

I looked at Khaldon; his face didn’t seem to reveal any answers either.

Ludovic would have known what to do.

“In the meantime, it’s probably best to have him on the human sustenance that he needs. Sheridan has expressed she wants to breastfeed, but she won’t be able to create that kind of nourishment for the dhampir until she’s recovered.”

Dr. Meyer looked at the floor and came up with a breath, stalling or bracing himself for an attack. “However, the infant girl … she … she did not make it. She had a faulty heart valve which we saw on the ultrasound this morning. We operated immediately, but her defective heart could not maintain an electrical rhythm.”

My hands held my face in shocked horror. “What? You mean … Teagan didn’t—”

My father inquired, “Teagan?” His face crumpled from the sound of mom’s middle name. He scooted to the edge of his chair and held his head on his fists.

Khaldon whispered, “A daughter?”

“The boy is very healthy and does not seem to show any signs of the same heart defect. I’m very sorry for your family’s loss,” Dr. Meyer stated with saddened brows. His own face on the verge of crumpling in grief.

“But I was holding her!” I exploded. “She looked at us with the bluest of eyes. She was alive!” I stood up convinced I didn’t hear right.

“You have us mixed up with some other patient. She has black hair!” My voice cracked with sobs. “She has blue eyes! Her name is Teagan!”

Dr. Meyer stood up, as did the rest of us. His eyes welled with emotion. He took my hands and enclosed them in his. “I’m sorry, Cheyenne. I know this is terribly difficult. This kind of news is always tragically bittersweet.” He steadied himself. “Fortunately, mom and son are doing well, and you’ll be able to see them in a little while. But we’ll need to make arrangements for her daughter.”

Torchy had moved closer to Dr. Meyer. The tendons in his neck protruded. His rigid muscles clenched his jaw tight. It looked like he was doing everything he could to keep from shifting and eating the doctor.

Khaldon’s chin trembled as he pulled me in close to him. His own breath hitching in his chest.

I squinted in denial and suddenly became intensely sick to my stomach. “Dr. Meyer, does Sheridan know?”

He cleared his throat. “She’s still unconscious.” He stalled and shifted his weight to the other foot. “This is going to be very difficult when she awakes and wants to see her daughter. I strongly encourage you to be here for her when she wakes up.”

A fog of sludgy silence filled the room. I fell into a vortex of mind-numbing grief.

This isn’t happening! Oh dear, God! No! I’m begging you … No!

Kind, gentle hands lay upon my back as I sobbed uncontrollably.

Torchy whispered an Irish prayer in Gaelic. My father joined in, and by the time the prayer was over we all were whispering the words between heaving sobs.

I reached out for my family to anchor me in this reality. We hung our heads in desperate prayers, heaving chests, and vanquished hearts.

What did we ever do to deserve this?

I
t was
the fourth worst night of my life. The first being the night we learned our mother was murdered. The second when I was left for dead by a rogue vampire. The third when Dakota was killed in front of me, and then—last night.

It was the worst.

We had a tormented, painful evening explaining to Sheridan what had happened with Teagan. She screamed, demanding for us to leave, insisting we were lying to her, and accusing us of stealing her daughter.

Frantically, Sheridan’s wild eyes searched for Teagan from room-to-room. She banged on patients’ doors, convinced someone was hiding her. There was one baby who had a very similar cry to Teagan’s, and Sheridan demanded to see the child. She accused the other mother of cutting the baby’s hair and dying it blond. She wanted to contact the FBI.

If I were honest with myself, I can’t say I would have acted any differently if the same situation had happened to me.

Dr. Meyer administered a sedative to help calm her down, but Sheridan’s inconsolable wailing continued to echo through the halls. I was afraid she would rupture her staples clamoring to be let into the nursery. The hospital staff called security and moved Sheridan to a room much further away from the rest of the maternity patients.

On Dr. Meyer’s orders, the nursing staff administered a second sedative to help Sheridan find comfort, but the only thing that would quiet her was holding Khai in her arms. Finally, while I stroked her hair, and Torchy holding her beside him, she fell into a disquieted sleep as the drug took effect. She jerked while sleeping, and I could tell she was still searching for Teagan even beyond the veil.

I prayed Morpheus could bring her the peace none of us had been able to provide. My heart ached for women who had still-born babies and had to leave the hospitals with empty baby baskets.

It was real horror. The kind you prayed never happened to you or your family.

The hospital staff asked that we leave for a while and find solace and rest for ourselves. I regretted leaving Sheridan alone. It didn’t feel like the right thing to do, but there was nothing any of us could do but love and support her.

By mid-morning the next day, Daddy, Khaldon, Torchy, and I returned to the maternity ward hoping to help ease the suffering of the prior events. Unfortunately, I knew Sheridan’s heartache and pain were only halfway done.

I had to be the one to deliver the final blow.

I watched as Sheridan cradled and rocked baby Khai in an instinctive motherly fashion. She seemed to be receptive to my presence, despite last night’s events. I wondered if she even remembered what had happened. There was a part of me that hoped she didn’t.

“Ya know, Sheridan—I’ve heard of breastfeeding advocates, but I can tell you, I’ve never met a bloodletting advocate.”

Sheridan waved goodbye to the ladies who stopped by to help her with Khai’s new feeding schedule. “I wasn’t really sure what to expect either, Chey. It’s not like I would find an article in
Time Magazine
about how to blood-feed your dhampir child.”

“You have a valid point.” I tried to paint on the kindest smile I could muster.

Sheridan seemed much calmer than the night before, almost as if a sense of peace had come over her. Captivated by the antics of her new son, she continued the conversation. That was a good sign.

“At least Dr. Meyer helped me learn how to feed him naturally. I didn’t want to try to drain blood from a shunt and then bottle-feed.”

I asked the question I’d been thinking for weeks. “How in the world is your body going to keep up? Won’t you like shrivel up or something?”

“I thought so too, but I’m not the first human to have a dhampir child.” She actually smiled at my silly question and tweaked Khai’s nose. “Dr. Meyer instructed me to drink three times as much water and electrolytes than I did before. Plus he prescribed these specialty vitamins to avoid anemia.” She shrugged as though she were feeding a normal, human baby. That fact that Khai needed blood to help sustain his system didn’t seem to be any issue at all. “Dr. Meyer also said this bloodletting part won’t last too long before Khai can accept donated whole blood.”

This was definitely something I’d never considered. “Do they make whole blood baby formula?” I put away my magazine and stood. “Can Torchy line that up from his suppliers through The Super Market?”

“I’m not sure.” Her face lit up with a soft smile. “If anyone would know, he’s the guy.”

I watched as she shifted Khai from her breast to the crook of her arm and then held her wrist out to his mouth. Instinctively, his little fangs dropped and pierced her skin. Khai drank her blood as happily as he did her milk. Sheridan already looked like a pro-mom.

I winced. “Does that hurt? It’s not like the baby can enthrall you to take away the pain.” Watching my nephew drink his mother’s blood made even me squeamish. Baby blood suckers just sounded creepy as hell. I supposed I could get used to it if she could.

“It’s a little uncomfortable.” She shrugged again. “But his saliva helps to close the wound. So after you’re over the whole
he’s drinking my blood thing
, it’s not so weird. This is what he needs, and I am his mother.” She looked at me with a
what the hell else am I supposed to do
face.

“You’re gonna be a great mom, Sher. I just know it.”

Tracing his chubby little cheeks while he ate, a silent tear from her dripped onto Khai’s hand.

I stood and then squatted down beside them, hugging them tight. We fell into a calming, rhythmic sway in time with our heartbeats.

The silence comforted my aching loss for a few stolen moments, but the weight was as vast as a bottomless, black ocean.

Sheridan exuded sorrow in plumes of soured scent around her. Our hearts were breaking at the loss of Teagan. I would have bet if she didn’t have Khai to hold and care for, she could have easily chosen to leave this physical plane to join her daughter.

There were just never any words to heal the loss of a child.

My heart died another silent death knowing that I now needed to tell the family about Dakota.

How can I do this? Breathe … find the right words.

Wanting to find a way to perk her up as much as possible, I stood and poured a cup of cold water from the pitcher on the rolling cart. “Hey, although you had alien man diggin’ his way to China from your insides less than twelve hours ago, you’re looking real good. How’re you feeling? Is there anything I can get for you? Do you want me to brush your hair or rub your back?”

She gave me a half-hearted smile, but she was trying to keep it together. “I have quite a bit of pain in my right shoulder, but Ruthie Anne says that’s normal from the anesthesia wearing off from the epidural.” She rolled her right shoulder back to loosen up the muscle as though she’d been programming for hours.

I recognized that pain from way too many all-night gaming sessions and date nights with Khaldon online. “Maybe Torchy can help it feel better.” I gave her shoulder blade a rub and her muscle was harder than an anvil.

She leaned forward, away from my hands, wincing. “I need morphine and an industrial size heating pad. Here—can you hold Khai for a couple minutes?”

“Sure. Is it okay to bring the guys in now? They’ve been dying to see you and the baby.”

Idiot!

I cringed at my stupid, insensitive words. I grimaced and stared at Khai, realizing those were the worst words I could have chosen at a time like this.

Sheridan shot me a sideways smirk while she handed me the baby. “Yeah, gimme a minute.”

“I’m sorry, Sher. I’m a jerk.” My eyes pleaded forgiveness.

“I know, but I still love ya.” She touched my arm and pulled me in for a hug. After a long moment and Khai’s squirmy body wanting attention, Sheridan reached for her walker and scooted to the bathroom.

My gaze stared into Khai’s immense brown eyes. “So, you little monster—couldn’t wait to get some fresh air? Too cramped for quarters?” I patted him on the back until a substantial air bubble burped out of him. He might be half-vampire, but he was half-human too.

I hadn’t held a baby since Dakota was born. I was just a wee tyke myself. My heart ached more with memories of my sister as they flashed through my mind like old, yellowed pages of a photo album.

Sheridan stepped out of the bathroom and I adjusted her hospital bed into a sitting position. She shuffled gingerly, being careful not to strain her incision. She reached for Khai as though he grounded her to this life. I handed him to her, and his smile captivated us. She tickled his toes and he blew bubbles. Seemed odd that a tiny newborn could be smiling already.

It must be gas.

“I’ll be back in a minute.”

Torchy, Khaldon, and Daddy had been in the adjoining waiting room. I motioned for them to come on. “Hey, guys, can you bring in a couple of extra chairs?”

It was a joyous moment of family love even though it was under such unusual circumstances. We took pictures of everyone holding Khai. Khaldon was especially smitten with him. A sound sleeper, Khai slept through all the
oohs and aahs
and even snored a little. It seemed a bit strange for a newborn to exhibit attributes of an older child already. But dhampir children would grow just as fast after they were born. By seven, they were fully grown humans, and that is how the queen had built her dhampir army. Sheridan and Khaldon were victims of that plan, and we knew we needed to watch over Khai, and to keep Amicula’s paws off him.

Torchy rubbed Sheridan’s back, and it looked as though she might fall asleep any moment. He must have a much gentler touch, or maybe he has the ability to send heat through his hands. She was relaxed, and I could sense a tender and genuine love forming between them. Khaldon even winked at me when he too noticed the bond building between them.

I took a deep breath and knew the time had finally come. I couldn’t delay the inevitable any longer. I stood up and walked toward the window and drummed a nervous tempo with my fingers on the marble pane.

“What’s the matter, Cheyenne? Come back over and sit with us. Are you all right?” Sheridan asked.

How would Lady Caz handle this situation?

My gaming avatar, Lady Cazenove, who always ate fear as though it were a bag of Cheetos, never stalled or delayed in what she needed to do. She was direct, confident, and never second guessed herself. She always protected her online guild members inside the game and beat off any baddie with her katana.

But this time, it was only me and I was scared as hell.

Would they blame me? Hate me for failing them?

Now, having to share the news of Dakota with my family, after losing Teagan, was more than I could do. But I had to. It was my place to do it.

I shot a glance at both Khaldon and Torchy for confirmation. Was the moment right?

They each gave me a head nod.

I can do this.

I skulked over to Sheridan and squatted down in front of her. In a whisper I asked, “I was—was wondering if you needed help in making the arrangements for Teagan.”

I watched the fleeting moment of happiness drain from Sheridan’s face as her smile turned to a flat expression in a single heartbeat.

“I honestly haven’t wanted to think about it.” Her voice cracked again. “I’m afraid I was rather obscene and vulgar to the nurses on the last shift. I threw my water pitcher at them. I just … just couldn’t handle it.”

Unwanted tears threatened to fall, but I had to be strong for her and for our father.

I grabbed the tissue box from the rolling bed cart, snatched a few Kleenexes, and dabbed my eyes. I handed her the box. She reluctantly accepted it and held the box in her lap, all while watching my face for telltale signs.

“I have something I need to tell both of you.” The tone of my voice resigned. My eyes shifted from my father to Sheridan.

Torchy stood up and offered to take Khai from Sheridan’s arms. She handed him the sleeping babe and plumes of nervous questioning radiated from her pores.

I stared at them both and bit my lip hard enough to taste blood. “Look, umm … I want to help however you need me to, okay? I’m here for you in any capacity you need. Please know that.”

Sheridan blew her nose and wiped her face. Both she and Daddy stared back at me with questioning eyes. I scooted a chair closer to both of them and reached for their hands. They each reluctantly took hold of a hand and I pulled them in close, inhaling a deep breath of prayer for the right words.

Both Torchy and Khaldon had moved in and flanked either side of me. I hoped it was their non-verbal show of support for delivery of this horrific news.

She nodded her head. “Of course, I know—”

I cut her off.

It was now or never.

I sat straight up and looked down into the depth of their eyes. “I have to tell you something, and truthfully, there’s
never
going to be a good time to talk about it.”

They sat there waiting for me to speak.

My mouth wouldn’t open and my voice was lost until I blurted it out. “We found Dakota.”

Sheridan stole a breath and held it. Her face already contorting. My father also held his breath, but his bottom lip hinted at a tremble. I could clearly see he wasn’t doing much better than my sister.

“They set a trap for us. We don’t know who, but they set a trap to stop anyone who tried to rescue Dakota. But we think we were specifically targeted.”

I swallowed a thick mass of grief as my words finally spilled out of my mouth. “The trap … the trap set off a bomb. We … we …
oh, God
… we lost Dakota and Ludovic.” Uncontrollable tears flowed over my cheeks. “They almost killed us. We’ve been recuperating in a Phuket Hospital.” I wiped my face, smearing the bloody tears and took out another tissue. “We barely escaped with our own lives.”

They blinked in what seemed like shocked denial.

Squeezing my father’s hand, it felt numb as there was no resistance. I looked him deep into his eyes and whispered. “She’s gone, Daddy. I tried to save her, but Dakota is gone.” My horror overcame me as I couldn’t control my grief any longer.