One Handsome Devil (25 page)

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Authors: Robert Preece

BOOK: One Handsome Devil
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All of Sara's anger drained from her. Katra looked forward to Sunday dinners at Maura's as one of her rare escapes from her family. “I'm sure there's a rational explanation for all of this,” she told Maura.

"That's what Reverend Bob talked about in his sermon, Sara. How being rational all the time is the way to the devil. If you would just come to church more often, none of this would be happening."

Maura might just be right about that, Sara thought.

"I'll talk to Katra,” Sara told her grandmother.

"That'll make one of us."

"Oh, Nana.” Her grandmother spent a great deal of time at church but she paid more attention to the
thou shalt not
than she did to the
as we forgive others
.

"Oh,
Truth of the Bible
is on the tube. Gotta go."

Sara sat for a good thirty seconds listening to the dial tone and trying to decide what to do. She'd tossed Jack out on his ear—a complete overreaction to what he'd done. In fact, the Miata drove better than it ever had before and hardly seemed to need any gas at all. Since she'd dumped him, she didn't have much grounds for complaining if he decided to pursue another woman. She could hardly blame Katra for picking him up on the rebound. Screw the logic, though. She was pissed and hurt.

She picked up the phone and dialed her best friend's number wondering if this was the last time she would do so.

"Hello."

"It's Sara."

"Oh, hi Sara. How's the job hunt?"

"Not doing as well as your boyfriend hunt, that's for sure."

The silence on the other end of the line was deafening.

"I said—"

"I heard you,” Katra interrupted. “You know, I always thought you were the rational one. Maybe you'd better go back to thinking for a while. You're not doing too well at these emotional responses."

For the second time in ten minutes, Sara listened to the sound of a dial tone. Katra had hung up on her.

Except what was Katra doing home in the middle of the day. Katra, at least, still had a job.

Sara stomped into her bedroom, dug out a crop-waisted tank top and a short skirt that showed off her legs, smeared on her reddest lipstick, and headed for the door. She had a perfect right to have an emotional response and she intended to tell Katra just that. If Jack happened to get caught in the crossfire, well that was his lookout.

* * * *

"This has got to be the funniest thing I've ever heard of.” Katra was holding one of the papers Jack had spent the past twenty-four hours filling out. As if answering questions on whether he would rather eat alone in a restaurant or call room service would expose any secrets.

"I'm pretty sure all of my answers were correct,” he said when he recognized the test form she was holding.

"Yep. Every single one."

"So what's the problem?” Every time he thought he understood humans, he realized he had missed something important. Now Katra was mad because he'd answered the questions correctly.

"The problem is you finished that test in five minutes. It's supposed to take three hours and nobody gets them all correct."

"But—"

"But nothing.” Katra threw his test printout on the table. “Here's the really funny thing.” She handed him a carefully drawn spiderweb stretched between a number of letters.

"I take it this is some sort of career guidance."

"If you want to call it that."

"What is it saying? That I should repair cars?"

"It says you want to be a philosophy professor."

A wave of longing so strong Jack could hardly recognize the emotions swept over him. To teach the young, to work in a community of scholars seeking knowledge, to have a place where he was welcome, belonged. For him, this was the impossible dream. These weeks with Sara had whetted his appetite for more. The fantasy that a demon could have a positive relationship with a woman opened the door to more impossibilities. According to Greek mythology the greatest curse from Pandora's box was hope. Jack had opened that box. Now he would pay the price.

He hardened his expression. “I'm sorry. What did you say my career guidance said?"

"It said you want to be a philosophy professor. What a joke.” Katra started to snicker but things went downhill quickly. By the time her door exploded open and Sara stomped in, Katra was rolling on the floor gasping for air and with tears running down her cheeks.

"I can't believe you two.” Despite an overly bright lip coloring, Sara looked magnificent. Her face was in high color, her hands, balled into fists, stuck into her hips, and her long elegant legs looked like they were about to launch into a Tae Bo kickboxing exhibition.

Katra made an honest effort to control her laughter but fell far short. “Eth—uh, eth—the test says you should teach eth—” Her words trailed into more giggles and an occasional hiccup.

"Hi Sara. We've been—"

"I'm not blind. What I don't understand is why you had to rub Maura's nose in it."

Jack could almost feel the situation slipping from his control—a not unfamiliar sensation for demons. “I think Sara is under the impression that we have created a sexual alliance."

"Brilliant observation, Sherlock. And I don't hear you denying it."

Katra reached for a tissue and blew her nose. She was still hiccuping from her laughter. “I told you Maura would call within five minutes."

Jack reached into a pocket, pulled out a quarter, and set it on the coffee tale. “Perhaps I've overestimated the human race once more."

"No editorial comment. You lost fair and square.” Katra took the quarter and put it in her jeans pocket. “I want to keep this one so I can gloat about beating this supposed genius."

Katra's attack of the hiccups seemed to be frustrating Sara more than ever. Any demon in the world would walk away now, let Katra's denials fall on Sara's deaf ears and relish the suffering. Jack couldn't.

"Katra is helping me,” he told Sara. “We don't have good guidance counselors where I come from."

* * * *

"What?” Sara had expected denial, lies, excuses. She certainly hadn't expected such a left-field explanation. “I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I was driving you crazy, getting on your nerves."

It didn't say much for Sara as a human or a lover, but she couldn't deny the accusation. “But we could have worked things out if you'd just stuck with me.” She put her hand in front of her mouth. She wasn't going to beg, to plea for Jack to return.

"Katra told me that many of your adolescents have a similar problem. They have the skills to strike out on their own but they don't know how to apply themselves. So they run around causing trouble and generally being obnoxious monsters."

"Well that's something Katra would know about.” Sara folded her hands behind her back and leaned against the wall. Sometimes it took Jack a while to weave around whatever he wanted to say. At least he never lied. Of course he hadn't denied having sex with Katra either. Given the way he'd looked at that slut in the Sammy Delight, Jack didn't seem the one to resist temptation. Dressed up, Katra could be a pretty tempting dish.

"So she told me about guidance counselors. They have tests they give the kids and then they help them match their skills with their interests. Katra just discovered my hidden interest in becoming a college philosophy instructor."

Sara's head rang as loudly as when Maura had wacked her upside of it the time she and Katra had decided to hitchhike to the Muppets concert when they'd been six. “Why would you want to be a philosophy instructor?"

"Not just philosophy. Ethics,” Katra put in. She was still giggling but the hiccups had subsided to an occasional hic.

"I spent a great deal of the past several thousand years thinking about ethical issues."

Sara hadn't meant to offend Jack, but obviously she had. “I guess that makes sense. But I think you need to have a Ph.D. to teach college.” Sara had done well enough in college but the idea of staying around for years more to get even more degrees almost nauseated her. Why spend your life hemmed in in a classroom when the outdoors was waiting?

"We've been working on that,” Katra explained. “As it turns out, Jack is very intelligent."

"Well duh.” Did Katra really think Sara would be attracted to some idiot just because he had a body to die for an a sexual stamina that would do an eighteen year-old proud. We—ll?
Don't go there
, she advised herself.

"I mean off the charts smart."

"Oh. Like a high I.Q."

"Sort of."

"How can you have a sort of high I.Q. Either it is or it isn't."

"If you can't find an I.Q. test that makes you miss a single problem, then you can't really measure it. He's just off the charts."

"They were silly questions,” the object of their discussion put in. “I am intrigued by the idea of teaching in one of your Universities, however. Of course it is quite impossible."

Sara might be pissed but she was still a loyal friend. “Of course it isn't impossible. We'll win that trivia game in New York and that will give you the money to pay for your tuition.” How she'd pay for her own expenses, that was another question.

"Money is only one of the problems,” Jack argued.

"By the way, we didn't have sex,” Katra put in. “I thought you would trust me at least a little."

Guilt and relief battled for primacy. She had come in loaded for bear only to find Jack working on his career goals. “But—"

"But nothing, girl. You've got this love thing so bad you don't know what you're doing."

Sara plopped down in one of Katra's dining room chairs and put her face in her hands.

"I forgive you,” Katra told her.

"It isn't that.” She snuck a look at Jack who was sitting on the couch looking off into space.

"What, then?” Katra poured her a cup of coffee then sat down next to Sara.

"I thought Jack and I were going to be partners. You know, prospect together, make a few bucks. You know, shared interests."

"So now you're worrying that your whole relationship is based on the fact that you can't keep your hands off that hunk of male demon."

Sara nodded miserably, took a sip of Katra's bitter coffee, then blew her nose. “Great sex isn't enough to build a relationship on. Especially since the two of us come from different backgrounds."

"Different backgrounds—that's the understatement of the year,” Katra said. “I'm not so sure about the first part of what you said. I wouldn't mind basing a long term relationship on great sex. The longer the better."

"You've got a dirty mind.” Despite herself, though, Sara giggled.

"Cause I haven't got any lately."

That put things in perspective. While Sara was obsessing over how to fit the real Jack into her dreams of a partnership with a man, Katra was running from a maniac and hadn't had sex in months. It made Sara feel petty. “I'm sorry."

"Hey, I wasn't asking for you to fill in.” Katra started giggling again.

"If I understand correctly, college professors have quite a bit of time when they aren't teaching.” Jack had obviously overheard Sara's concerns. “I would be able to help you with your prospecting whenever I wasn't in class."

"I don't want help.” What she wanted was someone who wanted to be her partner, not someone who felt obligated to tag reluctantly along. “Besides, you don't even have a high school degree. It'll take forever before you land a college job."

"You going anywhere, girlfriend?” Katra demanded.

Again, Sara was rocked on her heels. She didn't think of herself as selfish, but that's the way she'd been acting with Jack. She'd overreacted when he'd worked on her car, gotten jealous out of her brain when she thought he was having sex with Katra, gotten snitty when she'd learned Jack didn't share her dream about becoming a geophysical engineering consultant, and then gotten petty when she'd thought about what it would be like to support a man for ten years or more while he worked his way through a degree program. It wasn't as if she was used to some life of comfort she'd have to give up. She might go a little crazy working as a clerical somewhere, but even that would be better than losing Jack.

Jack looked as depressed as she felt. “Don't worry about it, Sara. It's just a dream, not something that could ever come true."

She might give up on herself but she hadn't given up on Jack. “That's the most negative thing I've heard anybody say. If it's what you want, you've got to go for it."

"I have to keep moving. If I settle down in one place, they'll catch me faster."

All of a sudden the idea of student Jack, sitting in her bed surrounded by books sounded a lot more interesting. Pushing a few books off the bed and climbing into the bed herself would be a lot better than sleeping alone every night.

"Maybe the angels are going to leave you alone. It isn't like you're hurting anyone."

Jack gave a rueful smile. “If they catch me, they'll hunt me. They don't stop to ask what you've been up to."

* * * *

Katra watched her two friends circle around each other like clumsy grunion uncertain how to handle the mating ritual. “You guys are being ridiculous. You know that, don't you?"

"But—” Sara and Jack both started at the same moment.

"First of all, you fight about stupid things. How are you going to feel about your Miata if Jack gets chased away by an angel?"

Sara hung her head. “Uh, I'm just a little sensitive about—"

"Yeah, I know how that is.” She turned to Jack. “And you, you say you've got to keep moving. Well maybe there's another answer. Maybe there's some way you could disguise yourself and disappear from the angels’ radar scope."

Jack cocked his head. “I would say that's impossible but it's obvious that you know something and are just dying to get it out."

"I know it isn't impossible. Because Derrick has done it to you. If a loser like Derrick can do it, why shouldn't you?"

"But we don't know how Derrick manages to disappear,” Sara argued. “Besides, Jack is a demon, not an angel."

Katra shook her head. “Same basic powers. Right, Jack?"

"Angels can draw on powers from above. That sustains them and—"

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