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Authors: Dahlia Rose

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“Not with me, never be scared of me or of being with me, because I would cut off my own hands before I raised them to you in anger.” He held up his hands to her. “These are to cherish you and Jules, nothing else.”

Nicole laced her fingers through his. “I know, I’m getting used to that fact.”

With their fingers intertwined, Max kissed her once more. It was a slow, sweet kiss that spoke volumes.

The barrier of their clothes kept her flesh from meeting his. Max made a sound of desire as Nicole pressed her body closer. She wanted to feel more, his arms and body were rock hard and toned from his police training. She wanted to taste his skin and feel the muscles under her fingertips. He broke the kiss just long enough to pull the light blue sweater over her head. He pressed a hard kiss on her lips before he trailed his lips down her neck to the rise of her breasts. Max removed her bra with ease and she gasped as his hot mouth closed over her nipple and he lightly flicked it with his tongue. His other hand played with her breast as he made a sound of surprise. Nicole looked down to see her milk on his fingers.

“Oh God, I’m sorry, shoot, should I put my bra back on?” Nicole asked worriedly. Did it gross men out to have sex with a breastfeeding woman?

“No,” Max’s voice was almost distracted. “This is how you feed Jules, I never thought about seeing it… it’s crazy, I know you breast feed and don’t be disgusted but I think it’s hot.”

“It’s not disgusting, Karen told her me husband liked when she was breast feeding,” Nicole said hesitantly. “She said sometimes he could taste it when they… well, you know.”

Max’s eyes met hers. “So if I kiss your nipples and suck on them I’d taste…”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“Okay, definitely arousing.” His voice was soft and hoarse with desire.

He shrugged out of his shirt and brought her against his chest. Nicole gasped as her skin met his and she felt the heat of his body. This time it was she who pulled his head down to kiss him with the pure need that was pulsing through her body. He walked back slowly until she felt the bed at the back of her knees. Max lifted her like she weighed nothing and placed her on the bed.

“I want to be naked so you can touch me everywhere,” she panted.

“Damn, if you keep saying things like that I won’t be able to hold back from taking you hard,” he said.

He was on his side leaning over her body kissing her ravenously and trailing heat wherever he touched. He closed his mouth over her nipples once more and sucked hard. She gave a small cry of pleasure and felt her breast release a stream of milk into his mouth. His groan was primal and she felt his hips move reflexively against her. He turned his attention to her second breast and gave it the same loving attention as the first until she was writhing on the bed. Max sat up on the bed and looked at her with dark desire in his eyes. He held her gaze as he ran his hand down the inside of her legs and rubbed her pussy through the fabric of her tights. Her hips arched toward his fingers and she whimpered, wanting to feel more.

“I want to be naked so you can touch me there,” she gasped.

“Touch you where, tell me what you want me to do,” he said gutturally.

“I want to feel your mouth and hands on my pussy,” Nicole said.
Did I really just say that?
she wondered, and the words made her excited all the more as her inhibitions began to slowly slip away.

“Oh honey, I’d be glad to,” Max replied.

He gave a soft growl in the back of his throat, one that made her tremble. He got to his knees and stripped her tights and panties off before settling between her legs. She felt his breath on her mound and lifted her hips in invitation. He started with one slow lick between the folds of her vulva before he spread the lips of her pussy and sucked on her clit. Nicole cried out and clenched her hands in the thick bedspread beneath her. Sheer pleasure coursed through her and the primal sounds that Max made only fueled her need. He brought her to the brink of sweet release and let her slip over the edge of something magical that she’d never felt before.

“Oh God, what happened?” she said gasping for breath. “I think I’m light-headed.”

“You’ve never had an orgasm before?” Max asked. amazed.

Nicole felt suddenly embarrassed and shook her head.

“Then I’m honored that it happened just for me.” He kissed her until she was breathless once more before announcing. “I’m going to make you come for me again and again.”

“Then take the rest of your clothes off and show me everything,” Nicole said wantonly. If he could make her feel like that with his mouth, she wanted to experience it all.

He took the rest of his clothes off and came back to her on the bed. “If you want me to stop, honey, you’re in control of this all the way.”

“Then make me come again like you promised,” Nicole demanded.

“Your wish is my pleasure to fulfill,” he said huskily and nipped at her lips. “I’ve gone past wanting you, this is pure need.”

Nicole stroked his shoulders. “Show me how much.”

The next kiss seared him into her senses and she felt the last of her reservations fall away. He used his hands to tease her body until she hungered for him even more. Nicole whimpered against his lips when she felt his hand delve between her legs. He cupped the mound of her pussy and using his finger stroked and teased between the wet slit before penetrating her with a lone digit.

“Sit up just a bit, I want you to see me touching you,” Max ordered softly. “You feel so good clenching around my fingers.”

He stacked pillows behind her so she could see his hand between her legs. Nicole watched him rub her clit and bit her lip as he slipped his finger inside her once more.

“Oh, Max,” she moaned.

“Do you like how this feels?” he asked.

“Yes…. please,” she panted.

“Please what, do you want more?” Max said huskily against her ear. “Tell me you want me.”

“Max I want you, make me come again,” Nicole pleaded.

“Yes honey, I certainly will,” Max answered. “I’m yours, to please you and to love you.”

Nicole was drawn to the blue gaze of his eyes. She belonged to him completely and knowing he felt the same reinforced that he was the man for her. “Oh yes,” she cried out as he buried a second finger deep inside her. He drove her crazy taking her to the peak of pleasure then slowing it down and slowly stoking the fire again.

“I want you to come all over my hand.” Desire was evident in his voice as he spoke.

“Yes, oh yes,” she panted and her hips followed the rhythm of his hands.

His cock was hard as steel and pressed against spread legs. Max placed her hand on his length and she stroked him, imitating his movements with her own hand. Nicole hoped to give him as much pleasure as he was giving her. He said her name almost reverently and groaned low in his throat. He picked up the pace of his two fingers, sliding them deeper, faster, until her head fell back and ecstasy coursed through her. She could feel the orgasm building inside her and it was almost unbearable. Nicole wasn’t able to hold back and a cry escaped her lips. She dug her fingers into the soft bedspread beneath her to anchor herself as she rode out her release with wild abandon. All the while she stroked his cock in a frantic pace until he pulled away and his harsh breathing could be heard.

“I need to have you now,” Max said roughly.

“No, my turn,” Nicole said trying to catch her breath. “Show me how to please you. I want to taste you.”

“You don’t have to do that, Nicole,” he answered.

She pushed him back and knelt between his legs. “I want to and I don’t want to hold back, not anymore.”

“Oh fuck, Nicole.”

He said the words as she took the hard length of him in her hand and stroked. This time it was her turn to watch. The thick cords of his neck tensed as he arched his head at her touch. A long, low moan escaped his lips at her ministrations. She bent her head and tentatively licked the tip of his cock, then slowly ran her tongue down the erect shaft. She took his length as deep as she could into her mouth. She sucked and swirled her tongue around the tip, tasting his essence.

Nicole lifted her head. “I like your taste, I want you.”

“Show me how much you want me,” he groaned.

Nicole went back to laving his cock with her mouth. She got bolder and more excited at his taste, feeling her pussy clench in anticipation of knowing he would be inside her soon.

He pushed her away suddenly and pulled her up over his body and devoured her lips in a kiss. Nicole wanted him more than she thought possible. She was wanton with desire and initiated the final act of their coupling. She moved off his body to get on her hands and knees. Max moved behind her and she could feel his erection against her pussy, causing her to wiggle in anticipation. Nicole moaned in excitement when Max ran the tip of his cock up and down her slit. With one smooth thrust he filled her and she cried out his name.

“Oh damn, damn you feel so good,” he said harshly.

There was no more teasing to enhance the buildup of pleasure. He pumped into her at a feverish pace that made her feel heat all across her skin and the sensations crashed over her in waves. Max pulled her up so she was on her knees while he was behind her and cupped her breasts while he fucked her.

She’d never been taken like this, so primal and hot all at the same time. Nicole cried out his name and he echoed with hers. The pleasure he was creating built up to a point where she could no longer contain it and took her over the edge. She came hard and practically screamed. But it didn’t end there, the aching need continued, one after the other until it blended into a haze of ecstasy.

“Honey, I’m going to come,” he groaned.

“Let go, Max, oh I’ve never felt anything like this.” She felt his cock thicken and throb inside her.

“Nicole!” With a loud, harsh cry, he grabbed her hips and pumped into her mercilessly.

She felt his seed fill her with each thrust until nothing was left and they both slumped into the bed weakly after the storm of passion ended. Nicole was surprised at her own desire and everything he made her feel.

“You’re so quiet, did I scare you? Aw hell, I hurt you didn’t I?” Max rolled to face her. “I’m sorry, honey I’m a beast and you should punch me and hell I’ll go sleep on the couch.”

Nicole put her hand over his mouth to stem the flow of words. “Maxwell Kincaid I’m fine, I’m more than that, I feel amazing. I loved every minute of being with you. I felt cherished, sexy and beautiful.”

“You are more than that to me, you’re my every fantasy and dream rolled into one,” Max said huskily. “This bed has been empty, waiting for you. You don’t understand how you changed my world that night I met you.”

Nicole felt tears mist in her eyes and she gave him a watery smile. “I wasn’t looking my best, I was sweaty, in pain, scared, and my hair was all over the place.”

Max shook head slowly. “I saw a woman who did what she had to do for her and her baby, I saw strength beneath all that fear. I saw someone that I fell in love with.”

Nicole gasped. “Maxwell you do not have to say that!”

He grinned. “You call me Maxwell when you’re surprised or mad. I mean it, Nicole, I love you and for me to say this is no joke. I’ve never been in love but when it hits it’s like a sucker punch to the chest, in a good way.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Nicole stammered. “I wish I could say it back to you but I don’t know.”

“Are you happy with me?” Max asked. “Do you want to be anywhere else right now?”

“No, never. I know I’m meant to be here with you,” Nicole said with certainty.

“That’s all I need right now,” he said firmly. “Just know that I love you, I love your son, and that’s not going to change.”

Nicole pulled him close and wrapped her arms around his naked back. She was so stunned by his admission that her mind was reeling. Her tough cop was in love with her. She felt the thrill of joy shoot through her, but she couldn’t say I love you, not right now. She had to think because the last time she gave herself over in a relationship it was the wrong choice. Max wasn’t like Derek, she was sure of that, but still she had to be careful. Even though everything inside her was dancing in happiness.

Chapter Five

When the news came that she needed to give her testimony to the grand jury, Nicole wasn’t surprised. But Max was furious. He saw her eyes, even though she said she was fine Nicole was scared. It bothered the hell out of him. The prosecuting ADA needed her to testify so they could up his indictment and ask for more time in jail when he was found guilty. Max looked at Derek’s record, and this was his third strike. He’d be going to prison for twenty plus years. A month of her staying at his apartment had just brought them closer, and even though he affirmed his love for her every day she never said it in return.

It didn’t bother him because when he held her, kissed her, or just held her hand, he felt her love. She just had to be in a place where she felt secure enough to say it back. Following Karen’s hints from their first conversation, Max was giving her space to do things in her own time without pressure. But going to court was not going to be something she would do alone. Max was not giving Derek the chance to threaten Nicole in any way. Men like him used fear to make witnesses change their testimony. Max wanted Derek to see him as a very big and deadly buffer in front of Nicole, one that would do anything to protect her.

Jackie was watching Jules, much to her delight. He caught the way his best friend’s wife was looking at the baby and then looked at Jones. Jones’s face softened and when the couple’s eyes met, he had no doubt that there would be another family member sooner rather than later. He wondered how it would be to be a father and watch a child growing inside the woman he loved, Nicole. That was a ways off, he knew, but a nice dream nonetheless. He never even considered he’d be in a relationship let alone thinking about being a dad. But right now Nicole sat between them both, waiting to be called into the grand jury room as she tapped her foot nervously. He wanted to hold her hand and usher her home but Max knew she needed to do this and it had to be on her own terms and two feet.

The court officer came out the door and called her name. “Ms. Henry, they’re ready for you.”

Just as she stood, Derek Grove walked up with a slimy looking man wearing a tailored suit and one could only assume this was his lawyer. Max stood next to her instantly.

“Hey Nicole, looking good,” Derek sneered.

“Wrong move trying to intimidate a witness,” Max snarled.

His lawyer stepped forward. “My client has the right to be here.”

Max looked at him with disdain. “Yeah, you’re the type to represent scum like this.”

Derek grinned. “Don’t worry, when this is all over we’ll get together and raise my boy right.”

“You’ll never get your hands on him,” Nicole raised her head. “I’m not scared of you.”

Derek stoked his goatee. “You got cop protection, huh? I remember when you were just a tiny little mouse in my world.”

“You’re world is about to collapse in on you,” Nicole gave him a cold smile. “The thing about mice is that they’re hardly ever seen, which makes it easy to get the cheese. I’ve been collecting info on you for a long time and I gave it all to them. Oh, and this cop isn’t my protection detail, he’s my boyfriend. You should be the one who’s scared.”

She turned and walked into the room where the court officer waited. She went through the door without a second glance in Derek’s direction.
Good for you
, Max thought with a grin spread over his face. Jones was a little less subtle and laughed out loud before muttering, “Loser.” Derek was infuriated, Max could see it on the criminal’s face. His lawyer went ahead and as Derek turned to leave Max accidentally bumped into him.

He rested his hand on Derek’s shoulder before muttering against his ear, “You contact her again, you sneeze in prison and it sounds like her name, you’ll be dealing with me.” Max made sure Derek could see his eyes and know he was serious. “You’re never terrorizing her again.”

“Are you threatening my client?” His lawyer turned and snapped.

Max never took his cold gaze from Derek’s face as patted the man’s shoulder. “No, he almost tripped. I was helping him up.”

Jones shook his head in pity. “He seems a bit clumsy, lucky my partner here stopped him from breaking his face on the tile.”

Derek went pale under his expensive spray-on tan and moved quickly away. It was the reaction Max wanted. He wanted the slimy fuckhead to know he wasn’t just dealing with a woman who was smaller and weaker than him. A bully needed to know someone bigger would take up the charge. Nicole was in the room for over an hour and when she came out she looked tired, and yet Max could see she was happy.

ADA Hopewell came out minutes later and said they had the indictment. The incident that caused him to get bail was a shadow compared to the charges he was going to be facing. Hopewell had no doubt that Derek and his attorney would deal to bring down his sentence, even so, he was going to prison for twenty years or more. That was another round of great news, but she still looked like she been wrung through the wash and hung out damp. He almost hesitated to take her to the second place he’d had planned. But he was sure this was the right time, so when they parted ways with Jones he turned his car toward uptown. He parked in front of a sleek office building and Nicole looked at him with a question in her eyes.

“Why are we here?” Nicole asked.

He got out, opened her car door, and held out his hand to her. “Trust me, please?”

Nicole put her hand in his and nodded. “I do trust you.”

“Good.” He closed the door to the SUV and turned on the alarm.

Hand in hand they walked into the building and rode the elevator up to the ninth floor. They stopped in front of an office door that read Dr. Justine Fordham, Therapist. Max could see the question in her eyes but she said nothing as they walked inside.

“Hi, I’m Maxwell Kincaid and this is Nicole Henry. We have an appointment,” he said.

The receptionist smiled. “She’s expecting you, please have a seat and I’ll let her know you’re here.”

They sat and Max saw Nicole clench her hands in her lap. This time he took both her hands in his and said gently, “Everything will be okay.”

She gave a nod and began to speak but the receptionist ushered them in. Behind a desk sat an older woman with a friendly smile. She came around to greet them and shook both of their hands warmly.

“Nice to meet you both. Before we start I want you to be comfortable here, so call me Justine,” she said warmly. “Is this Nicole I’ve heard so much about?”

Nicole nodded. “You have me at a disadvantage, I don’t know you or what’s going on.”

“I’ll let Max explain,” Justine said.

They sat on the leather sofa that faced a single high back chair where the therapist patiently waited.

Max took a breath and turned to Nicole. “I set up the appointment with Justine a few weeks ago when we started seeing each other. I’ve been talking to her about you and me, and the relationship I wanted with you. I’m rough around the edges, not just rough but bumpy, and I wanted to make sure I approached you the right way. I wasn’t going to take a chance that I could scare you or hurt you even more.”

“You’ve been thinking about me and my feelings all this time?” Nicole asked softly.

Max nodded. “I’m not overly proud to admit that I’ve been hard for too damn long. There’s not a lot to me, foster kid, I don’t know who my parents are, my first real memory is of being in a foster home. I was hustling pool at eighteen and luckily I got on the right side of the law. But when I met you I saw possibilities that I never thought I’d have. Karen talked with me and I knew that for us to move together as a couple we had to face your abuse together. You walked alone for so long, honey, I didn’t want you to face this step alone. I won’t talk if you don’t want me to, but I’m here to be your support. I’m going to catch you if you fall and we’re going to deal with this together. For our sakes and Jules.”

He watched two tears slip down her cheeks and wondered if he made the right choice. Was it too soon to ask her to face the things that haunted her nightmares?

“How does that make you feel, Nicole hearing him say this to you?” Justine asked gently. She reached forward and offered Nicole a tissue from a box close by.

“I’ve never had anyone be there for me like this.” Nicole wiped her eyes. “He keeps saying he’s this street kid that is so rough and tumble. But I see the most amazing man I’ve ever met.” She linked her fingers with his, and Max’s heart ached with the intensity of his love for her. “He’s my tough cop.”

“And she’s my tough lady.” Max kissed the back of her hand.

“Then let’s begin,” Justine encouraged. “Tell me about everything.”

Nicole closed her eyes as if to center herself. “The first time he hit me, he apologized and cried.”

“Who is he, Nicole? Give him a face and a name so he’s not that unknown shadow that can haunt your dreams. Take that power away from him as well,” Justine encouraged.

“Derek, he hit me, he abused me for almost two years,” Nicole said. “I figured he was stressed or the club didn’t make a lot of money but I forgave him. I continued to forgive him when each beating became worse until I couldn’t even make excuses to myself anymore.”

Max listened to her story and at times he wanted to break things, preferably over Derek’s head. But he let her get it all out and held her as she cried. As a man who learned to read hostage takers and profile the criminal element, Max was the one who had to assess his own feelings and talk them over with someone who was there to listen, not to judge. By the end of the session, it felt as if he and Nicole were on another plateau of their relationship, this one built on a solid foundation. They picked up Jules from Jones and Jackie’s house before heading to his apartment.

Later that night, Nicole was in the kitchen getting dessert for them while he was on the sofa with Jules. He had the baby on the changing mat and a cloth diaper off his boy bits. His shirt was a bit damp where Jules had expressed his disapproval of being unclothed. Who knew that air on little baby boy parts made him upset? He sprayed Max like a water hose as soon as his diaper was off. Max was still getting accustomed to changing diapers and wasn’t quick enough to avoid the stream. Now, like a hazmat crew, he was in the midst of clean up. Jules was smiling now, well kind of, Max didn’t know if it was a smile or, like Jones said, gas. Either way the kid was cute as hell and waved his chubby arms and legs in the air as Max tried to change him.

“Okay big man, let’s get a diaper on you, no more peeing on me, your dad doesn’t swing like that.” Max stopped when he heard his own words.

Hell, he was a dad to Jules and it felt great. Nicole walked out with two plates of pie. She’d figured out his secret weakness and fed it willingly. He would have to hit the gym more frequently because of her baking.

“Why are you grinning?” she asked and sat on the other side of the sofa by Jules’s head. She laughed. “He got you again, didn’t he?”

“At least it wasn’t in the face this time,” Max answered.

“Need any help?” Nicole asked.

“Nope, I got it.” He put the diaper on and dusted baby powder on Jules’s butt before closing up the Velcro clasps. He fastened the clips on the footie pajamas and whipped off his shirt before he lifted the little man.

“Do you need me to grab you a shirt?” Nicole asked with a smile pulling at the corners of her lips.

“Why, does my naked chest bother you?” he teased.

“It makes me think of naughty things but I can deal with it,” she replied. “Now what were you grinning at?”

“Gimme pie first,” Max demanded.

Nicole shook her head in mock disapproval. “Don’t be greedy and say please.”

“Please can I have my pie? You’ll have to feed it to me, I’m holding the baby,” Max said pitifully.

Nicole rolled her eyes and cut a piece of the dessert with ice cream and popped it in his mouth. “Now tell me why you were grinning or I go downstairs and give it to your night doorman.”

Max narrowed his eyes. “You wouldn’t dare give him my pie.”

She imitated his voice. “Yes I would, the entire thing in the kitchen on the counter.”

His free hand that wasn’t cradling Jules went over his chest. “My poor heart just broke.”

“Your heart is on the left side,” she pointed out.

“I was grinning because…. I … well I felt like Jules’s dad when I was changing him,” Max explained. “I always do when I feed him or hold him. Am I crazy?”

Nicole leaned forward and kissed him. “I’m sure he feels like your son.”

“Would you mind that, if he called me dad and I wanted him to be my son?” Max asked hesitantly.

“I would be honored and there is no other man in the word I’d want to be a father to Jules,” she said gently. “We already feel like a family.”

Max called her over with a finger on his free hand. When she leaned forward he kissed her gently. “That’s because we are, feed me more pie, and Jules stop eating your sleeve, buddy.”

Nicole laughed and cut him another piece of his favorite dessert. Max knew that there was nothing better in the world than this. He always saw what Jones had with his family and now understood why his partner hurried home each night. To a family where there was laughter and tears, joy and sorrow, but it was all shared together. Much later, when Jules was in his bassinette in the guest bedroom, they looked down at him sleeping.

“I think we should move in together,” Nicole said suddenly.

“Really?” Max hid his smile and turned, pulling her into his arms and linking his hands loosely around her waist.

She nodded. “Your job is in the city and I can’t see you joining the SIPD. Plus, you’ll be tired having to come to Staten Island. There’s also the fact that when people love each other and are raising a son they should live together.”

“Well, I guess we can change the second bedroom into his room…. whoa, you said people who love each other?” Max said.

Nicole smiled wide. “You caught that did you? Plus, we may want to get married in the future.”

“I can get a license tomorrow,” Max interrupted her.

“Hold on, let’s get accustomed to living together and parenting first, you may decide you hate it,” she answered.

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