Other Places 1: Shortcuts (8 page)

"Oops. It's just carrying the weight. I mean physically. He's heavier than I am." Which, he realized, probably didn't mean anything to these people. Some of the others in the place were trying to crowd into the back with them, only to have Nikki make shewing gestures at them.

"Back, back you throng of undead." There was a playful grin with the words which got at least some of the people to smile as well. "And don't go telling everyone about this. Secret stuff here."

That was something he hadn't considered. Why would the dead man be a secret? From the cops, but he got the feeling that most of these folks weren't exactly going to be calling this in. If for no other reason that they probably wouldn't have been believed if they had.

"Well, there you go. All safe and sound." Still dead too, but that wasn't his problem. On his way out he nodded to Edom and then called back to Nikki, trying to make his voice light, and still sound reasonably serious about the matter. "Remember to put in that request for funds."

Then he left, the world outside the warm mall freezing. The snow had mainly melted off, but there were a few white drifts at the edges of the parking lot. Also clouds in the sky. Zack hurried home, being careful to watch for police detectives, as well as Vampires, since both seemed to be equally dangerous anymore. For the moment the police actually seemed the greater problem, since no Vampires had trashed his shop at all yet. Nothing showed up at least, so he was back home about two minutes later, the cold making him faster than normal.

It was Wednesday, which meant that Troy was home, a bag of Taco Bell sitting next to him on the sofa, which he moved off to the side, grinning.

"Just in time. I have some food with your name on it. The girl I met last night, her sister works at Taco Bell and is about to quit, so she gave away about three hundred dollars of food first. I got loads of it. There's more in the fridge. Beats Ramen." He seemed pretty happy about it, which got Zack to smile too, since Troy deserved to have good things happen to him.

"That's incredible. I mean, she must really hate her job, to do that. I hope she doesn't get in trouble." Not that he wouldn't eat the food. Even with the Chinese earlier he was still hungry. That was probably going to be happening for a while, a kind of rebound from not having enough for as long as had happened.

The rest of the evening was spent listening to the radio and eating tacos and chalupas. They were all good, but given everything he would have happily eaten dog biscuits at the moment. He loaded everything with hot sauce, enjoying the light burn it caused. Troy kept staring at each bite as if he was insane. Instead of the regular conversation they used to have about spicy foods his friend actually asked about his day at work.

"It was fine, but pretty slow. Well, until about seven or so. Then this hot Vampire girl came to the back door with a dead body. She was being chased by this policeman. A Detective Baconni. Which I
just
got. Baconni... Like bacon. Policeman Bacon. Funny. Anyway she had this body with her, which is supposed to wake up later, but, you know, no pulse, right? So she asked me to hide it. It was kind of strange. I guess you had to be there."

Troy munched his food carefully and nodded along, listening, but not really paying much attention to what he was saying. After a while he looked up and took the last bite of what he was eating.

"So, anyway, Cindy was saying that she has this friend, she's not very hot, but she has a really nice personality, I'm supposed to ask if you want to go out with her? I said I'd ask, but it's alright if you don't want to. I mean, anyone that get's flat out described as not very good looking... Well, that might not be the best thing in the world. Plus, I did mention that whole thing where you're insane. I don't think she believed me."

That could be a problem then. Most girls weren't all that into crazy guys. Not the "I hear voices and see dead people" kind at least. They wanted a little wild and assertive, not someone that has a foul mouthed mirror image.

"I'll pass. No judgment on her friend, who's probably better than I deserve. Unless she just wants to have disappointing sex a few times? Then I'm all in for it. I mean, who doesn't like that?"

Troy shook his head.

"I'll just let her know you're too busy for now, how's that? No need to burn bridges and all that. You really have been putting in the hours at work, I've barely seen you the last couple of days. We need money, but there's no need for you to burn yourself out."

The concern was real enough, so Zack nodded, even as Mirror Him started pretending to play a tiny violin.

"Poor Zack. He's so crazy he makes up stories about Vampires and bodies. Did it ever occur to you Zack that
you
might be the sane one? Not being willing to see reality as it actually is, well, that's not exactly normal, is it? OK... It
is
, but you know what I mean."

There was sense to the idea. It was also the kind of thing that nut jobs like him were told by the voices in their heads. To his relief the topic changed then, moving to the related topic of Troy's workplace. It seemed that Kevin the bouncer was sleeping with one of the other bartenders, an attractive woman named Barb and the manager, Edom, was
not
pleased by that at all.

"We're not supposed to fraternize like that, I guess. Too bad, because I'd love to bang Barb. Well, if she doesn't get fired
you'll
just have to take a crack at her."

Zack tilted his head for a second, wondering if there was any way in the world there could be two Edom's in one town.

"Edom... Good looking black guy, not overly tall, looks about thirty, drives a cream colored sports car?"

His roommate looked extremely puzzled then.

"That's him. Good guy as long as you don't break his rules. Harder on some of the people than the others. He likes me I guess. Then, I just work and don't do more than occasionally take a lady home with me. No sex in the bathrooms or anything. Till always works out at the end of the night, I don't come in drunk. Honestly... I
just
realized; I'm the perfect employee." He nodded, pretending to be self-satisfied for a few moments, then he chuckled. "Anyway, you know him? I wouldn't have thought your paths would connect like that. Did you meet him when you came to the club?"

Zack didn't really know how to respond, since Edom wouldn't really be working at Yoghurt World, not if it was a real place and Troy wasn't going to buy the man as a Vampire yet. His buddy just wasn't ready for that. After a few seconds he just shrugged.

"He hangs out at the mall sometimes. There were some people hassling an older woman the other day when I was leaving work and he helped me get them to leave her alone. Then he called a tow truck for her and put it on his Triple A, which was awesome of him." It was the truth, as far as Zack knew, so if Troy asked about it the guy wouldn't have to lie or anything.
He
wasn't at least, which his roommate would get, on some level.

"That sounds like him. I hope I grow up to be that cool. I do think he's being a little hard on Kevin and Barb, since it's just sex and I don't think he's sleeping with either of them himself, so it isn't about being jealous."

They chatted about the club for a while, until nearly eleven, when Zack decided all good little store clerks should be in bed, especially if he was going to finish fixing the store the next day. Hopefully Lisa would make it in and he could actually do that shopping for decorations. He had the envelope on him still, and made a point of tucking it in his coat pocket, so that he wouldn't lose it. There was no way he was leaving the house without it after all. Plus it was next to his house key, which would make it twice as certain.

He got up at about eight, dragging a bit, but made it to the store with plenty of time to spare just by walking a little faster than he normally did. He didn't look to see if Lenore was in yet, figuring that she would be. Instead Zack just got to work making a display table out of some nice red silk and some boxes that he taped together. He set a piece of white silk on the top as a place holder for the real display, which he'd make later and then some candles to hold it down, just as the Vampire girl came in, holding a flat container that seemed to be frozen yoghurt on a honey bun.

"A morning treat for you." She smiled, letting her teeth show, which he took to mean she was feeling comfortable with him, rather than aggressive. The fact she was handing him food while he was hungry didn't hurt either.

Zack took it with a smile and nodded a bit.

"OK, I'll go out with you. I warn you though, I'm
totally
crazy. I mean, I hear voices and stuff. On the
good
side the voices like you." There was a pause while he scooped just a little bit of the white frozen goodness up with a bit of bun. "Or, to be more honest, he thinks that you're hot, but that you might be trying to fatten me up. You know, for food. Just to clarify, dating yes, munching no." It came out happy sounding and got the woman to cover her mouth and giggle a little.

"Oh? How serious are you about all that?" She leaned in a little, the scent of her hitting him like a gentle breeze. Flowers and something like vanilla.

"Totally. Even about the voices. I don't lie. He does, my mirror self. So, did you come to see the damage that Nikki brought to my door? It really wasn't her fault, but I can't exactly bill the local police department for it, so you get stuck with it. Did she mention that at all?"

There was a slow blink, as if she couldn't really track the conversation for some reason. Possibly like it was just too stupid to deal with at the moment. Then, she wasn't the one that had to explain the damage to Lisa, was she? Having cash in hand for it would make him look a lot less inept.

"She... did mention that. I haven't looked at the invoice yet. Still, I'm sure that you'll deal with us fairly. I'm not wild about Nikki at the moment. She's not a horrible person, but she's a little too gentle for the position she holds. You can't coddle the young. Not Vampire young. This problem with the human detective shouldn't never have happened, which is another sign she isn't ready for her job. Would you like us to kill him? It's been discussed anyway, so that wouldn't be a problem. I can expedite the paperwork on it, if you have a complaint too. That would make it a diplomatic issue after all."

He took another bite of the roll which was a little hard where it had been in contact with the frozen part of the dish. There was a cinnamon caramel drizzle on it, but no whipped topping, since obviously, it was too early in the day for that. After a few seconds he shook his head and sighed.

"No, thanks. I let her in and helped hide the body so that she wouldn't have to kill anyone to cover it up. I have to admit that Baconni wasn't exactly
grateful
about it all, but he still doesn't deserve to die over it. Not yet. Nikki should at least try to get that settled first, you know? Maybe take him to dinner and try explaining again. Sleep with him until he forgets the other stuff... He won't get it, not really, but if he thinks she's insane enough, he'll probably let it all go. I know that almost always works for me."

Lenore smiled again and asked how he liked the new dish.

"It's pretty good. Not up to the standards of the things from the other day somehow..." He realized that he was being rude, but the girl gestured at it with a dismissive air.

"I'm trying out prepackaged baked goods. They don't smell as fresh, but I wasn't certain if humans could tell the difference or not. Back to the drawing board on that one then. I'll see if I can find a bakery that delivers or something. Not that we need that much, since most days I don't have any customers in the early part of the day. Still, the busy season is here, so I want to be ready. I see that you're doing the same, which I can't help but like. No one comes down to this end of the mall without a reason. Most of the shops are on the upper level or the other side."

Then without moving at all, her face became very sly. It was a subtle thing, but one that he couldn't help but miss. It was a powerful enough thing that he stopped with the long handled plastic spoon in his mouth.

"So... Edom mentioned that you... took Mr. Jameson through the node here and then picked him back up from ours when it was safe? That's impressive. Very much so. What do you normally charge for such services?"

That was strange enough that Zack nearly laughed, but after a few seconds he shrugged, holding his face still.

"What do you normally
pay
for such things?" When in doubt, toss the question back. His grandfather had taught him that.

The woman twisted her hair and took a deeper breath than normal, as if trying to buy time.

"For something like this? Normally we wouldn't have bargained for it at all. Nikki didn't even realize what you'd done at first, even after you went back through the node to get her package. At least she didn't understand what it might be worth. Edom has more experience however, and informed her what it really means. How much debt she incurred. It's done now though. I suggest we barter, if possible, since passing around great sums of cash can draw attention."

Mirror Him chortled from a ways away, in the glass of the front counter. The inside of that needed a display too. It had a false back to it, but it was kind of boring looking. Just white and silver.

"I know, tell her that she can do you in the back room. Vampires can get it on, right?"