Our Love (34 page)
And I plan on doing it right now,
I thought as I drove toward Derrick's house.
Michael
What just happened her
e? I thought as I watched Ashley take Charlie away. One minute Danielle and I were walking through the mall, talking and laughing like old friends, and the next, Charlie was standing in front of me with a hateful look on her face. The way she looked at me made me think that she still had feelings for me. She might have been a little jealous of the fact that I was with Danielle. Danielle came up to me and wrapped her arms around me. I pushed myself from Danielle.
"What's wrong?"
"Just leave me alone," I said as I started to walk off.
Danielle started to follow me as I went towards the exit.
When Danielle finally caught up with me, I was halfway to my car. I really didn't want to deal with Danielle after what she pulled.
"Will you stop walking for a second?" Danielle yelled.
I stopped and turned around.
"What Danielle."
"Why are you so upset with me? Charlie got exactly what she deserved."
"What the hell were you trying to pull in there? You know we're not together."
"I know, but she doesn't. Mike, don't feel like you've done anything wrong because Charlie saw us together. Charlie made her choice and she moved on."
I shook my head and sighed.
"You're not getting it Danielle! You act like this is a game, but it's not."
"I never said this was a game. I'm not in competition to win over your heart."
"Well it sure seems like you are."
Danielle looked at me with an angry look on her face.
"If you want to continue sulking over that slut then that's fine with me," she said as she went over to her car. She turned around and looked at me.
"I don't understand you Mike. You have such a good thing going for yourself, including me. Why would you want to risk that by being with a girl who doesn't care about you?"
"You're a fine person to talk Danielle, considering the fact that you did the same thing Charlie has done. How are you going to stand there and act righteous after you cheated on me?"
"I guess because of the fact that I still love you."
"Did you think about that while you were cheating on me?"
Danielle sighed as she got into her car and slammed the door. As she pulled off, I looked at her and smiled.
"I take that as a no," I said.
As I went over to my car, the thought of Charlie looking at me made my heart ache. I know what Danielle said to me was true, but my feelings for Charlie were extremely different than my feelings for Danielle. Danielle and I had gone on different paths in our lives and to be honest, I didn't want to go back down that road with her. Maybe what Charlie said was true about her feelings and her confusion over Derrick and me. Even though Charlie said she loved me, I can't have half her heart. I want her whole heart. And until she realizes what she really wants, I can't be with her.
Charlie
Driving to Derrick's house felt like an eternity. As I pulled up into the driveway, I noticed Derrick's car was the only one parked.
Good,
I thought as I got out of the car. As I started to push the doorbell, I quickly put my finger down. I suddenly became nervous and sweaty. As I wiped the sweat from my hands onto my jeans, I looked around the neighborhood with an unsatisfied feeling. Maybe what I'm about to do is not the best idea.
But if Michael can move on, so can I.
I shook my head of all my thoughts of Michael as I rang the doorbell.
"I can't turn back now," I said as I waited for Derrick to answer the door.
The door opened to reveal Derrick wearing a white tank and blue basketball shorts. I started to breathe heavily as I looked at Derrick and his strong, muscled arms. Although I didn't know where my heart was, I definitely knew where the other parts of me were.
"I see your parents' cars are not here. Are they at home?"
"No. They are both still at work," Derrick said in a strange voice.
I walked in and closed the door behind me. I went up to Derrick and threw him with all my strength against the door. Derrick looked at me with a shocked look on his face.
"Char, what has gotten into you?"
I put my finger to Derrick's lips and smiled.
"Don't say anything," I said as I pulled off his shirt. I looked at his chest in amazement.
"I want you. Right here, right now," I said as I started to kiss Derrick's neck.
Derrick looked at me as I moved my lips from his neck to his ear. He closed his eyes as I began to nibble on his ear. I knew that Derrick's ear was one of his spots. As I pulled away from Derrick, he grabbed my waist and pulled me over to the couch. We started to kiss passionately as we fell on the couch. As we were pulling each other's clothes off, my mind started to race a hundred miles a minute. What was I doing? The only person I slept with was Michael. I thought he was the only person I would be with. As Derrick lay me down on the couch, he looked at me with a sparkle in his eyes.
"You sure you want to do this? We can wait if you want."
I looked at Derrick as I put my arms around him. I knew I should say yes we should wait, but something inside of me wanted to tell him no. I wanted to feel his arms around me, his lips touching all over my body.
"I've never been surer of anything in my life." I saidDerrick smiled as he caressed my cheek.
"Wait right here. I'll be back," he said as he got up from the couch. As he ran upstairs, my mind started to wander to the night Michael and I first made love. The closeness we felt as our bodies entwined with each other. That night we became one, and that feeling would never be duplicated if Derrick and I made love.
"Charlie. Charlie," Derrick said.
My mind went crashing back to reality as I looked at Derrick with a spacy look on my face.
"What?"
"You sure you okay? You seem pretty out of it."
I smiled as I took Derrick's hand. "I'm fine. I guess I'm just kind of nervous about us taking this step. You know things won't be the same between us if we do this."
Derrick smiled. "I know, but we're in love Char. This will be something that we can both embrace together."
I looked at Derrick and nodded my head.
"I agree."
"Are you comfortable on the couch? If not, we can go upstairs," Derrick said in a concerned voice.
"I'm fine."
Derrick gave me a sexy stare as he leaned in toward me. As he started to kiss me, an image of Michael came into my mind. All of a sudden, I wasn't in Derrick's living room anymore. I was in Michael's loft, on his couch kissing him. The thought of being with Michael only made me want to be with him more. As I started to get more excited by the thought of being with Michael, I forgot that I wasn't with him. I was with Derrick. I didn't know how much more I could take. I was about to do something I would regret.
"I can't do this," I said as I sat up on the couch. Derrick looked at me with a surprised expression on his face.
"What's going on Charlie? You come into my house saying you want me, and now you're saying you don't. Why are you playing games with me?"
"I'm not playing games with you. I just realized what I'm doing and I can't go through with it," I said while putting on my clothes.
"You realized what you were doing? Are you saying that you're using me on the rebound?"
"No. It not like that. I was just in an awkward situation and I needed you for comfort."
"So you were using me?"
"No, I wasn't."
"Then what else is it Charlie?"
I looked at Derrick with tears coming down my eyes. I didn't know how much more crying I could take. I felt like my tear ducts were dried out. I didn't know how much more heartache I could take either.
"Derrick, if you'd just listen to me..."
"I think I know what's going on. You're still not over Michael, and I don't think you will ever be. I think you were confused over your feelings for me while you were with Michael and now since things are over and done between you two, you decided to use me as your backup."
"That's not it, Derrick. I told you how I felt for you."
"If you felt that way, you wouldn't be still pining over Michael!"
"How do you want me to act? I wouldn't be human if I didn't feel guilty about Michael."
"I didn't say you weren't. I'm just saying that you shouldn't feel like you owe anything to Michael. You should move on with your life and be happy."
I shook my head as I was heading toward the door. I turned around and sighed.
"You don't get it Derrick."
Derrick went to the door and opened it.
"I get it Charlie. I get it loud and clear. I think you need to leave."
I looked at Derrick and smiled.
"I should have known you'd never change," I said while walking out.
"I should have known the same about you too," he said.
Before I could say anything else, Derrick closed the door in my face.
I looked at the closed door for a second, as I tried to figure out what happened. I clear my throat, stuck out my chest, and walked away from Derrick's door with my pride intact. I didn't know what this meant for Derrick and me, but right now I didn't care. After everything that has happened with Michael, Derrick, and me, I still didn't know who my true love was. And to be honest, I didn't I need to be with anyone until I figured out what I wanted.
Two months had passed and tonight was Belmont's prom. While people were doing their final preparations for the big night, I was at home watching TV. Even though prom is supposed to be one of the biggest nights of your life, I didn't feel like partying. In fact, all I wanted to do was stay at home and watch TV. But I knew I needed to be there since I could be voted prom king. At first I was excited about going to the prom. When I was with Charlie. I imagined all the time how things would be if Charlie and I went to the prom. But now, that dream is only a dream.
After our little quarrel at the mall, Danielle and I decided to patch things up for the prom. Since then, Danielle had been calling me nonstop telling me about her dress and how we would be voted prom king and queen. At least one person is excited. My thoughts were interrupted as my cell phone started to ring. I picked up the phone to see Chris's name going on and off on the Caller ID.
"Hello," I answered in a dreary tone.
"Hey man. Don't you sound excited about tonight."
"Yeah, I'm ecstatic," I said in a sarcastic tone.
"Listen, before you know it tonight will be over and done. And then there's graduation."
"I know. I can't believe we'll be graduating next week."
"Well we know who's going to be valedictorian."
I smiled through the phone. "I don't know Chris. A lot has happened these past few weeks."
"Yeah, but you maintained a 4.0 average since you started going to Belmont. You're a lock in."
"Thanks. I guess I didn't tell you I've been accepted to Northwestern."
"No way! Congrats man. When did you find out?"
"Two months ago. I guess I didn't tell you because so much has been going on."
"Wow. I'm proud of you man. Are you going?"
"I haven't decided. At first I was just applying because I wanted to see if I would be accepted. But when Charlie and I broke up, I thought maybe it would be a good idea to go."
"I think you should. It has been your dream."
"I know, but things change."
"You have some time to think about it. But as for tonight, I have to give you a heads up."
"What's up?"
"It's Charlie and Derrick. Ashley told me that they are going to the prom together."
I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Figured they would, but I thought Charlie couldn't even go to Parker's prom since what happened?"
"I think Derrick's parents pulled some strings with the principal for her to attend. Anyway, Ashley told me something that might change everything."
"I'm listening," I said as I sat up on the couch.
"She told me about the incident at the mall with Danielle all in her face, which you still never talked about..."
"Will you get to it, Chris," I said impatiently.
"Ash told me that Charlie is not over you. I don't think she ever wanted to break up with you."
I looked at the wall in total shock. That's why she looked so heartbroken at the mall. She really thought I moved on with Danielle.
"What makes Ashley think that? I heard with my own ears that she was still in love with Marberry."
"That I can't answer. That is something you have to talk to Charlie about. What I do know is that Charlie is hurt, just like you are, and I think she needed a shoulder to cry on, and Derrick was there at the right time to comfort her."
What Chris was saying could be true, but Charlie didn't deny her feelings for Derrick.
"I know what you're trying to do Chris, but Charlie told me how she felt about Derrick. Until I can hear from her how she feel for me and Derrick, then I don't see us getting back together."
"Maybe you should try to talk to her at the prom."
"I don't think that's a good place to talk to her about us."
"I think it would be the perfect place. If you want Charlie back, you've got to fight for her. If you don't, you'll lose her."
I sighed as I threw my head against the back of the couch. Chris was right. I've been miserable since Charlie and I broke up and I don't want to be with anyone else. I know Charlie is feeling the same way. She thinks that I moved on, just like I thought she did. She can't deny the feelings we felt for each other. The moments we shared. The emotions we faced while being around each other, physically and emotionally.
"You're right Chris. Charlie is the woman I want to be with. I have to fight for her. No matter how long it takes, I'm going to get her back."
"That's the Michael Collier I remember so well. When you going to do it?"
"Tonight, at the prom,"
Charlie
Prom is supposed to be the biggest night of a teenager's life. For me, it one of the nights I longed to experience. When I was a freshman, it was a dream of mine to go to the prom with my best friends and the perfect date. I would have the best time ever and be voted prom queen. Now that it was the night I'd been dreaming of, I'm not speaking to my best friend anymore, and I'm not going to the prom with the man of my dreams.
At least I'm going with my other best friend though,
I thought as I was in my room admiring the peach colored prom dress I saw at the mall two months ago. I loved the dress so much, I decided to go back to the shop and buy it. As I looked in the mirror, I had to admit that I made one stunning beauty. My long flowing hair was turned into a barrage of curls that were stacked into a beautiful coif. The hairstyle would look gorgeous with the peach strapless dress. I turned around and stared at the window. I noticed Derrick's car was parked in the driveway.