Authors: Jill Shalvis
He was both relieved and oddly disappointed when she turned off the light and left him alone.
* * *
"Candles and music didn't work! I need something else, quick!"
Michael let out a long, slow, suffering sigh and yawned loudly in the face of Hannah's hushed panic. "Hannah—"
"Give me just one more tip. Please? I came close," she said quickly before he could hang up. "So close that it should be easier this next time."
"Do I want to know this? No!"
"Please."
"Dammit. Okay." He sighed again. "The music and candles failed? Did you combine it with the skin flash and a kiss?"
"Um … not quite. Isn't there some other way?"
"Hannah, this is really awkward—"
"No, it isn't. Pretend I'm … one of the guys. Tell me about your latest conquest. Just do it quick." She didn't have much time, she was close to losing both her nerve and perspective on this whole thing.
Glaring at her closed bathroom door, she huddled on the edge of the tub and sighed. Honestly, she thought she'd had a good shot there for a moment, especially when Zach's eyes had unmistakably glazed over at the sight of her panties.
But she'd lost momentum. Probably when she'd become stupid with lust. Well, no more. She needed to stop wanting to eat him up on the spot and get down to business.
"First of all, it's the middle of the damn night," her bother told her.
As if she didn't know!
"And second of all," he continued. "It's not like I … get a 'conquest' every night of the week."
"So it's difficult for you, too. Maybe it runs in the family?"
He swore again, more colorfully now. "Listen, just tell him. Say, 'I want you'. Have you tried that?"
Well … no, actually. She hadn't.
But she would.
* * *
Zach suddenly came awake. He lay there, unsure how much time had passed or what had awakened him. Then came a rustling, the sound of a drawer opening. Blinking his still bleary eyes open into the moonlit room, he saw the slight shadow of Hannah rifling through a drawer.
It was two in the morning.
"Hannah?"
"Oh!" She nearly jerked right out of her skin. Whirling, she put a hand to her chest. "I'm sorry! Did I wake you?"
"What's the matter?"
"L-looking for sweats," she said, her teeth chattering. "I'm frozen."
She wore only a white T-shirt that fell to mid-thigh. Her feet were bare, her arms wrapped tightly around her middle. She looked small and vulnerable. Defenseless. All of which had every protective urge in him out in force.
Damn.
"Come here," he said, and lifted the edge of his covers.
She came, but then hesitated, looking down at him.
"I'm warm," he said gently, thankful she couldn't see how "warm".
"But you told me not to look at you in …
that
way, and if I come in there, I'm going to do exactly that."
Thank God for the dark. "I'll try not to notice. Come on, it's okay."
She slipped into the bed, then lay on her back a bit stiffly. Her teeth rattled, and so did something deep inside him. "Closer. Come on," he coaxed
softly, reaching out, touching her hips, urging her
on her side facing away from him. Then he scooted her back to his chest so that he could share his body heat. His own exhaustion momentarily forgotten, he stroked a hand down her quivering body, trying to rub some warmth into her.
Gradually, she started to relax, even sighing deeply, snuggling back against him for more heat. "Nice," she murmured.
Until that moment he'd managed to keep his thoughts along the lines of comfort only.
Mostly.
But with her unwittingly seductive voice, and her bottom rubbing over the part of him that had a mind of its own, comfort flew out the window.
It became difficult, if not impossible, to keep his hands on platonic areas of her body. There weren't any! Every part of her drew him, all her long, toned limbs, her sweet, soft lush curves. His fingers stroked down her slim spine, down, down, down… He groaned at the feel of her,
un
able to keep his hands from exploring.
Another deep sigh escaped her at his touch, and her breath came slow and even.
So he kept on caressing her, trying to keep still,
struggling
to
hold
back another groan because she was heaven in his hands.
"Want you, Zach," she sighed.
He froze.
She wanted him.
Reality reared up and bit him, because while he wanted her back, she couldn't want
him.
She couldn't, this was his own private torture.
Then she sighed his name and whispered it again.
"What?" he asked, praying he'd heard wrong. Nothing.
"Hannah?"
"Mmm?"
She couldn't just say that and fall asleep … could she? "Um … Hannah?"
This time he got a soft snore for an answer.
Great.
Her hair tickled his nose, her head was heavy on his arm, making it go numb. Her feet, which felt like icicles, rested on his. Her shirt had ridden up so that the only thing that separated them were silky panties and his own briefs, which were now far too tight for comfort. He was as hard as a rock, practically shaking with it, and there she lay, peaceful as a baby, getting the sleep that should be his!
It was a long, long time before he followed her into dreamland.
Chapter 5
H
annah woke up warm and toasty
and—
locked in Zach's arms!
It all came back to her in
a flood. The music, the candles … her failure.
Darn it, she'd fallen asleep on him!
Incredible as it seemed, they hadn't done anything.
Hannah would have groaned, loudly, but she was afraid to wake him, afraid to look in his eyes and face her pathetic seduction attempt.
She needed to get up. Needed to regroup. Needed a new plan. But breaking away from the blissfully slumbering Zach was actually harder than she anticipated … mostly because she didn't really want to go. Not when he looked so right in her bed, not when he was wrapped around her making her feel safe and secure.
Wanted.
Whoa. He hadn't wanted her; if he had they would've made love. She needed to remember
that when these alien warm and fuzzy feelings came over her.
Zach was here only temporarily.
Very
temporarily.
Which was yet another thing to remember. No falling for him, no matter how wonderful he felt
in
her bed.
She made herself get up. Despite her jumbling emotions, her body felt alive, really truly alive, in a way she hadn't imagined possible. Alive and … yearning. She
ached
with it. Ignoring that, she dressed.
When she went down the hall, there was the sweet old couple, Mr. and Mrs. Schwartz, sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace. They were holding hands and talking, and she thought if she could guarantee a relationship like that, then maybe someday she'd give it a shot.
"Get lucky last night, dear?" asked the sweet old lady.
"Ex—excuse me?"
"I saw your young man on his way to bed last night." She winked. "He's something, all tall, dark and attitude-ridden, isn't he?" Then she laughed lustily. "You go, girl."
Hannah managed a weak smile and went downstairs.
Alexi was already in the kitchen, digging through the refrigerator. At the sight of Hannah, a known
un
-morning person, she lifted a curious brow. "Wow. You're even dressed."
"Well, we do have guests," Hannah said, smoothing down her sundress self-consciously because she rarely wore dresses and had no idea why she'd worn one today.
Okay, she did know, but refused to attribute it to Zach. "I could hardly come down in my p.j.'s. Have you met that older couple—"
"Mr. and Mrs. Schwartz. Oh yeah. We had to switch them with another guest, that quiet young woman, Katie Minor. The Schwartzes were … uh, making noises all night, disturbing Mr. and Mrs. Peterman. Can you imagine? They must be at least seventy, right? Anyway, they're in room six now, so they can knock it out all they want, scream at the top of their lungs, swing from the rafters if they like, and they won't be able to disturb anyone."
Hannah shook her head. "Could have done without
that
image this early in the morning, thanks."
"Hmm."
Alexi studied her until Hannah squirmed. "My brother snoring?"
"Snoring? Uh … no."
Alexi, who never missed a thing, set down a bowl of fruit and came closer, eyes narrowed. "What's up with that anyway? I would've put him in my room."
What was up?
Well, wasn't that just the question of the day?
Hannah could have told Alexi everything. Right then she could have explained that their silly little toilet challenge had started her thinking. That she was feeling inexplicably lonely, even in a lodge completely full of people. That she needed more, needed to know what it was like to share intimacy with someone. That she wanted to know, for once in her life, that she was completely, totally irresistible to a man.
She wanted that man to be Zach Thomas. Strange how much she wanted that, but she couldn't hide from it.
And after last night, she doubted he'd be able to either.
She knew Alexi would have wanted to help Hannah sort this all out, but she didn't share her thoughts.
How could she when she didn't fully understand them herself?
"Hannah?"
"Nothing's up," she said as lightly as she could. "Just hungry. Can't a girl be hungry first thing in the morning?"
"Yes, but first thing in the morning is not usually before ten for you."
"I'm changing my ways." To prove that, she grabbed an apple out of the bowl and bit in. "Where's Boss?"
Boss was a sixty-five-year-old mislocated cowboy, who just happened to cook with amazing talent. They'd hired him one morning after giving him a handout, and in the nine months since, he'd been a godsend, trading off restaurant duty with Alexi.
"There's a rodeo coming to town, he's all excited. Wanted the day off to go check it out." Alexi didn't take her eyes off Hannah. "And you're changing the subject."
"It worked."
"Okay, fine. Be mysterious. I'll figure it out for myself." Alexi hopped up on the counter, crossed her arms and gave her a long look. "Let's see now … something's different about you … what is it?"
Hannah nearly laughed, but since it would have been a half-hysterical one, she managed to keep it to herself. "Don't be silly. Nothing's different."
Not yet anyway.
"If I didn't know you better, I'd say that something happened between you and Zach last night."
Yeah, something happened—exactly
nothing!
"But since you
do
know me," Hannah said, surprisingly hurt, "you know that would be ridiculous, right?"
"Right," Alexi said quietly. "Because you're not the type to go for a one-night stand. And while my brother isn't a saint by any means, Mrs. Schwartz said he was nearly unconscious with exhaustion. So that couldn't be it."
Of course not. She wasn't exactly the type of woman to inspire enough wild passion to overcome exhaustion.
But she wanted to be!
Alexi was still watching at her. "Spill it."
"I'm famished." Fishing in the refrigerator, Hannah came up with bagels, cream cheese and a carton of orange juice. "Don't suppose I can convince you to start breakfast early?"
"Don't suppose you can." But Alexi relented with a sigh, hopped off the counter and took out a frying pan. "So … you worried about something?"
Yeah, that she would die a virgin. "Such as?"
"Life," Alexi said in her usual frank manner, putting bacon to cook on the range and turning back to Hannah with a concerned expression. "You don't enjoy it enough."
Hannah thought about last night and her useless efforts. "That might have changed recently."
"It should. Have you thought about seriously trying to get some fun in your life?"
Now. Now was the time to tell Alexi that she was planning on seducing her brother, that if she was successful, Hannah wouldn't be cleaning toilets this summer.
"Honey, really, there's so much more to life than this lodge."
No kidding. There was love for one thing, an elusive, tricky emotion she knew little about. "I'm working on that fun part."
"Good. You can't live for work alone."
All
of Hannah's life she'd pretty much lived for survival. Having lost her father young, it was deeply inbred, especially since she and her brother had spent so many years watching her mother struggle just to feed them. So now maybe she went overboard sometimes, keeping her eyes only on work. But it was a hard habit to break. She intended to try.
The fact remained, though, that regardless of what drove her, Hannah loved the Norfolk Inn. It wasn't a hardship for her to throw herself one hundred percent into the place. Not to mention she actually depended on their earnings for things she'd gotten used to—like eating.
Maybe she had too much pride, she didn't know. But working had certainly gotten her through some tough spots in her life.
Such as when her mother had lost her job. Hannah had been twelve that year, Michael seventeen, and times had been very lean. Instead of going on welfare, they'd all worked, even Hannah, who'd lied about her age and cleaned houses.
They'd survived, only to lose their apartment to a fire a few years later. During it all both Hannah's mother and Michael had managed to retain a sense of themselves, separate from their necessary survival. They played and loved every bit as hard as they worked.
Somehow Hannah hadn't learned the trick of that.
Tara came dancing into the kitchen then, the only one of them a confirmed morning person. She looked perfect as always, every hair in place, impeccably dressed in a fashionable lime-green sleeveless sweater and matching suede miniskirt. She took one look at Alexi's jean shorts, then Hannah's casual sundress, and grimaced. "Have neither of you learned anything from me over the years? Clothes make the woman, ladies. And your clothes won't make anything but the thrift shop."
"Hey, and good morning to you, too," Alexi said cheerfully.
Tara poured herself some coffee, took a grateful sip and moaned with pleasure. "Darling, never mind your clothes. Your coffee will get you into heaven for certain."
"Oh, good. I was so worried." Alexi rolled her eyes and turned back to the range. "Don't you have something more important to do than diss our clothing?"
"Yep." Tara took another happy sip from her mug. "Tons. Oh, and I just saw your brother stagger out of Hannah's room."
Hannah, who'd just taken an unfortunate bite of her apple, choked.
Both Tara and Alexi stared at her odd reaction and she tried gamely to look innocent. "Sorry," she gasped, hitting her chest as the bite burned all the way down. "It went down the wrong pipe."
"I didn't expect him to be up so early," Alexi said with a frown, putting down a spatula. "Did he look okay?"
"Doesn't he always?" Tara sighed dreamily. "He wasn't wearing much, just a pair of jeans—and please let me break in here and say that man absolutely has the finest looking ass—"
"Hold it!" Alexi looked disgusted. "Jeez, that's my brother you're talking about."
"Sorry." Not looking in the least bit sorry, Tara calmly sipped at her coffee.
"Did he seem … well, still beat half to death?" Alexi was frowning over the stove. "I'm so worried about him, the way he pushes himself."
"He did look beat. A very gorgeous beat I might add." Casually Tara looked at Hannah over her steaming coffee. "He was looking for you, by the way."
Hannah managed, barely, not to choke again.
He was looking for her.
Probably wanting to know what the heck last night had been about. And when she decided how to tell him, she would. Probably. With careful precision, she smoothed her dress and studied her sandals.
"Everything all right?" Tara asked.
"Why wouldn't it be?" Not meeting anyone's gaze, she leaped off the stool she'd been sitting on and headed toward the door. On the off chance he was going to come looking for her, she needed to hightail it out of the kitchen.
She hadn't given up on her goal, not by a long shot, but she really needed a new plan. "Better run. Got lots of stuff to do."
"But what about your breakfast?" Alexi set down her wooden spoon and eyed her strangely. "You're starving, remember?"
"I just remembered … a thing I have to do."
"What thing?"
"Lots of things.
Tons
of things—" As she whirled to escape, she plowed into a hard wall.
Zach's chest.
"Hey there," he said, steadying her with his big, warm hands, hands she wanted all over her body. "Where's the fire?"
"We were just trying to figure that out ourselves," Alexi said, still eyeing Hannah oddly. "But I'm glad you're here. A room should open up today or tomorrow at the latest. In the meantime you can have my room or the office couch, okay?"
Zach, whose gaze hadn't left Hannah's, nodded. "No problem."
"I've got breakfast going," Alexi said. "Your favorites, on the house, just because. Have a seat."
He couldn't have a seat, though, because Hannah blocked the door. Unless she moved, he couldn't get past her. But she couldn't move, couldn't look at him.
She'd get all hot inside, probably turn red. Maybe start stuttering like an idiot. Dammit, what was the matter with her? This was to have been so simple.
Only ever since she'd first seen him, there hadn't been anything simple about it. Whether she liked it or not, she felt something for him, and yes she'd always felt it, even ten years ago. Only now it was intensified.
"Sorry," she murmured, backing up, giving Zach room to move past her.
But he didn't budge, and oh Lord, he was looking at her with
that
look, the one she'd discovered last night could melt her insides to butter and made her knees weak. "Stop that," she whispered.
"Stop what?" Alexi - the - super - hearing - woman wanted to know. "And why are you just standing there, Zach? I'm not going to serve you way over there."