Joanie stripped off, lay back and played with her enormous clitoris. “I want to watch you boys,” she growled, and I do mean growled. Joanie had the voice of a dockworker who smoked two packs a day. Again, all because of the steroids she had taken.
Whether it was the sound of Joanie’s growly voice, the fact that I was with Mr. America, or just the whole perversity of the situation, I got kind of turned on, and with Joanie encouraging me, I fucked Chris’s ass. Joanie, high on GHB told Chris to suck her cock as she manipulated her giant clitoris. Chris greedily began sucking on her clit while I fucked him from behind. We fucked for hours until we all came.
Afterwards, with Joanie in the shower, Chris said, “I want to date you.”
“What about Joanie?” I asked incredulously.
“I want her to be my wife, but I want you to be my boyfriend.”
“Does Joanie know about this?”
“I told her how much I like you, and I’ve never had a boyfriend before . . . ” he trailed off.
I would have been crazy to turn him down. I had fancied this guy for years, and here he was asking to date me. So what if he had a drug-crazed wife and I was dating Zak Spears, both suddenly seemed sadly disposable.
Zak called me that night.
“Zak, I have something to tell you,”
“Listen,” he interrupted, “Chi Chi is singing at Christina Applegate’s birthday party, do you want to go? We’re taking a couple of guys from
Posing Strap
as well, a guy called Lance Bronson, who is a bodybuilder from Washington, and some kid . . . I can’t remember his name.”
Christina Applegate was starring in the hilarious TV show
Married with Children
, and I thought her birthday party would be fun and very Hollywood. I had never been to a Hollywood party. I was excited. I could tell Zak I was breaking up with him another time. I didn’t want to ruin his evening.
Chi Chi and Zak picked me up at 8 p.m. I was exhausted. I’d been banging Chris Duffy all day and getting banged by Chris Dickerson all night. I was wiped out.
Posing Strap
was starting production that week, and I had two scenes. One was a three-way with Zak Spears and Jimmy Toro, a guy I’d never heard of. The second scene was a flip-flop scene with David Logan, a British porn actor whom I knew casually from London. A flip-flop scene is where you fuck and get fucked. That would be the first scene I would shoot for the movie. I wasn’t looking forward to it as David was blonde and slight and so the antithesis of what I normally fancied.
We stopped off at Lance Bronson’s hotel to pick up him with the other model. When Lance climbed into the back of the car, I nearly died of shock. He was fucking gorgeous; a corn-fed Midwestern bodybuilder. I was in lust. He was doing an oral scene with Zak Spears, having Zak just blow him as he was straight. God, I wanted to be the one blowing Lance.
Lance and I got on like a house on fire and chatted all night. He told me he was going to move to L.A. to become an action movie star, the next Arnold Schwarzenegger. I listened, enthralled by his gorgeousness. Christina Applegate’s party was boring, but we all got drunk, and Chi Chi invited Lance back home for a nightcap. Chi Chi obviously had great taste. I decided to sleep over with Zak. I was still debating whether or not to tell him I wanted to end our very brief fling. Zak and I climbed into bed, and I could hear Chi Chi and Lance in the living room making out. Derek Cruise was sleeping at his girlfriend’s for the night.
Suddenly Zak turned to me and said “Blue, I don’t think this relationship is working. I’ve got too many things in my life going on to commit to a relationship. I just think we would make better friends than lovers.”
Zak had beaten me to the punch! I wasn’t bitter. It had been a quick fling for both of us and I had made a good friend who I enjoy to this very day.
My first day of shooting on
Posing Strap
rolled around. The plot of the film was that Zak Spears—wearing makeup to make him look like an old man—was in an art gallery, looking back to the days when he was a famous erotic art photographer in the Fifties. (Flashback to Zak, photographing the models wearing posing straps. They become hot for each other and start fucking.) Other than this there was no plot whatsoever I don’t think. At least none I was involved in.
I didn’t fancy my co-star David Logan, and he didn’t fancy me, so the scene was agony. It took hours and hours to film. He had to fuck me, and I had to fuck him, and neither of us could stay hard.
The cameraman was incredibly patient, and we somehow got through the scene, and came. I apologized to the cameraman, and he laughed and said not to worry, the scene looked great. When the film came out, astonishingly, it did! This was the first scene where I was filmed fucking somebody, and, much worse I decided, them fucking me. I immediately realized I would rather be the one doing the fucking on film. Getting fucked hurt, you were tense, your arse was tight and it was incredibly un-erotic. You were balanced on crates with a crew underneath you, inches away from your arsehole. If your dick went soft, you had to lift it up and away from the camera so as not to ruin the shot. You shoot the “insertion shot” again and again until you get the perfect shot, and then you need a minimum of twelve good strokes of somebody’s dick going in and out of your arse. I used to count them. I hated getting fucked on camera. Even by a straight guy, I hated it.
After I showered and returned to the set, they had set up for the next scene with Zak and my “crush” Lance Bronson. Lance was to lie back and let Zak eat his arse and suck his dick. I was rock hard in my pants. Great, I can’t get hard all day, and now I’m pre-cumming in my pants at the sight of Lance Bronson’s pink virgin arsehole.
Chi Chi shooed us away. Lance was having real problems getting hard. He wasn’t just soft—his dick was concave. When straight boys want to get hard on gay porn sets a monitor is set up off-camera so straight porn can be played to get the boys aroused. Or they look at straight magazines. In very rare cases, a girl is brought on the set. I’ve only heard of this twice. Once, was when the porn star Billy Brandt was making a movie for the genius director Michael Zen. Billy’s girlfriend Sheera lay next to the bed spreading her vagina open. Billy fucked his girlfriend then pulled his dick out of his girlfriend’s pussy and stuck it in his co-star’s mouth. This carried on until his co-star vomited because he said his mouth tasted of vagina.
Anything would be done on the porn sets to get the actors hard. I carried a little paperback book in my gym bag called
Handjobs
that was full of dirty stories. I would read them until I got hard, then run back to the set and fuck my co-star. Of course, the films were all safe sex, so you not only had to run back to the set, you had to first put on a condom, and the crew had to jump back into position. By the time all of this was done, I would be soft again.
To get Lance Bronson hard, Chi Chi, in desperation, called Sharon Kane to come and fluff him on the set. People were always asking me how they could get a job as a fluffer. A fluffer is somebody who sucks the model’s dick to get him hard for the filming. The actual job position doesn’t exist. It’s an urban legend. Although years later I was hanging about on a set of a Gino Colbert straight movie starring superstar Ken Ryker and an actress called Devon Shire. Devon was in a bad mood because she was having her period that day and she kept saying to poor Ken Ryker, “Get over here, faggot, and fuck my pussy before I start bleeding again.”
Ken was traumatized and couldn’t stay hard, so Gino asked if I would fluff him in the bathroom to help him relax. Ken Ryker had an eleven-inch dick, so I jumped right in. We smoked a little pot, and I started sucking Ken’s dick. Unfortunately, we got a little carried away and he shot his load in my mouth. We ran onto the set, and Ken tried to squeeze Mr. Softie into Devon’s pussy. The scene was a disaster, but Gino forgave me . . . and after creative editing, the film came out looking great. (Always employ the best editor money can buy; if the raw footage of the movie is a little rough, he will save the film for you.)
So that was my one and only experience as a fluffer, although I would have fluffed Lance Bronson in a second.
With the help of Sharon Kane, Zak and Lance’s oral scene was shot successfully. The next day was my big scene, a three-way with Zak and Jimmy Toro.
The day started off extremely badly and only got progressively worse. To economize, somebody had rented extremely cheap lights that exploded the moment they were plugged in. This delayed filming for hours during which I realized that Zak wasn’t really talking to me, as I think he was embarrassed that we had broken up and now we were shooting a scene together. I felt as uncomfortable having sex with Zak as he did with me. Who wants to have sex with somebody they have just broken up with? Especially on film.
The third guy in the scene turned out to be a skinny little Mexican kid that neither Zak nor I fancied. So I knew this scene was going to be hell . . . and it was.
“Are you Mexican?” I asked the kid.
“No, I’m Cuban,” he corrected. I looked at him doubtfully.
“Yes, yes, I’m Mexican,” he wailed, “But I thought you would want a Cuban more.”
I don’t know why he thought that. I didn’t care if the kid was Mexican or Cuban or from Nicaragua, I just wanted to be able to stay hard on camera.
As it turned out none of us could stay hard. I was walking around in a cowboy hat and a dirty, flesh colored posing strap that I had worn for two days. We broke for lunch, which consisted of buckets of delicious Kentucky Fried Chicken, something I enjoyed but tried to avoid. We sat around gorging ourselves on the greasy fast food until it was time to get back to work. Our scene that would eventually run twenty-five minutes in the finished film took twelve hours to shoot. By the end of the day, I was sweaty, filthy, and my dick was sore. I was furious. Chi Chi tried to placate me.
“It isn’t nearly as bad as this normally.”
“I will never, NEVER make another porn movie as long as I live,” I raged.
“Oh, they all say that,” Chi Chi laughed. He was right of course.
I ended up making only one more film with Chi Chi directing. An oral film entitled
Blow Me Down.
Making oral films is a great way for the studios to cut costs. They are made with the excuse that some people only want to see guys give each other blowjobs. The models are paid half their normal rate, which subsequently cuts the budget in half. The best thing about
Blow Me Down
was that I worked with a sexy, humpy, short skinhead model called Max Stone. Catalina, the company I had made
Seeds of Love
for, produced the film. Catalina must have liked my performance because I ended up making ten more films for them.
Although Chi Chi and I never worked together again we would bump into each other at various award shows and parties. Chi Chi LaRue went on to be probably the most influential person in porn history. He ended up starting his own distribution and production company called Channel One and purchasing both All Worlds and Catalina Studios. Over the years I developed an appreciation for Chi Chi that I never thought I would have when I first met him in that small apartment surrounded by plastic dolls on Melrose Avenue. How can you not appreciate someone who starts off as a small town drag queen and goes on to become an icon?
The other films I made for Catalina all became a bit of a blur because none were very memorable. There was
Peep-O-Rama,
in which I had sex with a really hot straight guy from Canada whose name I forget;
Hidden Instinct
which I can’t for the life of me recall even making;
Idol Dreams
starring Tony Idol, who was trying to pass as Ryan Idol’s younger brother; and eight more movies. They all seemed to be set in a sex club in Los Angeles called “The Block,” which would double as anything from warehouses and garages to docking bays, etc. Josh Elliott, whom I really liked, directed the majority of these films. He was very easygoing, and he had a great crew. We laughed all the time. Josh seemed to know that the films he made were cheap and cheerful and he never seemed to take anything too seriously.
All this time I was in a full-on relationship with Chris Duffy and his wife Joanie. They would both come to my apartment, and we would fuck all day with Joanie high on GHB. Gage, having grown bored with all the local transsexuals, had flown his girlfriend Stephanie in from England and she was living with us. Stephanie had no problem with Gage escorting as she was madly in love with him. Although he was spending money quicker than he could make it, he still refused to do porn films. He had made a jerk off film for Chi Chi but he hated the whole process of being filmed jerking off. Luckily, he was busy as an escort.
I decided I needed to branch out from Catalina, so I started looking for other film companies to work for. Mocha had given my name to Rick Ford, the guy who made all of the straight marine jerk-off films. One day when I was at the gym my beeper went off with a message to phone Mocha.
“Blue, I’m on the set of a film and one of the actors has flaked on us. Rick Ford told me to offer you the lead role. It’s a day shooting here and a day shooting in San Diego. There’s a ton of dialogue and I told Rick Ford you’re a really good actor. We are shooting in a garage in West Hollywood . . . can you be here in thirty minutes?”
No-shows on porn sets are a common occurrence because porn stars are notoriously unreliable. Luckily, I hadn’t jerked off that morning so I was young, hung and full of cum. I hadn’t worked for All Worlds before so I was curious to shoot for a new company, and I had heard that Rick Ford was a really nice guy. I dashed home and threw on a pair of jeans and a lumberjack shirt with the sleeves cut off.