Out of Turn (32 page)

Kade followed and I felt his eyes on me as I gazed upward at the sky. The
whoosh
of a rocket launching reached my ears, then the sparkle and crackle of the firework as it exploded.

“I won’t say I’m sorry, because I’m not,” Kade said.

I shrugged. “It’s not a big deal. It doesn’t mean anything, right?” Hell, we’d done more than kiss in Vegas and that hadn’t done a thing to change our relationship.

No. I wasn’t being fair to Kade, after all, he had no idea how far things had gone between us. But I did, and my body did. Maybe that was why it had taken little more than a furtive encounter in a closet for me to fall under his spell.

I felt dangerously close to bitter, which was not how I wanted to remember Kade.

Another firework was launched, exploding into a brilliant show of color, then fading to ashes. Kind of like Kade and me, I supposed.

“I think we both know that’s not true.”

I jumped, not realizing Kade had moved directly behind me, his voice in my ear.

“Then what does it mean?” I asked, turning and looking up into his eyes. “Enlighten me.” And perhaps part of that bitterness I was feeling leached into my voice.

Kade’s fingers caressed my jaw. “It means you’re beautiful. Desirable. That I can’t keep my hands off you any more than I can tell my heart to stop beating. It means I listen for your voice when I know you’re near and love it when I can smell your perfume on my clothes at the end of the day.”

I couldn’t breathe and the knot in the pit of my stomach grew to the size of my fist.

“Stop it!” I cried, shoving at his chest. I’d taken him off guard and he stumbled back a few steps. “Stop saying things like that! You can’t…
tell
me all of that and then walk off like it’s no big deal! You’re killing me.”

He stared at me, silent.

I took a breath and swallowed the lump in my throat. “Offer me something or offer me nothing, but stop trying to play both sides.” Because that’s what he was doing. Pushing me at Blane, telling me we should reconcile, then getting upset when he saw the ring on my finger. Kissing me, touching me, then saying it could lead nowhere.

Yes, he’d told me he loved me in Vegas, but he’d been drunk at the time and didn’t remember saying it. Unless it was an emotion he was willing to own up to sober, it didn’t really matter, did it?

I searched his eyes, not breathing, and hoped for… I didn’t know what. To my disappointment, Kade turned away without a word. I watched his form be absorbed by the darkness as he walked to the house.

Two steps forward, three steps back.

I remained outside, unable to bear the thought of going inside just yet. I slumped down on the grass and watched the fireworks. I could hear the people laughing and talking as they shot off rockets. The frugal part of me cringed at every explosion, adding up the dollars in my head. I’d never seen the point of buying fireworks—it was literally like setting your money on fire. But I liked watching them, and if other people wanted to blow their money in that fashion, who was I to judge?

I thought about Kandi. She’d been having sex with Blane… and James. Why? Had she been hoping to make one of them jealous? Had she known how much James hated Blane? What if she hadn’t told James and he’d found out she was sleeping with Blane, too? Could he have flipped out enough to kill her? Maybe accidentally?

My eyelids were heavy when I finally decided to call it a night. I brushed the grass off my jeans and went inside. I showered and wrapped myself in a towel, my wet hair clinging to my shoulders. I hoped I was tired enough to sleep. Part of me ached for my own apartment, but another part of me was glad to be here, glad to be with Blane and Kade, despite the tension between the three of us.

I walked out of the bathroom and froze.

Blane was sitting on my bed, the dim glow of the bedside lamp casting pools of light and shadow on his body.

He was silent, his gaze steady on mine before it dropped lower, taking in the damp towel I wore. Memories of our kiss earlier tonight assaulted me. My breath caught in my chest and I had to swallow before I could speak.

“What are you doing in here?” I asked.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to intrude. I just… need to talk to you.”

I shifted my weight from one bare foot to the other, acutely conscious of my nakedness. Was this about Kade, or about us? I didn’t know if I was ready for either conversation.

Yet, if it was important enough to make him invade my room at this hour, then I should probably hear him out. “It’s okay. What is it?”

He approached me, stopping when he was close. “I wanted to tell you that you were right about my uncle. I confronted him with what you told me while you were in Vegas, that he had tried to pay you off. He admitted it quite openly.”

Vindication. It was a good feeling.

“I’m so sorry, Kat,” Blane said, his voice a husky whisper. “I had no idea, never thought for a moment that he would do something like that. Which also explains why, when you didn’t take the bribe, he resorted to lying to me about you.”

Yes, I could have told Blane all that months ago. Too bad he wouldn’t have listened.

“But how could you do that to me, Blane?” I asked, unable to stop the question from tumbling out. “How could you believe I’d cheat on you? The man I was supposed to marry?” It was a question I’d wanted an answer to for months. “You risked your life to track me down and rescue me from Summers. How could you think I’d betray you?”

“I have no excuse, Kat,” Blane said. “I could stand here and tell you I’ve never loved a woman before, not like I love you, and it terrified me. I could tell you that I was too afraid to believe we could be happy, that it all wouldn’t disappear
in smoke and lies. So when I saw those photos, it was almost a relief after waiting for my dreams to shatter, when they finally did.”

His voice was choked, his eyes too bright and vividly green, but he kept talking.

“But those are just excuses,” he said. “I believed the wrong thing. I made a horrible mistake. I thought the two people I loved the most had betrayed me in the worst possible way, and I couldn’t handle it. I couldn’t see or hear anything but what I thought was the truth. I sabotaged our happiness. My uncle had never lied to me before. Why would I doubt him?”

“Neither had I, but you doubted me,” I said.

My stomach churned and my chest ached. I hadn’t felt this much pain since the day it had gone so wrong between us.

“Can you forgive me?” he asked.

I looked at him. Who was I to withhold forgiveness? Everyone made mistakes, hurt the ones they loved, and I was no exception. If the situation were reversed, I’d want absolution, too.

“Yes,” I said. “I forgive you.”

Relief swept his features, and it felt like something inside me had echoed that feeling, like a knot tied too tight finally loosened. Forgiveness was good for the soul, my soul.

Blane took my hand in his, glancing down at the ring on my finger.

“How do you live with a regret so deep it cuts through every part of you?” he murmured.

I didn’t know what to say, and perhaps wouldn’t have been able to speak even if the right words had come. The lump in my throat felt as though it would strangle me.

Blane leaned down and pressed his lips to my forehead for a long moment, then he was gone.

Somehow, I knew sleep wouldn’t come easy tonight after all.

The doorbell rang as I came downstairs the next morning, and I swung by to answer it. A man stood on the doorstep with a large manila envelope in his hand.

“Can I help you?”

“Is Mr. Kirk available?”

“Hey, Jared, come in.”

Blane had come up behind me. Apparently, he knew the guy. I stepped back to let him in.

“Jared, this is Kathleen, my… fiancée.”

That was like a punch to the gut.

“Kathleen, this is Detective Jared Jones.”

Ah. Blane’s friend in the department. We shook hands.

“Let’s meet in the den,” Blane said, gesturing to the door. Jared headed that direction. Blane turned toward me.

“You don’t have to come,” he said. “The photographs… I’m sure they won’t be pretty.”

“I want to,” I said simply.

He searched my eyes, then nodded and took my hand, following Jared into the den. Kade was already in there. Blane introduced Kade, mentioning that he was a private investigator rather than his brother.

“What do you have?” Blane asked.

Jared handed him the envelope. “It looks bad,” he said.

Blane dumped the pile of papers and photos onto the table. Kade picked up a few and started reading.

The photos were what jumped out at me. I picked one up. Kandi’s eyes were open, staring sightlessly. I’d never seen her without makeup and she looked softer, younger without it.

The livid marks on her neck drew my eye as Jared spoke.

“Initially, we thought the cause of death was strangling,” he said. “Turns out she was smothered.”

I glanced up at him, then back at the photographs, choosing another that showed bruises on her upper arms, like someone had grabbed her. I was more interested in a close-up of her neck, visible in one corner of the photo.

“What is that?” I asked, pointing.

Blane peered over my shoulder and frowned, taking the photo from me to look more closely. He handed it to Jared.

“Those two marks,” he said, pointing to what I’d seen on her neck. They were tiny, maybe only a quarter of an inch long, and close together.

“The ME thinks they’re from a stun gun,” Jared said. “It would have immobilized her, then he smothered her.”

More photos, some I couldn’t look at, of injuries and bruises on more intimate parts of her body.

“The killer was dumb, though,” Jared said. “Left semen, so we have DNA.”

Blane’s head jerked up at that, which confused me. He’d told the cops he hadn’t slept with Kandi that night, although he had, but he’d used a condom so the semen couldn’t be his. It had to be James’s.

“Who are they thinking did it?” Blane asked.

“Well,” Jared said with a sigh, “you. They’re working on a warrant for your DNA.”

“It’s not mine,” Blane told him.

“I believe you,” Jared replied, “but like I said, it looks bad.”

Blane went to his desk, retrieving the tie and scarves from last night and handing them to Jared. “We found these last night among Kandi’s things,” he said. “Can you test for DNA against the semen you found?”

Jared nodded. “I’ll get this cataloged as evidence, say I found them or something. You think the guy was someone she was seeing?”

“Yes, and she’d been secretly seeing James Gage.”

“The district attorney?” Jared asked with surprise.

Blane nodded. “We’re not sure exactly how long, but it had been going on for a while.” He hesitated, then added, “James has a track record of violence, especially against women.”

Yeah. I could vouch for that.

Jared’s eyes got even wider. “You’re kidding.”

“I wish I were.”

“Well, even if the DNA does match, we have no way of proving it’s his,” Jared said. “He’s not in the database.”

“If we got a sample from him, you could match it,” Blane said.

“Yeah, but how do you plan on doing that? You’re the prime suspect in a murder that he’ll no doubt prosecute. Everyone knows there’s no love lost between the two of you. He won’t let you within three feet.”

“I’ll think of something,” Blane said.

Jared left a few minutes later, leaving Blane, Kade, and me studying the file.

I took a deep breath before speaking, already knowing how this was going to go. “I could get the DNA.”

The “No” was resounding and simultaneous from both men, neither of whom even glanced up from the papers and photos they were studying.

I blew out a frustrated breath. “I’m not going to just sit around and do nothing while James does all he can to ruin you,” I said to Blane.

“He’s not going to ruin me,” Blane said, flipping a page of the report in his hand.

“I want to help,” I insisted.

“You’ve already helped. You lied to the police to give me an alibi.” Blane’s tone said he didn’t appreciate that overly much.

“You let her lie for you?” Kade interjected.

Blane looked up. “I didn’t ‘let’ her do anything. I locked her in my bedroom to keep her away, but she got out. I don’t suppose you know who taught her how to pick a lock, do you?”

Kade flipped him off and Blane gave a disgruntled snort before resuming his study of the case file.

I waited a moment before adding in an undertone to Blane, “By the way, I really didn’t appreciate being locked away like the crazy aunt. That really ticked me off.”

“Did it? I hadn’t noticed.” The eye roll was implied.

I kicked off my shoes and tucked my feet up under me as I thought. There had to be a way to get DNA from James without it being too dangerous. I just needed some bodily fluid or hair.

“Do you work tonight?” Kade asked.

I nodded. “My shift starts at six,” I said, and I had an idea.

It was a holiday, so the bar would close by 9:00
P.M.
Romeo bitched about it every year, saying people wanted to have a drink after watching fireworks, so why should he close? But Kade and Blane wouldn’t realize the bar closed early.