Pawn of the Billionaire (5 page)

I took a deep breath, a very deep breath and found I had to lean against the cool restroom wall. My throbbing pussy lips felt swollen and tender, and I could feel dampness seeping. Oh God! Could I do this? But could I walk away? Whether he felt attracted to me or not, there was no doubt that I was attracted to him.

But, marriage?

I
was still asking
myself the question as I peered into my tiny, spotty mirror in my room later that evening. James hadn’t wanted to talk more.

“Just think about what I’ve said so far, Toni. There’s been a huge amount for you to take in. Just think about it, and let the surprise settle. I’ll call you in a couple of days, then we can talk some more.” Then he’d changed the subject and we’d talked about his home, where he’d grown up, and life in England.

“
C
ome on
, Edward, it’s a great opportunity, old boy.” Terence’s drawl cut through my pounding headache, and I groaned. Why did my head ache so much? Perhaps I needed a drink. I rolled over. What the fuck was I doing here, lying on a soiled mattress in a sleazy-looking room with my vision blurred?

I glanced over at the table. Traces of white powder and a few torn papers told me all I needed to know. My life had taken a wrong turn sometime in the past and I hadn’t the first clue how to get out of it.

“You haven’t been listening, you sod.” Terence reached over and pulled at my lapels. I’d been sleeping in my suit again. I muttered angrily. Another suit ruined.

I laughed, imagining Father’s reaction. He’d go bleating off to little brother James. James, who my father doted on. James, who Father wished was the heir. Bloody nerd, I hated him for becoming what I should’ve become, what I could’ve become if it hadn’t been for the drugs, the drugs and the booze together, sliding me into oblivion.

“Edward!” Terence sounded even more annoyed. “Come on, mate, get your shit together. We’ve got a plane to catch.”

“A plane?” I stared hard, waiting until Terence turned into one guy again, instead of the two who’d been blurring in my vision.

“Yes, you crack-head! Plane. We’ve been given tickets out to the Philippines for a couple of months. It’ll be warm. Warm and cheap and women.” Terence hauled me to my feet. “Come on, we’ve got to get out of here.”

Well, I didn’t mind the Philippines. The living was easy and relaxed and I’d be away from all the pressure and the expectations. Good. I sat on the edge of the bed and fished around with my feet for my shoes. Then I patted my pocket to check my wallet was still there. Good. Terence was a good mate, watched over me, and God knew, I needed that.

I shook my head again to clear it and stood up. Terence and three of the other guys were there.

“We’ve called a cab.” Steven spoke to Terence. “Has he got money?”

“Yep.” Terence glanced over at me. “You’ve still got your wallet, haven’t you, Edward?”

I nodded. I knew full well the other guys only tolerated me because Terence insisted - and because I often had the means to pay when they’d spent all their money on drugs. Still, they were all the friends I had.

I looked over at the bed. She was lying on her back, naked, the sheet only covering her lower body. She was flat out and snoring. I didn’t have the faintest idea who she was. I shrugged and turned away.

At the airport, the attendants looked disapprovingly at us. But the searches came up clear and we boarded just in time. I stared out of the window and shivered. My mouth tasted vile and I had no toiletries with me. I rubbed my face, and felt the tangle of a week’s worth of beard growth. Fuck! I must look a sight. I leaned my head back, and was asleep.

T
erence shook
me when we came into land. I looked down.

“Where the hell are we?”

“Turkey.” His voice was terse. “Connecting flight here.” He pulled me to my feet, and we made our weary way to the ground. The airport was grey and miserable-looking. I was getting used to seeing guards with guns. These days they were common even in British airports. I stood idly by while Terence and Steve argued at the check-in desk. Then they joined the rest of the group.

“Come over here, Edward!” Terence called impatiently, and I pulled myself together and wandered over to them.

“Look, we missed the connecting flight and there isn’t another direct one until Wednesday from here. Some stupid local holiday.” He looked challengingly at us. “But we can use these tickets on another flight out of Macedonia tomorrow lunchtime. So I’ve reserved us seats, and we’ll get a car to take us across the border, okay?”

That was okay, of course it was. None of us had any inclination to do any thinking, so we wound our way to the car rental place. The atmosphere was tired and uncaring. The tide of recent refugees had made us unremarkable, and it was the end of a long shift. I suspected that got us waved through the border without being checked.

So I didn’t discover that my wallet was missing until we returned the car at the airport. Terence swore blue, and the other guys looked at me, hostile.

“You must’ve had it nicked after we landed, because you had your passport then, you absolute fucking idiot!” Terence was giving me a headache, I thought vaguely.

All right, he’d been a good mate since we were at school, but I’d always paid for everything, and his language was a bit uncalled for. I felt aggrieved.

I tried to keep my dignity. “It’s quite all right.” I reached into the hidden hole in the lining of my jacket. Wriggling my finger in, I was able to extract the tightly folded notes. “Look, I always carry spare money.”

“Thank God for that!” Terence took it and unfolded the notes. “At least we put the car on your credit card. So we can use some of this to buy you a fake passport.” He poked a finger in my chest. “You stay here with Steve, you idiot. I’ll have to go to the refugee hangout, see what I can get.”

I nodded. I didn’t want to get turned away from the plane, be left here alone without the means to get home. I wondered what I’d done to get friends like this, friends that even I knew were only tolerating me while I could pay for what they wanted.

I couldn’t see that I was worth having as a real friend, and I needed these people more than they needed me. And they knew it. I felt very alone. I wondered if I’d ever have the strength to change things, live again like I had as a child, the secure childhood with loving family and the staff to do everything that was needed.

It was a long time before Terence came back. He threw me a passport. “That’s the best that I could get.” He turned away. “It’ll do. The checks going out of the country aren’t as rigorous as they should be.”

I opened the passport and looked inside. I was an ordinary German man. Hans Bluther. No longer an English aristocrat. I smiled. Maybe it was better like this. His photo even looked vaguely like me.

“Come on, it’s time to board.” Terence took charge again, and we trooped obediently over to the check-in desks. Terence stood and watched the staff for a few moments. “There,” he said. “Him. He’s not checking properly.”

It was no time at all before we were on the plane. Thankfully, they even fed us, although the meal wasn’t very appetizing. But I was hungry, and I managed to eat well.

It had been a long night and a busy day. As the plane crept out over the ocean, seemingly motionless, I found myself getting sleepy. Terence next to me, was already snoring. I leaned back and stretched out my legs.

It should be good to land in the warmth and welcome of the Philippines. The people were friendly and helpful. I could contact Father, get a duplicate credit card sent to the Embassy. I smiled to myself. He’d be surprised I was in the Far East. The world was a smaller place than when he’d been a boy.

Soon I was asleep.

S
omething made me stir
. Something wasn’t right. I struggled to come to as the engines didn’t sound right. I opened my eyes just as the oxygen masks fell into our laps. What was going on? Someone screamed behind me. The plane seemed to be diving very fast. We couldn’t be there yet.

T
he weekend dragged past
. I found myself roaming the house, unable to concentrate, waiting for it to be Monday. Toni took center stage in my thoughts all weekend, and I had to fight the urge to call her, find out what she was doing in those few hours she had free when she wasn’t working.

The meal out on Thursday had made me question what I was doing. I couldn’t understand the way my body reacted to her. I’d never experienced the type of instant attraction that I felt towards her. I wanted to bring her home, take her to my bed, fuck her hard and see her come apart under my hands. It had been even more difficult when I could see that she felt the attraction too.

It had only been my shame, really, that stopped me from taking advantage of her that night. My shame that I knew perfectly well that she thought I was hinting that I wanted her to become my wife and not Edward’s, and my shame that I let her think that. I knew that if I said I was looking for her to marry Edward, she’d walk away. I could sense her attraction to me, but I was ashamed that I used it to keep her attention on what I was proposing.

It was just as well that I’d be sending her to Switzerland. But despite my shame, my mind had spent the last few days making covert plans. I had my eye on a cozy little chalet nestled into the side of a mountain near Lausanne. It was close to the finishing school. I was sure I could run my business mostly from there for a while, and I told myself it would be fun to teach her to ski, too.

I went to my suite, leaned against the door, and looked at my bed. I breathed in, closed my eyes, imagined myself lifting her naked body and placing her in the center of the bed. I stood over her, seeing her eyes wide as she watched me strip, her lips parted, swollen with our kiss. I could almost smell her arousal, her desire, and I groaned as my cock swelled in my jeans. Fuck! I had to have her. Nothing else mattered.

Thank God part of her training would include utter discretion, and once she was out of my system then I could pass her on to Edward, and she’d become my sister-in-law. I grinned. She’d always be there for me, and probably glad of a diversion from him.

I pushed down the distaste at the thought of him pawing her, taking her. I reminded myself that it would be after I’d tired of her, resenting having a woman in my life. I always tired of them. I always wanted to be free, and I could never wait long to move on.

I drew a deep breath. Smiled. Before I tired of her, she was going to be amazing. I could already imagine taking her, molding her into the woman I wanted.

I
t was time
. I went back to my study, flung myself in my chair, and took a deep breath. I took my phone and called her.

She answered, her voice preoccupied.

“Good morning, Toni. It’s James. How are you this morning?”

“Oh.” She sounded as if she almost dropped her phone. “Sorry, I wasn’t expecting you to call just yet.” She sounded hesitant. “I didn’t know it was your number. I’ll have to add it to my contacts.” She was babbling, making inane remarks.

“What’s the matter, Toni?” My body was wanting her, even just on the phone, her voice made me hard for her. I shifted in the chair. “Didn’t you think I’d call?”

She giggled nervously. “Not really. It doesn’t seem like it’s true. And …”

“And what?” The silence drew out uncomfortably. I waited, wondering what the real problem was.

Eventually, I heard her sigh. “Oh, nothing really, I suppose.” The background noises drew my attention.

“Where are you, Toni? Are you at home?”

“No.” She huffed a laugh. “I’m at the library, working. I do all my research here.”

I smiled. “You’re researching your family history.”

She sounded disbelieving. “Of course not. I’m studying. I come here every day when I’m not working.”

I scrambled to rescue the conversation. Of course, I’d read that she visited the library in her time off, but I hadn’t taken any notice. Now I wished I’d found out more. She definitely sounded pissed off.

“Of course. Studying.” I wondered what she was learning. “I was wondering if you’d thought at all about our conversation on Thursday, if you’d got any questions?” I found I was holding my breath.

“Well, yeah.” She sounded absent-minded, and I heard the click of the keyboard. “I don’t know enough to make any decisions. I need to ask you some stuff. But I can’t talk here, the librarian’s giving me a dirty look.”

“Wait!” I didn’t want her to cut the line. “Could the car pick you up after you’ve finished? We could have tea and discuss things.” I waited, but she didn’t answer. “Will you have finished by three?”

“All right. I’ll be at home.” Her voice was just a murmur, and the connection went dead.

I relaxed back into the chair. I felt relieved that we’d got that sorted at least. But I was concerned, and I didn’t like the feeling. Why did I get the impression she was reluctant? I knew I’d said to my father that not many girls would want to do this, but then I’d been assuming they would know Edward was the heir. Surely Toni would jump at the idea? Her home and her job meant such a crappy existence, that there must be another reason.

I got up and retrieved the folder of information on her from my desk. Back in the chair, I leafed through it. No sign of a boyfriend for a while. No sign of any social life, really. I frowned and began to read more carefully. It didn’t look as if she did anything apart from work and go to the library on her days off.

Skimming back through her timeline, it looked as if she’d got cut off from her friends at about the time her mother got ill, and that caring for her had taken up all her energy and her spark. The investigator’s conversations with people that had known her in the past showed a girl with a zest for life and an energy and enthusiasm for new experiences. A girl that I hadn’t seen last week. I wondered if it was just tiredness and exhaustion with her, or if she hadn’t really got over her mother’s death. Then again, I had to admit to myself, I’d barely really looked at her. My body had been so driven by lust, I’d just seen her superficially.

No. I had to stop this. I couldn’t get too closely involved. I must not. All I had to be concerned with was that she was suitable to become the next Countess, and that she had the energy and enthusiasm to do what that job entailed. And I’d like to see her have a happier life, but that couldn’t be difficult, seeing how she was living now.

I stuffed the papers back in the folder and strode to the window. I wondered what would happen this afternoon. I had to persuade her to agree to this, and I wanted her here for a few days before she went to Switzerland. I turned. I needed some exercise, and to take my mind off this conjecturing.

“Lawrence, any meetings scheduled for the next hour or so? I was thinking I might fit in a swim.” He must wonder what had got into me, I thought, amused, but when he shook his head, I took off for the pool room.

I needed a hard workout, so I ignored the view and surroundings, powering up and down for fifty or so lengths until I felt better. When I heaved myself out of the water, I toweled my hair off while looking out over the hillside. Below in the distance I could see the crowded part of the city where she lived and worked. The edge of the infinity pool seemed to vanish into the horizon, the water pouring over the edge. Surely, she’d want to stay here?

A
t three-thirty
, I was waiting by the front steps as the car rolled to a halt. As the driver opened the door, I nodded at him, and went forward as she climbed out. My jaw tightened. She’d have to learn how to look elegant getting out of a car. There was so much to teach her, I almost wished I could do that myself.

“Hello, Toni. Thanks for coming over.”

Her eyes wandered over the house and grounds. “That’s okay. I’ve got questions too.”

I smiled. “Then let’s have some tea.” And I led the way up the stairs to the great front door. I liked my house, but I had to admit it’s not everyone’s taste. Toni didn’t make any comment as I led her through the hall and along to my office, but she gave a low cry of delight as we went into it. Without commenting, she moved over to the great wall of windows, looking out over the edge of the city and the hills beyond.

I went and stood beside her, enjoying her first experience of my home. I watched her out of the corner of my eye. Her eyes were shining, and a touch of color had come to her face. We stood in silence for some minutes before she sighed and dragged her gaze back into the room.

“It’s a lovely office. It must be so easy to work here.” She smiled. “I think I’d have had a desk nearer the window though. It’s such a fantastic view.”

I smiled too. “Yes. But it can be distracting.” I pointed out my desk. “I sit there, so I can see the view, but it doesn’t distract me too much.” I saw her glance over to Lawrence’s desk.

“That’s where my private secretary works from.” I sensed her tense. “But he’s over at the business this afternoon.”

She turned away. “Oh, yes. Your business card said you were an app developer. It sounds interesting.”

There was an edge to her voice that I couldn’t quite place, and I wished David would bring the tea things soon to break the tension.

“Yes. I got lucky. I got into apps when it was still possible to begin small and I’ve got a fantastic team now. I suppose it’s all down to being in the right place at the right time and being prepared to work incredibly hard.” I took her elbow and indicated the sofa and that we should sit down.

“David will be bringing in afternoon tea in a moment,” I said quietly. “But we don’t have to wait for that. What questions have you got still about your heritage and becoming titled?”

She was sitting up, her chin in her hand, staring out of the windows. God, she was gorgeous. But dreadful. Dreadful clothes, dreadful accent, really, dreadfully ungainly. I smiled tightly to myself. It was going to take a lot of work to train her, teach her the right way to be, to do things. It was a shame she’d be going to Lausanne. It would be a lot of fun to break her in.

She looked around. “How much of all this is money you’ve earned from apps? How much from being an Earl’s son?”

I blinked. I supposed it was a relevant question, but it wasn’t really the done thing. Still, she was new to all this. I had to be honest, as honest as possible. “All of this is from the apps. Toni, one thing you’ll find out is that the English aristocracy is generally pretty hard-up. I know that sounds odd, when you know what real poverty is, but Earls and other peers have large commitments that just eat money.” I sat forward so that I could see her face. “Just as an example, my own father has just been ordered by the Listed buildings people - they’re the ones that are in charge of making sure that historic buildings are properly looked after - anyway, my father’s been ordered that the whole roof of the country house has to be replaced. We can’t just repair it. That’s going to be about three million pounds. That’s four and a half million dollars.” I saw her eyes widen in shock, and she gave a little gasp.

I continued relentlessly. “And we can’t just sell it. Nobody really wants that sort of place. You’re not allowed to rebuild it into somewhere nicer to live. They cost a fortune in upkeep, and there are all sorts of other expenses too.” I smiled. “Thankfully, the Sandiford estate is secure. I’ve made enough money that the investment income can pay all the costs of running it into the future. And the business earns more than enough for everything else.” I made myself stop there. Boasting about money wasn’t a good idea. And it certainly wasn’t done. “I’m not saying that to boast, Toni. And we don’t talk about money. But you need to know this when you make your decision. You’ll never have to worry again.”

There was a discreet knock on the door, and David wheeled in the tea trolley.

“Thanks, David.” I watched Toni as I spoke. She was watching the butler with fascinated eyes as he drew the trolley to a convenient point beside her and lifted the cover off the cake tiers. He nodded, and left the room, closing the door silently behind him.

There was a long silence. “Would you like to pour the tea?” I thought we might as well start the right way. She looked at me.

“Because I’m so not used to that.” Her smile robbed her words of malice, and she reached for the teapot.

“Use the tea strainer,” I said quietly. “We use leaf tea. That’s right, and pass the milk jug for people to add their own milk.”

Her eyebrows hit her hairline. She looked as if she was about to explode. I had to defuse things.

“Just a taste of what your life will be like.” I grinned. “But most of the time it’ll be mugs in the kitchen.”

“Oh,” she said as she relaxed back with her tea. “It’s all a bit delicate for me.”

I watched her, imagined her in a swirling gown, her hair piled elegantly on top of her head. Then my mind stripped her, and I saw her naked in front of me, her limbs lithe and smooth under my hands. I jumped and forced my mind away.

“I’m sorry, I missed that.” I looked questioningly, sure that she’d spoken.

She was looking at me, puzzled. “I said I don’t think I’m really interested in what you’re offering.”

My heart plummeted. “What?” I’d been so sure she’d be desperate to get away from her life.

She smiled, looking rueful. “Not that it wouldn’t be nice to live like this.” She lifted her eyes, and looked around the room. “No. It’s that I have ideas, something I want to do. This would take up my whole self. I’d have to change completely. I want to be successful in my own right, not just be dependent on someone else all the time.” Her voice broke slightly. “I’m very flattered, er, James. I just think I’m too — well, too independent-minded. I wouldn’t want to have to lose me.” She looked up at me, her eyes sad. I took her hands in mine. I didn’t believe her for a moment.

“I’m sorry to hear that, Toni. Because I think you’d be brilliant at this, and I think you maybe don’t know exactly what it involves.” I shifted closer along the sofa towards her, keeping her hands grasped in mine.

“Can you tell me what ideas you have, what you’re working on to be successful?” I stroked her hand, heard her tiny gasp.