Perfectly Obsessed (6 page)

Chapter Four

I’m sure it should have taken longer than three hours to arrive here and maybe it would have if Drake didn’t put his foot down for majority of the journey. He didn’t even stop at the hotel to pick our stuff up, he said we’d get new. Arriving in London in the darkest of night will forever stay in my memories. The shift in buildings and roads compared to the town I grew up in was still alight and busy with people who should have been sleeping. A transformation that had begun the night I met Drake intensified the deeper into London we got. A buzzing excitement ran through me knowing I was about to step into Drake’s world and begin our journey together.

His flat is very small consisting of one bedroom, a very small box like living room, a bathroom with a shower cubical instead of a bath tub and a kitchen with only three units in it. Yet the place is meticulously clean and tidy. The furniture is new and simple. Nothing about the place feels lived in, then again he was in prison and then has spent the last couple of months with me. He didn’t give me long to acquaint myself with the place before taking my hand and showing me the bedroom and that is where we stayed till this moment.

“You’re quiet,” he murmurs, pulling the blanket higher around us.

“I’m just trying to take in everything that has happened,” I say, snuggling deeper against him.

“Do you regret coming here?”

“No,” I reply instantly, “I don’t know what’s in store for us but I know it’s better than staying there,” I tell him.

“Tell me about them, what did they do to you?” he asks.

I have never spoke to anyone about how my home life has made me feel, Lorna knew but only because she saw first-hand what it was like. Most of the time I didn’t think it was that bad, only when I needed reassurance I was loved. They were the moments when I received nothing that I felt the worst. 

“They have never said the words but I was the mistake baby they never planned to have. Adam and Mark were all they wanted to have, I came along and ruined all their plans. The boys were at an age where my parents could start planning what they wanted but then they had me and when the boys grew up and left home, instead of gallivanting off on holidays they were still stuck bringing me up. My father never hid his frustration with me, he hated that I wasn’t a boy, he hated that I’ve chosen what I want to do no matter what he says. It’s funny because they didn’t have to say anything to make me feel like I was the outsider, it’s the way they were with me.”

“Sounds about right,” Drake mutters, breathlessly.

I lean up on my elbow to see he is straining to keep his mouth shut, the pulse in jaw beating exaggeratedly.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“It is so fucking wrong how they treated you like that just because you weren’t planned. They should be proud to have such a beautiful daughter.”

The fierceness in his voice startles me for a brief moment and when he looks me in the eye I can see the fury that I have been treated in this way.

“I used to get sad about it but I got over it a long time ago, and now I have you, that’s all I need,” I promise him, meaning every word.

“I was only at your parent’s house for a short time but in that time I counted eighteen framed photos of your brothers in the dining room alone, I didn’t see a single photo of you until I was waiting in the hall for you to finish packing and then I only saw one. They can go fuck themselves now I’ve got you, I’ll make sure you have everything. You’ll never have to feel like that again, I fucking swear it to you.”

I push away the bad feelings and brush my lips across his chest. “I believe you,” I whisper, making my way up to his jaw.

Apart from telling him my likes, dislikes and embarrassing tales from school and crazy times with Lorna, there isn’t anything left to tell him about my family so I mentally lock that part of my life in a steel box and push it to the back of mind.

This is my new beginning and I don’t want bad reminders ruining it.

“So, what’s the plan now we’re here?” I ask, focusing on the future instead of the past.

“Why do we have to have a plan?” he asks in answer.

“How we will know what to do next?”

I’ve always had a plan to my life, the thought of not having one scares the hell out of me.

He laughs and then replies, “We don’t, we’ll go with the flow and see where we end up.”

“As much as that sounds like fun, I need to find a job. I didn’t manage to pack much and I need more clothes.”

“And you’ll get them but you don’t need a job, when I say I’ll take care of you I mean what I say,” he says, seriously.

“I know you will but I have always made my own money, you give me everything I need by being with me, I don’t need your money.”

“I’m not going to argue about it, it’s my job to look after you and I will. End of.”

I choose not to press the issue any more at the moment, but we will be revisiting this conversation. I like the idea of being taken care of but I don’t want to be completely dependent on him. I would end up being my mother and that is one thing I have strived not to be.

“Okay, I do seriously need some more clothes, it’s getting colder now and I didn’t pack any jeans or jumpers,” I tell him.

“Anything you want,” he smiles, his body relaxing beside me.

My stomach rumbles and Drake’s follows suit seconds after.

“It sounds like we missed breakfast,” I giggle.

“Get dressed, I’ll take you out to eat.”

By breakfast I meant brunch looking at the time. It was already after eleven by the time we walked into the café just up the road from Drake’s flat.

As soon as the bell dings above the door all heads turn to stare at us. None of them look overly friendly, all looking like we’ve walked in on something we shouldn’t have. Drake leads us to a table near the back by the kitchen and when we’re seated opposite each other, I see him nodding at people behind me.

I glance over my shoulder to see the people I thought were unkind are in fact known to Drake. It wasn’t him they were staring at, it was me.

“Hello handsome, when did you get back?”

My eyes follow the voice and see an aging woman making her way over to us grinning maternally from ear to ear.

Drake looks over his shoulder and he smiles warmly back at her.

“Hey, Marg. Got in late last night,” he tells her.

“What’s kept you away so long?” she asks, flickering quick glimpses to me.

She is the first person I have seen Drake be relaxed around, not that we have spent much time around other people when we have been together.

Her bright red hair is tied back in a bun and her face shows many years’ worth of laughter lines. The affection she holds for Drake is evident in the way she is looking at him and I already know I will like her.

“Marg, this is Cammie. Cammie, this is Marg. I’ve known her all my life and she is the one woman I know who can make a fully grown man cry just with her mouth,” he chuckles after he has introduced us.

“I’m not that bad lovey, it’s nice to meet you. Are you staying with our Drake?” she asks, turning her attention to me.

“She is, make it known. Excuse me, I’ll be back in a minute,” Drake answers for me.

He keeps looking over my shoulder and to someone at the window looking in.

He stands and heads out leaving me with Marg who hasn’t took her eyes off me.

I am desperate to squirm in my chair under her heavy stare but I stay still and return her stare.

“Drake is like a son to me and believe me, I’m about to run a risk of being cut out of his life if he thinks I’m trying to come between you, so I don’t say this lightly. If you’re in trouble and think Drake is your answer to your problems then you should go now because I won’t let you use him, do you hear me?”

Her voice has dropped to freezing from the warm tone she used with Drake and instead of being intimidated by her, I am furious.

“How dare you,” I snap, “I’m not with Drake because I need him to help me, I’m with him because I want to be, not that it is any of your business. Don’t presume to know me because you don’t.”

Her head tilts to the side and her scrutinizing delves deeper. It’s like she is trying to see into my soul.

“As long as it stays that way, he’s never brought a girl around before so this is a big thing him bringing you here. By the time you leave, everyone will know Drake has someone important in his life, he’s making a statement right now and it will make him more dangerous because he has you to protect.”

I listen to every word she is saying but I don’t understand. A statement? More dangerous? Who the hell would I have to be protected from?

Before I can ask, she stands and straightens her apron.

“A full English breakfast you said?” she says, jotting it down on her order pad even though I haven’t chosen what I want yet.

“I’ll have the same,” Drake says, taking his seat back at the table.

“What drinks can I get you both?”

“Coffee please,” I say.

“Make that two,” Drake adds.

Marg gives me one last look before she scuttles back behind the counter to give the greasy looking cook our order and makes a fresh pot of coffee.

“Sorry about that, I just had to speak with an old friend,” Drake says, pulling me back to him.

After Marg’s warning the whole place around me feels more dark and dirty. Drake looks darker. Since I’ve known him I felt a sense of danger around him, but because it wasn’t directed towards me I didn’t think twice about it. I put it down to his confidence and not worrying about what people think of him. It is what drew me to him in the first place, apart from his very good looks. Now, I’m starting to think there is much more to Drake Deveroux than I originally thought.

“What did she say while I was gone?” he asks.

“Nothing,” I burst out.

My reply is too fast and even to my ears sounds like a lie.

“The only thing I need from you apart from you, is you not to lie to me. I have enough with back stabbers, I can’t deal if you lie to me too.”

“Fair enough,” I sigh, “But, when I tell you things I need to know you won’t do something if I tell you I’m okay even if you think I’m not,” I add, remembering Marg fearing he will cut her out of his life.

I may not have liked her interference but she seems important to Drake and I don’t want him losing her because of me tattling on her when she was trying to look out for him.

“Okay,” he answers, looking confused by my request.

“And I think when we get back to your place you need to tell me more about yourself,” I add.

“What did she say to you?”

He is getting upset, the reverse of the anger I expected from the way Marg was talking.

“She just wanted to make sure I wasn’t using you to keep myself out of trouble. That me staying with you will make you more dangerous because you have me to protect and how everyone will know we’re together by the time we leave here.”

I want to ask all my questions here and now, but from the way his leg is bouncing up and down under the table and his finger is tapping the table top I can wait till we get back to his place.

While I wait for him to speak, I see control covering his face but underneath I think I see pain.

“I haven’t lied to you once, the first night I met you properly I told you I was fresh out of prison and I also told you I wasn’t a good person. You stayed knowing that, are you going to stay long enough to hear me out now you’ve got God knows what running through your head?” he asks.

“As long as you’re honest with me, I will.”

Relief washes over him and his head snaps to Marg who is making her way over with our drinks.

I reach across the table and put my hand over his, stopping his fingers from the constant tapping.

“Remember, I’m fine with her so you don’t need to say anything,” I remind him, knowing what he gets like when someone gets on the wrong side of me.

“Here’s your coffees,” she smiles, placing them in front of us.

“Have you been by to see your mum yet?” she asks him.

He quickly looks at me when my ears prick up at the mention of his family.

I remember him telling my mother that he visits his mum every week when he is home.

“Not yet,” he says curtly, not looking at her.

“They’ve cleaned the place up, it’s about time they did…”

“I’ll stop by later,” he cuts her off.

She senses the tension coiling off of him and shoots me a knowing look before leaving us.

“I know you’re dying to ask me everything, let’s eat then I’ll take you on a trip down the Deveroux life story road, okay?”

I get that he doesn’t want to talk about his personal life in here so I smile and add sugar to my coffee.

I wasn’t expecting to be standing at a graveside today or anytime soon, but as the sun tried to peek around a cloud and shine down on our part of the world I stood beside Drake and held his hand as he looked down at his mother’s grave.