Perilous Light

Perilous Light

By Alyssa Rose Ivy

Smashwords Edition

Copyright © 2012 Alyssa Rose Ivy

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return it to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thanks you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Cover Design: Phatpuppyart.com

To Mom, who I never had to search for because you were always there.

Acknowledgements

This book would not have been possible without the support of my family. Special thanks to Grant for the endless encouragement and enthusiasm. Thanks to Lillian and Samuel for being the best daughter and son a mother could ask for.

Big thanks to Lynn O’Dell for another fantastic editing experience and to Claudia of Phatpuppy Art for the gorgeous cover design.

Finally I would like to thank all of my readers for taking a chance on a new author.

Chapter One

Charlotte

I wasn’t sure when coffee went from an infrequent indulgence to an addiction, but at some point, it became my only line of defense against the sleepless nights. I spotted Liam sitting at our usual table the moment I walked into the coffee shop. No matter how early I arrived, he was always the first one there. Wearing his College of Charleston hoodie, he was partially blocked by the pile of books next to him on the corner table. He glanced up from the book he was reading as I pulled out the chair across from him. I hesitated for a moment before sitting down, hating the look of concern in his eyes.

“
Hey, Charlotte. How are you?” Putting his book down, he pushed a caramel mocha over to me.

I gave him my standard answer. “I’m fine. Thanks for the coffee.”

Liam studied me with a serious expression. He was worried, as usual. I couldn’t blame him; he took the brunt of my emotional breakdowns. He looked tired, and his auburn hair was all rumpled. I hoped the evidence of stress in his eyes came from schoolwork and not me.

“
I assume since you haven’t called, you’ve been sleeping?” He watched me carefully as I sipped my drink.

Ugh. My stomach churned with embarrassment as I remembered my latest breakdown. “Yeah, I’ve been fine. You really don’t need to worry.”

“
Hey, when you stop sitting up crying all night, I’ll stop worrying.” Liam smiled to let me know he was kidding, but I sensed his words contained more than humor.

“
Or we could just not Skype at one a.m.”

He laughed lightly. “Well since you live so far away, how else can we keep in touch?”

I hesitated before answering. Even though I never voiced my concern, I worried that he’d decided to stay local for college because he felt bad leaving me behind. Liam claimed he never saw a reason to leave Charleston, so I had let it go. “Yeah, that half-mile is practically like living in different countries, right?” I relaxed back into my chair, pulling on the sleeves of my sweater until they covered my hands.

Liam broke into a huge smile, the kind of smile that lit up his entire face. He was always most comfortable when we were joking. “Yeah, sometimes the time change still messes me up.”

I enjoyed the lighter conversation and recognized that keeping the topic off of me would help preserve it. “So, how are you doing?”

“
Pretty good. I’m glad that I finish up finals this week. I am
so
ready for break.” Liam stretched, locking his hands together behind his head.

“
Lucky you. I still have a few more weeks of school to go.” As welcome a distraction as school could be, I still needed the break.

“
Hey, I put in my high school years. I can’t help it that you have a year and a half left.”

“
Sure, sure… like you can’t speed up time.” I smiled naturally, and it felt good. So often, I put on fake smiles to pacify my friends and family, but with Liam, I usually didn’t have to.

Liam laughed. “So finding a hidden world wasn’t enough for you? Now all your friends are supposed to have superpowers? Besides, you’re the one who’s supposed to be all powerful,” Liam whispered, leaning across the table. He probably didn’t need to whisper. If someone overheard us, they would have thought we were talking about some roleplaying game or something.

“
Yeah, well, I don’t think my abilities work outside of Energo, and I haven’t heard of an Essence manipulating time.”

“
Well, if anyone can do it, it would be you.” Liam raised an eyebrow, making me wonder if he actually believed that.

“
I guess we’ll have to wait until we’re back in Energo to find out.”

“
Do you think we’ll go back soon? It’s been over a year already.” He tried to ask delicately, probably understanding how painfully aware I was of the time passing. It had been 368 days, not that I was counting.

“
I have no clue. I keep expecting to hear something, but it’s been silent. I’m trying not to worry about it.” I was sure Liam could see through my façade. Not a single day passed that I didn’t worry about it. I would have thought the separation would have grown easier, but no matter how hard I tried to move on with my life, Calvin was always in my thoughts. All attempts at convincing myself that my feelings for him were fake failed miserably. I realized pretty quickly that trying to live a delusion was pointless. I was completely in love with Calvin, and no amount of distance or time could change that. One part of me was excited to be closer to Calvin and to find my mom, but I was also terrified of how much more I might hurt. Maybe returning to Energo would make me ache for Calvin even more. Although I never admitted it aloud, I was also scared that James was wrong—maybe my mother was dead. I shook my head to clear my thoughts.

Liam gave me a half-smile. He knew how I really felt, but he didn’t call me on it. He thankfully changed the subject to a much happier one. “Yeah, well, I guess there’s no reason to dwell on it. Right now, I’m just really excited to go up to North Carolina to see Kevin play.”

“
Me, too! I’m already working on a bunch of signs and banners for us.” I pushed the darker thoughts away and let myself get excited.

“
Count me in. It’s weird enough watching him play on ESPN; it will be even crazier to see him in person at the arena.” Liam’s face became animated as he discussed my brother’s college basketball career. He was obviously really happy for him.

“
Monty is ridiculously excited. You should have seen his face when I asked to go to Chapel Hill as my birthday present this year.”

“
Oh, I know. I’m sure he can’t wait to get back to his Alma Mater. He hasn’t been back to see a game in years, has he?”

“
Nope. I’m sure he’s about to burst with nostalgia.” I might have made fun of him for it, but it was good to see my uncle excited about something. He had been a bundle of nerves ever since he found out that my mom was alive and being held prisoner.

We talked about the trip to Chapel Hill for another hour or so before I said goodbye and told him I’d see him on Saturday bright and early for our drive up to North Carolina. Liam tried to give me a ride home, but I could tell that he wanted to stay and study so I assured him the short walk home wouldn’t kill me.

***

The cool air hit me as soon as I walked outside. I briefly considered turning around to take Liam up on the offer of a ride, but ultimately decided the fresh air might help clear my head. Talking about Energo with Liam was a mistake—I couldn’t stop thinking about Calvin. I should have been angry with him. I
needed
to be angry with him, but what little anger I could muster paled next to my other emotions. More than anything, I hurt. Being away from Calvin went against everything my body and heart wanted. I didn’t know how much of the intensity came from the supernatural element of our bond, but recognized that at least some of my feelings had nothing to do with being the Essence. I constantly wondered what our separation felt like to him. I understood that it had to hurt him on some level, but I wondered if he felt anything
real
.

The hardest part was knowing how easily I could end the separation. All I had to do was go back to Energo, and I would be in Calvin’s arms in a few hours. I dreamed about it all the time. Sometimes the dreams were so real, I’d wake up and cry after discovering he wasn’t there. Of course, it really wouldn’t have been that easy. Taking that one step through the wrought iron gate meant turning on my family and probably my only chance of saving my mother. I couldn’t do it. Besides, even if I tried, someone would stop me before I could step through.

I hadn’t been walking long when the roar of James’s car announced his approach. “Need a lift?”

“
What are you doing here?” I asked, even though I wasn’t remotely surprised to see him. He always seemed to be around. As one of my Guardians, his job was to protect me, but James took his job very seriously. Between sharing all our classes, the countless afternoons we spent together while Henry and Monty were at practice, and the frequent social outings we attended, it sometimes seemed as though James and I were never apart. I didn’t really know how I felt about that. He could be incredibly annoying, but he also did a great job of keeping my mind off of Calvin.

James gave me his usual sarcastic smirk. “I’m only doing my job. It’s getting dark; you probably shouldn’t be walking home alone.” Listening to James talk about the dangers of walking home alone at night reminded me of the time he’d walked me home from a party our sophomore year. That was the night I first entered Energo and changed my life forever. That was the night I met Calvin. I closed my eyes momentarily, trying to push away the thoughts of Calvin before I got upset. I opened the passenger door and slid in, enjoying the warmth of the car. Even in Charleston, December could be cold. James pulled away from the curb as soon as I finished buckling my seatbelt. Even though I would never willingly admit it to James, driving around in an Aston Martin was pretty cool.

“
How was your coffee date?”

“
I had fun
hanging out
with Liam,” I snapped. I was overwhelmed enough with my feelings for Calvin, I didn’t need James trying to make me feel guilty about spending time with Liam.

James laughed. “Okay, fine. I already know you were only there to fuel your coffee addiction. It isn’t healthy, you know.”

“
I’m not addicted to coffee.” I wasn’t about to admit my weakness to James.

Thankfully, we passed the rest of the two-minute drive in silence. James parked the car in my driveway. “I have another birthday gift for you.” His eyes danced with excitement as he ran his hands through his dirty blond hair. He had let his hair grow out, and he seemed more comfortable. I think he enjoyed no longer having to pretend to be someone else.

“
Another?” Turning toward him, I let the door I had just pushed open close again. Over the past few weeks, James had given me a bunch of gifts. He handed me an envelope. I opened it slowly, not sure what to expect. “Wow, seriously?” I eyed the two tickets. “You got Kiev tickets? But wait…” My excitement waned as I realized the tickets were for a small venue I had never been to because it was strictly eighteen and up.

“
What?” James asked with the barest hint of a smile.

“
I can’t get in there. I’m underage, and unlike you, I don’t have a fake ID.”

“
You don’t?” James grinned as he slid something into my palm.

I looked down to see a South Carolina driver’s license with someone else’s name. “You got me a fake ID?” I wasn’t really surprised. James might take his role of Guardian seriously, but he never really understood or cared about a lot of the laws in my world.

“
Of course I did. It wasn’t exactly difficult. So we should be all set for Friday night. In case you were wondering, the second ticket is for me.”

“
Yeah, I figured that much. But James, do you realize how much trouble I’ll get in if I get caught?”