Playing the Field: A Diamonds and Dugouts Novel (30 page)

Her friend got quiet and thoughtful. “I hear you, Sonny. I was merely asking on the off chance that he did have a valid reason for not making the game.”

Why did Janie have to go and be pragmatic all of a sudden? She was pregnant. It was her God-given right to be irrational as hell. “Even if he did have a valid reason—and I’m not saying that he did. But even if he did it wouldn’t matter. I don’t want to live my life under a spotlight.” She didn’t want to be judged by a world of strangers.

“Okay.” Her friend decided not to push the subject. “How is Charlie holding up?”

Restless suddenly, Sonny hopped out of her chair and went to look for dishes to wash by hand. It was a great outlet for her nervous energy. “He’s still upset, last I knew. You know, I think he called him the other day.”

Janie’s aqua eyes grew big and round. “Really? Why do you say that?”

A plate was in the sink and she went to work on it. “I couldn’t find my phone the other day and then when I went looking for it, he had it. And JP’s number was in the outgoing calls log.”

“Do you think that he misses him?”

Absolutely. And it pissed her off. Her boy had really cared for JP. “I think so. He hasn’t said anything, but he’s started using the mitt he gave him again.”

A loud thump came from the far side of the living room. “Speaking of boys. I think Michael and Charlie found the old mini-trampoline.”

Earlier, after Janie had arrived with Michael, her boy had asked to play with the small trampoline outside. He’d mentioned something about it and water balloons. As long as it went down outside, she’d told them to have at it. By the sound that just came from the living room the boys couldn’t wait for outside.

Janie started to push out of the chair and Sonny stopped her. “Stay. I’ll get this.”

Leaving her friend in the kitchen, Sonny found the boys jumping on the trampoline. “I told you that you had to play with it outside, Charlie. I didn’t mean right here in the house. You two boys need to take it where it belongs before I change my mind about letting you use it.”

Unwilling to risk it, Charlie grabbed one end of it, apologizing. “I’m sorry, Mom. We just wanted to see how high we could go.”

“That’s fine, but you need to do it in the yard where there’s space.” She did not want to be replacing anything.

“All right.” The boys lifted the metal frame and began carrying it toward the door. A foot or two from the door they set it down and Charlie said, “There’s a Rush game on in a little while. Will you come get me before it starts?”

Sonny cocked her head to the side and studied her boy, instincts on sudden alert. This was new. “You want to watch, buddy?”

Charlie brushed hair out of his eyes and shrugged, “Why not?”

Umm, because JP was a jerk and he didn’t like him anymore? “Just asking. I’ll let you know when it starts.”

Returning to the kitchen, she found Janie holding her phone. Her friend looked up, mild amusement in her pretty eyes. “You got a text.”

Sonny sat back down and reached for the cell. “Why is that so newsworthy?”

The brunette handed it over. “Because it was from JP.”

Her hand froze in midair. “What?”

Janie waggled the phone. “You heard me. The text came from JP.”

Bracing herself with a deep breath, Sonny took the phone and opened the message. It read simply:

Don’t argue. Just watch the game with Charlie.

What the heck?

Frowning even though her heart had started pounding the minute Janie had told her who the text was from, Sonny handed the phone over for her friend to see. “What do you make of that?” More importantly, why should she care?

She was still so angry at him for what he’d done. And yes, she could admit that there’d been a part of her that had panicked and looked for an excuse to shut things down. Oh, all right. A big part had.

But he’d been way more wrong than her.

Janie snagged her attention. “I think we should watch the game.”

The clock on the wall said that they had twenty minutes until it started. “Why? What’s the point?”

Janie gave her a look like, “Duh” and replied, “To find out what he’s up to.”

Yeah, that might be a good idea. She was about to say so when something occurred to her. “I wonder how he was able to text down on the field so close to the game starting.”

Janie tapped the table with a hand, making a soft, sharp rap. “Another reason to watch!” she declared with a bright chirpy smile.

Okay, fine. She would watch, but she sure as hell wasn’t in the mood to forgive him. He didn’t deserve it.

Moving into the living room, Sonny turned on the television and found the channel. There were still a few minutes before the game started, so Sonny decided to make something to drink.

She turned to her friend who had curled up on the couch with a pillow between her legs for support and asked, “Do you want something to drink? Maybe some tea?” As soon as the words were out she thought of the first night she and JP had been together after she’d invited him to stay and have a drink.

A small ache surrounded her heart. Maybe she missed him a little bit. But only a little, and certainly not enough to try a relationship with him again. She didn’t want to put Charlie through that. Being the kid of a single parent could be tough enough at times. Trading that for a life in the public eye wouldn’t be any easier. Her boy deserved more than that.

But what about you?
her heart whispered.
What do you deserve?

Something that just wasn’t meant to be.

Looking radiant from pregnancy, Janie smiled appreciatively and arched her back to momentarily ease the strain. “That would be great. I’ll take chamomile if you have it.”

Of course she had chamomile. It was a staple. “I’ll be right back.”

In the kitchen alone, Sonny let down her guard some and sighed wearily. Now she was about to watch him play baseball on the tube. It made her jittery with nerves and anticipation. She wasn’t sure how she was going to feel, seeing him for the first time since their fight.

Why did he want them to watch the game?

Through the windows over the sink she could make out her son and Michael using the trampoline to try to reach a branch on the large maple nearby. They weren’t doing such a good job, but she figured the fun was in the process and not the end product. She sent a brief prayer to the universe that nobody broke anything. But the game was about to start.

Rapping her knuckles on the window to get their attention, Sonny pointed to the living room once they’d looked her way. The boys shared a smile and raced to toward the house. Satisfied they wouldn’t miss anything, she turned back to making tea.

The kettle had just finished heating and the tea was brewing in cups when she heard Janie call out, “You need to get in here, Sonny. The game is about to start.”

Excitement that she didn’t want to admit she felt jangled her nerves and made her hurry. Why did he want her and Charlie to watch the game? What could he possibly do that would matter or make a difference?

Trying so hard to cling to her anger at the shortstop, Sonny squeezed the honey bear fiercely and dumped way too much into a cup. “That’ll just be mine,” she muttered quietly and eased up on the poor plastic bear. So many emotions had gone through her the past few weeks. Everything from anger to depression to outrage had taken up temporary residence at one time or another. Other feelings like sadness and heart break she’d tried her best to hide from. She’d told herself she was doing it for Charlie. He needed her to be strong.

But the truth was she was hiding from herself. Because if she acknowledged how much she hurt, then she had to admit how much JP mattered. And if he mattered, and she couldn’t be with him, then the pain would be too much to bear. She was better off shutting down.

How could somebody so perfect, so strong and reliable, turn right around and do something so thoughtless? She just didn’t get it.

Charlie ran into the kitchen, startling her. “Me and Michael want drinks.” If she wasn’t mistaken, her boy had an extra spring in his step all of a sudden. It couldn’t be because they were about to watch JP, could it?

She decided to ask. “Hey there, kiddo. You look awful chipper. Any particular reason?”

Her boy shrugged his shoulders. “I’m just excited to watch the game. That’s all.”

Sonny set down the tea mugs. “I thought you didn’t want to see JP anymore after him not making it to your game.” That was correct, wasn’t it? Or had he thrown a change-up and felt differently and she just hadn’t noticed because she was too wrapped up in her own inner drama?

Probably.

Charlie raided the fridge for drinks. “I’m getting over it.”

Well now, how very mature. She wished she could say the same. “I’m glad, honey.”

Coming back out with his arms loaded, he kicked the refrigerator closed with a grunt. “Can we have popcorn too, Mom?”

She didn’t see why not. “Sure, babe. You finish getting the drinks and I’ll make it.”

Her son flashed her a grin. “Thanks, Mom. You’re the best!”

She tried like hell to be. “You too, big C.” Walking over to her boy, she dropped a kiss on his head. “We’re a good pair.”

And they were going to stay that way. Just the two of them. That’s the way it was meant to be.

Michael poked his head into the kitchen, searching for her son. When he spotted him, the fifth grader beckoned. “Hurry up already, Charlie. The game’s about to start.”

The two of them took off and Sonny busied herself with the popcorn. By the time it was done and she had it in a large bowl, the game was under way. It took some finesse, but she managed to carry the bowl and both mugs of tea out to the living room.

The boys had taken up residence on the floor in front of the television. As soon as she got close enough, Charlie grabbed the bowl and filled his hand with popcorn. “Thanks,” he said, his eyes already glued to the screen.

Finding a spot next to Janie, Sonny handed her the tea and sat. She tucked her bare feet underneath her and took a sip. Her lips puckered and she cringed. Wow, that was sweet.

On the screen the Rush put down two outs almost immediately, Peter burning up the field with red-hot pitches. The camera flashed over JP out at shortstop and Sonny’s heart climbed into her throat. There he was, gorgeous and intense out on the field, his ball cap pulled low over his eyes.

Emotions slammed into her as she watched him catch a grounder and sail it off toward first for the third out. She hadn’t expected seeing him to make her feel like this. But she felt like she’d just been sucker-punched in the stomach.

Was that why he’d wanted her to watch? So that she’d feel bad?

Charlie turned his head and looked at her over his shoulder, bare feet crossed at the ankle and bent up behind him. Though his eyes were a little sulky, she could see that he was feeling conflicted just like her. “Did you see the way JP got in front of the ball, Mom? I’ve been working on that at practice.”

“That’s good.” It was hard to yank her gaze from the flat screen. They’d just shown a shot of JP’s butt as he jogged off the field.

Janie made a little hum in her throat. “Dang, Sonny,” she drawled with appreciation.

True that.

First up to bat was JP and it seemed like everyone in the room tensed up with anticipation. The announcers went on and on about his batting average this season and other significant stats that she tuned out while he warmed up. She just ogled JP, eating up the sight of him. Something changed in the way they were speaking and she tuned back in.

Just in time too.

The announcers on the television said as JP stepped on to the field and headed for the batter’s box, “And would you listen to that everybody? JP Trudeau has a new walkout song. The shortstop has used the same song religiously since the minors. I wonder what spurred this decision.” The announcer paused and then added, “You tell me, folks, if Trudeau has made a mistake and this will affect his performance for the remainder of the season.”

The sound rose and suddenly Charlie leapt to his feet and exclaimed, pointing at the
TV
, “That’s my song! That’s my song!”

Sure enough, her son’s favorite song, “Tonight Tonight” by Hot Chelle Rae was blaring through the stadium speakers. As JP walked toward the plate the boy band rocked their little pop music hearts out, singing about there being a party on the roof top, top of the world.

Halfway to the mound, JP stopped and started dancing, mimicking the way she’d been dancing the night he’d walked in on her. Then he pointed to the Jumbotron just as the announcer cut in, “Would you look at that, folks? The shortstop is clearly sending a message.”

Charlie was dancing in front of the
TV
along with JP until the Jumbotron came on the screen. Then he stopped and yelled, “Mom! Mom, look!” pointing at it.

Sonny leaned to the side and looked around her son, her pulse racing and her stomach doing jumping jacks. When she saw what was on the giant screen her heart opened wide up and she started to cry. It read in red, flashing letters:

Sorry, Charlie. This one’s for you.

Janie gasped. “Oh my God, Sonny. Do you see that?”

She did. She so did.

The announcer cut in again. “Whoever Charlie is, they must be extremely special to the shortstop for him to pull this kind of stunt.” Another pause. “And will you look at the crowd? They’re going nuts out there, imitating Trudeau’s moves.”

They were too. JP had stopped shaking it and was walking the rest of the way to the plate, but the crowd was having a grand time rocking out to the teenybopper song, ignoring the game. Because, as the song said, whatever—it didn’t matter.

The camera zoomed a close-up on JP’s face and he looked directly into it, his eyes penetrating and intense. Then he held up a hand, palm facing out, and she could see writing on it. The camera focused further until the words became clear. Sonny read them and had to choke back tears. On his hand in black marker was written:

I need sunshine.

The man was very obviously sending her a message. And it was most definitely received. Sonny felt it clear down to her toes. It vibrated inside her.