He hated himself at that instant, hated his weakness, hated the reality that the woman he’d loved had died instead of him. He was such a bastard.
He stepped into the shower before the water heated, letting the cold pound down on his aching body. Grabbing the bar of soap, he scrubbed like the devil.
When Andie just stared pointedly at her, she wiped harder.
“Mary Ann okay?” Ramon asked as he came in from the back room.
Macey stopped what she was doing. “Mary Ann?”
“The car. Only woman I’ve got right now.” He cocked a suggestive eyebrow toward Andie, who scowled at him.
“Mary Ann’s fine. Thanks for letting me use it—her.” Macey attempted a smile. “I like the name.”
“So glad the
car
is okay,” Andie said drily. “What’s with Derek?”
“Just a bad day.” Macey didn’t know if he’d told Andie anything about Julie, and wasn’t sure it was her place to share it.
“You’re acting strange. What happened?” Andie was watching her too carefully.
“Just worried about him.” That was personal enough. She wasn’t about to mention seeing him naked or her embarrassing reaction.
“Ramon, go wipe down the outside tables, would you?” Once he’d gone outside, Andie lowered her voice. “He’s like a puppy dog, following me around. I’ll never forgive you for hiring him.”
Macey chuckled. “He’s harmless.”
“Easy for you to say. Eager beavers are not my type.”
“What is your type?” she asked as they prepped the place for the evening rush.
“Don’t have a type. I like being on my own, account able to no one. I don’t stay in one place for long.”
“You’ve been here for a while, haven’t you?”
“A few weeks. I’m getting antsy.”
“Does Derek know you might up and leave any time?”
“I told him that when he hired me. But I’ll try to give you some warning so you can hire someone.”
“Add it to the list. I need about four more people already. I’m not getting enough response from the fliers or the sign in the window.”
“There was a guy in here earlier asking about a job. He managed a bar in Wisconsin. Down here for the summer, maybe more.”
“Did you get his name?”
Andie dug in the pocket of her jeans, which fit her like a second skin. She pulled out a business card and handed it to Macey. “I told him you’d call tomorrow.”
“Thanks. Did he set off any creep alarms?”
“No, but then my creep alarms may not be as sensitive as yours.”
Macey tucked the card into her pocket and turned to help the group that were stepping up to the bar, just as Derek appeared. The customers were studying one of the paper menus from the stack by the register, so she watched him walk over to the other register to run the report and clear out the drawer. He finally glanced her way and their eyes met. His jaw tightened and he looked away.
Nothing personal,
she reminded herself, though it was difficult not to take it that way. The woman in front of her started to order, so Macey had to put Derek out of her mind.
It wasn’t until many hours later that she was able to think about him again. She’d accepted a ride home from Andie on her motorcycle—a first for Macey—and barely managed to shed her sweaty clothes before withering into bed. The long shifts were exhausting enough, but the scene at Derek’s had taken a lot out of her, too.
He hadn’t spoken to her other than what was demanded by the job, but the bar had been the busiest she’d seen it and the receipts for the day confirmed that. There hadn’t been much chance to say anything, anyway. However, it hadn’t escaped her notice that he’d been simmering with anger the entire evening. He had no reason to be mad at her, she told herself yet again. He was the one who’d stripped down.
Don’t think about it anymore.
As she tried to go to sleep, she couldn’t shake the image of Derek’s naked body.
It was going to be a long night.
“Soon, if you keep walking in on me,” he mumbled to himself. It’d been a week since Julie’s birthday, the day he’d missed the first half of work. Macey had backed off after that. Either she sensed he needed to be alone or she was just preoccupied by all the hiring she’d done. She was taking over the bar piece by piece and, frankly, he was glad. It needed help and he couldn’t give it. All he could do was show up and pour drinks.
“What are you doing here?” he asked. “What time is it?”
“Seven-thirty. We’re going out.”
“We? Got a mouse in your pocket?” he asked as she crossed the living room and opened the blinds, letting in the bright sunlight. He could see, though, that there was no mouse in her pocket. There was nothing in her pocket. She wouldn’t be able to fit
anything
in the microscopic pocket of her microscopic shorts.
Since when did she look like
that?
he wondered, letting his eyes roam over the red top that showed off a strip of skin at her waist and bared most of her back. Macey had apparently come out of her shell sometime when he wasn’t looking.
“You are going to get up, take a shower and dress. I’ve brought coffee and doughnuts.”
“How about if you leave the coffee and doughnuts and go away.”
“Nice try, but you’re not scaring me off by being mean.”
“I thought that was a lot more polite than telling you to get the hell out.”
“Glad to see your thoughtfulness isn’t completely gone. Now.” She pointed toward his bedroom. “Why?”
“I’m taking you somewhere.”
“Where?”
“You’ll see when we get there.”
Derek sat back in the chair. “You may have noticed I’m not in the mood to play games lately.”
“This isn’t a game.”
“Then tell me what we’re doing.”
“If I tell you, will you get your butt in the shower?”
He didn’t want to think about the last time he’d gotten his butt in the shower with her here. “Yes.”
“A dolphin cruise.”
He stared, waiting for her to laugh and say she was joking. She crossed her arms and stared right back at him.
“Shower.”
“You’re kidding about the dolphin cruise, right?”
“Not in the least.”
“Macey. I have a bar to run.”
“Actually, I’ve kind of been running it for you, and I’ve scheduled people to cover until noon. They won’t let you in before that. Consider it an employee revolt.”
“What makes you think—”
“We made a deal, Derek. You can bark at me all you want later, but you’re not going to work until noon. You can either stay in your lonely condo and brood or you can come with me and shut me up.”
“That’ll be the day.” He stood but made no move toward his bedroom. Macey took his arm and tried pulling him in that direction. When she figured out she couldn’t budge him, her shoulders drooped.
“Will you do this for me, please?” she asked softly.
“Do what for you?”
“I want to see the dolphins. I haven’t had the chance to do anything fun or touristy since I’ve been here, and I just want to do this.”
“Why do you need me?” he asked suspiciously.
“Because I can’t watch dolphins all alone.”
He stared at her, sure she was playing him, but the look on her face was earnest and a little bit sad.
“Please?” she repeated.
He knew he’d been a terrible friend since she’d set foot on the island. He could do this one thing. Even if she was feeding him a line of crap. “You’re sure they’ve got the bar covered?”
“Andie’s there, Ramon’s there and so is Kevin the Great,” she said, referring to the newest hire, the veteran bar manager from up North. He was one of three more new hires Macey had made in the past week. “They’ll be fine and we’ll get there in time for the big lunch crowd.” She pegged him with those green eyes. “Trust me, Derek.”
He gritted his teeth and headed for the shower, muttering the whole way that he was a sucker and he knew it.
There must have been a dozen dolphins out there, just a few feet away. She’d seen them on TV and at zoos, but never in the wild. It was incredible to watch them so close, playing tag with the boat. Macey stole a glance at Derek and saw he was actually smiling. Such a small thing, that smile, but a huge step.
He looked down at her. “They’re amazing, aren’t they?”
Macey nodded and turned her attention back to the pod. The captain had stopped the engine and the boat was drifting in the bay, close to where it and the gulf joined. Other boats sped by, trailing monstrous wakes. A particularly large wave reached and rocked them, sending Macey crashing into Derek’s side.
“I told you to lay off the liquor,” he said as he put his arm around her to steady them both against the high railing.
Macey gasped. “Was that a funny? I didn’t know you still had it in you.”
“I take it back. Don’t know what came over me.” But he was smiling. And his arm remained at her waist, which made the moment all the more magical. Even if it was one-sided magic.
“You think we should call Andie?” Derek asked after the dolphins had swum away and he and Macey had taken their seats again. “What for?”
He shrugged. “To make sure everything’s okay.”
“Everything’s fine. And if it isn’t, what are you going to do? You’re on a boat in the middle of the bay.”
Derek bounced his knees up and down restlessly. “I’m not used to not being there.”
Macey squeezed his forearm gently. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Dare, but the beer will flow without you.”
He stared at her for several seconds and finally cracked another grin. They were going for a record today with the smiles. “When you put it like that, I sound like an idiot.”
Macey laughed. “You’re not an idiot. You’re dedicated to the bar just like you used to be dedicated to firefighting.”
He looked away, out over the side of the boat toward the mainland.
“Do you miss it?” Macey asked tentatively.
Derek shook his head. “I don’t think about it.”
“Maybe you should.”
His gaze penetrated hers. “Are you trying to ruin this?”
“You’re right. Forget I said anything. This has been fun. Next time I think we should try surfing or sand sculpture lessons.”
“You sound like a tourist brochure.”
“I am on vacation, technically.”
He chuckled. “Hate to tell you this, but most people don’t work a full-time job on vacation.”
“The bar is a fun job.”
He raised an eyebrow.
“You don’t enjoy it?”
“It passes the time.”
“That’s all? You spend sixteen hours a day there and it passes the time?”
“Like you said, it’s pouring beer and mixing liquor. Not something I always dreamed of doing.”
“But you do it for Gus.”
“Do I need a better reason?”
She shook her head. What he was saying just confirmed for Macey that he needed to get back to firefighting. He might not be ready yet, and that was fine, but she would do what she could to get him ready. Somehow.
They rode in silence the rest of the way back to the marina, engrossed in the sights and the captain’s entertaining narration. When they disembarked, Macey dragged him into the gift shop.
“This is all tourist crap, Mace.”
“Tourist crap happens to be exactly what I’m looking for.” She wanted a souvenir of the day. It was the first fun time she and Derek had actually spent together in years. She wanted to remember forever the magical feeling she’d had, with his arm around her, watching the dolphins.
“Here we go,” she said, picking out two plastic dolphin key chains.
“Charming,” Derek said when she held them up. “Last of the big spenders.”
“My boss doesn’t pay me enough.” She took the souvenirs to the counter to pay for them. Rejecting the paper bag the cashier offered her, she immediately started transferring her keys to one of the dolphins. Then she held out her hand to Derek. “Keys, please.”
“What? No. You’re not putting that thing on my keys.”
“I am. That way you won’t lose them. Hand ’em over.”
“I never lose them and I don’t want a goofy dolphin hanging from them.”
They arrived at her car and she unlocked the doors. “You really don’t remember how to have fun, do you?” she said as they climbed in. She would grab his keys later, when he wasn’t paying attention.
Derek scoffed. “I may be rusty but I feel confident saying a cheap plastic dolphin is not fun.”
“Old man.”
“Little girl. Next you’ll be collecting Hello Kitty.”
“I used to love Hello Kitty, thank you. Do you need to go home before heading to work?”
“I’m good. Let’s make sure they haven’t burned the place down.”
Macey parked along the street outside the bar. “Derek,” she said when he reached for the door handle.
He stopped and looked at her.
“Thanks for coming with me today. I loved it.”
The corners of his mouth tilted upward. “You are so full of it. That wasn’t for you at all.”
“What do you mean?” she asked innocently.
“I mean you did that to drag me out of my pathetic existence.”
“Me? I’d never do something like that.” She couldn’t keep from smiling herself. “Okay. Maybe a little. But I really was dying to see the dolphins. And I hate doing things like that alone.”
He hesitated for several seconds. “It was fun.” He said the words with such seriousness, as if it was a shameful confession.
“Next time we’re totally doing the sand-castle lessons.”
“Why would anyone want sand-castle lessons?”
“To learn how to build big, beautiful sand sculptures, of course.”
“You’re pushing your luck.”
“Yeah, well, I’ve gotten good at that. Come on. We’re late.”