Pretend With Me (Midnight Society #1) (4 page)

The male nurse showed us into a private room and as
soon as we entered, I walked over to the bed and sat
down. Moments later, Eric was at my side. It wasn’t a
minute after the nurse left when a young man in his late
twenties, entered the room. The name sewed onto his coat
declared that he was Dr. Ali. He was around 5’ 10” and his
hair was jet black. As he came closer I saw his eyes. It was
a beautiful light hazelnut color, but not as pretty as Eric’s
though. I gave myself a mental kick for that last thought.
“Good morning,” he smiled, flashing perfect rows of
white teeth, “Mr. Wilson and Miss,” he looked to me
questioning.
“Jen,” I said smiling back at him a little too friendly.
“Call me Eric,” Eric said at my side, and held out his
hand.
“Very well,” Dr. Ali said shaking his hand, and then it
was my turn. He held out his hand to me and with my left
hand I took it, but didn’t let go.
I looked to Eric smiling mischievously, and then I
turned back to the doctor in front of me. Without saying
anything, I pulled the doctor towards me and kissed him,
leaving Eric at my side watching. I could almost feel the
steam radiating from his skin. I pulled the doctor closer,
deepening the kiss and closed my eyes. The kiss only lasted
for a few seconds before I pulled away from the doctor,
grinning.
The doctor took a confused step back, away from me,
and then his eyes locked onto Eric’s. “Eric – Mr. Wilson I
am so –” he began, but stopped when Eric turned, sending
me daggers. I could almost feel his eyes burning a hole into
the middle of my head.
“Excuse us,” Eric said through his teeth, and without
another word the good doctor left the room, silently
shutting the door behind him. As soon as the door clicked
shut, Eric was standing in front of me. He had placed both
hands on the hospital bed, at my sides caging me in. I
didn't take my eyes off his. I was not backing down.
“So an annoying slut for a wife, is that it?” he asked
surprisingly calm.
“Goes well with an abusive husband, does it not?” I
countered, holding up my damaged wrist. “And besides
I’m not your wife Eric! We’re not even engaged,” I
sneered in his face.
“Really?”
“Well, it may have escaped your notice, spoiled rich
boy, but I hate you!” I spat at him. “Also if I didn’t
where’s the sign of commitment, other than the sprained
wrist of course?” I growled. I could feel my anger growing
with each second.
His face changed instantly, and suddenly he was now
staring at me with soft, kind eyes. What the fuck, was he
bipolar? “You don’t hate me Jen, just as I could never hate
you,” he whispered, frowning at me.
All of a sudden, he was no longer annoyed or angry
with me. Instead, it was like the first time we had met.
That one moment in the car, before all of this shit had
started. He raised his hands, and held my neck gently in it.
A part of me wanted to bat his hand away, but I couldn’t
bring myself to do it. It felt too good. His touch was
nothing like the doctor’s.
Already I could feel tiny electric shocks passing from
his skin to mine. I found that it drained away my irritation
and frustration at him, leaving me with a calm, peaceful
feeling. I closed my eyes, feeling light headed and pressed
my forehead into his chest, just for this small moment
enjoying the peace circling inside my body.
I hadn’t felt this at peace in a long time. Maybe just for
this moment, I could relax and enjoy it. Maybe for just a
second, it was okay to feel free and at peace with myself,
like what happened that night wasn’t my fault.
But it was
, I heard Daren’s voice in my head.
It is your
fault that I’m dead. I’m dead Jen, and you’re alive - you don’t deserve
to be happy or at peace.
He was right. What had happened to
Daren and Brandon was my fault. It was all because of me.
They had died and suffered, and I deserved to be in pain.
Reality struck me a second later like a bullet to the
stomach. My walls immediately went up, and I pulled
away from Eric, shoving him away from me. I didn’t want
this; I couldn’t let myself feel like this. It was wrong. I
didn’t deserve any peace of mind, I deserved to be
miserable.
“No Eric, I don’t hate you,” I said, staring up at his
face. “That would be an understatement.”
“Whatever!” he snapped at the edge of anger, and then
turned away from me, slamming the door behind him.
A second later the male nurse entered the room, staring
at the door Eric had just slammed. He shook his head,
thinking nothing of it and then turned to me smiling. “I’m
here to take you to get your hand x-rayed,” he announced.
I jumped off the bed, followed him out the room and into
a corridor.
“Can I ask you something?” I said, and he nodded
without looking at me. “Do you know the Wilsons?” I
wondered, thinking back to when Eric had mentioned his
name to the ER nurse.
“No, not personally, but I know of them. Everyone
knows of them.” I looked at him confused, and before I
could ask he began to explain. “They’re like one of the
wealthiest families in the world, I think. They own one of
the biggest pharmaceutical companies. Harper Wilson was
one of the world’s leading brain surgeon before he stopped
practicing. His wife does all sorts of side jobs, like with the
companies and stuff.”
My jaw dropped to the floor and my eyes bulged out of
their sockets. My mind went blank for a moment as I
thought about the attention we’d gotten once they’d heard
Eric’s name. “They’re really powerful and influential,
especially in the medical field,” he continued stopping at a
door marked x-ray. He shoved the door open for me, and
I forced a smile as I walked into the room.
About half an hour later, my arm was in a hard, white
cast, and I was walking out the hospital doors. Since I had
pissed Eric off, and he’d stormed out, I hadn’t seen him.
Just as I was about to dig out my phone and call someone
to get me, he pulled up in front of me. I stood staring at
the car for a long while, hating its driver and then,
reluctantly, got in.
As soon as I was in the car, he placed a white plastic
bag in my lap. It smelled delicious, and my belly growled in
response. I was abruptly aware that I hadn’t eaten
breakfast this morning. “No tomatoes or onions,” he said
turning to me. I opened the bag, pulling out a burger.
Confused, I looked to him.
“How did you know I hated tomatoes and onions?”
“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “Jen... I’m sorry for
hurting you. I’m not going to explain myself because what
I did was horrible. I told you that I didn't want you to hate
me... then I sent you to the ER. My actions are
unforgivable, and from now on, I swear that I will never
hit you again, no matter what happens or how badly we
fight...” Pain of regret and guilt was deep in his eyes, and I
could feel sadness leaking from him.
“I hit you too... twice,” I heard myself say.
“From the very beginning you’ve been saying how
much you hate me.”
“So that’s it then?” I asked, and his face morphed into
total confusion. “You’re not going to say ‘I know I don’t
deserve your forgiveness but I’m still asking’ nothing like
that?”
“No,” he shook his head, turning away from me.
“Damn it,” I said rolling my eyes at him. Of all the
boys, I had to be stuck with the one that apologized and
actually meant it. He turned back to me instantly. I
couldn't believe I was going to say this. “Eric, I forgive
you,” I whispered. “I believe you... but if you ever hit me
again I will stab you repeatedly with a kitchen knife in your
sleep.”
“You have my permission,” he muttered still glum.
“Do you still want to go to school?”
“No,” I shook my head. “Take me home.” He nodded
and without another word, drove out of the hospital.
Again the drive was silent. I took two bites of the burger
and then didn’t feel like eating anymore. Instead, I felt like
I had been run over by a steam roller.
Somewhere along the drive, I must have dozed off,
because sometime later I was waking up in my bed.
Afternoon sun bathed the room - the only time I could
stand the sun or enjoyed it. I got out my bed, and instantly
felt light headed. I started swaying on my feet, but before I
could fall, I grabbed onto the bed frame.
Slowly I began making my way to the door, and then
down the stairs. When I had reached exactly halfway down
my body began to protest. I was too tired and weak to go
on so instead I leaned against the wall for a moment,
taking deep breaths.
After a couple of minutes, I began walking again. That
was when Eric’s voice floated up towards me. “...she isn’t
the girl I was expecting...” he trailed off. I crept down the
remaining stairs and sat on the last one listening to his
voice. Even though it was pained, it was still his and
though I would never admit this, I liked his voice. “What
happened to her in Trinidad..? Why could she say that
she’s been through worst than rape and mean it?”
“I don’t know…” my mom said, and even from the
distance I could hear her voice trembling. “Jen’s never
talked about it… I’ve asked her… When she came home, I
sat with her, begging her for hours to tell me what
happened… all she’s ever said was that she couldn’t talk
about it.” My mom’s voice broke then, and she began
crying. Hearing just how much pain I was putting her
through, made my own heart ache. I knew what she
wanted; she wanted to comfort me and try to make things
better, but I couldn’t tell her the things that had happened
in Trinidad. It just wasn’t possible.
Not wanting them to continue talking about me, I
forced myself to stand following their voices to find them
in the kitchen. “Hey,” I greeted, walking into the room as
though I hadn’t been listening. Instantly, Eric straightened
himself from leaning against the fridge, and my mom
began wiping her cheeks with the palm of her hand.
“Jen!” my mom burst out instantly, her eyes staring at
my hand. “What happened?”
“Mrs. Carson,” Eric began turning to face her. “That’s
my-”
I didn’t know where it came from, but strength
suddenly burst through me. In a flash I closed the space
between Eric and I, shoving him towards the door. “I fell
down the stairs,” I sighed holding out my hand to her. My
mom walked up to me, studied the cast for a moment and
then looked at me shaking her head.
“Oh honey, again,” she sighed still shaking her head.
“You never learn, do you?” My mom then patted my head
briefly and left the kitchen, pretending she needed to do
something elsewhere. I knew it was only because she didn’t
want me to see her crying, so I pretended not to notice.
At my side Eric grabbed my good arm, and yanked me
to face him unexpectedly, making me stumble along
behind him. As soon as I was steady on my feet, I
snatched my hand back glaring at him hatefully. “What is
your problem?” I blurted out not being able to help
myself.
“Why did you do that?” he asked instead of answering
my question.
“Do what?” I was confused now.
“Cover for me,” he wondered. “Why not let me tell
your parents that I...” His voice slowly died, and I knew
that he was feeling sorry for himself again. Any moment
now a huge black rain cloud with thunder and lightning
would fly into the room and hover over his head.
I was silent for a moment considering whether I should
tell him the truth or lie to him. The fact was that I didn’t
know why I did it, I had just done it. “You were like a lost
puppy being kicked around. It was depressing,” I lied. “I
still despise you, it’s not like I had a change of heart or
anything.”
His face suddenly changed then, and he took a step
towards me, closing the already small space between us.
Instantly I felt the dry static that was becoming a little too
familiar fill the room, and before it could get any stronger,
I stepped back. Eric didn’t take the hint because instead of
stopping where he was, he kept slowly walking towards
me. With each step that brought him forward, I stepped
back and then suddenly my back slammed into something
cold and hard - the fridge, I realized. Now I could only
stand there and stare as he closed the distance between us.
He stopped inches away from me, and then raised his hand
to cup my face. I stiffened at once, not because I was
afraid that he was going to hit me again, but because I was
afraid of what his movements meant. He then reached out,
taking my good hand, holding it at our side. His eyes never
left mine.
“Jen,” he whispered, his breath washing over my skin.
Automatically I breathed his scent in, already feeling light
headed. “You don’t hate me... you may not love me yet,
but soon you will, I promise you,” he smirked, with over
confidence and arrogance that made me snap back to
reality. At once my eyes hardened.
“Loving someone and being attracted to them isn’t the
same thing Eric,” I snapped. A light suddenly began
shining in his eyes now. His face came alive in an instant as
a huge joker-like grin stretched across his lips. “Now what
are you happy about?”
“You just admitted you’re attracted to me,” he said
beaming like a clown.
I thought back and cursed myself mentally. Instantly I
ripped my hand from his, and slapped his other hand away
from my face. “Don’t get too excited,” I snapped, walking
out of the kitchen, leaving him standing there, staring after
me.
* * *

As soon as the bell rang, signaling the end of another
school day I stood up from my usual seat at the back of
the classroom, and bolted outside. The second I was in the
hallway I found myself surrounded by people, and the
constant jumbled sound of talking and laughter. It was an
instant reminder of just how alone I felt, and how hard
today had been - from the very second I had opened my
eyes this morning, right dow n to this moment.

All day I felt as though my throat was clogged up.
Every time I breathed, it was more of a chore than
something natural. It hurt to breathe - to do anything
really.

It was hard to walk around the school pretending that I
was okay, that I wasn’t breaking when in truth every step,
every move, every breath crushed me. I just wanted to
scream at the top of my lungs, to make someone see the
cracks and dark spots that littered my body. Right now
though, I’d settled for going home or better yet curling up
in a hidden, lonely corner and disappearing.