"I think we're done here," I say to her evenly, and take a step back to leave as she begins to sob openly.
"You don't understand," she starts to try and explain, but I'm not having it this time. I take a step towards her and cut her off before she can go on with her sob story.
"Lisa, quit with the whole 'woe is me' act, it insults my intelligence," I say to her as she wipes her eyes on the sleeve of her dress.
She looks at me through her tears and mascara smeared face and I can tell she is thinking of a way to regain control of the situation. I smile at her, copying her fake smile from earlier. "Now, I'm going to go back inside and enjoy the rest of my night. If you should so much as try to talk to me one more time, I promise it won't be as pleasant for you."
I turn to leave but hear her say in a tortured voice, "God, I wish you would have never come back here."
I stop and look back at her face to see that her mask is temporarily gone. In its place is a sad, defeated looking woman that is a small reminder of the girl I use to call my "sister" when we were such close friends.
"My parents use to always tell me that I should be more like you," she says frustrated between her sobs. She takes a deep breath before she elaborates further, "Nothing I ever did was good enough for them. So… I tried to be
you
instead. The good grades, the loving parents, and the perfect boyfriend."
For a brief second I actually feel sorry for her. I don't know how that is possible given all that she's said and done, but I do. I immediately put the lapse in judgment aside and look at her; really look at her, remembering every emotion I had been put through that night and since then. There is no way on earth that I'm letting her off the hook this easy.
"That's it? That's why you did all of this," I say calmly to her.
And she's back. The vindictive glint is back in her eyes as she wipes her face with her sleeve and juts out her chin at me. "Why couldn't you just stay away?"
"Didn't we already cover that," I almost shout, getting more exasperated by the minute at this conversation.
"All he's been talking about since you came back into town is how much he wishes that he never hooked up with me. That I'm a bitch. That you're 'the one' that got away," she says while using her fingers to air quote and emphasize "the one."
"Let me make this perfectly clear for you… you did me a favor. I wouldn't want Chris if you paid me. After everything I've seen so far, you two deserve each other."
"What the fuck does that mean," she replies back and then says just as quickly, "You still think you're better than me? Well, let me tell you something, Sabrina Chandler, you're still that same stupid little bitch."
She smiles and folds her arms across her chest, basking in the glory of her last statement. I smile back, throwing her off her game. "Is that all of it, Sybil? This is what was so important that you had to drag me out of there to listen to?"
She nods.
"Good, because I want to make sure you're totally done talking out of your ass before I tell you to go fuck yourself," and then throw the contents of my wineglass all over her face.
I turn on my heel as she's wiping her shocked face and run right into Tyler's chest.
She's close to shouting when she says, "How dare you?"
I glance up at Tyler who's grinning from ear to ear before I turn my head to look at Lisa one last time. I almost can hear the imaginary door being closed for good on our past. I'm feeling beyond exhilarated when Tyler's hand comes to rest on the small of my back and nudge me so that I start walking back to the entrance of the building.
At about the half way point he stops and turns to face me. He puts his hands in his pants pockets and is searching my face for any sign of residual distress.
"Are you okay?" He asks full of concern for me.
"I'm fine, I should have done that a long time ago," I say through a smile, "Thank you for looking out for me... again."
"Anytime," he chuckles and then pulls one of his hands out of pockets. He takes my chin in between his fingers until my face is tilted up towards his and says, "Didn't look like you needed any help though."
"No, I guess not."
I ask if we can go back inside and he responds by dropping his right hand away from my chin and steering us back towards the reunion.
"Since you wasted that glass of wine," he says with a small smile, "would you like a refill?"
"Absolutely," I respond quickly while the adrenaline is still coursing through me from the altercation with Lisa.
Tyler starts veering us towards the table we had been sitting at but I don't feel like sitting anymore. "Do you mind if we stand by the bar for a little bit?"
"Not at all."
While he's leading me there it dawns on me that he hasn't really socialized with anyone else the entire time he's been here. He hasn't left my side, except for when I went to talk with Lisa. I look at him curiously when he secures a spot at the far end of the bar. Raising an eyebrow at my expression he bends his head and speaks quietly.
"Is something wrong?"
"Nothing is wrong," I quickly say. "It's just that you haven't spoken to anyone else since you've gotten here. I'm sure you want to catch up with some people in here tonight."
One side of his mouth curls up as he notices me fidgeting my hands. I swear if I was ever brought in for questioning, my nervous quirks would give me away and I would have to sing like a canary. I have no idea what he could be thinking or what is about to come out of his mouth when he leans in and says, "I've waited a long time to be this close to you again so I'm not going to waste my time catching up with a bunch of people who didn't give a shit about me ten years ago."
Oh. My. God.
I only caught the first part of what he just said. The rest sounds like Charlie Brown's teacher to me. Now, call me crazy, but that would mean that he's been thinking about me. I almost want to give him a high five and say "
you too?
" but I'm pretty sure that's not the way to play this. Instead, I let the information absorb itself into my subconscious and save it for a rainy day.
"What about you?" He asks pulling me out of my thoughts.
The million dollar question. Do I defy all rules of the sisterhood and spill my guts by telling him that he is essentially
the
reason I came home after ten years? To be fair to myself, I did pretty much have a life changing event occur not ten minutes ago that had nothing to do with him, so... here goes nothing.
"I came to see you," I say apprehensively, still hoping that honesty is the best policy.
I wouldn't be surprised if he could hear my heart beating loudly in my chest like a bass drum. Tyler brings his hand up to brush the backs of his fingers against my cheek lightly. His eyes drop to my mouth for a second and he licks his lips quickly before bringing his piercing gaze back to mine.
"You're more beautiful than I remember, do you know that?"
I can't say anything back to him. I don't even shake my head. I'm sure I have that deer in the headlights look my mom was telling me about yesterday. The same pull that I felt ten years ago is still there, if not stronger. He has an innate ability to make me feel safe and comfortable in my own skin. How he can do that after all this time, I have no idea, but it also scares the living crap out of me.
"I would pay good money to know what's going on in that pretty little head of yours right now," he says and takes a step closer.
When he pulls his hand back from my cheek, I grab it and lock my fingers in between his, needing to feel his warmth for a moment longer.
"I was just thinking that you make me feel safe… you always have," I say quietly.
His beautiful, full wattage smile makes my belly flutter with anticipation and melts away some of my nervousness. I manage to smile back when I feel his thumb trace circles on the back of my hand that he's still holding.
"Let's get out of here," he purposes out of nowhere and catching me by surprise. "Come back to my hotel with me for a drink. We have a lot more catching up to do."
Anyone else, it wouldn't be a question; I'd say no and probably run for the hills. Tyler Anderson, hot as hell bad boy who I've been wanting all these years and has grown into an even better version than what I've dreamt about... yes.
"Is that a yes?" He asks slightly amused at my dazed expression.
It takes a second or two, but I finally am able to bring myself to say out loud that one little word that has so much meaning and possibilities behind it.
"Yes."
I'm so relieved I decided to drive my own car over to Tyler's hotel. I'm spending the short three or four mile drive having an internal debate with a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other.
"
Don't sleep with him,
" angel says innocently, while the devil screams, "
Do him twenty ways to Sunday
!"
Before I know it, I'm pulling into the parking lot of his hotel. Tyler parks his car, which by the looks of it, tells me he must be doing very well in the restaurant business. He steps out of his black Audi A5 Coupe while I sit in my parked car frozen, trying to figure out whether the angel or the devil won.
If I sleep with him he'll probably think I'm a slut or easy. If I don't sleep with him he'll think I'm a goody-goody. Which isn't a bad thing, it's just not who I am really. The fact that I haven't had sex in almost four years isn't helping the decision making process in the slightest. My body wants to say yes so badly and throw caution to the wind, while I'm not sure my heart can take it. I am leaving for Miami in five days so that adds yet another element to the equation.
In the midst of my struggle Tyler's light tapping on my driver's side window snaps me back to the here and now. Shit. How long have I been sitting here? I'm slow to turn my head to look out my window, afraid that he might think I'm crazy. Instead, I find him leaning against his car door with his hands in his pants pockets and a huge grin plastered on his face. He's so gorgeous and it's so not helping my situation. I take in a breath, blow it out, and turn off the car. Reaching over the center console to grab my clutch on the passenger seat, he opens my car door for me and extends his hand to help me out.
"Thank you," I manage to say to him.
With his mischievous grin still in place, he lets go of my hand and steps back to lean against his car again.
"Would it help if I told you I was a little nervous too?" He brings his thumb and index finger within an inch of each other indicating to me just how "little" nervous he is. The lightness in his voice helps to put me at ease as I mimic his stance and lean against my car.
It does help knowing that he's even just a little bit nervous and I tell him as much by nodding my head. Although, why would he be nervous? He doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who gets turned down often, if not at all. While I'm thinking this over in my mind, a cell phone vibrates. At first, I think it's mine, but I remember that after hanging up on Julia earlier I turned off my ringer. Tyler digs into his pants pocket and looks at his phone and quickly presses a button to ignore the call. He puts the phone back in his pocket then steps off his car and asks if I would like to go inside to the hotel bar.
Walking through the doors of the hotel, we head towards the bar which has all of two other patrons inside of it. There are several open booths that I automatically start walking to, thinking that if we have a table between us I'll be able to get handle on my nerves without him being in such close proximity.
I slide into my side of the booth, never taking my eyes off of him as he leans on the bar and orders our drinks. He puts his hands in his pocket, I think to retrieve his wallet, but he pulls out his cell phone again. This time, his face looks momentarily agitated when he presses a button or two on his phone to dismiss the call he must be getting and shoves the phone back in his pocket hastily as the bartender returns with our drinks. He walks back and hands me my wine glass and sits down opposite me.
"Can I ask you a question," I say out of nowhere.
He nods as a light bulb goes off in my head, reminding me of something I need to know about him before asking him my original question. "Are you single?"