Promote Yourself (10 page)

I suggest that you dress one level up from whatever the office standard is. If the dress code is jeans, wear khakis. If it's business casual, wear a jacket but no tie. You get the point. You also need to be prepared. Bottom line: By dressing professionally and appropriately, you're sending the message that you're ready for more responsibility and upward movement.

 

Getting That Second Chance

As I mentioned earlier, first impressions are incredibly important, which is why you need to do everything you can to make a good one. A bad first impression is hard to recover from. But definitely
not
impossible. It's going to take some work, though. “Making a great first impression by being prepared, engaged, and authentic, is essential,” says Todd Davis, the Head of Recruitment, NA Fulfillment at Amazon. “If you can get back to demonstrating those qualities, you've got a good chance.” John Bell, Global Managing Director of Social@Ogilvy (the advertising giant), told me that while anyone can stub a toe in a single encounter, “what we do consistently over the first ninety days of a job or engagement is what people will remember most.”

Recovering from a bad first impression is all about exceeding expectations. In some ways that'll be easy—after your first screwup, you have the chance to beat expectations the next time around. But you need to think carefully about what went wrong and consider how to correct it. Does it have to do with your image? Was it something you did? Something you said? The most important step in recovering from a bad first impression? As Todd Davis told me, “You need to own your bad first impressions. Follow up with the person you think you missed the mark with. They'll appreciate it.”

Don't take anything I'm saying here as an invitation (or permission) to not take first impressions seriously. Erica Tremblay, Director, Market Intelligence & Marketing Development Program at EMC, says that while it's possible to recover, there's no guarantee that you'll actually get the chance. “People are busy, they may move on to another project and never work with you again so you never get the opportunity to right the ship,” she says. “It's best to focus on making a solid first impression.”

The reason for that is pretty simple: The first meeting sets expectations for future interactions. And the second is also important because it either confirms or overrides whatever happened during the first impression. If you had made a less-than-stellar first impression, expectations for your second meeting will be pretty low—and easy to exceed. If your first impression was good, expectations will be high for the second. If you meet them, you'll have established a reputation. If you don't, you'll have to start thinking about third impressions.

 

Building Relationships

If I had to come up with another synonym for “soft skills” besides “emotional intelligence,” I'd probably go with “building relationships.” Everything we've talked about in this chapter has to do with connecting with other people. On one hand, there's connecting with customers and others outside your organization. People want to do business with others they know and trust. Ronisha Goodwin, College Recruiting Manager at the Hyatt Hotels Corporation, summed it up nicely: “Our managers have to be able to connect with both our guests and our employees. It's great that they are skilled at their jobs, but we need individuals who can speak to the ‘human needs' of both our employees and our guests ensuring that they both feel understood and respected.” Katherine Larner, an Account Executive at Pandora, adds, “Sales is incredibly focused on relationship building since people don't want to buy things from someone they don't get along with or trust (also, they tend to spend more money with people they like to work with and trust!). It's the same as when you tip a good waitress more than the usual 15 percent—that's because you liked their soft skills. It's not the
only
reason someone will buy from me, but it helps to get that extra ‘tip' when you are an attentive and easy person to work with and continue to show genuine, personal interest in people.”

On the other hand, there are the people you work with and for. And building relationships with them is equally important. A recent Harvard study found that only 15 percent of the reason people advance in the workplace is related to taught skills and job knowledge.
3
The other 85 percent has to do with people skills. And by
people skills
I mean
being liked
. “From month one, I did everything that I could to weave myself into the fabric of the company—whether it was joining the events committee, volunteering to help with a new program, playing on the company softball team, writing cards at Christmas, planning a good-natured prank on a coworker, or happily offering up my time for candidate interviews,” says Ginger Lennon, a young Marketing Manager with Digital Influence Group, a marketing services firm in Boston. “I quickly found that it was much easier to get colleagues to not only like you, but to help you out and do great work for you when you are generous with your time and committed to building a fun, positive, and friendly work environment and company culture.”

A majority of managers admit that before a formal promotion process gets under way, they've already identified the person they want to tap, according to a study done at Georgetown University by Jonathan Gardner and Berland Associates. They found that 56 percent of large employers that had more than one person in line for a promotion already had a favorite—and the criteria for being a favorite had nothing to do with skills; it was all about likability. Ninety-six percent of the time, the favorite got the job. What that means is that even if you aren't the most technically qualified for a job, you've still got a fighting chance for a promotion—if your boss likes you.

Keep in mind, though, that being liked all by itself isn't always enough. There has to be some substance there too. Melanie Mitchell, Senior Vice President, Search Marketing Strategy at Digitas, told me a great story that illustrates this point nicely. “I worked with a young man who was great at making his peers and the team laugh, but he hardly ever pitched in to do extra work when help was needed. He mostly did the bare minimum to get by. Nothing more. He typically came in at 9 and was out by 5:30 every day. One day a few people caught him sleeping at his desk, which did not go over well with management. Eventually, he left the company on his own terms to pursue another job. But about eight months later he reached back out to us. He heard we had a position open and said that he still had fond memories of the people, culture, and working with us. When we connected with the team that was hiring—the same team he'd worked with before—the short answer was “no thanks.” Not because he wasn't a nice guy or funny, but because they needed someone to pitch in and truly be part of the team. And based on what they knew about him from before, he clearly wasn't that guy.”

 

Becoming a Leader in Your Organization

Becoming a leader will help you build your brand and get ahead faster. Of course, for that to happen, managers have to see you as leadership material. What does that mean? Managers are looking for people who have vision, who see possibilities where others see dead ends; individuals with courage who are willing to take calculated risks to achieve results; individuals who set the bar higher than most others and who jump at the chance to exceed expectations; individuals who inspire trust and confidence in their coworkers, excel at resolving conflict, and work well on teams.

Developing leadership qualities is definitely possible—and since you're now working on your soft skills, you're well on your way. Now it's just a question of getting practice. And the best way to do that—and to demonstrate your leadership potential—is to take on leadership roles wherever and whenever possible. But don't sit back and wait for the offers to pour in. You'll need to go out there and find them.

 

What Makes a Leader?

Being a leader is incredibly important: In our study, 78 percent of managers and 84 percent of employees say that leadership skills are either “very important” or “the most important.” Below you'll find twenty leadership traits that I heard from the dozens of manager we interviewed for this book:

  1. Be a team builder (86 percent of managers and 82 percent of employees say this is very important or most important)

  2. Have relationship-building skills (75 percent of managers and 79 percent of employees put this at or near the top of their lists)

  3. Have character, energy, passion, charisma

  4. Be dedicated to accomplishing tasks, goals, missions, objectives

  5. Be open, honest, straightforward

  6. Think creatively

  7. Be fair—give everyone a shot and give everyone credit

  8. Be well organized and have the ability to delegate tasks

  9. Deal well with others—understand conflict resolution and be sensitive to the emotions of others

10. Have the confidence to take risks

11. Work well under stress

12. Recognize new opportunities as they arise

13. Be able to craft and articulate messages to an audience

14. Have a relentless work ethic and a never-give-up mentality

15. Inspire greatness in others

16. Be competent—to understand everyone else's role and still be an expert in your own

17. Be able to ask the right questions, find the right answers, and make good decisions

18. Be humble—don't take credit for everything

19. Take personal accountability for the success of your team

20. Have good communication skills

I often find that looking at a list isn't as effective as a good, real-world example. And because everyone defines
leadership
a little differently, I want to give you an opportunity to hear from managers themselves what they're looking for. Megan Cherry, a College Relations Recruiter at Tyson Foods, is looking for young people who are “very professional, very mature, very good at delegation, but very good about knowing where your breaking point is and giving praise where praise is due.” Brian Pototo, Director of Global Talent Acquisition at Brocade, told me, “I have three Millennials on my team who impress me on a regular basis with their enthusiasm, dedication, and commitment to their work and our team.” And PepsiCo's Paul Marchand says, “We look for leaders who have integrity, are collaborative, and are constantly curious and challenging. Those who see new opportunities, who are adaptable, and who show flexibility will see many doors open throughout their careers.” And James Wisdom, Second Vice President of Integrated Marketing at insurance giant Aflac, looks for “willingness and the energy to embrace the unknown and solve a puzzle, organized thinking, and the capability and pluck to ask the right questions to deconstruct what may appear impenetrable.”

As I said earlier, becoming a leader is a great way to build your brand and accelerate your upward path through your company. Good managers know that good leaders are the future of the organization, and they've always got their eyes open for talent. Develop the skills that are most in demand and you'll get noticed more. And you'll never get anywhere if you don't get noticed.

 

The Difference Between Leaders and Managers

As we discussed in the previous chapter, workers in older generations were often promoted based on seniority and number of years spent at the company. But in today's workplace, where everything has to be learned and everyone is expendable, seniority-based promotions are pretty much a thing of the past. Respecting your boss, however, is definitely
not
a thing of the past. He or she has experience and juice within the company—both of which can help
you
advance your career.

At the same time, while the words
manager
and
leader
were once used interchangeably, the definitions have changed. Not all managers are good leaders and not all leaders are good managers. In general, mangers are more operations- and goals-based—making sure the trains run on time, that things go according to plan, that targets get met and budgets don't get blown. Leaders are more forward-thinking and innovative, asking “Where do we go from here?” or “Who else do we need on our team to be able to get to the next level?”

 

How to Lead Your Team Members So They'll Support You

Want to be a great leader? Want to accomplish great things quickly and efficiently? Of course you do. Well, it all starts with your team. The better you know them, the easier it will be to motivate them. And the more motivated they are, the more they'll accomplish. It all starts with paying attention: What kind of people are they? What motivates them? What doesn't? What are they oversensitive about? Knowing this will save you a huge amount of time and energy.

Next, you need to set clear goals and milestones and get buy-in from everyone. Good leaders stay organized and always know what's going on, where, and who's working on it. Then, every chance they get, they give the people on their team proper credit. You need to do the same. You'd be amazed at how many people don't give others credit—and then wonder why they can't get their team motivated.

Good leaders also have open-door policies and go out of their way to make their team members feel comfortable working with them. They make their team members feel like they're part of something bigger than themselves. It's up to you to make sure your team members know about the company's goals and agenda and to show your team how the projects they're working on affect the whole company.

 

Making Tough Conversations Easy

So far we've talked about a lot of different ways to communicate with the people you work with, and how being an effective communicator is a very in-demand leadership skill. But there are two more aspects of communication that we need to cover: How do you deal with conflict (between you and someone else as well as between two other people)? And how do you deal with criticism (receiving and giving)? No one wants to deal with unpleasant situations, and people who can handle tough communication challenges are a rare breed. If you learn how, you'll definitely set yourself apart from your peers and position yourself as a true leader.