PUSH: Ultra Alpha MMA Badboy Mafia Romance (Southside Brotherhood Book 2) (10 page)

“
Honey
.” Lilly could hear the lecture coming. “Marriage is a sacrifice sometimes. But you can make it better, be
nice
, treat him like a man. Let him be in charge. You put in some effort, try to look your best, smile. You need to smile more. It’s just how it’s done, Lilly. You should be thankful you will have such a privileged life. You know what it is like to grow up poor. You have no idea how comforting it is to know your children won’t have to bear that burden.”

The thought of procreating with Colin sent the freckles screaming right off her nose.

“Mom, stop. I tried. He was awful from the first day.”

“Oh, yer bein' dramatic. You always try to make things out to be so much worse. If he didn’t love you, would he have spent all that money to visit and help Topher pay for yer school all those years even before yer marriage was arranged? The world puts too much focus on being
happy
. Duty. Fulfilling your obligations. That is how you get by in this life. Do yer duty. Show him you want
him
to be happy. You said he wants you to lose some of yer…” Lilly could hear her take a deep breath and hold back a cough, “yer extra. You’ve always been a bit too ripe for most men’s taste. Try. Take a walk, show him yer tryin'.”

Lilly bit on her upper lip, blew out a deep breath and held the phone off her ear for a long moment.

“I need to go. I’ll see if I can get him to let you come sooner. You sound bad.”

Not that her mom had sounded good for a long time.

Even before the day they found Abigail on the side of the path to town with her shopping basket overturned and her lips turning blue, everyday still looked like a struggle to Lilly.

“I’m fine. Do yer duty, Lilly. Do yer work and put in some effort. Do that hair of yers. I know yer lettin' it run as wild as a field of thistle without me. A man wants his woman to have some style, put some time into her appearance, not just let herself go. Yer too young and don’t know how it is yet. You have beautiful eyes. Get some makeup, a little bright red lipstick. Do yer part—”

“Bye, Mom. I have to go. I love you but you’re driving me right into a big bottle of Jameson right now.”

“Oh, honey. That’s another thing. Maybe you should cut back on the—”

“Love you!
Bye
.” Lilly rolled her eyes, drew the phone back and tapped the red circle with a sigh.

Lilly dug through her sable-colored canvas messenger bag and pulled at the snaps on the inside that gave her a little secret hiding place. Her fingers curled around the cool stainless steel flask.

Come to mama. The only thing about this life that works is I always have a designated driver.

Lilly closed her eyes as the burn warmed her from the inside. Even with the help of her liquid friend, when she closed her eyes, a flutter started in her legs and settled in her belly as a cut jaw, dark brow and glowing green eyes danced in her mind.

Leave me alone. Please, go away.

With another long draw on her medicine, Lilly could hear Flynn’s voice and the words he’d said to her when he’d found her alone in the boathouse the night of her birthday two months ago.

You can’t go back and make a new beginning. But there’s no stopping you from starting again right now, right here.…
I’m
right here. And I fucking swear, Lilly, I’ll take you away if that’s what you want.

Since that first night when Colin left her sitting at the dinner table, humiliated and stunned, the boathouse had turned into her church. A dot of light in the black sky. A place where for at least a moment, everything else faded away and she could breathe.

It was also the place where she and Flynn had shared their secrets. For months, they stole moments of solitude there. Then, the secrets turned into feelings, and Lilly knew what other people meant when they talked about finding someone, someone who felt like home.

A home she’d never had before—one that felt safe, warm, protective, abiding. It made her angry knowing he was out there, his very existence making her feel things that could only make her life harder.

BZZZZZZZ

Lilly jumped, her eyes darting to the phone on her desk. Someone had sent Ana a text.

Jesus. What a mess. I need to get out of here. I’ll finish the work at home.

Her cheeks were warm as she handed the phone back to Ana and made her way outside to the idling limo and her two black-suited comrades, waiting to be sure she got home from the dance safe and sound every night.

“Oh, yes, thanks for asking, I had a wonderful day. How about you?” She looked into the indifferent eyes of Igor as he held open the door.

The door slammed, and she let the buzz in her brain take over. The limo hummed below her, and she leaned her head back, letting her mind go where she knew there were monsters waiting.

How will this story end Romeo? I think I’ve read this one…

Chapter Eleven

Sunlight fought to find its way into the living room around Gideon’s frame from where he stood in the doorway to the guest house.

He handed a set of car keys to his brother with the same smirk that had looked back at Flynn since they were boys.

“I’m waiting.” Gideon smiled as Flynn turned his back in hopes that his half-wit, half-brother would leave without speaking.

“Fuck off. Get out. Then, fuck off again.”
Flynn grabbed his gym bag, heading to the kitchen to fill his water bottle.

“For my
thank you
.” Gideon enunciated every word, making Flynn’s fists ball.

“Get. The. Fuck. Out,” Flynn mocked him without turning.

“You know,” Gideon rubbed his chin then settled his arms crossed over his white dress shirt and blood red, silk tie, “if Dad doesn’t kill you, her father will.”

“Are you damaged? What part of ‘get the fuck out’ is confusing you?” Flynn still didn’t meet his eyes as he tightened the cap on his water bottle and shoved it into his red and black nylon bag.

“I’m not the one confused.
Go get laid
; get it out of your system. Dad hired two new maids, nice, young. Of
course,
they are over eighteen; no laws will be broken
here.”
Gideon curled his lips to the side. “Dip your wick, clear your head. Just please, tell me you’re staying away from our soon-to-be new mommy. I mean, what the fuck is the draw? She reminds me of a peasant girl who’s been stuffing a bit too much cake down her gullet.”

Flynn’s back muscles clenched. He could hear the blood begin to rush in his ears like the sound of the ocean in a conk shell.

Don’t fucking engage, man. He’s not worth it.

“Jesus, what the fuck? I’m leaving, so get out the fucking door. You’re a dick.” Flynn held his bag in one hand, and his other was quickly turning into a cannon with the fuse lit.

Gideon didn’t move.

He stood square in the doorway, daring his brother to push by, to ignite the ever-burning tension that sparked between the half-blood brothers.

“I’m trying to help you. You’ve never given a shit about some split tail before. Granted, you seem to have some holier-than-thou complex about the girls around here, but I know you, man. Don’t pretend to be some fucking saint. How many girls have you fucked and you didn’t even know their names? Huh?”

“At least mine weren’t bought and paid for by Dad.”

“Hey, Dad brings them in; they can’t resist my charms.” Gideon adjusted his tie. “Most of them think they are special, I will fall in love, and we will live here happily ever after. It’s a fun game. For me.”

“Fuck
off
. Jesus. Get the fuck out of the way.” Flynn shouldered into him by the door, but Gideon only leaned into his push.

“I want you to fall in fucking line, bro. You don’t know what a good thing we have going here. And, with little Miss Fire-Hair at the keyboard, we are set to launch into a whole new world.
Legit
. No more managing whores and crack dealers for the next generation. Don’t get in her head and fuck this up. Don’t think just because you’re blood, we won't fucking make you disappear. Trust me, Dad doesn’t care who you are anymore. All he wants is for his new, brainy bride to finish her project, pay off the old family debt and set his dick inside that little bitch until—”

It took less than a second between when Flynn opened his hand and the gym bag hit the floor to the first sickening thud of Gideon’s head against the wood frame of the doorway.

Flynn took him down in a flash of legs and fire breathing. When Gideon finally recovered for a split-second, Flynn stalled his efforts by cocking back and laying siege to Gideon’s left jaw.

Even though Flynn had caught his brother unaware, Gideon was a trained fighter at the top of his game. Within ten seconds, he had his legs around Flynn’s waist, flipping him off and kicking him into the wall.

The frame of the already shattered mirror came crashing down. Flynn felt the corner of the table dig into the middle of his back. A bright flash of something most would register as extreme pain exploded in his brain.

“What the fuck! You’re a fucking animal, you know that?” Gideon shot to stand up, arms bowed, chest out as he dragged both hands through his hair.

Flynn felt his entire body vibrating as if low voltage ran through him as he fought the urge to wrap his fingers around Gideon’s throat and introduce him to the next life.

“I think you need some new pants.” Flynn grabbed his bag, fighting to steady his breath and hold back his laugh.

“Do your fucking job. Don’t be such an embarrassment. Don’t take sides against Dad. You’ll lose. You know that, don’t you? He’ll cut you off like a tumor. Why do you always have to push—” Gideon swore under his breath as he looked to see his boxers hanging out the split seam of his pants.

Flynn pulled his shoulders back, the knot in his muscle where the table caught him beginning to throb.

“I was
trying
to go do my fucking job when you showed up, but you wouldn’t get your ‘tard ass out of my way.”

“Fine. Whatever, just remember what happened the last time you tried your knight in shining armor routine with her. Next time, he won’t just kick you out. You
know
that!” Gideon was talking to the back of Flynn’s head as he made his way toward the jet black Suburban parked in the guest house drive.

Yeah, I fucking know that. I also know I’ve got a damn big dog in this fight and this shit ain’t over. Not by a long shot. No fucking way I’m letting that fuck marry her. Suck her dry of every shred of humanity she has left, just like he did to Mom. Just like he does to everyone.

Inside the car, Flynn slowed his breath, his hand curling around the steering wheel as he watched Gideon work his way toward the path in the woods.

Flynn laughed out loud, knowing he would normally have walked the paved strip through the garden, a more direct route back to the main house. But, today, he would have to hide his ass in the tree line because he looked like a punk with his drawers hanging out of the split in his fancy pants.

Flynn put the mammoth SUV into reverse and glanced in the rearview, hoping that he would see a glimpse of her in the mirror.

Something, anything—he craved her like a drug.

One girl, three kisses and a lifetime of sorrow had created inside of him a place that felt both peaceful and at war. Why did it have to be her? Or anyone? He couldn’t lie and pretend shit wasn’t far easier before she fell into his life.

Gideon spoke the truth. Flynn had never lacked a girl in his bed whenever he felt the urge. In the gym where they both trained until just a couple months ago when Colin kicked him out, both the brothers were at the top of the food chain when it came to choosing tail.

Winning both in the ring and out, with undefeated records in both fighting and fucking, Flynn barely felt the bodies that had wrapped around his dick when he’d needed a release. Unlike his brother, he did know their names; he just harbored no emotion for any of them. He made it clear up front it was sex only, and they still came running.

Ring girls and groupies who knew their family or just liked the idea of fucking a fighter are as thick as thieves. And, when it came to Flynn, they talked a lot. They also walked slowly for a few days after.

Lilly had turned every girl who came before into a distant lump of meaningless sex. Flynn felt no connection to any of them, especially now that he realized what it felt to have true desire, a burning that came from somewhere so deep inside, he couldn’t identify its origin.

***

As Flynn drove the fifteen minutes to the Southside gym, every moment of that day when he first tasted her lips played over and over in his mind.

It had been a usual Sunday with Colin disappearing. He’d usually take one of the young maids to their quarters or out somewhere and reappear around dinner time with a smug look.

Flynn had shadowed Lilly that Sunday as his father found his way into some maid’s bed. In his father’s absence, Flynn had taken it upon himself to keep turning up wherever Lilly was — everywhere from the study to the piano where she’d sat and played
Whiskey in the Jar
, singing softly. The sadness in her soft voice pulled at his gut.