Questing Sucks (Book 1) (15 page)

“
Woah
, did you see that move, Rina? I bet even Sehn couldn’t do that.”

Sehn’s eyebrows rose and his ears twitched. Without taking another look at Cah’lia, he stormed his way over to his ungrateful disciple.

“You dare challenge the Great Sehn to a Dwarven, umm, whatever the fuck it’s called again war! Prepare to be outdone, children. Let all of Koringrath know that Sehn the almighty has arrived!”

 

Chapter 14: Over my
Dead
Body

 

Alan Marshall hiccupped then slammed his bottle of whiskey down on top of his chipped, wooden command desk. He eyed his three lieutenants with disinterest. They’d been prattling on about something or another for close to an hour, and only now was Alan beginning to listen to a word of what they had to say.

“Can you repeat that?” Alan asked. “You said something about a war?”

“Commander Marshall, I feel like you’re not listening to us,” Marcus, his junior lieutenant said. The stone-faced man seemed to be trying his best not to shout, ripples of stress and frustration forming on his fierce eyes and shimmering down his dark skin.

“Gentlemen, gentlemen, I hear you I hear you.” Alan Marshall picked up the bottle again, taking another gulp of the strong drink.

First Lieutenant and Cavalry Sergeant Rebecca Hearthorn growled at Alan, a gesture that would normally land her a week in the dungeons. Luckily for her, Alan wasn’t much one for formality or rules.

She raised her voice at him. “Within five days’ time, an army unlike any that we have ever seen is going to attack our city. We need to evacuate now; we number but three thousand, while they number half a million. Do you not understand that, commander? A
half million
soldiers are marching on Steadrow-Pillar. What’s more, we don’t know who our enemy is or which nation they belong to! They have come out of nowhere and have massacred over twenty of the Kingdom’s smaller villages. And now they’re coming for the first of our cities. We need to pack up and leave.”

Marshall smirked. “Did anyone ever tell you how sexy you look in full armor, Rebecca?”

In one of the biggest displays of protocol-breaching behavior he had ever seen, Rebecca unsheathed her dagger and slammed down on top of his desk, right between his folded hands and less than an inch away from his fingers.

Marshall didn’t let the gesture get to him.

“Look, gentlemen,” he began, but paused when he met Rebecca’s glare. “And lady. I am not about to hand over Steadrow-Pillar to an invading army. It’s no secret that I was only sent this far away from the capital for my drunken insubordination.” He smiled. He was so proud of it.

“But wherever I am, with however many men I have, I won’t yield even an inch. If they’re going to take this city, then that’s fine, but they’re going to lose a lot of lives in the process.” He gulped down another mouthful of the disgusting green liquid.

Alan Marshall was accounted one of the greatest tacticians and commanders in recent Kingdom history. But his frequent acts of drunken stupidity—which were always totally cool and awesome!—had forced the king to send him to this dump of a city, so far away from home.

Most people were shocked when they learned he had no shame, but why would he? Every prank he pulled was amazing. He had escaped execution repeatedly due to his performance in battle and his loyal service to the Kingdom.

But his last incident was, as they say, ‘the straw that broke the Cockaliths Wibbledom.’ He had woken up in the dungeon below the good King’s castle, with no recollection of what he had done to get there, which meant whatever he did had to have been awesome. The judge had offered him a choice between execution and being sent here. At first he’d chosen execution, but then the judge offered him a bargain he couldn’t refuse. The Kingdom agreed to give him the full report of his criminal behavior on the night of his arrest in return for his service here at Steadrow-Pillar.

Alan still couldn’t believe what he had done, even for him! Supposedly he had interrupted a political dinner of the highest and most important caliber. The report said that the King, Queen, and all the major nobles of the entire Kingdom had been gathered to make some of the most important decisions in Kingdom history.

The report continued to note that they were only moments from signing a treaty that would usher in a new dawn of prosperity, when out of nowhere the dining room door slammed open, and Marshall had walked in. He was completely naked, except for the Queen’s panties he wore over his head, which the report alleges he stole from the pantry.

That alone would have been bad enough, but there was more. It then stated he vomited all over the floor and tripped on his own vomit, tumbling and falling face first onto the royal carpets. The report claims he tried to pick himself up by grabbing onto the expensive Rezza-spider fabric of a nearby table, but he only ripped it off and caused the candles burning atop it to tumble over and start a huge fire. The entire dining hall had to be evacuated, and the treaty was never signed.

If all that was hard enough to believe, the report had one final page. Supposedly on their way out of the burning room, Marshall had drunkenly wobbled his way over to Saerina, an Elvin princess from the city of Elvadin, and the most important and prestigious guest that had visited the Kingdom in over two thousand years.

The report claimed he stumbled over to her, naked, with vomit and booze covering his chest and face, and began to do an erotic dance in front of her, grabbing his genitals and shaking his rump as the room went down in flames around them.

It was the very next morning, awakening in that dark cell, that commander Alan Marshall realized he had but one single regret in his entire life: that he couldn’t remember any of it.

“You three should set out and find Patrick,” he demanded between large gulps of wine.

Marcus and Rebecca glanced at each other and nodded as if a wordless message had crossed between the two of them.

“Listen, commander,” Rebecca said. She was positively gorgeous, with swift red flowing hair, bright green eyes, and long luscious thighs that were sadly covered most of the time by her grey battle armor.

“If you die here, and we don’t have you when this army crosses deeper into our territory, this could very well spell out the end of our nation. Probably not just for us, either as, whomever these people are, they seem to be inclined to wipe out everyone in their path. It is for this reason, Marshall, that you need to come with us and find Patrick. You know as well as I do that once the King or Patrick becomes fully aware of this threat, you’d be called back immediately anyway. I don’t much care for you—it’s no secret—I think you’re vulgar, disgusting, and a pig.”

“Why thank you. I was aiming to be all of those things. It seems my hard work has—”

“But!” she interrupted. “I will not stand idly by and watch my entire race be slaughtered because the one man who could have done something about it decided to get himself killed out of some ridiculous pride.”

Marshall frowned as his three subordinates closed in on him. They were really going to kidnap their own commander?

Damn,
he thought.
I need to be more strict with my underlings.

 

 

Chapter 15: Stubborn

 

Cah’lia took the last of her clothing out of one of the inn room’s drawers then threw it back into her travel bag. Today was an important day, because not only were they going to finally depart Koringrath, but they were also going to make sure Nero and Rina returned to Elvar.

She knew it wasn’t going to be easy, and not just because of Nero; Rina was becoming just as attached to Sehn as Nero was, and the two followed Sehn wherever he went. Her little brother and the Human girl had also seemed—in such a short time—to take a liking to one another. In the two days since they’d rescued Rina, Nero and the former slave girl had been in about fifteen fights, only to make up minutes later. It was odd, and not because of their different races. Humans and Elves were similar enough that fostering each other’s young was nothing new, and despite not being among the more common sights, people seldom thought twice about it. No, it was odd because one was a former slave, and one was a freeborn Elf.

Cah’lia wasn’t sure, but she supposed that, to Nero, Rina was like a new sister. The only moments in past two days they’d allowed Sehn some alone time were when they were off playing together. It was Cah’lia who kept an eye on them then. Cah’lia decided that when the children had returned to Elvar, she would take Rina in. Her mother would make sure the girl received the same love she gave Nero. It would also teach Nero a valuable lesson in sharing.

Even before meeting Sehn, Nero had become very possessive and greedy of his toys, books, and any other things that were given to him. Cah’lia could have kept him away from the insufferable Elf, but there was something about Sehn that made her stay her hand—things she was only beginning to discover now.

Cah’lia had made sure that Sehn stayed indoors gambling the day before. In his fit of passion, he had allowed—or at least he believed he did—Patrick to execute the Drashian and the former mayor. Sehn would deny it a million times, but Cah’lia knew that had he been present he would have intervened.

Knowing Sehn, at the last moment before the execution, he’d probably make up some excuse and then charge the gallows in an attempt to free that disgusting pig of a man who called himself the Overseer.

Cah’lia exited the wondrous room with a feeling of regret. There would be very rough days of travel ahead, and she’d surely come to miss the comforts of the extravagant inn. But Patrick had told her that they’d be treated as royalty at every Human city they came across. Not that Cah’lia required such; she did not need to be pampered one way or the other, but any girl, Human or Elf, would feel as if they were in heaven in the noble places Patrick resided.

She walked down the short corridor on the second floor of the inn, stopping in front of the room the men were staying. Rina had stayed with Cah’lia in her room, but she'd gotten up an hour early to bring Sehn his breakfast in bed. Knowing Sehn, he was not going to like that.

There was a great deal of noise coming from behind the door.

“Rina, you can’t just bring Sehn stuff, it has to go through me first. I am his greatest disciple, and I must be the one to do it.”

“
No! Rina is master’s favorite. Nero is just a stupid boy.”

“What! You dare challenge the Great Nero to a favorite-war? You’re on, Rina.”

Cah’lia opened the door and tried not to laugh. She needed to be stern with the children; she needed obedience.

“Morning boys—and Rina.”

 
Rina’s face lit up as Cah’lia entered the room. The little Human girl jumped into Cah’lia’s arms and wrapped her arms around Cah’lia’s waist.

“Mistress Cah’lia, Mistress Cah’lia!” she called, squealing with excitement. “Today Rina ate two times, and she was even given new clothing! Then she was allowed to play games with everyone. Rina is so happy now.”

Cah’lia was at once very glad that both Nero and Rina were facing her direction, because behind them, sitting on his mattress, Sehn’s eyes glowed with a ferocity that even made Cah’lia feel fear. It was unsettling and nothing at all like Sehn’s usual arrogant, ambitious gleam. Whenever the former slave girl spoke of her mistreatment, Sehn’s eyes took on a look of pure animal rage.

Cah’lia knelt down to meet the girl’s eyes. “What if every day was like this, Rina? What if you could go to learning classes other children your age in a forest filled with wonderful people? There would be games to play and something new to do all the time. You could be anything you wanted to, Rina. Anything at all.”

Rina’s eyes grew moist as she listened to Cah’lia speak. “Rina could be anything she wanted?”

Cah’lia nodded. “Anyone, Rina.”

The little Human hugged her in an even tighter grip. “Rina wants to go then, Mistress, if she is allowed.”

“From now on you are to call me Cah’lia, Rina, and you are to call the Elf behind you Sehn. No more Mistress and Master from you.”

Rina shook her head yes, but Cah’lia knew it would take time. Nero seemed to be delighted upon hearing Cahlia's words. He put an arm around Rina’s shoulder.

“I guess it’s settled then, Rina, or should I say sis. When we come back with the treasure you’re gonna move in with us! I have so much cool stuff. I can’t wait to show you it all. I almost wish we were home right now!”

Cah’lia smiled. “That’s good, Nero. Because you
are
going home right now.”

In an instant, both Rina and Nero darted backwards, away from Cah’lia.

“What?” they shouted.

“You can’t do this, Cah’lia,” Nero insisted. “I need to be here for Sehn. You can’t make me abandon him. No, I won’t go!”

“Rina too!”

Cah’lia sighed. She knew this wasn’t going to be easy. She looked over to Sehn, who appeared oblivious to the conversation. Cah’lia should have figured it would be too much to expect him to back her up in this, especially when he was too busy drawing up more of his ridiculous documents.

“Sehn,” she called, “please explain to Nero that he is going home. They’re not listening to me.”

Sehn put down the parchment he was writing on, then broke out with roaring laughter. “Haha! Of course they are not obeying you, Fool’ia. Only the Great Sehn is obeyed.”

Sehn joined the three of them by the doorframe. He looked down on each of the small children. “Observe, Cah’lia. This is how it is done.” Sehn cleared his throat. “You two! The Great Sehn commands you to return to Elvar at once! Should you even think to disobey me, I shall summon a great bolt of lightning and strike you with it!”

Nero and Rina looked at Sehn and then looked at each other. Then they turned back to Sehn. “
No!”
they shouted in unison.

Patrick approached from the other end of the room. “Nero,” Patrick said. “It’s time for you to go home.” Patrick turned to Cah’lia. “I had always intended to send him home after we brought him as far as Koringrath, and I suspect you planned the same, yes?”

Cah’lia agreed. “I did as well. Nero, you’ve had your fun, and you’ve gotten to see a new place, something that most from Elvar will never do.”

Cah’lia had come to learn that the High-Chief of Elvar, Suhn, father to Sehn, had given Patrick her service in return for enough food to forever wipe out hunger from Elvar. Only by allowing Nero to come had he been able to goad Cah’lia into coming along as well. Now that she knew what her goal was and had some semblance of an idea what it was they were fighting for, she’d have gone even if no payment was offered. But bringing Nero along was a different story.

“I will make sure these two are brought back,” Patrick said. “I can even get them to Elvar in just three short days by sending them with our fastest riders. This time around, they will be traveling in a band with close to a hundred men. Not only will there be no danger, but there will be no possibility for them to escape, either.”

Cah’lia wondered how Sehn could overhear all of this and still suspect nothing about Patrick or his lineage.

“
Fine,” Sehn agreed. “Now let us prepare to leave. I want to be done with this journey as soon as possible.”

Rillith and Daniel crossed the room and stood next to Patrick. “As do we all,” Rillith said.

Nero looked furious, and Rina didn’t seem happy either. Her little brother kicked Sehn in his knee, and then shouted, “You can’t send us back if you don’t know where we are, morons!”

Before anyone could so much as raise a finger, the two little ones bolted out of the room and charged down the hallway. Cah’lia growled.

How did I not see this coming?

“Ouch, you little brats,” Sehn shouted after them. “You dare kick the knee of—ooh, that really hurt!”

Sehn awkwardly sprinted out of the room, limping slightly, and Cah’lia was quick to follow. She raced through the hallway and down the steps.

“Sehn,” she called to him as they reached the inn’s entrance. “You run to the left, and I’ll run to the right. We’re way faster than they are. We should be able to catch them before they get too far.”

“You dare order around the Great Sehn! I shall take the right, and
you
shall take the
nothing
, because the Great Sehn is so powerful that he can be in two places at once!”

Cah’lia ignored him and bolted out of the inn, then into the white-paved streets of Koringrath. She turned left and ran off into the distance, hoping Sehn would do his part. She almost knocked into an old woman carrying bags, who was forced to jump out of the way as Cah’lia whirled past her.

“Nero! Rina! You’re both in so much trouble when I find you!”