Rayqelle's Revenge ---Book 1--- Special Holiday Edition (Ratchet) (9 page)

The next day I arrived in L.A. at the Airport Sheraton hotel. I walked up to the front desk, told them my name and asked for room 2021. The clerk gave me a key card and pointed the way to the elevator. As I got in and closed the door I felt the butterflies in my stomach going crazy, I was about to come face to face with my worst nightmare! I was about to become a whore again! Everything I worked for, all I had been through, was all for nothing. In just a few short minutes I would be at the point of no return.

My hands shook nervous as I dug through my purse looking for my compact to powder the sweat from my nose. Then, I saw the small vile of white powder that Iesha gave me, incase I got jittery. I had never been more nervous!

I had never fucked wit’ cocaine before, it was the one thing I said I would never do, but then again, I also said that I would never turn another trick. Yet, there I was. So, I opened the small glass bottle, tipped it, dumping a little onto my pinky nail, and I snorted it, just as the elevator doors spread apart.

I arrived on the 20
th
floor and I stepped out, making my way down the long quiet hallway. I walked slowly and painfully, like I was on a Nazi death march. When I got to room 2021, I stopped, took a deep breath and knocked lightly on the beautiful cherry wood door. I had hoped to knock softly enough that who ever was on the other side might not hear even me and then I could just leave, but the door opened almost instantly. A woman answered.

“I’m sorry; I must have the wrong room. I was looking for Dr. Sadaaf Deepak.” I said nervously, thinking that I had disturbed the wrong person.

“I am Dr. Deepak”, the woman said, as she smiled with the most gorgeous set of blinding-white teeth I had ever seen before in my life!

“But, you’re a…” I said, stumbling over my words.

“A woman?” She replied, as she smiled again, sensing my embarrassment.

“Did you not know that you would be meeting a woman today?” She asked, with the most beautiful accent.

“Well, uh… no, but I guess you did.” I replied.

“I hope this does not change anything. I was and still am greatly looking forward to…well, you know” She said, as we both blushed uncomfortably.

“Please, come in” She said, politely.

She was absolutely breath taking! She looked like an Indian goddess. She wore a beautiful red silk robe, the kind worn by Japanese geisha girls in the movies. Her perfume was soft and unfamiliar. Her skin was a flawless dark caramel, almost darker the mine and she wore hair up in a simple twist, held together by a beautiful, long, golden hairpin.

She couldn’t have been more than twenty-nine or thirty years old, but she was a stunner! My heart pounded inside my chest like the kick from a bass drum, as she held the door from me to come inside.

“You must be Rayqelle. You are even prettier than Iesha described!” She said, as I entered the huge luxury suite. Her voice was as smooth as silk, and her accent was like a cross between the queen of England’s and a south-east Asian princess. I had been around all different kinds of people rich, poor, intellectual, uneducated and I hardly ever let anybody intimidate me, but I knew class when I saw it, and for the first time in along time, I felt out classed.

“Make yourself comfortable.” She said. “You can change in the bedroom... I’ll be out here... I have a few phone calls to make... So take your time”, she added, giving me a provocative stare, as I went the other room to change.

I don’t know if it was her soothing presence, or the coke, but I was starting to mellow out as I changed into my sexy lingerie.

When I came back out, all the lights had been turned down, and in each corner, four softly scented tea candles burned. Sadaaf stood silently beside the sofa.

“Come here” She whispered.

My stomach quivered, as the butterflies started up all over again.

I wore a white satin negligee with nothing underneath. She reached out her hand, as I walked over toward her. She touched my hand, and slowly untied my robe as she gently slid her other hand around my waist. Sadaaf moved closer and pressed her lips against mine, slowly working her way down to my breast. She massaged me while softly sucking and pulling at my nipples. Her tender touch soon made my pussy wet. My clit started to swell and thump, as I felt her reach between my legs.

We kissed again before she led me into the bedroom, holding one candle in her hand to light our way. She set the candle on the stand next to the bed, and turned toward me.

“Please lay down on the bed”, she said softly, getting behind me to guide me by the small of my back onto the huge king sized canopy bed.

She had taken full control of me, slowly turning my nervousness into a burning desire. I leaned back on the soft Egyptian-cotton sheets as she spread my legs, running her fingers along my inner-thighs, following closely behind with soft kisses, until she reached my wetness. Her touch made me feel so good. I could feel her desire as it overflowed!

She took her first two fingers and spread my pussy lips apart. Lightly flicking her tongue against my clit. Sadaaf moved slowly, but my climax came fast. I reached down and ran my hands through her silky, black hair as she steadily sucked and kissed my swollen clit, until I exploded.

Then I pulled her up toward me, squeezing her full, beautiful breast. They looked like two ripe peaches that had been dipped half way in chocolate. My mouth watered, as I gently sank my teeth into her, and she moaned.

Her robe fell from her shoulders and onto the bed. I ran my fingers from her belly button down to her hairy treasure. She had taken her time to thoroughly pleasure me, so I felt it was only fair that I spend the rest of the evening doing the same in return. Especially since this evening was costing her two thousand dollars.

Though Iesha promised that this would be the one and only time I had to this, she actually came back to me several more times over the next few weeks with the same pressure ploy. She was like a freight train that was speeding out of control. I could see her coming from a mile away; but I was tied helpless to the railroad tracks, unable to do a damn thing about it.

I had not talked to Chance more than once or twice in that two weeks and I knew that he was growing more and more suspicious. I had become an emotional and physical wreck! I had been taking tranquilizers during the day to help me sleep and cocaine to balance me out at night. This was so that I would be numb, but still alert enough to do what ever she wanted me to do. Letah was the only person who knew what was going on and it was tearing her apart. I now had her lying and covering up for me when I was out with a trick or when I was too sleepy or coked-out to deal with anybody, like Chance or Lynn. She would just say that I was still having a tough time getting over Davis’s death and that I was resting.

Another reason that I probably chose to hide behind the drugs was finding out that Davis had secretly been molesting Letah and that he was probably the person who had given her HIV. Not Tico like she had said earlier. In fact she may have actually infected him by accident when she ran away from home after I went away to grad school.  So luckily I was never even exposed to the virus.

I never even had a clue. All this time I’d believed that Davis was the last good man on earth. I felt so guilty that I had left her behind to suffer like that; Letah told me that the abuse started right around the time I started staying at grandmas. She said that she never told Lynn what was going on either, because he had her so full of fear that if she did tell anybody the courts would come along, split us all up, and take us away. We would never see each other again. Lynn still didn’t know, and there was no way to gage how she was going to react; after all that was her daddy so we had both decided that it would be best to wait. Lynn was still way too weak for any kind of drama and we didn’t need anything sending her into a relapse.

It was all too much to deal with. Things couldn’t have gotten any worse, at least that’s what I thought. By this time I had started to spiral downward and shit seemed more and more out of control. I hadn’t seen Chance in weeks! I could barely even talk to him because I was so guilty about letting Iesha trap me into trickin’ again. I couldn’t eat, I had lost almost fifteen pounds, and I had dark circles underneath my eyes. At this point I was snorting so much coke that I was starting to bleed from my nose, but I couldn’t stop cuz if I wasn’t high on something my hands shook constantly! My mind and body were both falling apart and my soul was aching! I had done a lot of stupid shit when I was younger, and I don’t deny that. But the one thing I never did was fuck around with hard drugs. I drank and smoked weed here and there depending on who I was around. Maybe Iesha and I might pop some “X” at a party but I swore never to do anything hard like coke or heroin, because I saw the effect that it could have on people. I knew better or so I thought. Yet here I was, in two weeks I had become a stone-cold junky. A coke-head! I was on the verge of losing everything. Every trick had promised to be the last, but Iesha always had just one more trick for me to turn, just one more thing to do. She was never gonna stop! I had spent all those years perfecting the art of the hustle, only to end up as the one being hustled. Iesha had orchestrated a brilliant plan. She was using what I used to be in the past to destroy all that I had become. I was caught between the proverbial rock and the ultimate hard place. Everything I had accomplished was at stake, and I could only see one way out. Iesha had to be dealt with! She needed to be dealt with before I fell completely apart and before she got bored with this little game of cat and mouse and decided to tell Chance about my past. The past that she had again made my present.

I missed Chance like crazy, but I avoided talking to him as much as possible. I was growing more distant as each day passed. It was evident that something was wrong and he was getting more and more concerned and suspicious since I was normally too fucked up or depressed to hold any kind of meaningful conversation with him at all. Not to mention the fact that Letah was quickly running out of excuses. This was a man that I had spent everyday of the last three years of my life with and wouldn’t have been apart from him for anything in the world. Now I was dodging him like I owed him money. I missed his touch, and the sexual encounters I was having brought me no personal satisfaction or pleasure. Ain’t no love in trickin’! No matter how attractive they were, how nice or how rich… At the end of the day it was just business and I was just a whore and Iesha had made herself my pimp. The very thing I was fighting to hold on to was slipping right through my fingers. My Chance was slipping away!

Another week or so had passed and I was still avoiding Chance like the plague. I had only spoken to him once and I was so high on tranquilizers that I could barely hold the phone. Letah was still covering my ass with excuse on top of excuse and she and I both knew that time was running out. She said that the last time she had spoken to Chance he sounded really anxious and she could tell that he was getting really fed up with excuses about why I was never able to come to phone and when I did we didn’t talk for more than a minute or so. Letha said that she hated lying to Chance because she really liked him but she knew everything I had been through and that I had finally found something real with him. Something that I was about ruin with all my lies.

It was Friday night around eight o’clock. I had just woke up and was still trying to pull myself together. Iesha was throwing a party with some niggas from the Lakers, a couple of rookies with way too much money to burn. I was super groggy from all the pills I had taken earlier that morning to get some sleep. So, I stumbled over to the dresser to get a baggy of dope to get me started. My hands were shaking outta’ control. I needed a hit so bad. I thought to myself, “If I could just keep my hands steady enough to line it up on the damn mirror!” The doorbell rang. I about jumped outta’ my goddamn skin! I was so jittery that I must have jerked and knocked the mirror on the floor with my coke on it. All the shit fell into the shag carpet, “aww, shit!” I shouted as my stomach started to cramp. I went into an immediate panic. That was the last bag and Iesha said she wouldn’t be able to get any more until tomorrow, but I had to get through tonight. So I got down on my knees and drug my nose back and forth against the nap of the rug, trying to snort up what I could. Then Letah frantically busted in the door screaming like a maniac, “Bitch, what the fuck are you doin’? Get up off the floor! Chance is here. He is down stairs right now! You better get yo’ shit together and get it together quick! He’s …” she shouted quietly before coming to a complete and awkward pause as she looked back, stunned, with her jaw dropped wide opened. Chance had been standing behind us in the doorway the whole time. I guess he was so excited to see me that he didn’t wanna wait so he decided to follow Letah up the stairs. She must have been so shaken up that she didn’t even notice Chance following right behind her.

Chance was completely silent as he looked at me. I was still bent over on my knees with my face close to the carpet, coke dust and dirt from floor stuck to my nose and upper lip. I was stunned like a deer caught in the headlights, and the look on my baby’s face expressed the true nature of his confusion.

“Rayqelle? What’s going on? What are you doing on the floor?” Chance said as he stood perfectly still trying to make sense of everything. I scrambled to my feet. “Hey baby. Why didn’t you call and let me know you were comin’? Gimme a hug.” I put my arms around him and held him tightly but he just stood there. Then, I reached up toward him, and ran my finger softly along his right eyebrow to smooth it out. And I touched his face. He jumped back slightly and looked at me before pulling away almost in horror. Chance stepped back and went into his jacket pocket; pulling out a napkin, reaching toward my face. I had started to bleed from one nostril. I snatched the napkin and turned away quickly to dab the blood from my nose. My hands were trembling and I was getting sick to stomach. I was standing in front of the man that I loved. The man I hadn’t seen or really even talked to in weeks, and the only thing I could think about was the dope I had spilled in the carpet. My skin was starting to crawl. I needed a hit bad! I was a broken mess! Letah politely excused herself and ran back down the stairs to check on Lynn. She didn’t wanna be anywhere insight when my shit hit the fan! Chance sat down in the chair by the cedar chest. “Why haven’t you been returning my calls? What’s goin’ on with you?” he asked.

“I’ve just been goin’ through a lot since my stepfather died. So many things have been goin’ on inside my head but I’m o.k. I’ll be fine,” I said, still agonizing over the last bag of coke I had so clumsily spilled a few minutes before. I was trippin’! I wanted to get back down on my knees and lick that spot on the rug that held the last bit of dust.

“Why are you sweating like that? Are you sick? And what were you doin’ on the floor like that? Why does your nose keep bleeding,” Chance asked as he reached for me again. I snatched away. I didn’t want him too close to me. I felt dirty and ashamed. I felt like he could see right through me.

“Sit down and talk to me. I have not seen you in over a month! Why do you keep squirming and dancing around? Seriously
… Are you alright?” he asked again, getting more impatient.

“I’m fine!” I snapped. “I ... I … I just need some water. Will you go downstairs and get me some? Get it from the faucet, and let it run for a few minutes so it gets nice and cold” I said trying to think of anything to get him out of the room for a minute.

“The faucet?” he asked. “You don’t even drink faucet water” he added, looking even more confused.

“Please! Chance, just go … and get… the water!” I said, almost begging. Chance looked at me with greater confusion, turning slowly and walking out of the door. I shut it behind him and quickly dashed over to the phone by the bed to call Iesha. She had to know somebody who could get their hands on some more coke. I dialed her number and the phone rang.

“Whaz-up, girl? You ready for this party? She asked. “Better brace yo’ self. I hear he’s got a dick the size of a California cucumber” she added.

“Iesha. Listen. I’m gon’ need some more coke. I spilled the last baggie on the floor when Chance rang the doorbell, and…” I tried to explain as she cut me off.

“Chance? What the fuck is he doin’ here? You better tell that nigga you got plans tonight!” Iesha said.

“Plans? I can’t just tell him that I have plans. He came all the way from Chicago and he’s my fiancé.” I said as my stomach churned and my body ached.

“Not for long. Not if you fuck this up! These niggas are paying me good money for that ass! Chance can have what’s left of it after they get finished!” Iesha barked into the phone like the bitch she was.

“What about the coke? I need some bad! Right now! Please? I’m gettin’ sick!” I begged Iesha.

“Bitch! Coke? What coke? You mean that white powdered courage you been snortin’ up like you was crazy? You stupid ho. That was china white, not coke! That was heroin!” Iesha said as she laughed uncontrollably.

“Heroin? Why the fuck would you gimme some shit like that? You scandalous bitch! You got me hooked on heroin? You said that was cocaine! You said it was just coke!” I screamed into the phone in pure terror!

“No, bitch! You said it was coke! You got yo’ self hooked, not me. You are the one that was suckin’ up that shit like a vacuum cleaner! I even told yo’ ass to slow down. But I know one thing, you better be ready by eleven o’clock or I’m gonna fuck you up fa’ real, and after I get finished I’m gonna sit yo’ rich nigga down and tell him a little story. A story all about yo’ nasty ass. So get it together! Brent Williams is gonna be waitin’!” Iesha shouted into the phone. “That’s why I don’t fuck wit’ dope fiends” Iesha said to someone in the back ground as she slammed the phone in my ear.

I started to cry. The shakes were getting worse, much worse! I was sweatin’ like a run away slave and my stomach was crampin’ like a mutha’fucka’. I was so sick that I never even realized that Chance had come back up the stairs and was standing in the doorway behind me with tears in his eyes. I stood up slowly and walked toward him. He stood motionless but he exuded more emotion than I was able to stand. He had heard the entire conversation. There was really no need to try and make up anymore lies. It had been a crazy ass six weeks, and what was really crazy is that I did all this shit to hold on to the one thing that had come to mean the world to me. Only to still end up about to lose it anyway. My world was crumbling right before very eyes!

“Who was that on the phone?” he asked.

“It was Iesha, she was …” I tried to answer.

“She was what? Stuffin’ yo’ nose wit’ dope? What the fuck is wrong with you? You look terrible! Iesha did this to you? Why? Just tell me why? Wasn’t she supposed to be yo’ girl?” He asked, as he stared at me with a sobering mix of utter confusion and complete disappointment, struggling to understand.

“So is this what you been doin’ wit’ cho’ self the last six weeks? Hangin out wit’ cho’ yo girl gettin’ high? Is this why you can never take my calls? Is this why you have been avoiding me like the plague? I had started to think you met somebody new, but I guess it wasn’t a somebody, just something.” His strong voice shuttered with intense hurt, and the sad part is that he didn’t even know the half of it. Not only was I now a junky, but I was also a liar and a whore. He just didn’t know it yet. If he thought he felt like crying now, wait until he hears everything! In about two hours I was gonna have to leave here. That’s when shit is really goin
g to go down; but before I could deal with anything I was gonna have to get a fix and quickly! Apparently I was goin’ through some sort of withdrawal from some shit I didn’t even know I was using. Since I had never used cocaine or heroin before, I had no idea what either one of them was supposed to feel like. All I knew was that it felt good and made the shit Iesha had me doing go down a whole lot easier. Tonight was the first time I had to be without it since I started using and I was not doing well at all.

Chance sat down on the bed and shook his head in disbelief; covering his face with both hands. He laid his head back on the oversized pillows. Devastated by what he had just learned and exhausted from jet lag, Chance closed his eyes, took a deep breath as he relaxed his head on the pillow. I watched him breathe as he laid perfectly still. His strong chest rose and fell as he began to drift off to sleep and before I knew it he was snoring. I sat on the floor next the bed, wanting to touch him, but I knew that this was my chance to slip out and do what I had to do. So I made sure not to wake him, then I grabbed my purse and some clothes. I knew that if I timed this right I could be out and back before Chance even realized that I was gone. I quietly crawled out of the door, gently closing it behind me. Then I carefully tip-toed down the stairs and ran over to wake Letah; who was sleeping on the couch. I touched her softly on the shoulder so that I didn’t startle her. I quickly explained to her that Iesha had been giving me heroin instead of cocaine and that was why I was getting sick and had to go find some more right away or I was gonna die; at least that’s what it felt like anyway. Letah begged to go with me, but I told her that I needed her to stay here in case Chance woke up before I could get back. If he got up and found me gone, I needed Letah to be here to try and keep him calm. Fortunately Chance was a hard sleeper, and when he was out he was usually out for the count! Letah agreed to stay behind, but I told her to call me right away if Chance woke up. If she had to tell him anything, just to tell him that I just went for a drive and that I would be right back.

So I jumped in the car and put it in neutral, letting it roll out of the driveway slowly, down to the end of the street. I didn’t want to draw any more attention to the fact that I was leaving. I started the engine as soon as got the second corner and quickly sped away. Lynn lived in the Kensington District of San Diego. This is  one of the nicer areas of the city, so I knew there was no place around there to buy any dope. I mean it wasn’t like the hood, where there was a friendly neighborhood street pharmacist standing on every corner ready to serve. I had to get to City Heights. One of the roughest ghettos in southern California and it was no place to take lightly, especially at night! I did sixty the whole way there. I mean, I made it all the way from Kensington to 43
rd
and Fairmont in twelve minutes without getting pulled over by the cops. That had to be one for the Guinness Book of world records. When I pulled up there were three Latin Gangstas posted up against the side of a run down building. One of them saw that I was sitting there at the stop sign trying to get there attention. They figured that I either had to be a cop, or some bougie bitch from El Cerrito or somewhere trying to score some dope. Then one of them said something to the other two in Spanish and they all laughed. 

“Whaz-up ma? What ‘chu need baby?” The little dark haired thug said as he walked over and leaned into the driver’s side window of the car. He looked around and then checked the back seat to make sure I wasn’t five-0.

“Got some china white?” I asked nervously. I couldn’t believe what I was doing!

“China White? Goddamn ma! You fuckin’ wit dat real shit! You gotta be outta yo…!” He said as I abruptly cut him off.

“Mutha’fucka! Do you got it or not?” I shouted at the dark haired gangsta! By then I was really starting to feel the effects of the withdrawals and my patience was running short. For a minute I musta’ forgot what type of person I was dealing with, because before I could finish my sentence the Latin gangsta had pulled a gun from up under his white-T, and wedged it between my chin and throat. I was already sweating like I had just run the miracle mile, but now my sweat ran cold as my life flashed before my eyes.

“Better pump yo’ brakes bitch! I should rob yo’ pretty ass, but no… You know what I’m gonna do instead? I’m gon’ hook you up wit’ this real shit! Yeah… cuz once you get a hit of this, you gon’ be in love…. Every time you get a dollah’, you gon’ be runnin’ back to El Cajun to holla’ at me... So. See bitch? I ain’t even gotta’ rob you…  I’m already in yo’ pockets, and as soon as yo’ money runs out, I’m gon’ be all up in that lil’ tight pussy a’ yours… makin’ you moan.” He said, grinning, and looking back at his homeboys as I started to cry.

So I made the buy. Then, I sped the fuck outta’ El Cajun. I was aching all over. My nose was running and I had the worst case of chills.

I was dope sick and could barely see straight enough to drive! I’d only made it as far as 47
th
and Meade before I had to pull over and take my medicine. I looked around making sure nobody was walking by and that no cops were rolling through. Once I made sure the coast was clear I took the key out of the ignition and stuck it down into the plastic. I scooped out some powder, and put it up to my nose and snorted once, twice, and then again. I felt the dust hit my sinus and start to tingle, I sneezed and then… almost immediately I felt the calm, the rush, as the aches started to subside. My pain felt further and further away.