Reclaiming Nick (26 page)

Maggy touched Cole’s leg, anguish on her face. Her braids hung in a disheveled mess, and in the fluorescent lights she looked ashen.

He took her by the shoulders and lowered her onto a nearby chair, crouched before her. “What is it?”

She took a deep breath.

“You’re really scaring me, Mags.” He couldn’t look at Cole.

“Nick . . . Cole’s dying.”

Words sucked out of him, his mouth dry.

Her eyes filled, and she didn’t bother to wipe away her tears. “He’s got liver failure.”

“What?” He gasped, as if he’d been hit, but he couldn’t wrap his mind around her words. He stood, backing away from her,
suddenly aware of the sound of Cole’s breathing machine, the beep of the monitors. The roaring in his head. “Cole hasn’t had a drink in his life.”

“It’s not cirrhosis. They don’t know why. They’ve done dozens of tests, but they don’t know what’s causing it. All we know is that if he doesn’t get a new liver he’ll die. Soon.”

Maggy faced him, and only her steady, almost clinical voice made Nick hear her. How could she be so calm? “I don’t understand. How long have you known?”

“Only a short while. And CJ doesn’t know at all. Cole’s been having symptoms for a couple years now. Weakness, brittle bones, bleeding, depression, jaundice.”

“You should have told me.”

The look on her face made him want to crawl into a hole. He cringed, loathing himself. “I should have been here,” he amended. He crouched before her again, feeling very, very close to erupting, wanting desperately to hit something. “Maggy, I am so, so sorry for what I did. I’m sorry for hurting you. I feel sick about it. Please forgive me.”

Maggy covered her mouth with her hands. Then she nodded. Her voice dropped to just above a whisper. “Of course, Nick. Cole and I forgave you years ago.”

He simply stared at her.

She touched his cheek. “Cole loved you like a . . . a brother. And you were . . . well, you knew I loved you.” Her face twitched, and she managed the saddest of smiles.

“I don’t deserve friends like you,” Nick said, barely able to dredge up his voice.

Maggy’s smile fell, and she bowed her head, looking at her hands. “Actually, Nick, I need to ask you something.”

“Anything.”

She swallowed, but no words came.

“Maggy, what is it?” He touched her chin, tipping up her face.

“Cole needs a liver donor.”

Nick nodded.

“And . . . well, a liver donor can be a live donor.”

“What about CJ?” Nick got to his feet, hope filling him. “Is he a match?”

Maggy licked her lips, and if it were possible, she went even more pale. “No . . . CJ’s not a match. But . . . you could be.”

Nick felt like the floor had opened up or moved beneath him. He had to steady himself on the end of Cole’s bed as he asked, “What do you . . . mean?”

Maggy sucked in a breath and smiled. “Cole is your brother.”

“What . . . are you . . . talking about?” He knew his voice was louder than it should be in a hospital. “What are you talking about, Maggy!” He felt a remnant of anger begin to surface, something ugly and hard and overpowering.

Maggy’s smile vanished, and a look of pleading came over her as she stood up. “Please, Nick, hear me out.”

He clenched his jaw, forcing himself to stand there.

She licked her lips, put her hand to her chest, and glanced down at Cole. “Your dad told me.”

“What?”

“Yes. Well . . . sorta. Actually, he told Saul. And I was there. I heard him.”

“What exactly did you hear?” Nick recognized his tone from his cop days but didn’t retract it.

Maggy’s voice shook. “The day Saul and John came over to
finalize the will, I was there, taking care of your dad. I went out to get your father some tea, like he asked. When I came back, he was talking to Saul. He told him that he wanted to give Cole in death what he couldn’t in life—a part of the Noble legacy. He told Saul that Cole was his son, that while your mom was in the hospital during the early days of her pregnancy, he’d had an affair—”

“That is not true!” Nick thundered.

Maggy jerked, but she recovered fast, catching him before he could turn and stalk away. He tried to shrug her away, but she held on like a bulldogger. “It is true. Think about it. He was always including Cole in everything you all did. And he supported Cole and his mother for years. I found deposits in Irene’s account after I took over the books.”

Nick turned, casting a look at Cole. “Why didn’t Cole tell me?”

“I don’t think he knows. Bishop said he hadn’t told anyone, and Irene had promised to keep it quiet for Elizabeth’s sake too. Irene’s brother worked at the Buckle, and he was the only family she had. She didn’t want to leave . . . so she stayed, and Bishop took care of her, of Cole. But Cole has never said a word, so . . .”

Nick narrowed his eyes, unable to fathom the depths of Maggy’s duplicity. “You’ve known all this time, and you didn’t tell anyone? What else are you keeping from me?” He gestured to Cole. “From us?”

Maggy let go of him and wrapped her arms around herself, as if trying to hold herself together. “Nick, you’re Cole’s brother. And his only hope for a liver match. Please, please will you get tested? To save his life?”

Nick’s attention went from Cole to Maggy and back as he turned
her words over in his mind. Cole was his brother? He sighed as the emotions caught up to him. “Did my mother know?”

Maggy shook her head. “I don’t know. But this mistake changed Bishop. He became the father you knew because he felt sick about his sins and asked God to make him a new man. He told Saul all of this and how he longed for years to tell you, how he hoped that someday you and Cole could share the land you both loved so much.”

Nick wanted to close his ears, but even as she spoke, he saw himself and Cole, riding side by side, the opposite ends of one pole. Cole, dependable, patient; Nick, passionate, reckless. Both of them loving cowboying. Loving the Silver Buckle. Hoping to be the men Bishop challenged them to be.

Not only that, but as he looked at Maggy, he remembered the grief he’d felt over Cole as he’d taken her into his arms in the waiting room. Because of that moment, perhaps he might understand, however briefly, how his father had felt after Elizabeth died. Alone. Needing someone to bear it with him.

Someone he’d once loved.

Nick looked at Maggy, pleading through those beautiful eyes that had always believed in him, even when he didn’t deserve it. “He is my brother, isn’t he?” he said softly.

Maggy’s face tore with emotion, and she nodded.

“I’ve been a fool.”

Maggy shook her head and shrugged, apparently not sure what to say.

Nick blew out a breath, clinging to the barest grip on his emotions. “How could I have not seen this? My brother.” He stared at Cole, seeing the solid, nearly stubborn chin. And if it weren’t written
on his face, the Noble character filled Cole’s veins. Cole had turned out more like Bishop than Nick had ever been.

Finally, Nick could make Bishop proud of him. Be the Noble he should be. “Okay, I’ll do it. Find the doctor.”

“Oh, Nick, thank you!”

Before he could brace himself, she launched herself into his arms, burying her face into his neck, sobbing.

He pulled her tight. “It’s going to be okay, Maggy. It’s going to be okay.”

Piper stood at the end of the hallway, calling herself stupid as she watched Nick hold Maggy. Tears slicked her eyes, and she blinked them away, hating herself for getting this far in over her head. She hated hospitals—the smells and textures and noises of people gasping for air. Including herself.

She beelined back to the waiting room, where Lolly and John waited with CJ. Lolly smoothed CJ’s hair as he slept on her lap. John had his arm around her.

“How is he?” Lolly asked.

“Fine. They’re all fine.”

Lolly quirked a penciled eyebrow.

Piper didn’t elaborate. She sat in a vinyl chair, incredulous at how she’d been roped into flying to Sheridan. Clearly, Stefanie didn’t know her brother nor his true feelings about the women in his life. Piper should have listened to her instincts and packed her bags.

After all, she had the evidence she needed right here on digital recording. “What do you think? Who was the real murderer?” she’d asked.

“Me,” Nick had answered. Me.

Her chest burned, and she pushed the feeling away. She couldn’t wait to put her piece together and submit it. Wanted: Justice relished this type of story—a cop gone over the edge. She’d gotten what she’d come looking for—Nick’s confession.

So it wasn’t exactly a confession. And was it really what she’d come to the Silver Buckle to find?

It didn’t matter. She’d land her new job, move to Seattle, and forget everything about Nick Noble and his deceptions.

She winced, rubbing her eyes. She needed coffee before someone else got hurt. She pushed to her feet. “I’m going to find the cafeteria. Need anything?”

Lolly frowned at her tone. “Nope.”

Piper said nothing as she marched down the hall. She’d get a coffee, a salad, then call Carter and get on the next flight out of Dodge.

CHAPTER 18

C
OLE FULLY EXPECTED
to wake up in heaven. So when he opened his eyes to the sun turning the bedsheets flaxen, the sound of a respirator, and Maggy asleep near the foot of his bed, he wasn’t sure whether to rejoice or cry.

He reached down and touched her head, twining her auburn hair through his fingers. She stirred, and he wondered how he’d gotten so lucky as to spend the last ten years with her. Her eyes fluttered open, and he watched her scramble to place her surroundings.

Apparently last night had also caught her by surprise. Why couldn’t he have peacefully gone to sleep while staring at the stars from the bed of his truck? His mother had gone in her sleep, and now he saw what a blessing it had been for them all. At least he’d seen CJ win—God had answered that prayer. After seeing Maggy and Nick together while watching CJ win his event, Cole knew he was ready. Nick would watch over them. When Maggy got the land from Bishop’s will, she’d at least have choices. She could marry
Nick or move. And that’s all Cole had wished for her. Choices. A future.

Now, as Maggy raised her head, gave him a smile, he didn’t know what to think. She sat up and twined her fingers through his, setting their hands on the soft cotton sheets. “Everything’s going to be okay, Cole.”

He nodded. Yes, it was. “I’ll always love you, you know.”

“Me too.” She scooted her chair closer. The sheets had left lines on her beautiful face, and her hair had abandoned her braids and curled deliciously around her head. She’d cried away any makeup, leaving only the sun’s color on her cheeks.

He’d miss her, and that thought nearly made him groan aloud. Instead he squeezed her hand. “Where’s CJ?”

She stretched her neck from side to side. “Last I saw him, he was asleep in the waiting room with Lolly and John and the others.” Maggy reached over to the table next to his bed. “Do you want some water?”

He caught her arm as she brought it to him. “Mags, is Nick here? I thought I heard him last night after they brought me in.”

Fear flashed across her face. “Did you hear what we were talking about?”

He’d been just below the surface of consciousness, but, yes, he’d heard Nick when he said, “It’ll be okay.” Cole knew instinctively what Nick meant. As in, “I’m here. I promise to stay by you.”

Cole ignored the pain and forced a smile. “It’s fine, Maggy. I want you to be happy.” His mouth felt dry. He reached for the water, but she jerked it away.

“What are you talking about?” Her voice sounded harsher than he thought it might—after all, her husband had just given her
permission to marry the man she loved. Seemed like she might be . . . well, sensitive to that situation.

“You and Nick. I understand. I give you my . . . my blessing.” He tried not to sound jaded, but it came out as he’d feared. Filled with hurt.

To his confusion, anger filled Maggy’s face. When she set down the cup, water splashed onto the table. “I can’t believe you. You think I want to be with Nick?”

Cole said nothing.

She shook her head and touched her fingers to her temples. “This is more serious than I thought. Apparently you need a brain transplant too!” She stood up, knocking the chair against the wall. “No, wait—you were serious the other day in the barn?” Her face twisted in disbelief. “You want me to marry Nick? Why? I don’t love Nick. I love you!”

“You’ve always loved Nick. He’s—”

“You don’t get it, do you? Love is an investment. It’s a lifetime of giving and sharing and . . . struggling. Yes, Nick was the man who introduced me to charm and passion and adventure, but you, Cole, taught me about patience and kindness and gentleness. You taught me that love is spending the night in the barn nursing a sick calf, riding out together in the quiet of a snowy morning, or sitting at home together under an afghan, rustling the pages of a good book. You taught me that it’s loving someone despite their mistakes and rushing them to the hospital and holding their hand as their life changes forever. And shouldering that responsibility, even though it isn’t yours. Yeah, I might have loved Nick once, but he was just a shadow of my love for you. A glimpse of what was waiting for me. I would never, ever marry Nick after being
with you.” She whisked tears from her cheeks and glared at her husband.

Oh. Cole licked his lips, his mouth prairie dry. To his dismay, his eyes began to burn. He looked down, refusing the rush of emotions.

Maggy sat on the bed. “I know you think I settled for you, Cole. But you’re my gift from God. You’re the proof that God loves me so very much.”

Cole ducked his head, closing his eyes, feeling her words seep into the parched places of his spirit. “I just wanted to give you what you deserved, Mags. This life is so hard—”

“This life is what I love. But I’d chuck it all for one more day with you. I love our land. But I love you more. I don’t care if we have to sell everything we have and I have to wait tables at Lolly’s—we’re going to have our happily ever after.”

He looked at her, a streak of cold rushing through him. “What are you talking about?”

She wore a tremulous smile. “I found you a donor.”

He heard the words but couldn’t feel them, couldn’t let them touch him for fear they’d vanish. “I don’t . . . how? I thought I was so far down on the list—”

“It’s Nick.”

Cole blinked at her, unable to take a full breath. “What? . . . I . . . I don’t understand.”

Maggy patted his chest. “I have to tell you something.” She took a breath; she looked as rattled as he did. “Nick is your brother, Cole. The day Bishop signed his will, I was there. And I overheard him talking to Saul. He told him everything—that when Elizabeth was here in Sheridan during her hospitalization, Bishop had a brief affair with your mother, who’d come to visit her brother—”

“Dutch.”

She nodded. “Well, Bishop felt sickened by what he’d done, and evidently it caused him to reach out for salvation, but Irene got pregnant. I know you always wondered why you never had a father, why your mother never told you. It’s because she promised to keep it quiet. I don’t know if Nick’s mom ever knew, but the last thing Bishop did was make you a part of the family. He left you that land so you could be the Noble you should have been.”

Maggy took his hand, her face softening, her eyes wet. “But you didn’t need the land or the name to prove that you’re a man of noble character.”

Cole took this in without speaking. He’d always known that Dutch was his uncle, and he’d filled in the gap for a father in so many ways. Cole’s face tightened into a frown as he replayed his past, all those mysterious Christmas presents, the money to buy his horse, Suds, the home and land his mother certainly couldn’t afford, the pickup that appeared on his eighteenth birthday after Nick had left for school.

He thought of the sporting events Bishop had always attended, how he’d treated both Nick and Cole to pizza, and the time he’d been in the audience during Cole’s band concert, even though Nick didn’t play an instrument. Nick had been right when he’d accused Cole of wanting Bishop to be his father too. Truthfully, the day Nick had found Bishop with his mother, Cole had hoped—more than he should have—that that dream might finally come true. As Cole’s mother’s health faded more each day—despite Bishop’s attention and the visits to doctors in Sheridan—Bishop became more than a boss to Cole. He’d wept at her bedside when she died. And
he’d put his arms around Cole at the graveside. Just like a father might do to his son.

“Bishop was my father?”

“And Nick is your brother. He was tested last night to see if he is a liver match for you.”

“Nick did that for me?” Cole shook his head. “But . . . did you tell him about Bishop? I guess you had to . . . but doesn’t he hate me?”

“I think, like you, he might have known all along. And, no. In fact, I think he’s relieved.”

Cole blew out a breath, squeezing her hand. “You can’t let him do this, Mags. It’s dangerous. He could die.”

“He’s cowboy enough for this. He knows what he’s doing.”

Cole looked at her hand, feeling the calluses, the hard work etched into her palms. “At least we have the land. We can sell it, pay for this.” A swell of gratitude for Bishop’s gift, even if it had been given in guilt, swept over him.

Maggy gave a feeble smile and looked down, tracing the IV taped to his hand. “Yeah . . .”

“This isn’t how I had it worked out. You were supposed to get the land and sell it—”

“Or marry Nick,” she said, her voice hard.

Cole shrugged. “He is CJ’s father.”

She shook her head. “No, you are.”

“Has Nick told CJ what he’s doing? CJ needs to know about Nick. I know we always said we’d tell him when the time was right. I think that’s now. . . . What is it?”

Maggy looked stricken, the blood draining from her face. “I don’t think Nick knows about him. He . . . he asked me if CJ would be a match for you.”

Cole went cold. “All these years he hasn’t known? But you wrote him that letter—you told him.” He cradled his head in his hands. “How could he not know?” All those lost years . . . “Maggy, I feel sick. We have to tell him. Nick has to know about CJ before he goes into surgery. What if something happens to him? He has to know—”

Maggy looked as if he’d struck her.

Cole lowered his voice. “I’m not doing this unless Nick knows about CJ. Unless he’s given the choice. He might not want to go through with it if he knows he has a son.”

A knock came at the door, but Maggy didn’t move.

Cole stared at her, willing her to agree.

She tightened her jaw as a nurse entered and said, “It’s time, Mr. St. John.”

“What? No—wait. I’m not ready.”

Doctor Lowe appeared one step behind the nurse. He was dressed in surgical scrubs, scuffies on his feet. “Good morning, Cole.” He wore a smile that Cole didn’t feel. “You are a lucky man today. Normally I wouldn’t recommend a live-donor transplant without the donor having sufficient time to consider the situation. But your brother is not only a perfect match—with six out of six HLA proteins—he’s in excellent physical condition. And he’s persuasive.”

Cole knew how persuasive Nick could be. Gratitude washed over him, wrecking his voice. But he couldn’t let go of Maggy’s hand. “Maggy and I have some unfinished business.”

The nurse moved over to lower his bed, put down the rails.

Panic filled Cole’s grip. “Wait—I want to see CJ.”

Maggy came close, brushed her lips across his forehead. “I’ll get him.”

He didn’t let her go. “Mags, you have to tell him—”

“Shh.” She pressed her lips to his, gently, sweetly, conjuring up so many memories. “Nick isn’t going to change his mind. Not when his brother needs him.” She pulled away, stepped back while two attendants wheeled in a gurney.

“Maggy, promise me that if anything happens—”

“Nothing’s going to happen.”

“—you’ll tell Nick everything.” He grimaced as the attendants moved him to the gurney.

Maggy sighed. “Be strong, Cole. I need you. CJ needs you. And we love you.”

He gazed at her, frustration turning him inside out as they rolled him away.

Nick had had a chest X-ray, an EKG, an ultrasound, a CT scan, been poked, sucked of blood, starved, and this last humiliation made him want to hit something.

“Okay, Mr. Noble, you’re all set for surgery.” The nurse coiled up the tube and did the favor of not looking at him as she lowered his sheets and patted his leg.

His face felt ten shades of red, and he didn’t roll over until she exited. No one ever said the E-word when he’d agreed to this last night.

Then again, last night he’d been overwrought with emotion, not thinking clearly. But even in the light of day, he wouldn’t change his mind. Not after he spent half the night pleading his case to Doctor Lowe. How he’d probably been ready for this his entire life, how God had brought him back, maybe for this reason alone.

Nick had another brother. It made him think of Rafe, of losing him, and he’d asked Stefanie to call him. Just . . . in case.

Nick rolled over, adjusting himself on the hospital bed. They’d given him a single room, probably wanting to keep him free from infection before surgery. Outside, clouds streaked a beautiful blue sky, and he made out the Bighorn Mountains.