Road Trip (3 page)

“I used to think he didn't,” I told her.

“Me too,” added Allie.

Then I proceeded to tell these kids about how I questioned God and life and just about everything until I got so depressed and desperate that I cried out to God to help me. I told them about meeting God in the graveyard—how I stumbled upon Clay Berringer's gravesite and the powerful words on his headstone. “Jesus said, 4 am the way and the truth and the life,’”I quoted to them. “He said, 4fo one comes to the father except through
me.’” I then explained how reassuring this was to me personally—just knowing that Jesus is the One who paid the price for me to have a relationship with God.

It wasn't so different from what I say at concerts when it's my turn to share my testimony. But somehow, sitting by the campf ire with these kids listening right next to me, it felt more real than ever. And I suppose I spoke with an urgency that I don't normally feel. Ky face flushed with intensity, or maybe it was the heat of the campf ire, but I felt almost embarrassed when I finished. Not from speaking the truth, but from being a little pushy.

“Sorry,”I said quickly. “I didn't mean to sound all preachy or anything.”

“It's okay,” said Brian. “A lot of what you said makes sense. I guess I've felt the same way sometimes.”

“me too,” echoed another girl who'd been quiet until then.

“It's kind of like this song…” said Allie.

I tossed her a warning look. Ho way did I want this evening to turn into a mini concert.

“Aw, come on, Ghloe,” she urged me. “Can't we sing ‘Stubborn Love’ to them?”

Laura nudged me with her elbow. “Yeah, aren't we supposed to sing around the campf ire, Ghloe?”

Willy snickered as he pulled a sleepy little Davie onto his lap.

“Okay.”I sighed and picked up my guitar then started strumming. “You guys might be sorry you stopped by. Who knows, we might end up singing “Kum Ba Yah” or something equally lame before the night is over.”

So the three of us sang “Stubborn Love,” and when we finished, the kids actually began to clap.

“That was so cool,” said Stacie.

“Yeah,” agreed another girl. “You guys are really good.”

“Sing another one,” urged Brian.

I noticed some movement in the shadows beyond the campf ire and looked up to see several bystanders lurking about. “Hey, you guys might as well join us,” I called out. And so we sang a few more songs, and believe it or not, we even ended the evening by singing “Kum Ba Yah.”

Pretty funny. Actually, it was pretty cool. We talked a little more, and I think some of the things we shared were sinking in. I plan to pray for the new friends we made today—that God will chase them down with His stubborn love.

(DRIVING INTO NEVADA)

It's funny to imagine our friends back in school today. Gan't say that I envy them, stuck in those suffocating classrooms while summer continues to lurk outside their windows. It still feels as though we're on vacation. Okay, a working vacation.

Anyway, we're heading to Reno right now. Not to gamble but to perform. I suppose that's a bit of a gamble though. I mean, it seems as if the day could come when all we get are lemons—like a crowd that really hates us. I'm not even sure what I'd do if that actually happened. But I've dreamed it before. Actually, it was more of a nightmare.

We're standing onstage, and I can't remember how to play my guitar, and the whole audience is booing and throwing shoes and stuff at us. It's so humiliating. When I wake up, I try to remind myself that we're performing for God, not man, and if people quit liking us at least God still will. Even so, that nightmare always leaves me feeling unsettled and insecure. As a result, I'm sure I push Allie and Laura even harder when we
rehearse the next day. But it's not nearly as hard as I push myself.

We drove through Donner Pass this morning— the place where the settlers got stranded in the snow and ate each other. Well, I'm sure that's oversimplifying the whole thing, but it does leave you with an eerie feeling. I don't care how hungry I was, I don't think I could ever resort to eating a human. It was hard to imagine that such a tragedy could've occurred in a place that looked so pretty and green and.peaceful. But we saw photos of how it looks when the snows come, and it's a totally different scene.

Laura was feeling somewhat relieved today, since we were able to pick up her prescription to help her sleep. I sure hope it works. She's been getting pretty cranky lately. Allie told me it's really due to the fact that Ryan Hall hasn't e-mailed her since August.

“Laura's afraid he's going to forget all about her in college,” Allie whispered as we lounged in the back bedroom, supposedly working on lyrics.

“Kaybe it would be for the best,” I said. “Then she could focus more on our music.”

“Don't tell her that.”

“I guess I didn't realize she had it that bad for him.” I frowned as I tweaked a word in the second stanza.

“Yeah, sometimes it's hard to tell with Laura.
She's pretty good at keeping her feelings hidden, you know?”

“I suppose.” But it surprised me a little that she'd shared this tidbit with Allie and not me. Now as I write this, I'm trying not to feel jealous because I'm glad that Laura told someone. But at the same time, it makes me feel a little on the outside of things. But I suppose she thinks I wouldn't understand since I'm the one who's always saying we need to put our music first, especially now that we're officially on tour. (I mean, first over guys—not Godi)

Hopefully, her sleeping pills will help her get some rest and she'll start acting like her old self again. While I personally don't like the idea of using medications for anything (I hardly ever take an aspirin, but that's just me), in Laura's case I can understand. She's been so stressed and tired that I'm sure it's not good for her to continue like that. It's not good for any of us. Kaybe her little blue pills will make the difference.

Allie is still her lively old happy fun-loving self. And as usual, this is rubbing Laura all wrong. Lately, she's been getting irritated at Allie for almost everything. Like talking too much or bouncing around the RV like a Superball—just the normal Allie stuff. But I feel sorry for Allie too. I know she feels cooped up and gets tired of being
picked on for her “vivacious” personality.

As a result, she often chooses to ride in Willy's little RV. But I know he appreciates the company. In some ways I think Willy is becoming a real father figure for Allie, and that's cool. I can tell that Elise really appreciates his influence.

Anyway, this calms things down in here a lot, and I can usually manage to get some songwriting done while Allie's gone. Of course, there's still Davie to contend with, but Elise does a pretty good job of keeping him occupied. It's funny because Elise, although energetic, is a fairly calm and controlled sort of person, but her kids, as sweet as they both are, are still a handful at times. In fact, I overheard Elise talking to Allie yesterday while we were packing things up after our camping trip.

“Kaybe you should consider going back on your Ritalin,” she said in a quiet voice. I'm sure she didn't realize that I was just around the corner shaking pine needles from my sleeping bag.

“Why?” Allie asked in this slightly whiny voice that she always reserves especially for her mom.

“I think your hyperactivity gets on Laura's nerves,” continued Elise. “I'm sure you don't realize it, honey, but you can be pretty irritating sometimes.”

“But I hate how those pills make me feel, Kom.
It's like they completely sap ray energy, not to mention ray creative juices. You know how they turn me into Zombie Girl.”

“But they do calm you down.”

Allie sighed loudly. “Okay, fine! But how about if I try to calm myself down without the pills first? Maybe I could tape my mouth shut and put a pillow over ray head. Would that make you happy?”

“Oh, Allie.”

“Then maybe you guys would quit picking on me.”

“I'm not trying to pick on you. I'm just trying to-”

“I know, Mora. You're just trying to help.”

“Well, the pills are in the medicine cabinet if you change your mind.”

Poor Allie. I shook ray head as I finished rolling up the sleeping bag. But I don't blame her a bit. I sure wouldn't want to have to take pills to calm me down either. It's weird to think that Laura needs pills to help her sleep and Allie needs pills to calm her down. Sheesh!

But I must agree with Allie on this. I think she's perfectly fine without her Ritalin. In fact, life would be sadly boring if Allie suddenly started acting all quiet and calm—or grumpy like Laura. I guess I need to let Allie know that I like her just the way she is—live wire or not. Allie is just Allie, and that's okay by me.

(DRIVING THROUGH N0 MAN'S LAND)

It's pretty bleak and barren out here in western Nevada. I think they used to test nuclear bombs somewhere around here, back in the dark ages, or maybe it was the fifties. And as opposed as I am to weapons of any kind, particularly nuclear, I could almost understand how those scientists mightfve assumed that there was nothing they could hurt out here in the middle of nowhere. It is so desolate.

And yet the more I look out upon it, the more I'm starting to appreciate it—the rock formations, cactuses, and warm desert colors. I guess
it's starting to grow on me. The scenery is sort of hauntingly lonely, and it makes me wonder how I would feel if I were out here all by myself. Just God and me, hanging out in the desert together.

Naturally, these are the kinds of thoughts I keep to myself. I don't think either Allie or Laura would understand completely. I know they think I'm a little extreme sometimes. But maybe Willy would since he's had some interesting experiences during his somewhat unconventional life. And perhaps Rosy would too, being a lady truck driver and all. I imagine her as something of a free spirit.

Well, Laura's sleeping pill seemed to work just fine last night. In fact, she was so knocked out this morning that Rosy took off driving down the highway even before Laura woke up. We decided not to disturb her since she's been so exhausted lately. Elise said it'll probably take her a few days to catch up on her z's.

It didn't help matters that we were out rather late last night. I think we're all fairly worn out. Our concert was at a big church in Reno, and we'd agreed to meet with the kids in the youth group and answer questions afterward. I think we all lost track of the time because it was nearly midnight when the youth pastor told us we'd have to call it quits. But it was fun seeing the excitement of this youth group.

They're launching a “Reach Out to Reno” campaign for the fall. Their goal is to touch every high school kid with the gospel by Christmas. It's a pretty huge undertaking, but they seem to be up for it. We promised to pray for them as well as have Willy look into the possibility of returning here for another concert at the end of the year. I'm not sure how that will go since it seems our schedule is already pretty much booked up. At least that's what Willy said.

“You girls are almost finished with your break-in tour,” he told us at lunchtime today.

I pointed to a zit that has just emerged on my forehead. “You mean our breakout tour.”

“Gross,” said Laura. “I'm trying to eat here.”

Allie poked me in the arm. “Told you not to scarf down those chili fries last night.”

“Anyway…” I could tell Willy was trying to get us back on track. “A couple more gigs and we're heading to Los Angeles.”

I watched Allie's eyes grow big at the sound of that. We all know that LA is supposed to be the big turning point in our career, the place where we go from county fair fledglings to legitimate concert musicians.

“So when do we get to meet them, Willy?” Allie drummed her fingers on the table. “When's the big day?”

Willy attempted to look confused. “Who?”

“You know who.” Allie tossed her straw at him. “Iron Cross. The Baxter Boys. Jeremy and Isaiah, for Pete's sake.”

“Oh, them.” Willy nodded as he stroked his chin. “Well, you girls are scheduled to open for them on September 24.”

“Wow, that's only a couple of weeks off,” said Allie. “You really think we're ready for the big time, Willy?”

“The powers that be at Omega Records seem to think so. And they've scheduled about five days before the concert for you girls to practice up. Eric Green will be flying out in the middle of the week to determine whether or not you're ready for this.”

“What if we're not?” Laura still looked slightly groggy, but at least she wasn't too cranky.

“We will be,” I assured them. “We'll start practicing our vocals more on the road. And we'll spend more time warming up before our concerts. I suppose we've gotten a little lazy.”

“Lazy?” echoed Laura. “I feel like I've never worked harder in my life.”

“Okay, maybe 'lazy' isn't the right word. But I think we can use the next couple of weeks to really improve. I know I don't want to embarrass Iron Cross with a mediocre performance.”

Allie nodded. “I'm game.”

Laura nodded too, but her enthusiasm level seemed lower than usual. Hopefully she'll get better with a few more good nights of sleep.

So we spent the rest of the afternoon working on vocals and memorizing lyrics and daydreaming about the night when we'll actually open for Iron Gross. It still feels too good to be true.