Rock Hard: A Bad Boy Rock Star Romance (18 page)

I needed to get out there and find Mia, and figure out exactly why she’d left in the middle of the night. More than anything I prayed that I’d be able to convince her to give me another chance.

“I have to get going man. Lock up after me?” I asked.

“Sure thing. Good luck with your piece of tail!”

I winced as I walked out of the bus. Mia was so much more than just another piece of tail, but that’s just the way Blake looked at the world. If you’re a hammer then everything you see is a nail. If you’re Blake then every girl you see at a concert is a potential groupie to be wined, dined, banged, and tossed back.

I wasn’t going to be like that, though. Things were going to be different this time. I just prayed that my reputation wasn’t finally going to catch up with me and ruin my first true chance at something real.

18: Back to Reality

I sat in my cubicle staring at my monitor. I was moving numbers around in a spreadsheet, but I was having one hell of a hard time focusing on said spreadsheet.

I looked over to my second monitor which was just showing the desktop. The desktop that was sporting a wallpaper featuring the boys from Twenty Promises. It was from their new tour. I downloaded it first thing this morning.

I'm not sure what compelled me to do that. Maybe I just had to see him. Only it was turning into pure torture every time I looked over. Pure torture and pure bliss. I kept thinking about last night, about how out of character everything I'd done was. I kept thinking about how incredible he felt with his body pressed against mine. And more than anything I kept kicking myself and thinking how stupid I was to sneak out when I did.

Even as another part of me knew that it had to be done. It was just a one night stand. It couldn't be any more than that because of who he was and what he did. I didn't want to get too emotionally invested. I definitely didn't want him to get too emotionally invested. He was on tour, and it wouldn't work out.

Still, last night had been so damn fun!

"Enjoying the picture of your new boyfriend?"

"I told you he's not my boyfriend you bit…"

I realized too late that it was my boss Rachel standing behind me. Her arms were crossed she stared down at me from over her glasses. She had her hair done up behind her in a bun and overall it gave her a very severe stern librarian vibe.

"Sorry Rachel," I said. "I thought you were someone else."

"And I thought you were someone else last night," she said. "I almost didn't recognize the studious buttoned up workaholic on those big screens!"

She leaned into my cubicle with a decidedly non-stern-librarian looking grin on her face all of a sudden. She glanced around as though she was making sure there was nobody listening in on us. Meanwhile, I blinked. She mentioned monitors. She couldn't possibly be…

Only there was only one thing I could think of that would have her grinning like that. Sure boss lady was pretty easy-going when it came to running her ship despite the stern librarian thing, but she also wasn't one to break out in spontaneous smiles like that. I wondered if she went to the concert with a daughter or something.

"Why don't you come back to my office?"

"Sure," I said, not quite sure where this was leading.

I took a nervous seat in her office. I wondered how much she'd seen last night. Obviously a lot if she was alluding to seeing me on the monitors which meant she probably saw me up on stage.

"Go ahead and close the door Mia," she said.

The office was small enough that I just had to reach behind me and swing the door shut and then I was all alone with my boss. Something that had never happened before whether for good or bad.

Rachel leaned over her desk and regarded me through her glasses for a moment. Then the huge grin was back.

"So tell me," she said. "What was it like being that close to Grant?"

I blinked and said the first thing that came to mind, though it probably wasn't the right thing to say. "I can't believe you were at the concert."

"What?" She looked a little insulted. "Do I look too old to enjoy a Twenty Promises concert or something? Keep in mind they were huge just as I was getting out of high school and going into college. You couldn't go to a party without hearing their music! Sure the guys always complained, but they always played it if they wanted to get some play. And Grant was so hot back then!"

She stopped to think about that for a moment and then amended her estimation of Grant. "Come to think of it, he's still pretty damn hot!"

I was inclined to agree with her estimation of Grant's hotness. I knew firsthand just how fucking hot he was. More so than my boss could ever dream of. I'd seen it up close and personal, after all.

And suddenly all of that nervous energy left me. I felt like I was in a safe place. I'd already talked about it with Kayla, leaving out the part where I'd bailed rather than getting kicked out, but I figured I could share some of my experiences with another fan.

I blinked. Another fan? Did that mean I was a Twenty Promises fan now?

Well, even if I didn't particularly care for their music I was sure as hell a fan of Grant. I could at least admit to that much.

I grinned. "It was amazing! Having him sing to me like that, being up there on stage…"

"And what about the stuff later backstage?" Rachel asked with a grin plastered across her face.

I clenched my chair and leaned forward. "Kayla told you about that? That traitorous bitch! I'm going to kill her!"

I didn't even know Kayla knew my boss. She worked in a completely different department and she'd have to go looking for her to have that conversation. I was so embarrassed. I was going to kill my friend! Only Rachel was laughing, which made me pause in my potentially unfair hatred of my best friend. She was looking at me with a twinkle in her eyes.

"I don't know Kayla, and I didn't know whether or not anything happened last night backstage. I just wondered. Now I know for sure though!"

That brought me up short. My mouth snapped shut and I realized what an idiot I'd been. She was just fishing for information, and I'd seen that bait and thought to myself "that looks delicious." I'd taken it hook, line, and sinker.

Damn it!

"Backstage was pretty fun," I said. "We got a tour and we sat it on a fan meet and greet and even got to go to their after party. All in all it was pretty cool!"

Rachel cocked an eyebrow at me. "And that's all that happened backstage?"

"Yeah," I sighed.

I hoped that sight made it sound like I was wistfully thinking of other things that I would've enjoyed happening with Grant backstage. I just wasn't ready to discuss all of that with my boss. Kayla, sure, she'd been there and she'd been my friend my entire life. My boss who I was friendly with at work but otherwise didn't know all that well?

Yeah, fat chance she was getting any of the really good gossip.

Besides, it's not like I was telling a lie. Not exactly. Nothing had happened backstage, strictly speaking. Unless you counted that time that he came up behind me while we were looking out at the chanting crowd.

No, all the fun stuff, the stuff she was asking about with her implied question, happened on the tour bus. And she hadn't asked me what happened on the tour bus so I figured I could give her my answer with a clean conscience.

Rachel pouted and suddenly looked very disappointed. "That's it?"

That came very close to a question that I couldn't answer honestly with a little bit of obfuscation. Still, I wasn't going to spill everything to my boss. It just wasn't appropriate for the workplace. Particularly considering that everything I'd done at the concert the night before didn't exactly paint me in a very responsible light.

Meeting a rock star, going off to his tour bus, having a little bit of ill advised fun where I was nothing more than a glorified groupie no matter how into it, no matter how into me, he'd seemed? Yeah, that wasn't exactly the kind of thing that would be great for my long-term employment prospects once the gossip got around the office.

Although Rachel didn't look very disappointed. She still had that pout on her face. She looked more like Kayla last night in the car on the ride home when she was asking for details than a lady who was pushing thirty and probably shouldn't have been out at that concert anyways!

"That's too bad," she said. "The way he was looking at you while you were up on the stage with him last night, the way he seemed to be searching for you, it made me think there was something going on there."

There’d certainly been the potential for something to be going on there, but it wasn't going to happen. Not now. Not after I'd run. Only I couldn't very well tell her that I was regretting my decision to leave him behind last night after a one night stand. No, that was edging too close to territory that was the kind of thing I shouldn't be sharing with my boss even if I was sort of bursting to tell someone other than Kayla.

I resisted the urge to spill though. Something about the way she was leaning forward also told me that the instant I spilled it would be all over the office. Behind my back, to be sure, but wasn't that the worst kind of gossip?

"No, I'm afraid nothing happened other than the autograph session and the party in the Quarterback Lounge," I lied. "There was absolutely nothing going on between me and Grant last night.

"That's a shame," she said. "You were living the dream."

I winced, but I tried my best not to show it. Kayla, and now my boss. Two women telling me that I was living the dream. And for one heady moment the night before I had felt like I was living the dream. I felt like I'd found a fun guy who was interesting to talk to, who surprised me, and who was so fucking sexy. So fucking good in bed!

He was everything I was looking for in a man, except for the pesky fact that he was the lead of a band that I absolutely despised until last night. He was considered the sexiest member of a band that was regularly on tour where he could pull any girl he wanted.

No, whatever happened between me and Grant had been fun, but it was just that. Passing fun. And no amount of wishing was going to change that even if he had felt like the perfect guy for one brief shining moment.

Rachel's desk phone started to ring. I glanced at it and she did as well, but then she looked back. "I can ignore it. I need to hear more about last night."

I shrugged. The phone stopped ringing. "There's really nothing to say. I got an autograph and that was it. There's nothing between me and Grant. You must've been imagining things."

The phone started ringing again and Rachel looked down in annoyance. "I told them never to bother me when my door was closed…" she muttered.

She did pick up the phone though. I could hear excited squealing from the other side. Now that was interesting. Usually the receptionist didn't get that worked up about anything, and yet I was pretty sure that was her voice shrieking into the receiver so loud that Rachel had to pull away ever so slightly.

Whatever was going on, this had to be very interesting.

"Really? Are you sure?" Rachel asked.

More buzzing from the phone. So loud that I could almost make out the words. Almost, but not quite. Rachel nodded a couple of times, mumbling into the phone.

Then she put her hand over the receiver. "Are you absolutely sure there was nothing between you and Grant last night?" she asked, a mischievous twinkle in her eye. A mischievous twinkle that suddenly had me on guard. That suddenly had me very worried. That suddenly had excitement warring with a sick feeling deep in my stomach.

There was something about that expression that didn't bode well for me. There was something about that excited expression that had me just as excited, wondering if it was even possible.

"Um, maybe?" I said, still not wanting to give anything away on the off chance she was still fishing for gossip.

"Well that "nothing" that happened between the two of you the night before must've been one hell of a “nothing,” because he's down at reception asking for you. At least I'm pretty sure he's asking for you. You're the only Mia that we have working at this company, after all."

I held up a hand, wanting to stop her. Wanting to somehow stop him from getting any farther than the reception desk. Only Rachel still had that mischievous twinkle in her eye. She looked down to the receiver. "Go ahead and send him through."

I sighed. She put the receiver down. She looked up at me and cocked an eyebrow.

"Sorry, but I'm very interested in seeing this!"

To be perfectly honest so was I. Rachel nodded towards her office door and I stood, ready to go out where he would be coming up any moment now. I felt so nervous. I felt weak in the knees. What was he doing here. How could he possibly know where I worked? Why had he tracked me down?

And above all of that, why was this giving me a ridiculous hope?

I opened the door to Rachel's office and stepped out.

Word must have traveled fast. It looked like the receptionist had told everybody in the cube farm what was happening. Women were popping up like prairie dogs and looking around in anticipation. And I was surprised to find a flash of jealousy at their behavior. I was surprised by the sudden possessive streak that went racing through me as I saw them looking around in obvious anticipation.