Romance: Western Mail Order Bride "Bethany's Love"-Clean Christian Historical Romance (Western Mail Order Bride Short Shorties Series) (143 page)

“Have I?”

“I’m afraid you have.  You’re right, I was angry when you asked about the children, but not at you.  I was angry at myself.”

“But whatever for?”

“Because their mother’s death was my fault.  I did not know her and because of my lack of generosity I never did know her.  She came to my door with her three small children.  So small, they looked too small to even be real to me then.  She came asking for money or food, something like that.  I didn’t even listen well enough to find out.  I was busy and preoccupied with ranch matters and I turned her away.  A few days later, she turned up dead.  I guess nobody else had wanted to help her either.  The children were going to be put in a home but I took them in.  I took them in as my own.  I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want you to know how shameful I felt.  I knew that if I told you, you would never be able to love me.”

“Do you want me to love you?”

Now it was her turn to be surprised.  It hadn’t occurred to her that he would even care about what she thought. 

“Well, yes.  I do.  I’ve been hoping that you would.  I don’t see how you could’ve known that, what with the way I’ve been acting.  But I would sure love it if you loved me back.”

“I do!” she blurted out a little too quickly, causing one of her now famous blushes. “I do.  I promise.”

William grinned, the first real grin that she had seen make its way across his face, and kissed her again lightly, chastely enough to be proper but still enough to let her know the truth of what he felt.  Her heart had never felt so full, not in all of her days, and she realized then that she would have this life she had dreamed of and she would have it with William.  There would be him and Celia, Trevor and Tommy, and with any luck a baby of their own.  Her tears now were tears of joy, and for the first time William seemed to understand her perfectly.  His grin grew even wider and he held her closer to his chest.

“Well then, if it’s amenable to you, I think we’ve got ourselves a wedding to plan.”

THE END

Finding Elizabeth Harbin

Chapter 1

There are people in this world who shine so brightly it’s blinding. Others fall in love with that brightness and follow it blindly without ever seeing what’s behind that light. Then there are people who disappear into the crowds. They’re quiet in nature and while their light might have the potential to be bright, they never manage to break through.

I fall into the latter category. My name is Elizabeth Harbin and I’ve always been on the shy side. I never saw the need to be loud and ostentatious. The Bible stresses obedience and instructs people to be humble. I’ve always tried to follow those instructions.

My family wasn’t extremely wealthy but we were comfortable. We lived in the small town of Bethel, Virginia and there weren’t many people who could be called rich. The only wealthy family was the Pattersons. John Patterson’s father owned most of the coal mines in Virginia and ever since the locomotive came to town, the whole family had more money than they knew what to do with.

The fact that they were much better off didn’t escape their eldest daughter, Claire. She knew that they were ‘better’ than everyone else. That’s how she saw it anyway. She was a beautiful girl with golden hair and eyes bluer than a spring sky. When she fluttered her eyelashes people fell to their knees. They would have done anything for her. She had the entire town under this strange spell that no one could break free from.

At first look, Claire was a sweet girl with an even sweeter voice and a pretty face you could trust. She exuded confidence, and it radiated out of her and into everyone else. She was beloved by the community and I couldn’t really blame them. Who wouldn’t love someone like her?

While she seemed to be a wonderful person on the outside, the more you got to know her, the thinner that deceit became. When she was around proper company she always curtsied and wore her best dresses. She said, “Yes, Ma’am,” and, “No, sir,” and minded her P’s and Q’s, but when the adults weren’t around she transformed into the most vicious monster you could imagine, and for some reason I became the target of her wrath.

I’m not sure what I did to make Claire dislike me. I never ruffled any feathers and I always kept to myself. We’d grown up together and when you lived in a small town like ours, it was hard not to bump into one another. We’d grown up going to the same school house, sitting just a few desks away from each other, but I couldn’t ever remember doing anything that would have made her want to target me.

I decided that I probably hadn’t done anything and that Claire just didn’t like me for some reason. None of the other girls seemed to catch her evil eye and I hated that we couldn’t get along.  I knew that there was something that was eating away at her soul and I struggled to show the kindness the Bible taught. Jesus loved everyone, even the worst sinner, and I tried to be as patient as him, but I’m only human.

She pulled my hair and pushed me down in the dirt, doing all manner of rude things. She disliked me from the top of my head to the soles of my feet and while I didn’t understand why, I knew it wasn’t going to change. She was the golden child and she could do nothing wrong.

I’d told my mother about the bullying, but when I came home covered in dirt and scratches, she never believed me. She would shake her head and sigh, telling me that envy was a sin. I realized very quickly that my mother didn’t believe a word I said. She couldn’t bring herself to believe that beautiful little Claire could be the evil witch I claimed she was. Mother was convinced that I was envious of Claire’s beauty and grace.

The accusation made my heart ache and eventually I stopped telling mother about the abuse I dealt with on a daily basis. I didn’t want to be seen as an envious person and honestly would have rather suffered in silence. 

Next to Claire I seemed so dull. There weren’t many other young people in our town and all of them were drawn to her. I was the only exception and it made me an outcast. I had no friends and no confidants. I couldn’t even find comfort in my own parents because they wouldn’t believe a word I said about Claire. No one would. They were completely blinded by her.

I found comfort in church and the Bible. The preacher was the only person in town who would give me the time of day. I was afraid to lose his friendship so when I spoke to him, I never told him who or what was causing my problems. He never pushed me or asked me to tell him what was going on. He’d just put a hand on my shoulder and tell me to pray on it. It was the best and only advice anyone had ever given me regarding the situation.

Weeks turned to months and months into years and Claire never stopped teasing me. As we grew older and began turning into young women who were nearly ready to marry, I found that Claire drew the eyes of all the men. She was confident, loud, and beautiful. Who would notice me? I was in constant competition with her and I didn’t even realize it, though my plight became apparent soon enough. As long as I was in the same town as Claire, I would be alone.

My mother even fell for her charisma. She saw Claire as an angel sent from heaven. She was perfect in every way and I was a jealous, redheaded devil. Mother didn’t believe for even a second that Claire could do anything wrong, and that was never going to change. She would just shake her head, clearly disappointed in me, her eyes saying everything.

‘Why can’t you be more like Claire?’

Chapter 2

Claire teased me mercilessly as a child, but as we got older her tricks and teasing became even more vicious. I don’t think children really understand formulaic cruelty. They know that if they call someone names that person will cry and maybe run to their mother. It’s easy to get a rise out of kids when they’re young, but as those children grow up they develop a thick skin and learn how to let those kinds of things roll off their back. They pay less attention to the teasing and the cruelty and so the bullies have to get smarter.

As we grew older we left the school yard and I worked on my parents’ farm, helping them bring in the crop and raise the cattle. Claire always made fun of me for having dirt under my nails and having my hair in an unfashionable braid.

I would sit on the porch and watch the pretty girls walk by. They were dressed in the latest fashion, even though most of their parents could only afford one dress. They wore those same dresses every day and strolled by my house, casting knowing glances and laughing behind their gloved hands. I’d begged my mother to take me into town and buy me a dress like that but she ignored me like always.

As my younger sister got older, my mother saw potential in her. She devoted all of her time and attention to Agnes, ignoring me completely, though that wasn’t really anything new. It took me a long time to figure out why my mother held so much disdain for me, but when I figured it out it broke my heart even more.

She saw everything she hated about herself in me. I had plain features and red hair. She always told me that my only saving grace was my emerald eyes. My mother was almost as cruel as Claire, though her cruelty was her silence and the disappointment that skittered across her face when she looked at me. I wanted so badly for my mother to look upon me with the love and adoration that she offered Claire and my sister. I wanted my name to fall from my mother’s lips with pride, but I knew that would never happen.

As I got older I began to feel all the things a young woman should feel. I was eighteen and most of my friends were starting to get married. They were falling in love and having babies. I wanted that life so badly. For as long as I could remember I’d dreamed of having a family.

There was one boy in particular who caught my eye. His name was Cody Roy and he had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes as bright as the ocean. He was stunning in every way possible. We’d spoken a few times and he seemed kind enough. He didn’t go out of his way to spend time with me, but the few waves and smiles he’d offered were enough to make me pine after him.

I found myself praying that he would notice me. I wanted to be Cody’s wife, and even if it was a long shot, that didn’t matter. I was still going to hope and pray with all my might. I didn’t have much in this world, but I did have prayer.

I sighed as I thought of Cody, wandering into the barn to care for the animals. Just inside the barn there was a small pink envelope. It had clearly been slid under the door. I picked it up and unfolded it, reading the messy handwriting.

Meet me down by the river. I want to talk.

-Cody

My heart began to slam in my chest and my eyes widened. I dropped the bucket and ran towards the woods. The sun was just starting to come up, casting a golden glow over the land. My throat was dry and I knew I’d be in trouble for leaving the animals unfed, but I had to do this. This was the first break I’d gotten! I wasn’t going to leave Cody at the river.

I broke into the clearing that led to the river and as I raised my head I saw Cody. He was smiling, hands tucked in the pockets of his dirty work jeans. He was smiling softly, looking just as handsome as always.

A blush tinted my cheeks pink and I walked over to the river, my heart pounding so hard I could feel it in my temples. He smiled and tilted his head to the side just a little. I stared up at him, my eyes wide and bright with excitement. This was my prayer being answered. Something good was finally starting to happen.

“Hello,” I said, unsure of how to start the conversation.

“Hello. I just wanted to talk to you, alone.”

My entire body flushed with heat and I cleared my throat. “I can’t imagine what you’d want to talk to me about.”

“Honestly, it was just an excuse to spend some quality time with you. You’re always busy.”

I laughed nervously and tucked some hair behind my ear. “I run my family’s farm.” I wasn’t sure why I said that, but I was nervous.

He nodded and reached out, gently touching my cheek, smiling. “You look really beautiful this morning. The sunlight is catching your eyes just right.”

My breath hitched in my throat and I stared up at him, wondering what was happening. This was all so sudden and wonderful. Something felt off about it, but I didn’t want to ruin the moment. This felt like a dream and I didn’t want to wake up.

“Close your eyes, Elizabeth. I have something I want to give you.”

I swallowed but closed my eyes, my lips parted just a little. I was waiting for a peck on the lip or a flower to be placed gently in my hair, but instead I found myself stumbling back after he slapped a handful of the thick, smelly mud from the river on my face. The putrid and coppery smell made my eyes water, though that could have just been tears.

The mud slid off my cheek and plopped on the ground. For a moment I just stood there, staring at him as he laughed. Within moments a group of girls led by Claire emerged from the woods, howling with laughter. Most of the girls and boys I’d grown up with were scattered around me, laughing so hard some of them fell to the ground.

Tears burned in my eyes and I turned, taking off into the woods and pushing people aside. I needed to get out of here. I needed to get as far from the clearing as possible and I needed to get out of this town.

Chapter 3

I ran through the forest, mud drying on my face in the warm spring sun. It smelled coppery and awful. I wanted to get it off my face, but in order to get home I’d have to run through a small collection of houses. One of those houses happened to belong to my one and only friend.

Kate was out in her mother’s garden when I ran past and she must have heard my crying because she jumped up and started after me, calling my name. I collapsed into the soft earth, my hands and knees sinking into the dirt. Her eyes were wide as she looked me over.

“What in the world happened to you, Elizabeth?”

Tears were rolling down my cheek, mixing with the mud as Kate helped me to stand. “I…It was Claire! It was Claire and Cody!” I screamed.

Kate frowned deeply and pulled me close. “Come with me,” she said gently, leading me to her house.

She knew how awful my mother could be and she knew that my mother had no patience for me. If I came home covered in mud she’d scold me for horsing around by the river bank and getting myself all dirty. My dress was already stained from the mud, and there was nothing I could do about that.

Kate sat me in a chair and started to wipe my cheek as I stared blankly at the floor. “Someone has to do something about her,” Kate mumbled.

“No one ever will.” My voice sounded so defeated and I could tell it was breaking Kate’s heart.

“Well then, it seems you have to do something, then.”

“But what?”

Kate hesitated and leaned in close. “You’re of marrying age, Elizabeth,” she began. “You could get married.”

“Who’s going to marry me? I have a reputation here thanks to Claire and he goons.”

“Then you don’t get married here.”

I frowned at Kate and looked her up and down, wiping what was left of the mud from my face as well as the tears. “What do you mean?”
She sighed. “I’ve heard of this thing called ‘mail order brides.’ Men out west send ads back to the east and try and get women to go out there and live with them. It’s a tough land so the women are sparse.” She chewed her lip. “I would miss you, but you could start over there. Claire wouldn’t be able to find you and her words couldn’t follow you.”

“It seems a bit drastic.”

“It is, but it might be your only option to find a husband.”

I hesitated a moment before nodding. “You’re right.”

She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me close. “I don’t want you to leave, but I know life is impossible for you here. Maybe you just need to start over.”

I pulled away and nodded numbly, thanking her before leaving and setting down the muddy path that would take me home. My skin tingled from the perfumed water Kate had washed me with and I was thankful for the pleasant smell. The smell of the acrid mud made it impossible not to think of Cody’s betrayal.

As I pushed the door open and wandered inside my heart dropped into my stomach. My mother was leaning over a fire, stirring dinner. I tried to sneak past her but she heard me and frowned, looking me up and down.

“What in the world happened to you, child?”

I knew I couldn’t tell her the truth. She wouldn’t believe me. She never did. If I told her that Claire came up with a plot to embarrass me in front of the entire town she would accuse me of slandering the poor girl and send me to my room, shaking her head in disappointment.

“A horse rode by and splashed mud onto my dress.”

“Why were you walking so close to the road? Do you know how much work it’s going to take me to get the mud out of that dress? And that’s if I can get it out at all!” she scolded, standing up and stomping over to me.

She jerked me around, untying my dress and leaving me in only my slip. “Stupid girl,” she murmured. “Go get cleaned up for dinner.”

I turned and all but ran up the stairs, managing to hold the tears back until I was safely behind my door. My heart was pounding in my chest and my eyes stung with tears. I made the decision right then and there that I was going to leave. If I stayed I’d wilt and die.

After that night I started going to the church every day and looking at the ads that were posted on the side of the building. They were all ads requesting mail order brides. Some of them requested that women with certain hair and eye colors answer the ad, but most seemed to be directed at any woman who was willing to take the risk.

I started communicating with a man who owned coal mines in the west. He told me he was very wealthy and I told him I was very obedient. After we exchanged a few letters back and forth I was surprised when an envelope with $100 arrived in the mail. It was my traveling expenses. He instructed me to pay my way onto a wagon train and have them drop me off in Madison, Wisconsin.

It seemed like a long and hard road but I was ready to take on the challenge. After all, anything would have been better than staying here. I couldn’t let the opportunity pass me by.